Soul Song 4/?
Title: Soul Song 4/?
Pairing: Yoochun/Jaejoong (side pairings: Changmin/Junsu, Yunho/Yoohwan)
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: I'd claim them as my soulmates, but that would make me a liar. They only belong to each other.
Summary: Jaejoong can't hear his soul song, not the way everyone is supposed to. He's given up on ever finding a soulmate. But he can't keep music completely out of his life, especially when Park Yoochun plays his way right into Jaejoong's heart.
A/N: A soulmate fic for everyone that reminded me that I hadn't written one and that I always meant to. Special shoutout to winged-kame for helping me with the idea/plotline.
Part 4:
Jaejoong moaned, eyes refusing to open, and then fluttering and shutting tightly at the dim light around him. God, he’d been a little too drunk. He wondered what he’d said to Yoochun. The image of his concerned face swam through the rest of whatever went on last night.
The club. The piano. The soulmates. Chanyeol and Baekhyun. The proper soulmates. His chest tightened as he remembered. Why didn’t alcohol actually do what it was supposed to and make you forget? The two of them had been smiling, laughing, dancing, looking at each other with such adoration. Nothing like his meeting with Yoochun. No pain. No heartache.
Jaejoong vaguely remembered Yoochun washing his skin, making him drink water, kisses and touches, and his deep voice calling Jaejoong a cute drunk. He worried a little and he shouldn’t have. Yoochun took care of him, slipped off his clothes and put him to bed with a kiss and a smile. The most beautiful smile in the world.
He shifted, noting a slight headache and a dry mouth. And soft touches on his stomach.
“Are you composing on me again?” he grumbled.
Yoochun chuckled. “Nope. Just touching. You have a sexy body.”
Jaejoong grunted and spun to his side, away from Yoochun, and curled up.
Warmth spread over his side, lips touched his shoulder. “Do you want to wake up yet?”
“No.”
Yoochun tightened his arm around Jaejoong’s waist. “Okay, but I’m in here running interference. There’s only so long I can distract my brother and his soulmate before they come barging in here, demanding to meet you.”
Jaejoong moaned and buried his head in the pillow. Yoochun’s bed was much softer than Jaejoong’s, and he had lots of pillows.
“Why don’t you get up and shower, and I’ll have coffee waiting for you as soon as you want it?”
“Yeah, okay. Fine.” Jaejoong huffed. “Is this just a ploy to get me to cook breakfast?”
Yoochun laughed, and the sound was not harsh on his ears, nor did it make his sore head pound. It was such a lovely noise, and Jaejoong found himself smiling.
“It is not, but I will not say no to breakfast.”
“Ass.”
“Insult?”
“Yes.”
Yoochun pouted.
With a laugh, Jaejoong pulled his mouth down to his for a kiss. But Yoochun made a face and said, “Use my toothbrush too, if you want.”
Jaejoong put his hand on Yoochun’s cheek and pushed him away.
Yoochun fought back, tackled him to the bed, and kissed his neck instead of his mouth, and Jaejoong moaned, going slack under him, but arms tight around his shoulders.
“Ass?” Yoochun asked, an eyebrow lifted.
Jaejoong groaned and toppled him off the bed.
Laughing, Yoochun reached up touched his cheek and said, “It’s so good to have you, soulmate of mine.”
Jaejoong’s throat tightened and he nodded. “You have no idea.”
“I have some. Soon, that sadness in your eyes will go away. As soon as you realize that you’ve found me, that I’m sticking around, that I won’t go away.”
Jaejoong growled and pulled the pillow over his face to hide his tears. “Go away.”
Fingers danced down the flowers tattooed on his back. He chuckled. “See you soon.”
Jaejoong lay in the bed for a little longer, just long enough to get his emotions under control. He sat up carefully, thankful that his head was not too sore. He’d had a lot to drink, but he could definitely hold his alcohol. He glanced around the room, curious as to his new soulmate.
It was really clean. Like spotless clean, and Jaejoong winced a little. Too clean? Maybe Yoochun had straightened up before he woke up. Something told him though that his new soulmate was a neat freak.
He had a dresser and a small bookcase. And a piano. Of course he had a piano. It was an electric one, connected to a few monitors and other pieces of recording equipment. All neat and organized. Free of dust, cords all wrapped in an organized way. There was a second desk that was not as neat as everything else. Strewed with papers and pencils, two sets of headphones, a laptop. An ashtray. Empty, but there.
Arching over everything was a bouquet of flowers. Mostly pink roses, scattered with yellow carnations. Jaejoong went there first and smiled as he smelled them. A little note card had his name on it. He flipped it over.
Beautiful Soulmate - I’ve been up for hours and have wanted to wake you so badly. So instead, I went to the market. There are donuts! - Hopefully Yours, Park Yoochun
Jaejoong scrubbed at his eyes, at the tears in them, and muttered, “Jerk, stupid, loving, caring, perfect jerk.” He smiled.
There were two doors in the room, one led to a small walk-in closet, and the other led to a bathroom. The bathroom was spotless. Just as clean as everything else. Jaejoong winced and made a mental note to try to be neater. A blue towel sat upon the counter, and a brand new toothbrush, in its packaging. Jaejoong huffed again. But not in irritation at Yoochun. Just at himself for being so emotional because Yoochun was so attentive.
He took a quick shower, thankful that the last few lingering effects of his night were washed away as well as the taste in his mouth. The notes that Yoochun had drawn on his stomach had faded. He looked at them in the mirror and tried to hum them but they were backwards. With the towel around his waist, he went back into the room and wondered if Yoochun would mind if he borrowed some sweats. He wasn’t really sure about wearing Yoochun’s clothes, but he didn’t want to wear his slacks. He just wanted to relax a little.
He needn’t have worried. Yoochun had slipped into the room while he was in the shower and had laid out an outfit for him on his bed, complete with another note that said, “Normally, I’d tell you to stay naked, but my brother is home. These should fit you!” There were music notes drawn all over the card.
Jaejoong swallowed at the naked part. Yoochun kept making sexual comments. But they’d only known each other for two days. Maybe three if you count that first day at the shop.
Maybe a lifetime. Sure felt like a lifetime. Maybe that was the secret to soulmates.
Jaejoong slipped on the jeans, soft denim, well-worn, and the blue T-shirt. It wasn’t his style, but Yoochun was right and they fit him well. He’d still feel mostly naked until he had accessories on him, but he was here to relax, not impress. He ran the towel over his head one more time, caught himself from just tossing it on the floor, and went back to the bathroom to hang it over the shower rod.
It took a few more minutes, a few more pep talks, before he was able to open the bedroom door and find his way to the sound of voices and laughter coming from the kitchen.
The first person he saw was not his soulmate, but someone that looked so much like his soulmate that Jaejoong stopped in the kitchen doorway in surprise. Yoochun had said his brother was younger, not that they were twins. It was strangely creepy how much they looked alike but how obviously different they were. Both tall, lanky, broad shoulders, and long hair. Yoochun’s face was wider, his brother’s nose a little sharper.
And then he saw Yoochun, and everything else went away, and he smiled, accepting arms around his waist and a soft kiss to his lips.
“Much better,” Yoochun murmured and then kissed him a little deeper, making Jaejoong’s head spin a bit.
“All right, all right, come on.”
Yoochun pulled away and smiled. “Feeling better?”
“Maybe after another kiss,” Jaejoong said.
Yoochun leaned in to do just that, and then jerked away, face wincing in pain. His brother had him by the ponytail, yanking harshly. “Enough.”
Yoochun swung out and smacked his brother in the side, which had the other letting go of his hair. “Fucking ow, Yoohwannie.”
“Leave him alone, Yoohwan,” someone else said.
Jaejoong turned to the other man in the room who was sipping on a mug. He was gorgeous, in the way that models and movie stars were attractive. Perfect brown hair, perfect smile, perfect small face. Jaejoong blushed and stammered a greeting.
“It is really good to meet you,” he said. “I’m Jung Yunho.”
And while his face was welcoming, Yoohwan’s was not. He had his arms crossed, eyes narrowed.
“Yoohwan, leave him alone,” Yoochun said immediately. “Here, Jaejoong-ah, sit down. I’ll get you coffee. Something tells me you like it sweet.”
Jaejoong thought of something cute to say and then decided not to, and then decided, why the hell not? Yoochun had been showering him with little pet names and cute little sayings for three days. “You know that about me because I like you so much and you’re so sweet, right?”
Yoochun laughed and said, “Actually, there’s no other way for you to be so sweet without eating and drinking whatever you can that is full of sugar.”
Jaejoong fought back a blush, and Yoohwan rolled his eyes, and Jaejoong looked at the table.
“Speaking of sweet, here,” Yunho said and pushed over the box of donuts. “Yoochun made us save you one.”
Jaejoong smiled. “Thank you.”
Yoochun set the coffee in front of him and then pulled a chair close and sat next to him, hand on his leg.
Yunho laughed. “Give him some space, Yoochun-ah. You don’t need to be staring at him so much. He’s going to think you’re weird.”
“But I have to,” Yoochun said. “He’s too beautiful not to stare at.”
Jaejoong felt some of the berry filling drip onto his palm and he immediately shoved it against Yoochun’s cheek. “Go away.”
“Ew, Joongie. Gross.”
“If you lean over and lick that off his face, I’m going to kick him out of my apartment,” Yoohwan said.
Yoochun laughed and used a napkin to wipe it away.
“So you’re with my brother for his money,” Yoohwan said.
Yoochun’s smile fell and he glared at his brother.
Yunho said his name sharply.
“Well,” he said, throwing his hands in the air, “even you admitted that he can’t hear your soul song, what do you expect me to think!”
“Money?” Jaejoong said.
It was quiet, and then Yoochun said, voice low and more serious than Jaejoong had heard it, “Jaejoong doesn’t know anything about my money, dongsaeng. And I told you, he doesn’t hear my song, but he hears his. F majors. All of them. You know as well as I do that my soul song is not F majors, but when I sing it, he hears F majors.”
“I know as well as you do that you’d believe anything just to have a soulmate.”
Silence settled again, and Jaejoong put his hand on Yoochun’s shoulder. His face had fallen in anguish, and Yoohwan mumbled an apology.
“That’s it,” Yunho said and stood up. “We’re going out. Yoochun-ah, Jaejoong-shi, the place is yours. We’ll be back after this ass stops being an ass.”
“I just don’t want you to get hurt anymore,” Yoohwan said, fighting against the hold Yunho had on his arm.
Yoochun nodded. “I know, and I appreciate that, but I don’t want Jaejoong to get hurt anymore either. He’s lived his entire life in despair.”
“So he claims.”
Yunho pulled him harder and said, “That’s enough, Yoohwan. Come on.”
“Fine. Just ... fine.”
Jaejoong bit his lip, and they were quiet until the two of them left the apartment, whispering angrily at each other.
“Sorry,” Yoochun said. “He’s ... protective.”
Jaejoong nodded. “I understand. After what happened to you in America.” He bit his lip against more doubts. After another moment of silence, Jaejoong said, “So money?”
Yoochun chuckled. “I’m rich. Well, I’m not really rich, rich but I’m definitely not poor. I’m a musician. I’ve sold songs to entertainment companies and advertising firms. I write songs for pop artists and commercials. Things like that.”
“Oh. Wow. That’s really cool.”
“I hope VIXX wants to sing happy love songs from now on.”
“VIXX, really?”
“Yeah. Every album of theirs has a song of mine on it.”
“That’s pretty awesome.”
“I’ve only really been living with Yoohwan to have enough money for my own place, which I now have, I just haven’t wanted to move out and be alone, but he’s been a bitch the last few days. I’m really sorry about my brother, and Changmin and Junsu last night. They just ... they just don’t see you the way I see you, and it’s going to take some time.”
Jaejoong smiled and leaned against his shoulder. “I know. It’s okay.”
“And I know it’s going to take you some time too.” Yoochun tilted his head up, hands soft on his cheeks. “I know you still have doubts, my love. I know you do, and I know that I cannot erase those doubts in only three days, but please let me. Let me love you. Let me help you. You are my soulmate. I feel that so strongly. Every moment with you reinforces it in my heart and my soul.”
Jaejoong’s throat tightened and he accepted a kiss to his lips and once again found himself crying. Too many tears for something that should have been happy.
“There you go again,” Yoochun said with a soft smile. “So many doubts. I love you. This is us now. This is who we are. Meant for each other. Soulmates. Say it.”
Jaejoong swallowed. “What?”
“Say it. Say it out loud, so you can hear yourself say it, say that we are soulmates. You haven’t yet.”
Jaejoong bit his lip and realized that Yoochun was right. He’d never said that outloud. He swallowed again and whispered, “Soulmates. You’re my soulmate.”
“Only half way, babe,” Yoochun said.
Jaejoong ran his hands through his hair in frustration.
“You don’t think you’re my soulmate,” Yoochun said, “and that hurts my heart. It hurts my soul. Drag me off to jail for saying this, but a soulmate is more than just a song. It’s more than that. After the last three days, how the hell are we such good friends? How the hell do I know what you’re thinking? How the hell do we already know so much about each other? And why the hell does it feel like I’ve spent lifetimes with you instead of just three days? There’s no way we’d be like this if we were not soulmates, and you know it.”
Jaejoong nodded. “I’m so sorry. I--”
“And why the hell do I understand you so well?” Yoochun said, hand on his cheek. “I understand your doubts and why you have them. I understand that you’ve been alone for so long and you’ve had to protect your heart and soul from disappointment and anguish. I want to get rid of that anguish wrapped around your heart. I want to spend the rest of our lives making you smile.”
Jaejoong hugged him tightly, arms around his shoulders, and Yoochun held him just as tightly, arms around his waist. With his eyes shut, he felt Yoochun’s breath on his neck, felt his heartbeat under his skin. It took a few long minutes for the tightness to leave his throat, for the tears to slow enough to actually say anything. And when he did, it was right against Yoochun’s ear, lips on his soft skin, tongue against the piercing in the lobe. “Soulmates,” Jaejoong said, voice deep, harsh, like he’d spent the last few minutes screaming.
Just like his soul was screaming for his soulmate.
“Soulmates,” he said again and cleared his throat.
Yoochun pushed him away, hand on his cheek again, rubbing away the tears.
“Soulmates,” Jaejoong said.
Yoochun nodded. “Soulmates.”
Jaejoong tried to breath, voice breaking as he said, “We are soulmates.” And then he said it again, a little louder.
Yoochun smiled. “We are soulmates.”
“I’m sorry,” Jaejoong said, and hugged him tightly. “I’m sorry. I’m a mess. I can’t even ... This isn’t ...”
Yoochun hushed him. “You’re perfect. You are my soulmate. We are soulmates.”
Jaejoong held him for a little longer and nodded. “We are. You are. I am your soulmate.”
“Baby,” Yoochun cooed and kissed him.
Jaejoong whimpered and kissed him back, until he could not breathe, and then he pulled away, their breaths echoing around them in the kitchen.
“This is a really weird time to bring this up, but I’m supposed to babysit today, do you mind?”
Jaejoong stared at him, still with tears on his cheeks, and he laughed. “You’re so weird. Way to spoil an emotional moment.”
“I had to bring it up because Junho is bringing Seoyeong over soon. I can cancel if you don’t want to.”
“It sounds like fun. I babysit my sisters’ kids sometimes. Junho’s a friend of yours?”
“He is Junsu’s twin brother. Like a lot of twins, they found their soulmates almost within a day of each other. Her name is Hana. Their daughter is five, and they have a son on the way. Junho likes to take his wife out on Sundays without Seoyeong, just to give her a break until the baby is born.”
Jaejoong smiled. “Will I get green toenails, too?”
Yoochun laughed. “If you’re worthy, she’ll paint yours in pink.”
“That sounds like a lot of fun.”
Yoochun glanced behind him at the clock on the wall. “I called Junho earlier and said I’d call him back after I’d talked to you. I’ll tell him to come on over. It won’t be for long. Just a few hours.”
“Does Seoyeong like cupcakes?”
Yoochun lifted an eyebrow. “She’s five, so yes.”
“Do you like cupcakes?” Jaejoong asked with a teasing smile.
“I’m almost twenty-five, so yes.”
Jaejoong laughed. “Do you have the stuff I need to make cupcakes?”
“We should. Yunho-hyung likes to think he can cook, but it’s usually disastrous. Poke around. I’ll go call Junho.” Yoochun stood up, and then leaned over him and pressed another kiss to his lips. “You’re everything I’ve always thought my soulmate would be, Kim Jaejoong.”
Jaejoong blushed and ducked his head.
With a small smile, Yoochun ran his hand through Jaejoong’s hair and then left the kitchen, whistling at first their soul song, and then variations. Jaejoong heard the variations. His soulmate was so understanding. Too understanding.
What if Jaejoong never heard his soul song? What if Yoochun was wrong that he’d learn to hear it?
He rubbed his face in his hands and stood up with a frustrated growl. It was so hard to be optimistic. So hard to let himself hope. Well, if he couldn’t be completely happy yet, then he might as well make cupcakes, because it was pretty much the same thing.
♪ ♫ ♪ ♫ ♪
Kim Junho was taller than his brother, a bit more broad-shouldered, stronger, and way calmer. He did not have pink hair. His soulmate was almost as tall as he was, skinny except for the baby bump, and long, long hair, longer than Yoochun’s. They were both ecstatic to meet him, and their little daughter Seoyeong was hesitant until Yoochun said the magic word.
Cupcakes.
Within a half hour, Seoyeong had declared Jaejoong-oppa her “besfrent,” which Yoochun translated to “best friend” and Jaejoong was sitting in a chair, with the girl on the floor, carefully painting pink polish onto his toenails (and his toes, and the hardwood floor).
Jaejoong was told that he was not allowed to move while Seoyeong and Yoochun decided on what cartoon to watch.
Seoyeong sat on the floor, her favorite stuffed cat in her hands, and watched the movie. Yoochun snuggled his way into Jaejoong’s lap, squishing them together on the arm chair.
“You still look sad, darling,” Yoochun said. “I don’t want you to be sad anymore.”
Jaejoong hugged him. “I’m better.”
“I know. I’m impatient though. I just want you to be the happiest person in the world because that’s what I feel like.”
Jaejoong sighed. “How ... how can you, especially after the thing in America?”
Yoochun lifted his head and touched his cheek. “What is the first thing you felt when you heard me sing our soul song?”
“Shock,” Jaejoong said.
“What else?”
Jaejoong tried to remember anything beyond the despair once he realized that Yoochun heard something different. He swallowed. “I felt ... like I’d been blow away, like there was wind in my head, rushing through me.”
Yoochun shifted, arms going around Jaejoong, between his back and the chair. “Good. When you play our song, on the piano, every time, that’s what it feels like in my head. Like my mind is wide open, like a long grassy meadow with the wind blowing the grass in patterns to the beat, and you’re on the other side of the meadow. You just have to walk across it, meet me in the middle.”
Jaejoong swallowed and tried not to cry. “I’m ... I ... what if ...”
Yoochun hummed their soul song, cutting Jaejoong off. “No what ifs. Not anymore. Just when. When you walk to me, when you accept me, when you accept yourself. I’ll be here. Okay?”
Jaejoong fought the tightness, lost and pressed his face to Yoochun’s head to hide his tears. It was quiet for a moment and then Seoyeong was demanding to know why Jaejoong was crying, and was it because no cupcakes? Cupcakes. We need cupcakes!
Jaejoong smiled and met Yoochun’s eyes. “We definitely need cupcakes.”
♪ ♫ ♪ ♫ ♪
“You were babysitting? What is wrong with you?”
“He said he didn’t mind?”
“You don’t meet your soulmate and then expect him to babysit a five-year-old. That’s the most unromantic thing ever! And is that pink nail polish on my bamboo floor? Hyung!”
“It will come off. It has before.”
“WHAT? Before? Why was there nail polish on my floor before?”
Jaejoong watched the two of them bicker, a smile on his face.
Yunho came up next to him and flung one arm around his shoulder. In the other hand was a cupcake covered in pink frosting. Loud enough to cut Yoohwan’s next tirade off, he said, “So when are you and Yoochun moving in together, because I have been dreaming for two days of not having to deal with this shit anymore.” He took a huge bite of the cupcake.
Jaejoong blushed and stammered, “W-well, my lease is up in three months.”
Yunho groaned. “Too long.”
Yoochun glared at him. “Just for that. Jaejoong and I will go to his apartment and he will make me the best Kimchi Jigae you two will never have the opportunity of tasting, and then--”
Jaejoong laughed. “It’s fine. I want to cook.”
Yoochun pouted and came to him for a hug. “Fine. But they better be eternally grateful.”
“Already am,” Yunho said and smiled. “He put a smile on your face.”
Yoohwan snorted and mumbled under his breath about annoying, good-for-nothing soulmates, and then he left the room.
“Don’t mind him,” Yunho said. “I’ll appease him later. With my mouth.”
“Ugh,” Yoochun said. “Don’t want to hear it. Literally. Can I move in with you, Jaejoong-ah? I really don’t ever need to hear my brother having sex again.”
Part 5: Andante
Part 3: Dissonance
Part 2: Peace and Harmony
Part 1: Sweet Melody
.
Pairing: Yoochun/Jaejoong (side pairings: Changmin/Junsu, Yunho/Yoohwan)
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: I'd claim them as my soulmates, but that would make me a liar. They only belong to each other.
Summary: Jaejoong can't hear his soul song, not the way everyone is supposed to. He's given up on ever finding a soulmate. But he can't keep music completely out of his life, especially when Park Yoochun plays his way right into Jaejoong's heart.
A/N: A soulmate fic for everyone that reminded me that I hadn't written one and that I always meant to. Special shoutout to winged-kame for helping me with the idea/plotline.
Part 4:
Jaejoong moaned, eyes refusing to open, and then fluttering and shutting tightly at the dim light around him. God, he’d been a little too drunk. He wondered what he’d said to Yoochun. The image of his concerned face swam through the rest of whatever went on last night.
The club. The piano. The soulmates. Chanyeol and Baekhyun. The proper soulmates. His chest tightened as he remembered. Why didn’t alcohol actually do what it was supposed to and make you forget? The two of them had been smiling, laughing, dancing, looking at each other with such adoration. Nothing like his meeting with Yoochun. No pain. No heartache.
Jaejoong vaguely remembered Yoochun washing his skin, making him drink water, kisses and touches, and his deep voice calling Jaejoong a cute drunk. He worried a little and he shouldn’t have. Yoochun took care of him, slipped off his clothes and put him to bed with a kiss and a smile. The most beautiful smile in the world.
He shifted, noting a slight headache and a dry mouth. And soft touches on his stomach.
“Are you composing on me again?” he grumbled.
Yoochun chuckled. “Nope. Just touching. You have a sexy body.”
Jaejoong grunted and spun to his side, away from Yoochun, and curled up.
Warmth spread over his side, lips touched his shoulder. “Do you want to wake up yet?”
“No.”
Yoochun tightened his arm around Jaejoong’s waist. “Okay, but I’m in here running interference. There’s only so long I can distract my brother and his soulmate before they come barging in here, demanding to meet you.”
Jaejoong moaned and buried his head in the pillow. Yoochun’s bed was much softer than Jaejoong’s, and he had lots of pillows.
“Why don’t you get up and shower, and I’ll have coffee waiting for you as soon as you want it?”
“Yeah, okay. Fine.” Jaejoong huffed. “Is this just a ploy to get me to cook breakfast?”
Yoochun laughed, and the sound was not harsh on his ears, nor did it make his sore head pound. It was such a lovely noise, and Jaejoong found himself smiling.
“It is not, but I will not say no to breakfast.”
“Ass.”
“Insult?”
“Yes.”
Yoochun pouted.
With a laugh, Jaejoong pulled his mouth down to his for a kiss. But Yoochun made a face and said, “Use my toothbrush too, if you want.”
Jaejoong put his hand on Yoochun’s cheek and pushed him away.
Yoochun fought back, tackled him to the bed, and kissed his neck instead of his mouth, and Jaejoong moaned, going slack under him, but arms tight around his shoulders.
“Ass?” Yoochun asked, an eyebrow lifted.
Jaejoong groaned and toppled him off the bed.
Laughing, Yoochun reached up touched his cheek and said, “It’s so good to have you, soulmate of mine.”
Jaejoong’s throat tightened and he nodded. “You have no idea.”
“I have some. Soon, that sadness in your eyes will go away. As soon as you realize that you’ve found me, that I’m sticking around, that I won’t go away.”
Jaejoong growled and pulled the pillow over his face to hide his tears. “Go away.”
Fingers danced down the flowers tattooed on his back. He chuckled. “See you soon.”
Jaejoong lay in the bed for a little longer, just long enough to get his emotions under control. He sat up carefully, thankful that his head was not too sore. He’d had a lot to drink, but he could definitely hold his alcohol. He glanced around the room, curious as to his new soulmate.
It was really clean. Like spotless clean, and Jaejoong winced a little. Too clean? Maybe Yoochun had straightened up before he woke up. Something told him though that his new soulmate was a neat freak.
He had a dresser and a small bookcase. And a piano. Of course he had a piano. It was an electric one, connected to a few monitors and other pieces of recording equipment. All neat and organized. Free of dust, cords all wrapped in an organized way. There was a second desk that was not as neat as everything else. Strewed with papers and pencils, two sets of headphones, a laptop. An ashtray. Empty, but there.
Arching over everything was a bouquet of flowers. Mostly pink roses, scattered with yellow carnations. Jaejoong went there first and smiled as he smelled them. A little note card had his name on it. He flipped it over.
Beautiful Soulmate - I’ve been up for hours and have wanted to wake you so badly. So instead, I went to the market. There are donuts! - Hopefully Yours, Park Yoochun
Jaejoong scrubbed at his eyes, at the tears in them, and muttered, “Jerk, stupid, loving, caring, perfect jerk.” He smiled.
There were two doors in the room, one led to a small walk-in closet, and the other led to a bathroom. The bathroom was spotless. Just as clean as everything else. Jaejoong winced and made a mental note to try to be neater. A blue towel sat upon the counter, and a brand new toothbrush, in its packaging. Jaejoong huffed again. But not in irritation at Yoochun. Just at himself for being so emotional because Yoochun was so attentive.
He took a quick shower, thankful that the last few lingering effects of his night were washed away as well as the taste in his mouth. The notes that Yoochun had drawn on his stomach had faded. He looked at them in the mirror and tried to hum them but they were backwards. With the towel around his waist, he went back into the room and wondered if Yoochun would mind if he borrowed some sweats. He wasn’t really sure about wearing Yoochun’s clothes, but he didn’t want to wear his slacks. He just wanted to relax a little.
He needn’t have worried. Yoochun had slipped into the room while he was in the shower and had laid out an outfit for him on his bed, complete with another note that said, “Normally, I’d tell you to stay naked, but my brother is home. These should fit you!” There were music notes drawn all over the card.
Jaejoong swallowed at the naked part. Yoochun kept making sexual comments. But they’d only known each other for two days. Maybe three if you count that first day at the shop.
Maybe a lifetime. Sure felt like a lifetime. Maybe that was the secret to soulmates.
Jaejoong slipped on the jeans, soft denim, well-worn, and the blue T-shirt. It wasn’t his style, but Yoochun was right and they fit him well. He’d still feel mostly naked until he had accessories on him, but he was here to relax, not impress. He ran the towel over his head one more time, caught himself from just tossing it on the floor, and went back to the bathroom to hang it over the shower rod.
It took a few more minutes, a few more pep talks, before he was able to open the bedroom door and find his way to the sound of voices and laughter coming from the kitchen.
The first person he saw was not his soulmate, but someone that looked so much like his soulmate that Jaejoong stopped in the kitchen doorway in surprise. Yoochun had said his brother was younger, not that they were twins. It was strangely creepy how much they looked alike but how obviously different they were. Both tall, lanky, broad shoulders, and long hair. Yoochun’s face was wider, his brother’s nose a little sharper.
And then he saw Yoochun, and everything else went away, and he smiled, accepting arms around his waist and a soft kiss to his lips.
“Much better,” Yoochun murmured and then kissed him a little deeper, making Jaejoong’s head spin a bit.
“All right, all right, come on.”
Yoochun pulled away and smiled. “Feeling better?”
“Maybe after another kiss,” Jaejoong said.
Yoochun leaned in to do just that, and then jerked away, face wincing in pain. His brother had him by the ponytail, yanking harshly. “Enough.”
Yoochun swung out and smacked his brother in the side, which had the other letting go of his hair. “Fucking ow, Yoohwannie.”
“Leave him alone, Yoohwan,” someone else said.
Jaejoong turned to the other man in the room who was sipping on a mug. He was gorgeous, in the way that models and movie stars were attractive. Perfect brown hair, perfect smile, perfect small face. Jaejoong blushed and stammered a greeting.
“It is really good to meet you,” he said. “I’m Jung Yunho.”
And while his face was welcoming, Yoohwan’s was not. He had his arms crossed, eyes narrowed.
“Yoohwan, leave him alone,” Yoochun said immediately. “Here, Jaejoong-ah, sit down. I’ll get you coffee. Something tells me you like it sweet.”
Jaejoong thought of something cute to say and then decided not to, and then decided, why the hell not? Yoochun had been showering him with little pet names and cute little sayings for three days. “You know that about me because I like you so much and you’re so sweet, right?”
Yoochun laughed and said, “Actually, there’s no other way for you to be so sweet without eating and drinking whatever you can that is full of sugar.”
Jaejoong fought back a blush, and Yoohwan rolled his eyes, and Jaejoong looked at the table.
“Speaking of sweet, here,” Yunho said and pushed over the box of donuts. “Yoochun made us save you one.”
Jaejoong smiled. “Thank you.”
Yoochun set the coffee in front of him and then pulled a chair close and sat next to him, hand on his leg.
Yunho laughed. “Give him some space, Yoochun-ah. You don’t need to be staring at him so much. He’s going to think you’re weird.”
“But I have to,” Yoochun said. “He’s too beautiful not to stare at.”
Jaejoong felt some of the berry filling drip onto his palm and he immediately shoved it against Yoochun’s cheek. “Go away.”
“Ew, Joongie. Gross.”
“If you lean over and lick that off his face, I’m going to kick him out of my apartment,” Yoohwan said.
Yoochun laughed and used a napkin to wipe it away.
“So you’re with my brother for his money,” Yoohwan said.
Yoochun’s smile fell and he glared at his brother.
Yunho said his name sharply.
“Well,” he said, throwing his hands in the air, “even you admitted that he can’t hear your soul song, what do you expect me to think!”
“Money?” Jaejoong said.
It was quiet, and then Yoochun said, voice low and more serious than Jaejoong had heard it, “Jaejoong doesn’t know anything about my money, dongsaeng. And I told you, he doesn’t hear my song, but he hears his. F majors. All of them. You know as well as I do that my soul song is not F majors, but when I sing it, he hears F majors.”
“I know as well as you do that you’d believe anything just to have a soulmate.”
Silence settled again, and Jaejoong put his hand on Yoochun’s shoulder. His face had fallen in anguish, and Yoohwan mumbled an apology.
“That’s it,” Yunho said and stood up. “We’re going out. Yoochun-ah, Jaejoong-shi, the place is yours. We’ll be back after this ass stops being an ass.”
“I just don’t want you to get hurt anymore,” Yoohwan said, fighting against the hold Yunho had on his arm.
Yoochun nodded. “I know, and I appreciate that, but I don’t want Jaejoong to get hurt anymore either. He’s lived his entire life in despair.”
“So he claims.”
Yunho pulled him harder and said, “That’s enough, Yoohwan. Come on.”
“Fine. Just ... fine.”
Jaejoong bit his lip, and they were quiet until the two of them left the apartment, whispering angrily at each other.
“Sorry,” Yoochun said. “He’s ... protective.”
Jaejoong nodded. “I understand. After what happened to you in America.” He bit his lip against more doubts. After another moment of silence, Jaejoong said, “So money?”
Yoochun chuckled. “I’m rich. Well, I’m not really rich, rich but I’m definitely not poor. I’m a musician. I’ve sold songs to entertainment companies and advertising firms. I write songs for pop artists and commercials. Things like that.”
“Oh. Wow. That’s really cool.”
“I hope VIXX wants to sing happy love songs from now on.”
“VIXX, really?”
“Yeah. Every album of theirs has a song of mine on it.”
“That’s pretty awesome.”
“I’ve only really been living with Yoohwan to have enough money for my own place, which I now have, I just haven’t wanted to move out and be alone, but he’s been a bitch the last few days. I’m really sorry about my brother, and Changmin and Junsu last night. They just ... they just don’t see you the way I see you, and it’s going to take some time.”
Jaejoong smiled and leaned against his shoulder. “I know. It’s okay.”
“And I know it’s going to take you some time too.” Yoochun tilted his head up, hands soft on his cheeks. “I know you still have doubts, my love. I know you do, and I know that I cannot erase those doubts in only three days, but please let me. Let me love you. Let me help you. You are my soulmate. I feel that so strongly. Every moment with you reinforces it in my heart and my soul.”
Jaejoong’s throat tightened and he accepted a kiss to his lips and once again found himself crying. Too many tears for something that should have been happy.
“There you go again,” Yoochun said with a soft smile. “So many doubts. I love you. This is us now. This is who we are. Meant for each other. Soulmates. Say it.”
Jaejoong swallowed. “What?”
“Say it. Say it out loud, so you can hear yourself say it, say that we are soulmates. You haven’t yet.”
Jaejoong bit his lip and realized that Yoochun was right. He’d never said that outloud. He swallowed again and whispered, “Soulmates. You’re my soulmate.”
“Only half way, babe,” Yoochun said.
Jaejoong ran his hands through his hair in frustration.
“You don’t think you’re my soulmate,” Yoochun said, “and that hurts my heart. It hurts my soul. Drag me off to jail for saying this, but a soulmate is more than just a song. It’s more than that. After the last three days, how the hell are we such good friends? How the hell do I know what you’re thinking? How the hell do we already know so much about each other? And why the hell does it feel like I’ve spent lifetimes with you instead of just three days? There’s no way we’d be like this if we were not soulmates, and you know it.”
Jaejoong nodded. “I’m so sorry. I--”
“And why the hell do I understand you so well?” Yoochun said, hand on his cheek. “I understand your doubts and why you have them. I understand that you’ve been alone for so long and you’ve had to protect your heart and soul from disappointment and anguish. I want to get rid of that anguish wrapped around your heart. I want to spend the rest of our lives making you smile.”
Jaejoong hugged him tightly, arms around his shoulders, and Yoochun held him just as tightly, arms around his waist. With his eyes shut, he felt Yoochun’s breath on his neck, felt his heartbeat under his skin. It took a few long minutes for the tightness to leave his throat, for the tears to slow enough to actually say anything. And when he did, it was right against Yoochun’s ear, lips on his soft skin, tongue against the piercing in the lobe. “Soulmates,” Jaejoong said, voice deep, harsh, like he’d spent the last few minutes screaming.
Just like his soul was screaming for his soulmate.
“Soulmates,” he said again and cleared his throat.
Yoochun pushed him away, hand on his cheek again, rubbing away the tears.
“Soulmates,” Jaejoong said.
Yoochun nodded. “Soulmates.”
Jaejoong tried to breath, voice breaking as he said, “We are soulmates.” And then he said it again, a little louder.
Yoochun smiled. “We are soulmates.”
“I’m sorry,” Jaejoong said, and hugged him tightly. “I’m sorry. I’m a mess. I can’t even ... This isn’t ...”
Yoochun hushed him. “You’re perfect. You are my soulmate. We are soulmates.”
Jaejoong held him for a little longer and nodded. “We are. You are. I am your soulmate.”
“Baby,” Yoochun cooed and kissed him.
Jaejoong whimpered and kissed him back, until he could not breathe, and then he pulled away, their breaths echoing around them in the kitchen.
“This is a really weird time to bring this up, but I’m supposed to babysit today, do you mind?”
Jaejoong stared at him, still with tears on his cheeks, and he laughed. “You’re so weird. Way to spoil an emotional moment.”
“I had to bring it up because Junho is bringing Seoyeong over soon. I can cancel if you don’t want to.”
“It sounds like fun. I babysit my sisters’ kids sometimes. Junho’s a friend of yours?”
“He is Junsu’s twin brother. Like a lot of twins, they found their soulmates almost within a day of each other. Her name is Hana. Their daughter is five, and they have a son on the way. Junho likes to take his wife out on Sundays without Seoyeong, just to give her a break until the baby is born.”
Jaejoong smiled. “Will I get green toenails, too?”
Yoochun laughed. “If you’re worthy, she’ll paint yours in pink.”
“That sounds like a lot of fun.”
Yoochun glanced behind him at the clock on the wall. “I called Junho earlier and said I’d call him back after I’d talked to you. I’ll tell him to come on over. It won’t be for long. Just a few hours.”
“Does Seoyeong like cupcakes?”
Yoochun lifted an eyebrow. “She’s five, so yes.”
“Do you like cupcakes?” Jaejoong asked with a teasing smile.
“I’m almost twenty-five, so yes.”
Jaejoong laughed. “Do you have the stuff I need to make cupcakes?”
“We should. Yunho-hyung likes to think he can cook, but it’s usually disastrous. Poke around. I’ll go call Junho.” Yoochun stood up, and then leaned over him and pressed another kiss to his lips. “You’re everything I’ve always thought my soulmate would be, Kim Jaejoong.”
Jaejoong blushed and ducked his head.
With a small smile, Yoochun ran his hand through Jaejoong’s hair and then left the kitchen, whistling at first their soul song, and then variations. Jaejoong heard the variations. His soulmate was so understanding. Too understanding.
What if Jaejoong never heard his soul song? What if Yoochun was wrong that he’d learn to hear it?
He rubbed his face in his hands and stood up with a frustrated growl. It was so hard to be optimistic. So hard to let himself hope. Well, if he couldn’t be completely happy yet, then he might as well make cupcakes, because it was pretty much the same thing.
♪ ♫ ♪ ♫ ♪
Kim Junho was taller than his brother, a bit more broad-shouldered, stronger, and way calmer. He did not have pink hair. His soulmate was almost as tall as he was, skinny except for the baby bump, and long, long hair, longer than Yoochun’s. They were both ecstatic to meet him, and their little daughter Seoyeong was hesitant until Yoochun said the magic word.
Cupcakes.
Within a half hour, Seoyeong had declared Jaejoong-oppa her “besfrent,” which Yoochun translated to “best friend” and Jaejoong was sitting in a chair, with the girl on the floor, carefully painting pink polish onto his toenails (and his toes, and the hardwood floor).
Jaejoong was told that he was not allowed to move while Seoyeong and Yoochun decided on what cartoon to watch.
Seoyeong sat on the floor, her favorite stuffed cat in her hands, and watched the movie. Yoochun snuggled his way into Jaejoong’s lap, squishing them together on the arm chair.
“You still look sad, darling,” Yoochun said. “I don’t want you to be sad anymore.”
Jaejoong hugged him. “I’m better.”
“I know. I’m impatient though. I just want you to be the happiest person in the world because that’s what I feel like.”
Jaejoong sighed. “How ... how can you, especially after the thing in America?”
Yoochun lifted his head and touched his cheek. “What is the first thing you felt when you heard me sing our soul song?”
“Shock,” Jaejoong said.
“What else?”
Jaejoong tried to remember anything beyond the despair once he realized that Yoochun heard something different. He swallowed. “I felt ... like I’d been blow away, like there was wind in my head, rushing through me.”
Yoochun shifted, arms going around Jaejoong, between his back and the chair. “Good. When you play our song, on the piano, every time, that’s what it feels like in my head. Like my mind is wide open, like a long grassy meadow with the wind blowing the grass in patterns to the beat, and you’re on the other side of the meadow. You just have to walk across it, meet me in the middle.”
Jaejoong swallowed and tried not to cry. “I’m ... I ... what if ...”
Yoochun hummed their soul song, cutting Jaejoong off. “No what ifs. Not anymore. Just when. When you walk to me, when you accept me, when you accept yourself. I’ll be here. Okay?”
Jaejoong fought the tightness, lost and pressed his face to Yoochun’s head to hide his tears. It was quiet for a moment and then Seoyeong was demanding to know why Jaejoong was crying, and was it because no cupcakes? Cupcakes. We need cupcakes!
Jaejoong smiled and met Yoochun’s eyes. “We definitely need cupcakes.”
♪ ♫ ♪ ♫ ♪
“You were babysitting? What is wrong with you?”
“He said he didn’t mind?”
“You don’t meet your soulmate and then expect him to babysit a five-year-old. That’s the most unromantic thing ever! And is that pink nail polish on my bamboo floor? Hyung!”
“It will come off. It has before.”
“WHAT? Before? Why was there nail polish on my floor before?”
Jaejoong watched the two of them bicker, a smile on his face.
Yunho came up next to him and flung one arm around his shoulder. In the other hand was a cupcake covered in pink frosting. Loud enough to cut Yoohwan’s next tirade off, he said, “So when are you and Yoochun moving in together, because I have been dreaming for two days of not having to deal with this shit anymore.” He took a huge bite of the cupcake.
Jaejoong blushed and stammered, “W-well, my lease is up in three months.”
Yunho groaned. “Too long.”
Yoochun glared at him. “Just for that. Jaejoong and I will go to his apartment and he will make me the best Kimchi Jigae you two will never have the opportunity of tasting, and then--”
Jaejoong laughed. “It’s fine. I want to cook.”
Yoochun pouted and came to him for a hug. “Fine. But they better be eternally grateful.”
“Already am,” Yunho said and smiled. “He put a smile on your face.”
Yoohwan snorted and mumbled under his breath about annoying, good-for-nothing soulmates, and then he left the room.
“Don’t mind him,” Yunho said. “I’ll appease him later. With my mouth.”
“Ugh,” Yoochun said. “Don’t want to hear it. Literally. Can I move in with you, Jaejoong-ah? I really don’t ever need to hear my brother having sex again.”
Part 5: Andante
Part 3: Dissonance
Part 2: Peace and Harmony
Part 1: Sweet Melody
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