Confession
Title: Confession
Pairing: Yunho/Yoochun
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: They are not mine to teach how to kiss.
Summary: Yoochun is Yunho's neighbor, definitely his best friend, despite the age difference. Can a kiss ruin everything?
Warning: Yunho is 21, Yoochun is 17
Please do not use this fic as a way to talk about the current allegations against Yoochun.
Yunho had just a few more edits, a few more lines, to write on this last college application. He heard his door open, but did not turn to see who it was. He knew who it was. He had to concentrate.
A few minutes later, a deep sigh echoed through the room.
And then another one.
He smiled, typing a few more words. “How many times are you going to sigh before you finally tell me what is bothering you?” He spared a glance at his bed and wished he hadn’t.
Park Yoochun had been his neighbor for the last ten years, since Yunho was eleven years old and Yoochun seven years old. They were four years apart, but they were practically best friends. Yoochun’s mother worked hard to support their small family of three, and Yoochun and his little brother Yoohwan had always spent most of their time after school at Yunho’s house.
At seventeen, Park Yoochun was almost done with high school. He was in his uniform: khakis, white shirt, wrinkled jacket. Yunho supposed the tie had already been shoved into his backpack, the one currently lying almost in the middle of his floor. Yoochun was very neat, very clean, just the fact that he’d thrown the bag down and not bothered to put it on a chair or desk or neatly against the wall had Yunho worried.
Mostly worried.
Yoochun was sprawled out, arms above his head, one foot still on the floor, the other bent at the knee. His bare toes were tightened on the bedspread. His shirt was bunched a bit too high, showing a pale expanse of skin at his hips.
Yunho swallowed and said, “What?” It came out a little too harsh, and Yoochun pouted and turned away from him, curling up in a ball.
“Nothing,” he muttered. “I know you’re trying--”
Yunho scoffed and quickly saved his essay. It was almost done. He’d finish it later. He went to the bed and sat down, just behind Yoochun. He kept his hands to himself.
Yoochun huffed again.
“All right, dongsaeng. Talk.”
“It’s embarrassing.”
“Says the boy who peed in my--”
“Yah! Shut up!” Yoochun said and turned around to shove him away.
Yunho laughed and tugged on his arm. “Come on, you can tell me anything. You know that.”
Yoochun bit his lip and shook his head. He pulled one of Yunho’s pillows to his face and screamed into it.
Now, really worried, Yunho shifted around until he had his back to the wall and his arms around Yoochun’s body. Instead of the pillow, Yoochun pressed his face to Yunho’s thigh, his body shaking. Yunho was not sure if Yoochun was crying. He rubbed Yoochun’s shoulder..
“I’m really glad you’re home from the army,” Yoochun murmured, his hand tightening on Yunho’s leg, just above his knee.
Holding his breath, Yunho let himself play with Yoochun’s long hair. He was really glad he was home too. He’d only seen Yoochun during his leave. “They’re going to make you cut your hair.”
Yoochun snorted. “In a couple years. Not until I have to.”
“Tell me what’s wrong.”
Yoochun shifted again until he was laying on his back, head on Yunho’s thigh. Again one foot was straight, hanging off the edge of the bed. The other was bent, toes curling into the blanket. Yunho’s fingers strayed to Yoochun’s neck before he realized what he was doing and then he snatched them back.
Yoochun lay there with his eyes shut (good because it let Yunho just look at him) and his lips in a pout. A very tempting, beautiful pout with a plump lower lip, shining from Yoochun sucking it into his mouth. The white shirt was askew, a few buttons straining, revealing more pale skin. And it was pulled up higher, showing Yoochun’s flat stomach, belly button, hips.
Yunho shut his eyes for a few breaths of tight control.
“I want to be kissed,” Yoochun finally said, just blurting it out.
Yunho choked on his own spit and stared down at Yoochun. He still had his eyes shut. “What?”
Yoochun growled and sat up suddenly, running his hands through his hair. “Kissed. You know. Lips together. Two people.”
“You haven’t ...” Yunho trailed off, in awe. Yoochun was a popular boy at his school. Girls came over to his house often to talk to him and ask him out.
Yoochun huffed. “No. And I want to.”
“I’m sure there are lots of girls more than willing--”
Yoochun turned to him, face serious, and met his eyes. “No girls.”
And it all just suddenly made sense. It was this talk. This moment. Yunho had flying hopes that Yoochun liked boys, had fantasies of convincing him. But Yoochun was only seventeen.
“Okay, then boys,” Yunho managed to say. “I’m sure there are lots of boys--”
Yoochun sighed, pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around his legs. He shook his head. “There aren’t. They don’t ... no one in my class will admit to liking boys.”
“That makes things difficult.”
“I just feel so lame,” Yoochun continued. “It’s like everyone else has been kissed but me, and I don’t really expect more than that, but god, just a kiss! You had your first kiss when you were thirteen!”
Yunho smiled. “You just need to be patient.”
“I’m tired of being patient.”
Their eyes met again, and Yunho fought not to swallow.
Yoochun smiled. Slow, a bit greasy. He was not innocent or naive. Yunho knew that. And as Yoochun slowly unwound, turning toward him, Yunho knew just what he was going to propose.
Yunho pushed off the bed. “No way.”
“Hyung!”
“No.”
“Why not?”
Yunho sat back down on his computer and pulled up his essay. “Not going to happen.”
“Come on,” Yoochun said and followed after him, just to the edge of the bed, where he kneeled, hands on his knees. “You’ve kissed boys before, and it’s just a kiss. I want to know what it’s like.”
Yoochun had no idea that it would be so much more than a kiss to Yunho.
“No. You’re too young for me.”
Yoochun snorted. “Did you just hear me confess my undying love? No. I just want a kiss.”
“It’s weird.”
“Why?”
Yunho’s hands shook on the keyboard. “Because ... you’re ... you ... it’s just weird.”
“I’m not sure if I should be insulted or not. It’s just a kiss.”
“No.”
“Please.”
Yunho made the mistake of looking over at him. At that pout. The wide eyes. The look that Yunho had never been able to say no to. The gleam in Yoochun’s eyes meant that Yoochun knew he won.
Yunho sighed again and shook his head. “You’re ...”
“It’s just a kiss.”
“Fine. But not on the bed. Come over here.”
Yoochun vaulted from the bed with a victorious noise.
“Don’t sound so pleased with yourself,” Yunho muttered.
“You always give me what I want.”
Yunho stuck his tongue out at him.
Laughing, Yoochun moved closer and Yunho spread his legs in the chair to make room for him. He bit his lip, and Yunho smiled.
“Well?” Yunho said.
“I have ... but you need ... but ...”
Yunho laughed.
“Shut up, hyung. What do I do?”
“Kiss me.” Yunho puckered his lips in an exaggerated pout.
“Hyung!” Yoochun said and put his hand on Yunho’s face and pushed.
Yunho chuckled. “First of all, you need to come closer.” He really hoped that Yoochun did not notice how much his hands were shaking when he settled them on his hips and pulled him until his knees bumped the chair. “And now kiss me.”
“H-how?” Yoochun sucked his lip into his mouth, suddenly nervous and Yunho’s head went light with the effort to keep from moaning.
“Hands,” Yunho whispered. “On my shoulders.”
Yoochun’s hands were shaking too.
Yunho hoped his breath did not sound as loud in his ears or that Yoochun could hear his heart thumping.
“Hyung, I can’t--”
“First lean down,” Yunho interrupted because no way in hell was he going to stop this now, not with what he’d wanted for at least few years in between his legs. “Shut your eyes.”
Yoochun’s long lashes batted shut and Yunho moved his head up.
“Tilt your head,” Yunho said even softer, almost touching Yoochun’s lips. His own eyes shut as he covered that small distance, doing nothing more than pressing their lips together. Soft, gentle. Yunho was sure he fell asleep at his desk, and this was a dream. Completely impossible.
Yoochun pulled away, eyes shut, chest heaving.
Yunho fought the urge to yank him back, just squeezing his hips instead. “Good?” Yunho asked, voice a bit huskier than normal.
Yoochun nodded, eyes fluttering open.
“Another? For practice?” Yunho said, smirking a little.
Yoochun licked his lips and Yunho took a quick breath before lifting his head again for lips, open in a gasp and Yunho just kissed, pulled a little too hard on his hips and let his lips move, let him kiss Yoochun as if it was their eight hundredth instead of only their second. If Yunho’s dreams counted, the numbers were in the thousands.
Yoochun pushed forward with an eager noise and his arms went around Yunho’s neck, a hand to the back of his head. Yunho gave in and pulled Yoochun sideways a bit, until he was sitting on Yunho’s thigh, in his lap, turned just enough for their lips to stay together. Yunho kept one hand around his waist and the other went up into his hair.
Yoochun followed him well. Kiss after kiss, and when Yunho could no longer wait, tongue after tongue. But still soft, still gentle. He did not want Yoochun to run away from him, not after this. He stopped kissing Yoochun when his hand was on its way up the back of the kid’s shirt.
He pulled away, gasping, head tilted back, eyes shut.
Fingers danced down his neck, and he shivered.
“Did I do okay?” Yoochun asked.
Yunho opened an eye and nodded. “You’re a natural. Not that I’m surprised.”
“What does that mean?”
Yunho shook his head. He did not know how to explain to Yoochun that Yoochun just oozed sensuality, he always had, and that had never helped Yunho’s lingering crush on the boy.
Yoochun shifted, and Yunho gasped in surprise when lips touched his again, and he shifted up, enough to pull Yoochun as close as possible, and he let Yoochun lead this kiss, lead the dance of tongues. When he tried to speed up, Yunho slowed them back down, showing Yoochun how to kiss deeply without making it messy.
What better way to teach than by example?
Yoochun tangled fingers in his hair, and Yunho moaned, surging for more. Yoochun meeped, but did not break from the kiss.
They kissed until Yunho’s leg went numb, and he shifted with a wince that finally had Yoochun pulling away.
“My leg, bony ass.”
Yoochun smiled and stood up. Yunho pouted in protest, but Yoochun only moved to his desk, gripping the front of Yunho’s shirt and pulling on it. Yunho followed the pull, to his feet, curling over Yoochun as he sat on the desk and hooked his ankles around Yunho’s knees. His hand went right back to Yunho’s hair and he yanked his head down, and Yunho let himself be kissed.
Yunho knew that the kiss had gone beyond teaching.
But Yoochun kept kissing him.
And Yunho was not going to stop.
And then there was a knock on his door, and Yunho jumped away from Yoochun fast enough that his chair rolled across the floor for a moment before toppling over from the exertion.
Yoochun laughed, and the door opened.
His mom peered around the corner, and Yunho hurried to right the chair, hoping the angle hid his obvious erection. “Aren’t you two a little old for rough housing?”
Yoochun laughed again. “His fault. He’s such a braggart. Gone for a couple years and comes back with muscles and he thinks he’s infallible.”
His mom chuckled. “I just came up to tell you that dinner is ready. Are you staying?”
Yoochun shook his head. “Not today. Mom should be home tonight, so I better get back over there before Yoohwan is home from school.”
“Okay. Yunho, wash up and come down for dinner.”
Yunho rubbed the back of his neck and nodded. “Be right down.”
She shut the door and Yunho groaned, fell into the chair and buried his face in his hands.
Yoochun laughed. “How old are you?”
“Shut up.”
Yunho stiffened when Yoochun’s hands ran up and down his back, fingers tickling his neck.
“Thanks, hyung.” He kissed the back of his neck, and Yunho was so intune with him, that he felt just how Yoochun’s lips opened against skin in a soft, light touch that had his cock throbbing. “See you tomorrow?”
Yunho cleared his throat. “Yeah.”
He did not turn to watch Yoochun leave his room, because if had, he would have pulled the boy to his bed and not let him up until they were both covered in come.
Yunho moaned and unfastened his pants. He pushed them down enough to free his cock, and bit down on his hand to muffle his moans as he stroked himself off.
---
Yunho had a hard time looking at Yoochun without blushing, without looking away, without picturing his plump lips against his and on his skin.
Without pinning him to the nearest surface and kissing the breath from his lungs.
But Sunday he could not ignore Yoochun any longer without his mother wondering what was up. Sunday had always been their day, to walk around the neighborhood, drive to the beach when Yunho bought a piece-of-shit car, go out for coffee, dinner, lunch. In his mind, Yunho called it his Yoochun Date Day.
“Let’s go to the beach today,” Yoochun said and knocked his shoulder into Yunho’s.
Aware of his mother standing right there, Yunho knew he could not refuse. “Yeah, okay.”
“We don’t have--”
“No, it’s fine,” Yunho said even though he’d hoped that Yoochun just wanted to stay in. Yunho was less likely to jump him when he knew his mom was in the same house. “I’ll go get ready.”
He left the kitchen, hurrying his steps, but not enough to miss hearing his mother say, “He’s been a bit cranky the last couple days. Not sure why. Probably college stress.”
He did not hear Yoochun’s response.
Yoochun knew why he was cranky. He hoped.
Maybe.
But even if Yoochun knew, it had just been a kiss. Just a kiss. After changing into board shorts and a sleeveless T-shirt, Yunho went back down stairs.
Yoochun waited for him at the bottom of the stairs, a cooler in his hands.
Yunho reached for it.
“I got it,” Yoochun said and pulled it away.
It looked heavy, and Yunho bit his lip in concern, but he also knew that Yoochun’s skinnier body upset the boy, so he opened the door for Yoochun and followed behind him. He said nothing as they packed the cooler into the back seat and climbed into the car.
Yoochun turned the radio station to jazz, something that Yunho didn’t really like, but let Yoochun program a button for anyway. Normally he complained, but he stayed silent.
They were a good ten minutes into the drive to the beach before Yoochun asked, “Can we go to the river instead?”
Yunho sighed. The beach meant people. The river meant exclusion. Usually. It was a longer drive, and a spot that Yoochun had directed Yunho to about four years ago. He had only said, “I used to live around there.”
Yunho took the next exit and headed toward the river.
After a few more minutes of silence, Yoochun huffed, put his feet up on the dash, and pulled out his phone.
Yunho winced. He thought of normal questions he usually asked Yoochun, like about school or Yoohwan, but everything sounded ... fake to his own ears. And he knew that Yoochun would think the same thing.
Or he thought so.
Maybe Yoochun really did think that there was something wrong with Yunho that had nothing to do with the kiss. Maybe Yunho had turned it into a big deal in his head, mainly because of his fucking inappropriate crush on a teenager, and Yoochun thought of it as just a kiss.
Either way, he had to talk about it.
They had to talk about it.
It was not fair to Yoochun at all.
But still he could not say a single thing to him.
An hour later, Yunho pulled the car to a stop on the side of a road that was barely pavement anymore. Yoochun climbed out of the car before Yunho turned it off. He headed down a trail that was barely there, and Yunho sighed. He rested his head against the steering wheel for a moment before following after Yoochun. He took a few steps, remembered the cooler, and hefted it out of the car. Yoochun was no longer in sight.
Yunho traveled the familiar path and was not surprised to find Yoochun resting against the trunk of a large tree that had fallen years ago.
There were houses below this spot and houses above it, but for some reason, no developers had changed this small bend in a river into someone’s paradise.
Yunho put the cooler down and leaned against the log. Normally he would have sat much closer to Yoochun.
“Is this about the kiss?”
Yunho did not react.
Yoochun sighed. “Fuck, hyung. It was just a kiss.”
“I know,” Yunho said.
“If I had known you were going to ignore me and treat me like a stranger, I never would have done it. What is wrong with you?”
“Nothing--”
“Bull shit.”
Yoochun was never so disrespectful. Yunho found that he could not protest.
He rubbed the back of his neck.
“Can you at least look at me when you lie to my face?”
Yunho glanced over at him, at the way the sunlight cut through the trees, how it shimmered on his hair, and made his pale skin glow. With a harsh noise, he turned away.
“Fuck you, hyung,” Yoochun said, and his voice broke.
Yunho heard him get up.
“It was just a kiss,” Yoochun muttered and walked away.
Yunho watched him, and then said, “What if it wasn’t?”
Yoochun stopped and turned. “What?”
He was right. Yoochun was right. Yunho had been treating him like shit. And he didn’t want to anymore. So he had to explain, because as soon as he explained ...
Confessed ...
... as soon as he confessed, they’d either go back to the way things were, or they wouldn’t talk anymore. They were both young, right? They could find love elsewhere, maybe? Right?
“What if it wasn’t just a kiss?” Yunho asked. Whispered.
Yoochun walked back toward him. “What do you mean?”
“It wasn’t just a kiss,” Yunho said and swallowed. “Not for me, and I ... if it was just a kiss for you, then okay, but I can’t ... I can’t look at you without wanting another one. I can’t even ... You’re too young, and I ... I was going to explain ... kiss you ... before, I left, the army, and you ... were hugging me, and I wanted to kiss you and tell you how ... but I couldn’t, I couldn’t do that and then just leave for two years, and then you grew up and you were popular and you ... you ... are irresistible, really, and that wasn’t fair, and you’re too young, and I’m supposed to take care of you.”
Yunho had hoped that as he talked, Yoochun would have stopped walking toward him, but he didn’t, coming right up to him where he leaned on the tree, and then between Yunho’s legs. His hands went to Yunho’s cheeks, tilting his head up, and then Yunho’s words were muffled by lips and tongue. A demanding deep kiss that had his skin sizzling and his head light. His vision shimmered before his eyes shut. He pulled Yoochun closer, arms around his waist.
And just like Yunho taught him, Yoochun slowed the kiss down, softened the grip he had on Yunho’s cheeks.
“So,” Yoochun said, lips moving against Yunho’s as he talked. “You like me and thought it was a good idea to treat me like shit because you like me?”
Yunho whimpered. “I’m ... sorry. I--” He broke away from Yoochun’s lips and pressed his face to his chest instead, trying to control his breathing.
Yoochun chuckled, running his hands over Yunho’s shoulders and into his hair. “You’re only four years older than me. That’s not a very big age gap at all. Especially later, when you’re twenty-eight and I’m twenty-four.”
“Yeah, well, I can’t get in trouble when you’re twenty-four.”
Yoochun yanked Yunho’s head back by his hair. A soft grip, but one that still had Yunho shaking a little. “You’re dumb. I’ll be eighteen in June, you’re going to college next year, I’m going to the military, and then college, and then--”
Yunho growled. “Stop talking. Stop reminding me that I’m going to have to live without you again.”
Yoochun blushed, actually blushed and then released him. Just enough to sit on the log, throw his feet up on it and lean against Yunho. Yunho wrapped his arms around him, pulling him tight against his chest, one hand sliding to his hip, the other staying in a relatively safe spot on his chest, though Yunho could feel the bump of a nipple. He pressed his face and then his lips to Yoochun’s neck.
“Before the kiss,” Yoochun said, “I was thinking about what it would be like to have a boyfriend. I see couples around school all the time, and I thought about how nice that would be. And then as I thought about it more, I realized that I had that with you. I wasn’t sure how having a boyfriend would be different. Except that we’d kiss and stuff.”
Yunho snorted. “And stuff.”
“Shut up, hyung.”
Yunho chuckled and used his lips to tug on Yoochun’s earlobe.
“But then I realized that there was no way that you could like me like that and that ... well, it was just this fleeting thought that I dismissed because you’re ... you’re my best friend, hyung. And then the next week, I was like, who better to kiss me than you, and I thought about the boyfriend thing the next day and then you were treating me like shit, so I didn’t think about it again.”
Yunho held him a little tighter, resting his head on top of Yoochun’s.
“You like me?” Yoochun whispered.
Yunho nodded. “A lot. More than I should.”
Yoochun snorted. “Wow. Thanks.”
“You know what I mean.”
Yoochun suddenly twisted, one leg flung over Yunho’s and the other behind him, wrapped around him. “I do know what you mean. Kiss me.”
“Whenever you want,” Yunho whispered and kissed him. He kept it soft, even if he really wanted to shove his tongue into Yoochun’s throat and lower him to the log and frot against him until they were both breathless. He did let himself slip his hands up the back of Yoochun’s shirt, flat but with a firm press into his muscles.
“Should we eat the food your mom packed for us?” Yoochun asked.
Yunho pulled away from him with difficulty. He hadn’t eaten all day, nor ate well the last few days. He was definitely ready to start pulling Yoochun’s clothes off in their own bit of paradise, but Yoochun obviously wasn’t. That was going to take time. Time that Yunho was willing to give him.
He cleared his throat and nodded. “Yeah. And then let’s go swimming.”
As always, Yoochun’s smile shined brighter than the sun.
Please do not use this fic as a way to talk about the current allegations against Yoochun.
.
Pairing: Yunho/Yoochun
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: They are not mine to teach how to kiss.
Summary: Yoochun is Yunho's neighbor, definitely his best friend, despite the age difference. Can a kiss ruin everything?
Warning: Yunho is 21, Yoochun is 17
Please do not use this fic as a way to talk about the current allegations against Yoochun.
Yunho had just a few more edits, a few more lines, to write on this last college application. He heard his door open, but did not turn to see who it was. He knew who it was. He had to concentrate.
A few minutes later, a deep sigh echoed through the room.
And then another one.
He smiled, typing a few more words. “How many times are you going to sigh before you finally tell me what is bothering you?” He spared a glance at his bed and wished he hadn’t.
Park Yoochun had been his neighbor for the last ten years, since Yunho was eleven years old and Yoochun seven years old. They were four years apart, but they were practically best friends. Yoochun’s mother worked hard to support their small family of three, and Yoochun and his little brother Yoohwan had always spent most of their time after school at Yunho’s house.
At seventeen, Park Yoochun was almost done with high school. He was in his uniform: khakis, white shirt, wrinkled jacket. Yunho supposed the tie had already been shoved into his backpack, the one currently lying almost in the middle of his floor. Yoochun was very neat, very clean, just the fact that he’d thrown the bag down and not bothered to put it on a chair or desk or neatly against the wall had Yunho worried.
Mostly worried.
Yoochun was sprawled out, arms above his head, one foot still on the floor, the other bent at the knee. His bare toes were tightened on the bedspread. His shirt was bunched a bit too high, showing a pale expanse of skin at his hips.
Yunho swallowed and said, “What?” It came out a little too harsh, and Yoochun pouted and turned away from him, curling up in a ball.
“Nothing,” he muttered. “I know you’re trying--”
Yunho scoffed and quickly saved his essay. It was almost done. He’d finish it later. He went to the bed and sat down, just behind Yoochun. He kept his hands to himself.
Yoochun huffed again.
“All right, dongsaeng. Talk.”
“It’s embarrassing.”
“Says the boy who peed in my--”
“Yah! Shut up!” Yoochun said and turned around to shove him away.
Yunho laughed and tugged on his arm. “Come on, you can tell me anything. You know that.”
Yoochun bit his lip and shook his head. He pulled one of Yunho’s pillows to his face and screamed into it.
Now, really worried, Yunho shifted around until he had his back to the wall and his arms around Yoochun’s body. Instead of the pillow, Yoochun pressed his face to Yunho’s thigh, his body shaking. Yunho was not sure if Yoochun was crying. He rubbed Yoochun’s shoulder..
“I’m really glad you’re home from the army,” Yoochun murmured, his hand tightening on Yunho’s leg, just above his knee.
Holding his breath, Yunho let himself play with Yoochun’s long hair. He was really glad he was home too. He’d only seen Yoochun during his leave. “They’re going to make you cut your hair.”
Yoochun snorted. “In a couple years. Not until I have to.”
“Tell me what’s wrong.”
Yoochun shifted again until he was laying on his back, head on Yunho’s thigh. Again one foot was straight, hanging off the edge of the bed. The other was bent, toes curling into the blanket. Yunho’s fingers strayed to Yoochun’s neck before he realized what he was doing and then he snatched them back.
Yoochun lay there with his eyes shut (good because it let Yunho just look at him) and his lips in a pout. A very tempting, beautiful pout with a plump lower lip, shining from Yoochun sucking it into his mouth. The white shirt was askew, a few buttons straining, revealing more pale skin. And it was pulled up higher, showing Yoochun’s flat stomach, belly button, hips.
Yunho shut his eyes for a few breaths of tight control.
“I want to be kissed,” Yoochun finally said, just blurting it out.
Yunho choked on his own spit and stared down at Yoochun. He still had his eyes shut. “What?”
Yoochun growled and sat up suddenly, running his hands through his hair. “Kissed. You know. Lips together. Two people.”
“You haven’t ...” Yunho trailed off, in awe. Yoochun was a popular boy at his school. Girls came over to his house often to talk to him and ask him out.
Yoochun huffed. “No. And I want to.”
“I’m sure there are lots of girls more than willing--”
Yoochun turned to him, face serious, and met his eyes. “No girls.”
And it all just suddenly made sense. It was this talk. This moment. Yunho had flying hopes that Yoochun liked boys, had fantasies of convincing him. But Yoochun was only seventeen.
“Okay, then boys,” Yunho managed to say. “I’m sure there are lots of boys--”
Yoochun sighed, pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around his legs. He shook his head. “There aren’t. They don’t ... no one in my class will admit to liking boys.”
“That makes things difficult.”
“I just feel so lame,” Yoochun continued. “It’s like everyone else has been kissed but me, and I don’t really expect more than that, but god, just a kiss! You had your first kiss when you were thirteen!”
Yunho smiled. “You just need to be patient.”
“I’m tired of being patient.”
Their eyes met again, and Yunho fought not to swallow.
Yoochun smiled. Slow, a bit greasy. He was not innocent or naive. Yunho knew that. And as Yoochun slowly unwound, turning toward him, Yunho knew just what he was going to propose.
Yunho pushed off the bed. “No way.”
“Hyung!”
“No.”
“Why not?”
Yunho sat back down on his computer and pulled up his essay. “Not going to happen.”
“Come on,” Yoochun said and followed after him, just to the edge of the bed, where he kneeled, hands on his knees. “You’ve kissed boys before, and it’s just a kiss. I want to know what it’s like.”
Yoochun had no idea that it would be so much more than a kiss to Yunho.
“No. You’re too young for me.”
Yoochun snorted. “Did you just hear me confess my undying love? No. I just want a kiss.”
“It’s weird.”
“Why?”
Yunho’s hands shook on the keyboard. “Because ... you’re ... you ... it’s just weird.”
“I’m not sure if I should be insulted or not. It’s just a kiss.”
“No.”
“Please.”
Yunho made the mistake of looking over at him. At that pout. The wide eyes. The look that Yunho had never been able to say no to. The gleam in Yoochun’s eyes meant that Yoochun knew he won.
Yunho sighed again and shook his head. “You’re ...”
“It’s just a kiss.”
“Fine. But not on the bed. Come over here.”
Yoochun vaulted from the bed with a victorious noise.
“Don’t sound so pleased with yourself,” Yunho muttered.
“You always give me what I want.”
Yunho stuck his tongue out at him.
Laughing, Yoochun moved closer and Yunho spread his legs in the chair to make room for him. He bit his lip, and Yunho smiled.
“Well?” Yunho said.
“I have ... but you need ... but ...”
Yunho laughed.
“Shut up, hyung. What do I do?”
“Kiss me.” Yunho puckered his lips in an exaggerated pout.
“Hyung!” Yoochun said and put his hand on Yunho’s face and pushed.
Yunho chuckled. “First of all, you need to come closer.” He really hoped that Yoochun did not notice how much his hands were shaking when he settled them on his hips and pulled him until his knees bumped the chair. “And now kiss me.”
“H-how?” Yoochun sucked his lip into his mouth, suddenly nervous and Yunho’s head went light with the effort to keep from moaning.
“Hands,” Yunho whispered. “On my shoulders.”
Yoochun’s hands were shaking too.
Yunho hoped his breath did not sound as loud in his ears or that Yoochun could hear his heart thumping.
“Hyung, I can’t--”
“First lean down,” Yunho interrupted because no way in hell was he going to stop this now, not with what he’d wanted for at least few years in between his legs. “Shut your eyes.”
Yoochun’s long lashes batted shut and Yunho moved his head up.
“Tilt your head,” Yunho said even softer, almost touching Yoochun’s lips. His own eyes shut as he covered that small distance, doing nothing more than pressing their lips together. Soft, gentle. Yunho was sure he fell asleep at his desk, and this was a dream. Completely impossible.
Yoochun pulled away, eyes shut, chest heaving.
Yunho fought the urge to yank him back, just squeezing his hips instead. “Good?” Yunho asked, voice a bit huskier than normal.
Yoochun nodded, eyes fluttering open.
“Another? For practice?” Yunho said, smirking a little.
Yoochun licked his lips and Yunho took a quick breath before lifting his head again for lips, open in a gasp and Yunho just kissed, pulled a little too hard on his hips and let his lips move, let him kiss Yoochun as if it was their eight hundredth instead of only their second. If Yunho’s dreams counted, the numbers were in the thousands.
Yoochun pushed forward with an eager noise and his arms went around Yunho’s neck, a hand to the back of his head. Yunho gave in and pulled Yoochun sideways a bit, until he was sitting on Yunho’s thigh, in his lap, turned just enough for their lips to stay together. Yunho kept one hand around his waist and the other went up into his hair.
Yoochun followed him well. Kiss after kiss, and when Yunho could no longer wait, tongue after tongue. But still soft, still gentle. He did not want Yoochun to run away from him, not after this. He stopped kissing Yoochun when his hand was on its way up the back of the kid’s shirt.
He pulled away, gasping, head tilted back, eyes shut.
Fingers danced down his neck, and he shivered.
“Did I do okay?” Yoochun asked.
Yunho opened an eye and nodded. “You’re a natural. Not that I’m surprised.”
“What does that mean?”
Yunho shook his head. He did not know how to explain to Yoochun that Yoochun just oozed sensuality, he always had, and that had never helped Yunho’s lingering crush on the boy.
Yoochun shifted, and Yunho gasped in surprise when lips touched his again, and he shifted up, enough to pull Yoochun as close as possible, and he let Yoochun lead this kiss, lead the dance of tongues. When he tried to speed up, Yunho slowed them back down, showing Yoochun how to kiss deeply without making it messy.
What better way to teach than by example?
Yoochun tangled fingers in his hair, and Yunho moaned, surging for more. Yoochun meeped, but did not break from the kiss.
They kissed until Yunho’s leg went numb, and he shifted with a wince that finally had Yoochun pulling away.
“My leg, bony ass.”
Yoochun smiled and stood up. Yunho pouted in protest, but Yoochun only moved to his desk, gripping the front of Yunho’s shirt and pulling on it. Yunho followed the pull, to his feet, curling over Yoochun as he sat on the desk and hooked his ankles around Yunho’s knees. His hand went right back to Yunho’s hair and he yanked his head down, and Yunho let himself be kissed.
Yunho knew that the kiss had gone beyond teaching.
But Yoochun kept kissing him.
And Yunho was not going to stop.
And then there was a knock on his door, and Yunho jumped away from Yoochun fast enough that his chair rolled across the floor for a moment before toppling over from the exertion.
Yoochun laughed, and the door opened.
His mom peered around the corner, and Yunho hurried to right the chair, hoping the angle hid his obvious erection. “Aren’t you two a little old for rough housing?”
Yoochun laughed again. “His fault. He’s such a braggart. Gone for a couple years and comes back with muscles and he thinks he’s infallible.”
His mom chuckled. “I just came up to tell you that dinner is ready. Are you staying?”
Yoochun shook his head. “Not today. Mom should be home tonight, so I better get back over there before Yoohwan is home from school.”
“Okay. Yunho, wash up and come down for dinner.”
Yunho rubbed the back of his neck and nodded. “Be right down.”
She shut the door and Yunho groaned, fell into the chair and buried his face in his hands.
Yoochun laughed. “How old are you?”
“Shut up.”
Yunho stiffened when Yoochun’s hands ran up and down his back, fingers tickling his neck.
“Thanks, hyung.” He kissed the back of his neck, and Yunho was so intune with him, that he felt just how Yoochun’s lips opened against skin in a soft, light touch that had his cock throbbing. “See you tomorrow?”
Yunho cleared his throat. “Yeah.”
He did not turn to watch Yoochun leave his room, because if had, he would have pulled the boy to his bed and not let him up until they were both covered in come.
Yunho moaned and unfastened his pants. He pushed them down enough to free his cock, and bit down on his hand to muffle his moans as he stroked himself off.
---
Yunho had a hard time looking at Yoochun without blushing, without looking away, without picturing his plump lips against his and on his skin.
Without pinning him to the nearest surface and kissing the breath from his lungs.
But Sunday he could not ignore Yoochun any longer without his mother wondering what was up. Sunday had always been their day, to walk around the neighborhood, drive to the beach when Yunho bought a piece-of-shit car, go out for coffee, dinner, lunch. In his mind, Yunho called it his Yoochun Date Day.
“Let’s go to the beach today,” Yoochun said and knocked his shoulder into Yunho’s.
Aware of his mother standing right there, Yunho knew he could not refuse. “Yeah, okay.”
“We don’t have--”
“No, it’s fine,” Yunho said even though he’d hoped that Yoochun just wanted to stay in. Yunho was less likely to jump him when he knew his mom was in the same house. “I’ll go get ready.”
He left the kitchen, hurrying his steps, but not enough to miss hearing his mother say, “He’s been a bit cranky the last couple days. Not sure why. Probably college stress.”
He did not hear Yoochun’s response.
Yoochun knew why he was cranky. He hoped.
Maybe.
But even if Yoochun knew, it had just been a kiss. Just a kiss. After changing into board shorts and a sleeveless T-shirt, Yunho went back down stairs.
Yoochun waited for him at the bottom of the stairs, a cooler in his hands.
Yunho reached for it.
“I got it,” Yoochun said and pulled it away.
It looked heavy, and Yunho bit his lip in concern, but he also knew that Yoochun’s skinnier body upset the boy, so he opened the door for Yoochun and followed behind him. He said nothing as they packed the cooler into the back seat and climbed into the car.
Yoochun turned the radio station to jazz, something that Yunho didn’t really like, but let Yoochun program a button for anyway. Normally he complained, but he stayed silent.
They were a good ten minutes into the drive to the beach before Yoochun asked, “Can we go to the river instead?”
Yunho sighed. The beach meant people. The river meant exclusion. Usually. It was a longer drive, and a spot that Yoochun had directed Yunho to about four years ago. He had only said, “I used to live around there.”
Yunho took the next exit and headed toward the river.
After a few more minutes of silence, Yoochun huffed, put his feet up on the dash, and pulled out his phone.
Yunho winced. He thought of normal questions he usually asked Yoochun, like about school or Yoohwan, but everything sounded ... fake to his own ears. And he knew that Yoochun would think the same thing.
Or he thought so.
Maybe Yoochun really did think that there was something wrong with Yunho that had nothing to do with the kiss. Maybe Yunho had turned it into a big deal in his head, mainly because of his fucking inappropriate crush on a teenager, and Yoochun thought of it as just a kiss.
Either way, he had to talk about it.
They had to talk about it.
It was not fair to Yoochun at all.
But still he could not say a single thing to him.
An hour later, Yunho pulled the car to a stop on the side of a road that was barely pavement anymore. Yoochun climbed out of the car before Yunho turned it off. He headed down a trail that was barely there, and Yunho sighed. He rested his head against the steering wheel for a moment before following after Yoochun. He took a few steps, remembered the cooler, and hefted it out of the car. Yoochun was no longer in sight.
Yunho traveled the familiar path and was not surprised to find Yoochun resting against the trunk of a large tree that had fallen years ago.
There were houses below this spot and houses above it, but for some reason, no developers had changed this small bend in a river into someone’s paradise.
Yunho put the cooler down and leaned against the log. Normally he would have sat much closer to Yoochun.
“Is this about the kiss?”
Yunho did not react.
Yoochun sighed. “Fuck, hyung. It was just a kiss.”
“I know,” Yunho said.
“If I had known you were going to ignore me and treat me like a stranger, I never would have done it. What is wrong with you?”
“Nothing--”
“Bull shit.”
Yoochun was never so disrespectful. Yunho found that he could not protest.
He rubbed the back of his neck.
“Can you at least look at me when you lie to my face?”
Yunho glanced over at him, at the way the sunlight cut through the trees, how it shimmered on his hair, and made his pale skin glow. With a harsh noise, he turned away.
“Fuck you, hyung,” Yoochun said, and his voice broke.
Yunho heard him get up.
“It was just a kiss,” Yoochun muttered and walked away.
Yunho watched him, and then said, “What if it wasn’t?”
Yoochun stopped and turned. “What?”
He was right. Yoochun was right. Yunho had been treating him like shit. And he didn’t want to anymore. So he had to explain, because as soon as he explained ...
Confessed ...
... as soon as he confessed, they’d either go back to the way things were, or they wouldn’t talk anymore. They were both young, right? They could find love elsewhere, maybe? Right?
“What if it wasn’t just a kiss?” Yunho asked. Whispered.
Yoochun walked back toward him. “What do you mean?”
“It wasn’t just a kiss,” Yunho said and swallowed. “Not for me, and I ... if it was just a kiss for you, then okay, but I can’t ... I can’t look at you without wanting another one. I can’t even ... You’re too young, and I ... I was going to explain ... kiss you ... before, I left, the army, and you ... were hugging me, and I wanted to kiss you and tell you how ... but I couldn’t, I couldn’t do that and then just leave for two years, and then you grew up and you were popular and you ... you ... are irresistible, really, and that wasn’t fair, and you’re too young, and I’m supposed to take care of you.”
Yunho had hoped that as he talked, Yoochun would have stopped walking toward him, but he didn’t, coming right up to him where he leaned on the tree, and then between Yunho’s legs. His hands went to Yunho’s cheeks, tilting his head up, and then Yunho’s words were muffled by lips and tongue. A demanding deep kiss that had his skin sizzling and his head light. His vision shimmered before his eyes shut. He pulled Yoochun closer, arms around his waist.
And just like Yunho taught him, Yoochun slowed the kiss down, softened the grip he had on Yunho’s cheeks.
“So,” Yoochun said, lips moving against Yunho’s as he talked. “You like me and thought it was a good idea to treat me like shit because you like me?”
Yunho whimpered. “I’m ... sorry. I--” He broke away from Yoochun’s lips and pressed his face to his chest instead, trying to control his breathing.
Yoochun chuckled, running his hands over Yunho’s shoulders and into his hair. “You’re only four years older than me. That’s not a very big age gap at all. Especially later, when you’re twenty-eight and I’m twenty-four.”
“Yeah, well, I can’t get in trouble when you’re twenty-four.”
Yoochun yanked Yunho’s head back by his hair. A soft grip, but one that still had Yunho shaking a little. “You’re dumb. I’ll be eighteen in June, you’re going to college next year, I’m going to the military, and then college, and then--”
Yunho growled. “Stop talking. Stop reminding me that I’m going to have to live without you again.”
Yoochun blushed, actually blushed and then released him. Just enough to sit on the log, throw his feet up on it and lean against Yunho. Yunho wrapped his arms around him, pulling him tight against his chest, one hand sliding to his hip, the other staying in a relatively safe spot on his chest, though Yunho could feel the bump of a nipple. He pressed his face and then his lips to Yoochun’s neck.
“Before the kiss,” Yoochun said, “I was thinking about what it would be like to have a boyfriend. I see couples around school all the time, and I thought about how nice that would be. And then as I thought about it more, I realized that I had that with you. I wasn’t sure how having a boyfriend would be different. Except that we’d kiss and stuff.”
Yunho snorted. “And stuff.”
“Shut up, hyung.”
Yunho chuckled and used his lips to tug on Yoochun’s earlobe.
“But then I realized that there was no way that you could like me like that and that ... well, it was just this fleeting thought that I dismissed because you’re ... you’re my best friend, hyung. And then the next week, I was like, who better to kiss me than you, and I thought about the boyfriend thing the next day and then you were treating me like shit, so I didn’t think about it again.”
Yunho held him a little tighter, resting his head on top of Yoochun’s.
“You like me?” Yoochun whispered.
Yunho nodded. “A lot. More than I should.”
Yoochun snorted. “Wow. Thanks.”
“You know what I mean.”
Yoochun suddenly twisted, one leg flung over Yunho’s and the other behind him, wrapped around him. “I do know what you mean. Kiss me.”
“Whenever you want,” Yunho whispered and kissed him. He kept it soft, even if he really wanted to shove his tongue into Yoochun’s throat and lower him to the log and frot against him until they were both breathless. He did let himself slip his hands up the back of Yoochun’s shirt, flat but with a firm press into his muscles.
“Should we eat the food your mom packed for us?” Yoochun asked.
Yunho pulled away from him with difficulty. He hadn’t eaten all day, nor ate well the last few days. He was definitely ready to start pulling Yoochun’s clothes off in their own bit of paradise, but Yoochun obviously wasn’t. That was going to take time. Time that Yunho was willing to give him.
He cleared his throat and nodded. “Yeah. And then let’s go swimming.”
As always, Yoochun’s smile shined brighter than the sun.
Please do not use this fic as a way to talk about the current allegations against Yoochun.
.