Flights of Stubbornness: A MinSu Prelude
Title: Flights of Stubbornness: A MinSu Prelude
Pairing: Changmin/Junsu
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: They aren't mine, but the Avixiary are. I want to fly with them so badly.
Summary: Junsu is minding his own business when suddenly he has a mate.
A/N: I've been meaning to write this MinSu Prelude to Flights forever. I told cerinityKS that I'd write it probably about 1.5 yrs ago. And I have lots of homework to procrastinate, so here it is.
Avixiary!Junsu
I don't know who originally made this pic, so credit goes to the owner. If you know, please let me know. Thank you!
Junsu was hungry. Blood or food or both. He didn’t care. His wings ached. His body was sore. His mind was in upheaval.
He didn’t understand why his mind wouldn’t settle on one thought. Just one.
He flew over a highway and through a rip stream. It jerked him back for a moment, and then he coasted, out and over a field. Humans were running, little black dots against the green fields, farmers out early before the sun. Junsu didn’t understand why they were so afraid. He wasn’t about to just drop down and eat one.
A couple hundred years ago, before Junsu was born, he could have, according to those older than him. But the Avixiary had signed a treaty of some sort, a treaty that said only the humans that agreed to be fed on would be fed on. Some hadn’t liked it, but it was all Junsu knew. He’d be severely reprimanded and grounded if he fed off a human without permission.
A niggling twitch vibrated in the back of his mind again. It was almost like someone was trying to call him mentally, but if they were trying to contact him, they would have just screamed his name.
Junsu needed to land. The sky was a little too gray in the east. He was almost home, but he’d left too late from Busan and needed to spend the day somewhere. The coast stretched to his west and his eyes picked up a few houses in the trees. He banked closer and then sent out a call and a request for somewhere to sleep.
Almost immediately, there were three or four voices in his head telling him he could stay with them.
But one voice, one …
Really? Can’t you plan better than that?
Junsu felt like he was knocked off course as the voice filled his mind, his heart and his soul. He lurched to the left, falling for a moment.
Molted, are you stupid? Did you just learn to fly?
Another voice told the Avixiary to shut up.
Junsu’s mind clouded over. He couldn’t concentrate, stuck on that voice, on the presence in his mind.
You have got to be kidding me. This is ridiculous. No way in hell is--
Rejection, quick and firm, tore through Junsu and he gasped out a pained cry. His wings refused to obey him and really, life didn’t matter anymore. Why would it when the voice that filled him and fit him and completed him in a way he wasn’t expecting was tossing him to the side like a rotten piece of fruit?
Molted.
A dark splotch formed in Junsu’s blurry vision. The wind ripped tears from his eyes and the splotch grew as Junsu fell. Black wings, dark against the growing night. He had no way to focus on the face or the body or anything. The figure banked and twisted, pulled up under him and caught him.
Their skin touched and Junsu cried out in relief and pain, because yes, he’d been caught, but he didn’t want to be. The Avixiary carrying him to the Earth didn’t want him. Didn’t need him.
“Hey, quiet. I’ve got you. Did you forget to fly or something?”
Junsu turned his head up, their eyes met, and those dark pools of irritation widened, and everything inside Junsu shifted and he felt it in the other, and lightning twisted through his body as their souls met and danced and they stumbled on a hard surface and the other dropped Junsu and stepped away from him.
Junsu lay on the ground, disoriented and confused, and he pushed up on his hands, eyes barely functioning, but open enough to see dark, black wings snap open and then the other was gone, and Junsu felt like half of him was leaving. He collapsed to the wooden floor of a tree house and cried until the sun came up and thankfully tore him away from the heartache.
---
Junsu’s entire body ached. He moaned, twisting his body out of the uncomfortable position. Why was he lying on a hard surface? Why were his wings so tired?
The night before rushed through him, and he sat up quickly, turning around quickly.
The tree house he was in was bare, more or less. There was only a bed and an armoire. It wasn’t very big. It was like his own at home, but his had a bookshelf and flowers and things.
Whoever lived there wasn’t there, and Junsu’s heart ached.
The niggling in the back of his head was stronger and thudded with irritation and stubbornness. It broke Junsu’s heart, and he curled up in a ball on the floor. He was still hungry, and he had to get home. He should just fly away from the rejection, fly away from the feeling of … not quite hatred. Just annoyance.
Why would he want to be with someone who was annoyed by his very presence?
Another presence came close, not the one Junsu wanted, and a handsome Avixiary with dark grey wings landed on the platform and peered in at him.
Junsu hid his face and tried not to wail in despair that it wasn’t the one he wanted to see. He’d barely seen the other’s face the night before, but just once was all he needed to remember his wide, dark eyes. His face was round, ears sticking out from his longer hair. His lips had been pursed in a thin line, but Junsu could easily imagine the other smiling at him.
Well, maybe not. He wasn’t wanted.
“Hey,” the guy said. “Are you okay?”
Junsu nodded and whispered yes, but mentally begged him to go away.
“You’ve given Changmin quite a scare,” he said.
Junsu snorted. Nothing more than a scare, nothing wanted, noting needed. Junsu’s heart broke again and he tried not to cry.
“What’s your name? Where are you from?”
“J-Junsu. Kim Clan. 1992.”
“Ah. You’re young.”
Junsu bristled and then nodded. He didn’t think the other was much older than he was.
“My name is Yunho. I’m from the Jung Clan 1890.”
Junsu whispered a respectful greeting. The feeling inside him was rolling and coiling with anger now.
“Do you really think Changmin is your mate?”
Junsu sat up in surprise. “Huh? My … that’s not … possible. What?”
Yunho snorted. “Changmin said you were stupid.”
Junsu glared at him, heart clenching that the one being he wanted to please more than anything thought he was stupid.
“Changmin is only a year younger than you. He’s from the Shim Clan 1993.”
Junsu hid his face in his hands as everything suddenly made sense. The sensations. The thoughts. The despair. The way their eyes had met, joined and melted together for that brief moment before the other had left.
Changmin.
“Oh god.”
Yunho snorted again.
Junsu crawled to the edge of the walkway and threw up. His mate. His mate was Avixiary. And … his mate didn’t want him.
He shook violently, curled in a ball.
A flare of concern bubbled up inside him and he latched onto it mentally, curling it around himself. The only positive feeling in everything that was his mate. The feeling drew closer and Junsu whimpered, and would have left, gotten away from the anticipation of seeing the other again, but he could barely move. Frozen in fear, anguish, disbelief.
Firm hands touched his wings, and his soul lurched again, yanking a strangled cry from his throat. Arms wrapped around him, lifted him up and he buried his face into a firm chest and did his best not to get his hopes up. The world stabilized. The feeling inside his soul spun from being so close to his mate.
Blood thudded below the surface of skin, and Junsu’s eyes went red, his fangs lengthened and he whimpered in hunger.
Placed on soft linens, covered by dark black wings, Junsu wasn’t sure if anything could be better than this.
Long fingers curled around the back of his neck and turned his head up and Junsu inhaled against warm skin.
Drink. I’m not going to get you to make sense while you’re so hungry, foolish hatchling.
You’re a year younger than I am. Shut up.
Junsu bit his neck and again their souls touched and lurched and he drank heavily. The blood was fresh, only a night or so old, and Junsu guzzled it until he thought he was going to throw up again. He yanked his fangs away, and the other hissed, and mentally chastised him. Junsu didn’t bother apologizing. He was too far gone, too far twisted in the feeling of his mate.
His mate.
His mate was Avixiary. This Avixiary.
Changmin.
Sharp fangs dug into his neck and Junsu cried out in pain. His back arched off the bed, pressing against the force above him and everything twisted into pleasure. The previously steady hands shook and clothes ripped and Junsu didn’t care what was happening. Everything felt good. Everything felt secure. Everything felt right. In place.
Junsu wrapped his legs around Changmin’s waist, arching into him, rubbing his erection against Changmin’s skin. Images and time burst and Junsu barely remembered anything besides the initial thrust into his body, the way his fangs buried in Changmin’s shoulder and the steady, controlled movements of his mate. Pulling them closer to release, throwing Junsu over the precipice and their voices joining and mixing.
Junsu keened as he came again, and then again almost immediately. The foggy world twisted and he was thrown to his stomach. Firm hands gripped his hips and he was penetrated again. Taken and used and loved?
Loved?
No, not loved, and Junsu whined in despair again.
Shut up. You think I can just let you go now? You think that’s even possible.
Junsu tried to take comfort in that, but it wasn’t like Changmin really wanted him.
You are … just …
Fangs slammed into the soft skin between his wings, around his spine and Junsu cried out, voice dropping to the frantic hum of submission. Changmin’s deeper voice joined, added to his. The deep hum of a dom claiming his mate echoed around them, and Junsu never felt so complete or perfect in his life.
---
A night, two nights, a week, a year.
Junsu didn’t know how long it’d been before he was finally aware and conscious of everything again. Memories of sex and blood and connections swam through his mind. It’d definitely been more than a single night. It had to be.
The air was full of the cool that came from being near midnight. The bright glow of Azure filled the tree house. Junsu turned onto his side.
The rest of the bed was empty.
But it was easy enough to locate his mate. In his heart and with his eyes. The other was standing against the railing of his porch. His black wings shivered in agitation. He hadn’t dressed, and his tanned skin glowed until the moonlight. He was tall, muscular.
Everything Junsu wanted. His soul flared with lust and need, but there was no answering call, just an influx of annoyance and a surge of that agitation.
Junsu frowned, wanting to calm his mate, but it was hard, since he was the cause of the other’s agitation.
With a deep breath, Junsu rolled out of the bed. His body ached. There were so many fang marks in his skin, the muscles were sore. Thinking, Junsu decided to slip on his jeans. It felt weird to be naked with this stranger when they weren’t in the throes of uncontrollable instincts.
Junsu softly padded out to the porch.
The other stiffened and turned his head away, so their eyes could not and would not meet.
Junsu swallowed against the rejection in his soul. He wanted to say something, or anything. Introducing himself felt a bit stupid, but really, they hadn’t really done that part yet.
Before he could say anything, Changmin turned away from him and left Junsu alone.
Junsu’s throat closed up and even if Changmin tried to hide it, Junsu felt it as if he’d screamed it. Junsu was not human. They were too young. It was a mistake.
It washed over and around and Junsu’s heart shattered along with it. Still new, still unsure, he reached to that feeling inside him and found it blocked, closed off, like it wasn’t really there to begin with and maybe he just imagined it. Without really thinking, Junsu ran across the balcony over the platform and snapped open his wings. He jumped, catching a draft immediately and falling only a few feet before soaring up and over the trees. Away. Away from what he needed the most. Everything in his body ached, but the physical pain was insignificant. He left his soul in that tree house, flew up through the night, eyes shut against the bright glow of Azure.
---
At home, surrounded by his clan, Junsu was able to forget about Changmin. For a few moments at a time. And then he’d remember and his heart would ache.
No one in his clan knew. He didn’t know who to tell or who to talk to about being rejected by your mate.
Maybe Changmin was right. An Avixiary’s mate was supposed to be human.
Junsu thought he’d hid his despair well. Thought that no one had noticed how different he was. But only a week after being home, Kim Dongwan approached him, landing lightly on his platform. Junsu barely lifted his head from the bed just to see who it was. With a sigh, he curled up in a ball, trying to calm his wings down.
“Dongsaeng,” Dongwan said softly. “What’s wrong?”
Junsu shook his head, cursing himself when he started to cry.
Dongwan was older than him by almost a hundred years. He didn’t have his mate yet. You weren’t supposed to find your mate until you were over two hundred. Junsu was still young, still … it was a mistake.
Arms wrapped around him and held him, and without really meaning to, Junsu blabbered out his story and even lifted his shirt to show Dongwan the mark of his mate, the deep bruise that announced he was claimed.
Dongwan stared at him in surprise, and then opened his mouth and shut it and then tried again.
“I know,” Junsu whispered. “I can hardly believe it. I didn’t even talk to him and he just … I … left and he didn’t stop me and,” Junsu wailed and hugged Dongwan tightly.
“It’s okay,” Dongwan tried, rubbing Junsu’s lower back, under his wings. “He’ll … I …”
Junsu swallowed and shook his head. “He’s stubborn.”
“So are you,” Dongwan said and pushed Junsu up. He wiped Junsu’s tears. “He can try to stay away but it will eat at him, and he’ll be in no better condition than you are.”
Junsu took a deep breath and turned around, resting his head on his knees and wrapping his arms around his legs. “Finding your mate is supposed to be the greatest moment of an Avixiary’s life. Why … it … I just want to die.”
Dongwan swallowed and nodded. “I can only imagine. But what are we always telling you? You’re not even a hundred yet, not even a tenth into your lifespan. If you can be patient, maybe he’ll come to you. Just keep yourself open. If you want him to see how much you want him, then don’t shut him out like he’s done to you. When he’s ready to find you, he will. He’s young, too. Remember that. He has to work this out on his own.”
Junsu sighed. “Don’t tell anyone.”
Dongwan nodded. “I won’t. But you better. When the clan leaders find out you’ve been claimed … “ he trailed off and Junsu winced.
It wasn’t going to be pretty either way. But he wanted to wait. See if his stubborn mate would acknowledge him. Until then. It was almost like a dream. Like it hadn’t happened.
Dongwan took a deep breath and patted Junsu shoulder. “Don’t lock yourself away. I know it’s painful, but we all miss our bubbly, laughing Junsu.” He left Junsu alone, and Junsu sat there, pondering that feeling inside him. That connection. He shut his eyes and mentally touched it. There was again, no answering touch, but he didn’t really care. Dongwan was right. He had to be open and accepting and ready for his mate, ready for when Changmin came to terms with it.
Junsu remembered their frantic coupling, the sex and blood and how good and perfect everything had felt. It hurt now, but then it was wonderful and the best thing that had ever happened to him. He tried to fill the connection with those feelings. Just in case.
---
Three months was a moment in time for the Avixiary.
To Junsu it felt like a lifetime. But slowly, life went back to normal.
Junsu still cried when the feelings of insecurity and rejection got to be too much. But he was laughing again, cheery and happy and playing with the other Avixiary like he had before. Every morning, before the sun claimed him, Junsu would touch that spot in his heart and soul and tell Changmin that he was still waiting. The link stayed quiet and still. He had no idea if his mate heard his whispered confessions or if he understood anything, but it was worth it.
Junsu was playing hide and seek in a thick patch of trees with the others close to his age when he felt it. His soul flared and his body stopped in the air and he had to grasp a branch to keep from falling to his death.
He lay against the rough bark, panting like he’d just flown across the ocean. He let the feeling of his mate fill him, overtake him, touch him and he cried.
The feeling shivered in annoyance and Junsu could almost see Changmin rolling his eyes at him. He laughed, giddy with relief, and then sobered as the feeling changed.
Come here.
Junsu didn’t even question it. He jumped off the branch spread his wings and flew toward that feeling. The connection did not emulate his exuberance and by the time Junsu found his mate, waiting in the upper branches of a tree, Junsu had sobered up and very carefully joined him. It took all of his effort not to fly into the other’s arms.
Changmin was wearing black pants a black shirt. His wings were folded, but the tips of them were fluttering. His wingspan was so wide.
Junsu felt momentarily unworthy and then shut down on the negative feeling.
Changmin said nothing, arms crossed over his chest and just stared at him.
Junsu bit his lip and looked down. His wings refused to settle.
“This is a mistake,” Changmin said.
Junsu swallowed and his chest constricted. He knew the other felt that way. He knew it, but it hurt to hear him say it.
“You forced me.”
Junsu lifted his head quickly and glared at him. “How is that even possible when you claimed me?”
“I don’t know, but it is.”
“Oh, and you think you’re so smart.”
“I am smart. Smarter than you at least. You cannot be my mate.”
“Because I’m not human.”
“Among other things.”
Junsu huffed and turned his face away again. “It’s not like you can un-claim me.”
“Trust me. I’ve asked around.”
Junsu sniffled and tried not to cry, failing miserably.
Changmin took a deep breath.
“Is that all you came for?” Junsu asked, turning his back on his mate.
“Stop touching the link. If you just stop then-”
“No,” Junsu said, his mind screaming that he was rebelling against a direct order from his dom mate. He lifted his head and met Changmin’s eyes again, glaring at him. “Fuck you. I’m sorry this isn’t exactly what either of us was expecting, but just fuck you. You want to cut me off and ignore that I exist, that’s fine. That’s your choice. But I can’t do that.”
Junsu spread his wings and jumped out of the tree. Part of him waited for Changmin to fly after him, but he didn’t and just a few feet from his tree house, the connection was gone, and Junsu felt heavily into his bed and cried at the sudden emptiness in his soul.
---
Two weeks later, Junsu was still in bed. He was too weak to fly and he didn’t care if he flew or not. Dongwan brought him food and let him drink from him when he had to, but honestly, Junsu didn’t want to. He didn’t care. He felt empty.
More than one set of wings fluttered and banked and Avixiary landed in his tree house.
Junsu peered out of his blankets. The leaders of the clan were there, along with his mother and his father. He found Dongwan eyes. He looked guilty.
“I told them,” Dongwan whispered. “I’m sorry.”
Junsu shrugged. He really didn’t care about anything. His mother came to the bed and touched his forehead and Junsu let himself cry.
“Is this true, Junsu-baby?” his mother asked. “You’ve been claimed?”
Junsu nodded. “Yes.”
The clan leaders talked amongst themselves for a moment, and Junsu only caught words like, “impossible”, “too young”, “Avixiary”.
“It does not matter if he is not human,” one said. “It has happened in the past and yes, they are young, but you cannot mess with destiny, nor keep a mated pair separated.”
“This is unacceptable,” the clan leader said. “If the Shim Clan Leader knew about this, the two of you would be together.”
“Please don’t,” Junsu whispered. “He doesn’t want me.”
“It doesn’t matter,” his mother said. “You need him. He’s your dom. He should be here taking care of you whether he wants you or not.”
“It’s more painful to have him here and know that than to be away from him.”
“You’ll die,” his father said. “Without your mate.”
“Then so be it,” Junsu whispered and tired to pull away from his mother.
The Clan Leaders whispered together and then one by one, they left, and Junsu curled up with his mother. He refused an offer to eat and just lay there for hours. His mother eventually left with his father, and only Dongwan was there, standing in the corner where he’d been the entire time.
“I’m not mad at you,” Junsu said. “I … I don’t really care about anything right now.”
Dongwan nodded in understanding. “I’m still sorry that I told them. I’m worried about you, and I didn’t know what to do.”
“Are they going to tell the Shim Clan?”
“Yes.”
“Now I feel like I tattled on him, like a hatchling.”
Dongwan smiled softly. “He’ll probably see it that way too.”
Junsu sighed. He didn’t care when Dongwan climbed into bed with him and he didn’t bother moving. Every time he moved, his body screamed in pain. It was hungry. But not for blood. Not for food. It needed his mate.
The next night, in a rare moment of being alone, the feeling inside of Junsu soared and he whimpered in relief and then tried to ignore it. It hurt too much to try to touch the connection. It grew closer to him, but it took almost two hours before it was in the room with him.
Junsu stayed curled up under his blanket, shivering and crying.
A long suffering sigh echoed around him, and hands pulled at the blanket and Junsu refused to let it go, screaming obscenities at Changmin.
You are being ridiculous.
Walk away you fucking bastard.
There was another sigh and then instead of fighting with the blankets, Changmin sat next to him and kept a hand on his shoulder.
It felt so good, even between layers of thick cloth. Junsu cried harder and gave in and flung the blanket away and flung himself at Changmin. He wrapped his arms around the other’s waist and buried his face in Changmin's stomach.
Changmin sat frozen for only a moment.
The feeling twisted with confusion and pride, but after a moment, he ran his hands over Junsu’s bare arm and into his hair and then shifted down and their arms and legs entwined and Junsu sighed and whimpered.
“You need to eat,” Changmin whispered.
Junsu nodded, smiling slightly and turned his head just enough to put his mouth at Changmin’s neck. Tentatively, he licked Changmin’s skin. The other shivered and tilted his head back and the feeling inside him gave Junsu permission and with a whimper of need, he bit down on Changmin’s neck and drank blood from his mate.
Changmin shivered, and in that single moment of vulnerability, Junsu felt everything he needed to know. Changmin was a mess without him. Changmin wasn’t eating well either. Changmin needed him. Changmin did want him.
Junsu doubted he’d ever get an apology from Changmin for being such a stubborn gnat, and he knew they’d fight again and Changmin would drive him absolutely crazy. But it sounded like a perfect future to Junsu.
Junsu pulled his fangs free, and pulled his head back. He felt blood on his lips and his chin and he met Changmin’s eyes, filled that connection between them with whatever love and need he had and Changmin moaned and leaned forward and their lips met in a soft kiss. Junsu tangled his hands into his mate’s hair, pulling lightly while their tongues touched and explored the other’s mouth.
Junsu was too weak to do much else, but again, he touched that feeling, picturing and thinking of being claimed and bitten. He hummed low in submission, the sound wrapping and weaving through their kiss. Changmin snagged the thought of Junsu submitting to him. He added a deeper hum to Junsu’s and let their voices join, their mated call echoing through the trees.
.
Pairing: Changmin/Junsu
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: They aren't mine, but the Avixiary are. I want to fly with them so badly.
Summary: Junsu is minding his own business when suddenly he has a mate.
A/N: I've been meaning to write this MinSu Prelude to Flights forever. I told cerinityKS that I'd write it probably about 1.5 yrs ago. And I have lots of homework to procrastinate, so here it is.
Avixiary!Junsu
I don't know who originally made this pic, so credit goes to the owner. If you know, please let me know. Thank you!
Junsu was hungry. Blood or food or both. He didn’t care. His wings ached. His body was sore. His mind was in upheaval.
He didn’t understand why his mind wouldn’t settle on one thought. Just one.
He flew over a highway and through a rip stream. It jerked him back for a moment, and then he coasted, out and over a field. Humans were running, little black dots against the green fields, farmers out early before the sun. Junsu didn’t understand why they were so afraid. He wasn’t about to just drop down and eat one.
A couple hundred years ago, before Junsu was born, he could have, according to those older than him. But the Avixiary had signed a treaty of some sort, a treaty that said only the humans that agreed to be fed on would be fed on. Some hadn’t liked it, but it was all Junsu knew. He’d be severely reprimanded and grounded if he fed off a human without permission.
A niggling twitch vibrated in the back of his mind again. It was almost like someone was trying to call him mentally, but if they were trying to contact him, they would have just screamed his name.
Junsu needed to land. The sky was a little too gray in the east. He was almost home, but he’d left too late from Busan and needed to spend the day somewhere. The coast stretched to his west and his eyes picked up a few houses in the trees. He banked closer and then sent out a call and a request for somewhere to sleep.
Almost immediately, there were three or four voices in his head telling him he could stay with them.
But one voice, one …
Really? Can’t you plan better than that?
Junsu felt like he was knocked off course as the voice filled his mind, his heart and his soul. He lurched to the left, falling for a moment.
Molted, are you stupid? Did you just learn to fly?
Another voice told the Avixiary to shut up.
Junsu’s mind clouded over. He couldn’t concentrate, stuck on that voice, on the presence in his mind.
You have got to be kidding me. This is ridiculous. No way in hell is--
Rejection, quick and firm, tore through Junsu and he gasped out a pained cry. His wings refused to obey him and really, life didn’t matter anymore. Why would it when the voice that filled him and fit him and completed him in a way he wasn’t expecting was tossing him to the side like a rotten piece of fruit?
Molted.
A dark splotch formed in Junsu’s blurry vision. The wind ripped tears from his eyes and the splotch grew as Junsu fell. Black wings, dark against the growing night. He had no way to focus on the face or the body or anything. The figure banked and twisted, pulled up under him and caught him.
Their skin touched and Junsu cried out in relief and pain, because yes, he’d been caught, but he didn’t want to be. The Avixiary carrying him to the Earth didn’t want him. Didn’t need him.
“Hey, quiet. I’ve got you. Did you forget to fly or something?”
Junsu turned his head up, their eyes met, and those dark pools of irritation widened, and everything inside Junsu shifted and he felt it in the other, and lightning twisted through his body as their souls met and danced and they stumbled on a hard surface and the other dropped Junsu and stepped away from him.
Junsu lay on the ground, disoriented and confused, and he pushed up on his hands, eyes barely functioning, but open enough to see dark, black wings snap open and then the other was gone, and Junsu felt like half of him was leaving. He collapsed to the wooden floor of a tree house and cried until the sun came up and thankfully tore him away from the heartache.
---
Junsu’s entire body ached. He moaned, twisting his body out of the uncomfortable position. Why was he lying on a hard surface? Why were his wings so tired?
The night before rushed through him, and he sat up quickly, turning around quickly.
The tree house he was in was bare, more or less. There was only a bed and an armoire. It wasn’t very big. It was like his own at home, but his had a bookshelf and flowers and things.
Whoever lived there wasn’t there, and Junsu’s heart ached.
The niggling in the back of his head was stronger and thudded with irritation and stubbornness. It broke Junsu’s heart, and he curled up in a ball on the floor. He was still hungry, and he had to get home. He should just fly away from the rejection, fly away from the feeling of … not quite hatred. Just annoyance.
Why would he want to be with someone who was annoyed by his very presence?
Another presence came close, not the one Junsu wanted, and a handsome Avixiary with dark grey wings landed on the platform and peered in at him.
Junsu hid his face and tried not to wail in despair that it wasn’t the one he wanted to see. He’d barely seen the other’s face the night before, but just once was all he needed to remember his wide, dark eyes. His face was round, ears sticking out from his longer hair. His lips had been pursed in a thin line, but Junsu could easily imagine the other smiling at him.
Well, maybe not. He wasn’t wanted.
“Hey,” the guy said. “Are you okay?”
Junsu nodded and whispered yes, but mentally begged him to go away.
“You’ve given Changmin quite a scare,” he said.
Junsu snorted. Nothing more than a scare, nothing wanted, noting needed. Junsu’s heart broke again and he tried not to cry.
“What’s your name? Where are you from?”
“J-Junsu. Kim Clan. 1992.”
“Ah. You’re young.”
Junsu bristled and then nodded. He didn’t think the other was much older than he was.
“My name is Yunho. I’m from the Jung Clan 1890.”
Junsu whispered a respectful greeting. The feeling inside him was rolling and coiling with anger now.
“Do you really think Changmin is your mate?”
Junsu sat up in surprise. “Huh? My … that’s not … possible. What?”
Yunho snorted. “Changmin said you were stupid.”
Junsu glared at him, heart clenching that the one being he wanted to please more than anything thought he was stupid.
“Changmin is only a year younger than you. He’s from the Shim Clan 1993.”
Junsu hid his face in his hands as everything suddenly made sense. The sensations. The thoughts. The despair. The way their eyes had met, joined and melted together for that brief moment before the other had left.
Changmin.
“Oh god.”
Yunho snorted again.
Junsu crawled to the edge of the walkway and threw up. His mate. His mate was Avixiary. And … his mate didn’t want him.
He shook violently, curled in a ball.
A flare of concern bubbled up inside him and he latched onto it mentally, curling it around himself. The only positive feeling in everything that was his mate. The feeling drew closer and Junsu whimpered, and would have left, gotten away from the anticipation of seeing the other again, but he could barely move. Frozen in fear, anguish, disbelief.
Firm hands touched his wings, and his soul lurched again, yanking a strangled cry from his throat. Arms wrapped around him, lifted him up and he buried his face into a firm chest and did his best not to get his hopes up. The world stabilized. The feeling inside his soul spun from being so close to his mate.
Blood thudded below the surface of skin, and Junsu’s eyes went red, his fangs lengthened and he whimpered in hunger.
Placed on soft linens, covered by dark black wings, Junsu wasn’t sure if anything could be better than this.
Long fingers curled around the back of his neck and turned his head up and Junsu inhaled against warm skin.
Drink. I’m not going to get you to make sense while you’re so hungry, foolish hatchling.
You’re a year younger than I am. Shut up.
Junsu bit his neck and again their souls touched and lurched and he drank heavily. The blood was fresh, only a night or so old, and Junsu guzzled it until he thought he was going to throw up again. He yanked his fangs away, and the other hissed, and mentally chastised him. Junsu didn’t bother apologizing. He was too far gone, too far twisted in the feeling of his mate.
His mate.
His mate was Avixiary. This Avixiary.
Changmin.
Sharp fangs dug into his neck and Junsu cried out in pain. His back arched off the bed, pressing against the force above him and everything twisted into pleasure. The previously steady hands shook and clothes ripped and Junsu didn’t care what was happening. Everything felt good. Everything felt secure. Everything felt right. In place.
Junsu wrapped his legs around Changmin’s waist, arching into him, rubbing his erection against Changmin’s skin. Images and time burst and Junsu barely remembered anything besides the initial thrust into his body, the way his fangs buried in Changmin’s shoulder and the steady, controlled movements of his mate. Pulling them closer to release, throwing Junsu over the precipice and their voices joining and mixing.
Junsu keened as he came again, and then again almost immediately. The foggy world twisted and he was thrown to his stomach. Firm hands gripped his hips and he was penetrated again. Taken and used and loved?
Loved?
No, not loved, and Junsu whined in despair again.
Shut up. You think I can just let you go now? You think that’s even possible.
Junsu tried to take comfort in that, but it wasn’t like Changmin really wanted him.
You are … just …
Fangs slammed into the soft skin between his wings, around his spine and Junsu cried out, voice dropping to the frantic hum of submission. Changmin’s deeper voice joined, added to his. The deep hum of a dom claiming his mate echoed around them, and Junsu never felt so complete or perfect in his life.
---
A night, two nights, a week, a year.
Junsu didn’t know how long it’d been before he was finally aware and conscious of everything again. Memories of sex and blood and connections swam through his mind. It’d definitely been more than a single night. It had to be.
The air was full of the cool that came from being near midnight. The bright glow of Azure filled the tree house. Junsu turned onto his side.
The rest of the bed was empty.
But it was easy enough to locate his mate. In his heart and with his eyes. The other was standing against the railing of his porch. His black wings shivered in agitation. He hadn’t dressed, and his tanned skin glowed until the moonlight. He was tall, muscular.
Everything Junsu wanted. His soul flared with lust and need, but there was no answering call, just an influx of annoyance and a surge of that agitation.
Junsu frowned, wanting to calm his mate, but it was hard, since he was the cause of the other’s agitation.
With a deep breath, Junsu rolled out of the bed. His body ached. There were so many fang marks in his skin, the muscles were sore. Thinking, Junsu decided to slip on his jeans. It felt weird to be naked with this stranger when they weren’t in the throes of uncontrollable instincts.
Junsu softly padded out to the porch.
The other stiffened and turned his head away, so their eyes could not and would not meet.
Junsu swallowed against the rejection in his soul. He wanted to say something, or anything. Introducing himself felt a bit stupid, but really, they hadn’t really done that part yet.
Before he could say anything, Changmin turned away from him and left Junsu alone.
Junsu’s throat closed up and even if Changmin tried to hide it, Junsu felt it as if he’d screamed it. Junsu was not human. They were too young. It was a mistake.
It washed over and around and Junsu’s heart shattered along with it. Still new, still unsure, he reached to that feeling inside him and found it blocked, closed off, like it wasn’t really there to begin with and maybe he just imagined it. Without really thinking, Junsu ran across the balcony over the platform and snapped open his wings. He jumped, catching a draft immediately and falling only a few feet before soaring up and over the trees. Away. Away from what he needed the most. Everything in his body ached, but the physical pain was insignificant. He left his soul in that tree house, flew up through the night, eyes shut against the bright glow of Azure.
---
At home, surrounded by his clan, Junsu was able to forget about Changmin. For a few moments at a time. And then he’d remember and his heart would ache.
No one in his clan knew. He didn’t know who to tell or who to talk to about being rejected by your mate.
Maybe Changmin was right. An Avixiary’s mate was supposed to be human.
Junsu thought he’d hid his despair well. Thought that no one had noticed how different he was. But only a week after being home, Kim Dongwan approached him, landing lightly on his platform. Junsu barely lifted his head from the bed just to see who it was. With a sigh, he curled up in a ball, trying to calm his wings down.
“Dongsaeng,” Dongwan said softly. “What’s wrong?”
Junsu shook his head, cursing himself when he started to cry.
Dongwan was older than him by almost a hundred years. He didn’t have his mate yet. You weren’t supposed to find your mate until you were over two hundred. Junsu was still young, still … it was a mistake.
Arms wrapped around him and held him, and without really meaning to, Junsu blabbered out his story and even lifted his shirt to show Dongwan the mark of his mate, the deep bruise that announced he was claimed.
Dongwan stared at him in surprise, and then opened his mouth and shut it and then tried again.
“I know,” Junsu whispered. “I can hardly believe it. I didn’t even talk to him and he just … I … left and he didn’t stop me and,” Junsu wailed and hugged Dongwan tightly.
“It’s okay,” Dongwan tried, rubbing Junsu’s lower back, under his wings. “He’ll … I …”
Junsu swallowed and shook his head. “He’s stubborn.”
“So are you,” Dongwan said and pushed Junsu up. He wiped Junsu’s tears. “He can try to stay away but it will eat at him, and he’ll be in no better condition than you are.”
Junsu took a deep breath and turned around, resting his head on his knees and wrapping his arms around his legs. “Finding your mate is supposed to be the greatest moment of an Avixiary’s life. Why … it … I just want to die.”
Dongwan swallowed and nodded. “I can only imagine. But what are we always telling you? You’re not even a hundred yet, not even a tenth into your lifespan. If you can be patient, maybe he’ll come to you. Just keep yourself open. If you want him to see how much you want him, then don’t shut him out like he’s done to you. When he’s ready to find you, he will. He’s young, too. Remember that. He has to work this out on his own.”
Junsu sighed. “Don’t tell anyone.”
Dongwan nodded. “I won’t. But you better. When the clan leaders find out you’ve been claimed … “ he trailed off and Junsu winced.
It wasn’t going to be pretty either way. But he wanted to wait. See if his stubborn mate would acknowledge him. Until then. It was almost like a dream. Like it hadn’t happened.
Dongwan took a deep breath and patted Junsu shoulder. “Don’t lock yourself away. I know it’s painful, but we all miss our bubbly, laughing Junsu.” He left Junsu alone, and Junsu sat there, pondering that feeling inside him. That connection. He shut his eyes and mentally touched it. There was again, no answering touch, but he didn’t really care. Dongwan was right. He had to be open and accepting and ready for his mate, ready for when Changmin came to terms with it.
Junsu remembered their frantic coupling, the sex and blood and how good and perfect everything had felt. It hurt now, but then it was wonderful and the best thing that had ever happened to him. He tried to fill the connection with those feelings. Just in case.
---
Three months was a moment in time for the Avixiary.
To Junsu it felt like a lifetime. But slowly, life went back to normal.
Junsu still cried when the feelings of insecurity and rejection got to be too much. But he was laughing again, cheery and happy and playing with the other Avixiary like he had before. Every morning, before the sun claimed him, Junsu would touch that spot in his heart and soul and tell Changmin that he was still waiting. The link stayed quiet and still. He had no idea if his mate heard his whispered confessions or if he understood anything, but it was worth it.
Junsu was playing hide and seek in a thick patch of trees with the others close to his age when he felt it. His soul flared and his body stopped in the air and he had to grasp a branch to keep from falling to his death.
He lay against the rough bark, panting like he’d just flown across the ocean. He let the feeling of his mate fill him, overtake him, touch him and he cried.
The feeling shivered in annoyance and Junsu could almost see Changmin rolling his eyes at him. He laughed, giddy with relief, and then sobered as the feeling changed.
Come here.
Junsu didn’t even question it. He jumped off the branch spread his wings and flew toward that feeling. The connection did not emulate his exuberance and by the time Junsu found his mate, waiting in the upper branches of a tree, Junsu had sobered up and very carefully joined him. It took all of his effort not to fly into the other’s arms.
Changmin was wearing black pants a black shirt. His wings were folded, but the tips of them were fluttering. His wingspan was so wide.
Junsu felt momentarily unworthy and then shut down on the negative feeling.
Changmin said nothing, arms crossed over his chest and just stared at him.
Junsu bit his lip and looked down. His wings refused to settle.
“This is a mistake,” Changmin said.
Junsu swallowed and his chest constricted. He knew the other felt that way. He knew it, but it hurt to hear him say it.
“You forced me.”
Junsu lifted his head quickly and glared at him. “How is that even possible when you claimed me?”
“I don’t know, but it is.”
“Oh, and you think you’re so smart.”
“I am smart. Smarter than you at least. You cannot be my mate.”
“Because I’m not human.”
“Among other things.”
Junsu huffed and turned his face away again. “It’s not like you can un-claim me.”
“Trust me. I’ve asked around.”
Junsu sniffled and tried not to cry, failing miserably.
Changmin took a deep breath.
“Is that all you came for?” Junsu asked, turning his back on his mate.
“Stop touching the link. If you just stop then-”
“No,” Junsu said, his mind screaming that he was rebelling against a direct order from his dom mate. He lifted his head and met Changmin’s eyes again, glaring at him. “Fuck you. I’m sorry this isn’t exactly what either of us was expecting, but just fuck you. You want to cut me off and ignore that I exist, that’s fine. That’s your choice. But I can’t do that.”
Junsu spread his wings and jumped out of the tree. Part of him waited for Changmin to fly after him, but he didn’t and just a few feet from his tree house, the connection was gone, and Junsu felt heavily into his bed and cried at the sudden emptiness in his soul.
---
Two weeks later, Junsu was still in bed. He was too weak to fly and he didn’t care if he flew or not. Dongwan brought him food and let him drink from him when he had to, but honestly, Junsu didn’t want to. He didn’t care. He felt empty.
More than one set of wings fluttered and banked and Avixiary landed in his tree house.
Junsu peered out of his blankets. The leaders of the clan were there, along with his mother and his father. He found Dongwan eyes. He looked guilty.
“I told them,” Dongwan whispered. “I’m sorry.”
Junsu shrugged. He really didn’t care about anything. His mother came to the bed and touched his forehead and Junsu let himself cry.
“Is this true, Junsu-baby?” his mother asked. “You’ve been claimed?”
Junsu nodded. “Yes.”
The clan leaders talked amongst themselves for a moment, and Junsu only caught words like, “impossible”, “too young”, “Avixiary”.
“It does not matter if he is not human,” one said. “It has happened in the past and yes, they are young, but you cannot mess with destiny, nor keep a mated pair separated.”
“This is unacceptable,” the clan leader said. “If the Shim Clan Leader knew about this, the two of you would be together.”
“Please don’t,” Junsu whispered. “He doesn’t want me.”
“It doesn’t matter,” his mother said. “You need him. He’s your dom. He should be here taking care of you whether he wants you or not.”
“It’s more painful to have him here and know that than to be away from him.”
“You’ll die,” his father said. “Without your mate.”
“Then so be it,” Junsu whispered and tired to pull away from his mother.
The Clan Leaders whispered together and then one by one, they left, and Junsu curled up with his mother. He refused an offer to eat and just lay there for hours. His mother eventually left with his father, and only Dongwan was there, standing in the corner where he’d been the entire time.
“I’m not mad at you,” Junsu said. “I … I don’t really care about anything right now.”
Dongwan nodded in understanding. “I’m still sorry that I told them. I’m worried about you, and I didn’t know what to do.”
“Are they going to tell the Shim Clan?”
“Yes.”
“Now I feel like I tattled on him, like a hatchling.”
Dongwan smiled softly. “He’ll probably see it that way too.”
Junsu sighed. He didn’t care when Dongwan climbed into bed with him and he didn’t bother moving. Every time he moved, his body screamed in pain. It was hungry. But not for blood. Not for food. It needed his mate.
The next night, in a rare moment of being alone, the feeling inside of Junsu soared and he whimpered in relief and then tried to ignore it. It hurt too much to try to touch the connection. It grew closer to him, but it took almost two hours before it was in the room with him.
Junsu stayed curled up under his blanket, shivering and crying.
A long suffering sigh echoed around him, and hands pulled at the blanket and Junsu refused to let it go, screaming obscenities at Changmin.
You are being ridiculous.
Walk away you fucking bastard.
There was another sigh and then instead of fighting with the blankets, Changmin sat next to him and kept a hand on his shoulder.
It felt so good, even between layers of thick cloth. Junsu cried harder and gave in and flung the blanket away and flung himself at Changmin. He wrapped his arms around the other’s waist and buried his face in Changmin's stomach.
Changmin sat frozen for only a moment.
The feeling twisted with confusion and pride, but after a moment, he ran his hands over Junsu’s bare arm and into his hair and then shifted down and their arms and legs entwined and Junsu sighed and whimpered.
“You need to eat,” Changmin whispered.
Junsu nodded, smiling slightly and turned his head just enough to put his mouth at Changmin’s neck. Tentatively, he licked Changmin’s skin. The other shivered and tilted his head back and the feeling inside him gave Junsu permission and with a whimper of need, he bit down on Changmin’s neck and drank blood from his mate.
Changmin shivered, and in that single moment of vulnerability, Junsu felt everything he needed to know. Changmin was a mess without him. Changmin wasn’t eating well either. Changmin needed him. Changmin did want him.
Junsu doubted he’d ever get an apology from Changmin for being such a stubborn gnat, and he knew they’d fight again and Changmin would drive him absolutely crazy. But it sounded like a perfect future to Junsu.
Junsu pulled his fangs free, and pulled his head back. He felt blood on his lips and his chin and he met Changmin’s eyes, filled that connection between them with whatever love and need he had and Changmin moaned and leaned forward and their lips met in a soft kiss. Junsu tangled his hands into his mate’s hair, pulling lightly while their tongues touched and explored the other’s mouth.
Junsu was too weak to do much else, but again, he touched that feeling, picturing and thinking of being claimed and bitten. He hummed low in submission, the sound wrapping and weaving through their kiss. Changmin snagged the thought of Junsu submitting to him. He added a deeper hum to Junsu’s and let their voices join, their mated call echoing through the trees.
.