Cousins 3/4
Title: Cousins 3/4
Pairing: Jaejoong/Junsu
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: I don't want to be related to them in any way, because that would just make my dreams/fantasies really awkward. I wouldn't mind owning them, but alas, I don't.
Summary: It started out as practice.
Warning: underage experimentation and sex, incest (JaeSu are first cousins)
Poster by 0xkaiia0x - thank you! It's beautiful! ♥
Part 3:
Twenty one years old:
“No, Mom, I’m fine … Yes. I have a final in three days. I have to study … Really? Well, good for him. I hope he does well … No, Mom. I’ll write to him if he writes to me, but I … No, Mom. It has nothing to do with her … They broke up? Why? … Oh, he probably is dating someone else, or just dumped her so she wouldn’t have to wait for him to finish his military service … Look, Mom. I know. I do care. I have to go.”
Twenty three years old:
“Yes, Mom. I understand. … I’ve had three interviews and they’re all unwilling to hire me until I serve my military time … I’ll have one year and twenty months to figure out my life … Really? Well, then we’ll just miss each other … Okay, Mom. Okay. I’ll call him … Yes. I promise … Hang on, let me get a pen … I’m writing his number down right now.”
Twenty five years old:
Jaejoong packed up his last bag and dragged the two suitcases from his room. His mom met him at the bottom of the stairs. They shared a smile and she hugged him.
“I don’t know what happened between you two when you were younger, but remember, that family is more important than anything else.”
“I know. It was stupid, Mom. We’ll make up now.”
His mom ruffled his hair. “And in a few months, your hair will grow back.”
Jaejoong smiled. “Thanks, Mom. I’ll call you as soon as I get to the city.” He let his mom hug him one more time, and then he opened the door. It wasn’t like he was moving far away, just a few hours to the city, but he walked like he was walking through mud. He figured it was more because of where he was headed than where he was leaving.
The cab driver put his luggage in the trunk and Jaejoong climbed into the back seat. As soon as he told the driver to go to the train station, Jaejoong put in his earbuds and started his music. It was a half hour ride to the nearest station.
He scrolled through his contacts, hovering over Junsu’s name, remembering their last conversation. Jaejoong hadn’t even let Junsu talk, just hung up on him and tried to move on.
Why didn’t you come yesterday?
I … I had homework. Entrance exams, you know.
You still should have come.
Why? So I could meet your girlfriend? No thanks.
Is that what this is about?
Jaejoong sighed and hit the button to sent Junsu a text message.
From Jaejoong: I just left my house.
From Junsu: Cool. I’m excited to see you.
Jaejoong sighed. He was excited too. Wasn’t he? Jaejoong wasn’t sure. He hadn’t talked to Junsu, either in person or on the phone, in almost six years. He didn’t reply to that message and leaned his head back and tried to get some sleep.
He bought a coffee on the train platform and put off actually going to Seoul for another half hour.
The train ride blurred. The only thing that made sense was the sexily-dressed man who sitting near him that continued to look at him and smile. Before the army, Jaejoong would have introduced himself. Now, heading to Junsu’s, he wasn’t sure if that would be appropriate.
He wasn’t sure about anything. Confusion coiled his stomach and paled his face.
Oh, god.
Jaejoong wasn’t sure what he was more worried about: Junsu wanting to start things back up again, or Junsu ignoring whatever it was they had when they were teenagers.
Both thoughts made his stomach churn with dread and anticipation.
He left the train with one more smile to the sexy businessman, and sighed when the throng of people jostled him. Part of him hated the city, but the rest of him was excited for its prospects. It was Saturday, and he had two interviews on Monday morning at the same companies he had applied to before going into the army.
A taxi driver shuffled him into his cab with Jaejoong barely uttering anything besides Junsu’s address.
Again, settled in a back seat, pop music blaring in his ears, Jaejoong sent Junsu a text to say he was almost there.
From Junsu: I’ll meet you downstairs.
Jaejoong leaned his head back, struck by déjà vu again. The difference between this half hour cab ride and the one earlier was this one only felt like thirty seconds. The driver pulled to a curb and Jaejoong handed him his payment. The driver jumped out to get Jaejoong’s bags from the trunk.
Jaejoong avoided turning his head for as long as he could, and then with a sigh opened the door and climbed from the car. The cabbie put his bags on the sidewalk, but all Jaejoong saw was Junsu.
Junsu’s hair was light brown, short and spiked into a version of a faux hawk. His body was muscled and his waist trim. Jaejoong mouth went dry. Junsu wore black comfortable pants and a tight, white t-shirt.
Jaejoong finally turned to the cab driver and bowed and thanked him.
And then he stared at Junsu some more. He was breathtaking, his face more masculine and less cute than it had been when they were teenagers.
Finally, Junsu smiled and said, “Well, come on.”
Jaejoong forced a smile back and they each took a suitcase and rolled them into the building.
“I’m up on the eighth floor,” Junsu said. “I don’t usually take the elevator, because it has a tendency to stop working every week or so, but with your bags, we’ll risk it.”
“O-okay.”
Silence fell between them and Jaejoong shifted, looking at anything but Junsu until the elevator door opened. He went to the corner, pulled the suitcase in front of him and looked down. They said nothing during the fourteen second ride.
Jaejoong hadn’t counted the seconds for a very long time.
“Are you hungry?” Junsu asked as he rolled a suitcase in front of Jaejoong.
“Yeah. I’ve had coffee today.”
“Then we’ll go out.”
“I … I can cook,” Jaejoong said. “I don’t really feel like going out.”
Junsu stopped at a door and swung it open. “I don’t usually eat in, but I’m sure I have … something edible.”
Jaejoong smiled.
“Do you want a shower or a nap or …”
“I’m okay, Su-ah.”
His shoulders relaxed at the informality and Jaejoong smiled as some of the tension dissipated between them.
Junsu scratched the back of his neck and said, “Um, I …” He looked to the side.
Jaejoong shut his eyes. The army had taught him how to be more assertive and how to speak his mind when needed. He felt that this was one of those times. Junsu always said what was on his mind. Jaejoong put his backpack on the floor next to his suitcases and then went over to the couch. He sat down and looked expectantly at Junsu.
“Sit. We need to talk.”
Junsu moved on the opposite side of the couch and sat on the arm, with his feet on the cushion. He put his elbows on his knees. Jaejoong turned to face him.
Jaejoong hesitated, trying to formulate what he wanted to say. They hadn’t talked at all about their past. Jaejoong had mentioned how he wanted to move to the city and his mom so helpfully said that Junsu was living and working in Seoul and here is his phone number and you should live with him.
Jaejoong hadn’t called Junsu, but his mother had called her sister, and Junsu’s mom had called Junsu and Junsu had sent him a text.
He’d been home from the army for less than two weeks now.
“I’m sorry,” Jaejoong said, “but I’m not sure for what. I can’t very well apologize for being young and stupid, and another part of me feels like I shouldn’t have to apologize at all.”
Junsu slid down to the couch, sitting with his legs bent. “You never did let me explain. I could have tried harder to contact you, but I was … was scared, I guess. Afraid you’d shut me out again.”
“So explain now.”
Junsu wetted his lips and talked to the side of the couch, head bent. “I met Taeyeon right after high school. And yes, I liked her, and well, you know me. I’d never kissed a girl so I decided to try it out. My mom absolutely freaked out when I finally brought home a girl, it was only supposed to be once, but … yeah, well, I thought we might need a cover story anyway, but I was too scared to tell you, and then you … well, it’s not your fault, but after, I couldn’t break up with her, and I figured that since I was going to go into the military anyway that I should break up with her, but then I put it off, and … I put it off because I was hoping you’d start talking to me again. I know I screwed up with Taeyeon. Especially when I found out that everyone expected me to marry her. But I didn’t know what to do because I couldn’t very well say that I was in love with you.”
Junsu shut up abruptly.
Jaejoong stood up and said, “Okay,” and headed to the kitchen.
“Well, wait, what … what … what about you?”
Jaejoong turned and looked at him still sitting on the couch, but with his upper body over the back of it. “What about me?”
“What’s your explanation?”
“You broke my heart.”
Jaejoong entered the kitchen and opened the fridge. There were some vegetables in there. That was a start. He felt Junsu’s presence, but ignored him as he started rice and cut up vegetables. He found soy sauce in the fridge and a single skillet in the cupboard. It wasn’t a wok, but it would work. He turned on the gas stove top and heated the pan for a minute. He threw in the vegetables, dripped in some soy sauce and let them cook for a couple minutes.
As soon as the rice cooker dinged, Jaejoong pulled the vegetables off the stove. He found plates in the cupboard and scooped out the rice. He added vegetables and then dug back in the fridge for the peanut sauce.
“Wow,” Junsu said. “I think I’ll call you Magic Jaejoong.”
Jae smiled. “I like to cook.”
“I like to eat.”
Jaejoong sat the plates on Junsu’s small table. “I’m going to have to do something about the facilities though. There’s nothing here.”
Junsu would have said something, but his mouth was full. Jaejoong laughed and nodded in understanding.
They finished eating in silence.
Jaejoong still felt awkward, but he blamed the schedule from his traveling. It was almost six.
“I guess I’m going to take up the offer of a shower.”
“Okay. I made plans for tonight with part of my dance crew. You want to come?”
Jaejoong tilted his head and really thought about it. He shook his head. “I’m too tired today.”
Junsu nodded.
“Did you tell your dance crew that I was moving in?”
“No.” At Jaejoong’s sharp look, Junsu continued. “I wanted to … I wasn’t sure if we …”
Jaejoong’s heart fluttered, feeling like it had so many years ago. “If we’re cousins or not?”
“Y-yeah. I wanted to talk to you first.”
“And?”
“And what?”
“What are you going to tell them?”
Junsu looked away and Jaejoong had the rare opportunity to see Junsu blush.
Jaejoong took pity on him. “I think you should tell them that an old childhood friend moved in last minute. It’s not a complete lie.”
Junsu swallowed and looked up. His gaze fell down Jaejoong’s body, and he licked his lips. “I can cancel.”
“No. I’ll probably fall asleep early.”
“Okay.”
Jaejoong turned and left the kitchen, trying to calm his shaking hands and fluttering heart.
---
Jaejoong felt slightly guilty as he crawled into Junsu’s bed to sleep, but not enough to go sleep on the couch. At two am, he woke up with a start, disoriented and confused.
Someone was muttering curse words in the dark.
“Junsu?” Jaejoong whispered.
“Fuckshitsorry,” he slurred. “I didn’t want to wake you up.”
Jaejoong chuckled. “It’s all right. Are you drunk?”
“Maybe a lil … litt … yeah.”
Jaejoong’s eyes grew accustomed to the faint city light permeating the curtains. Junsu was at his dresser, digging in the clothes. Jaejoong stood up and moved over to him carefully. Junsu jumped when Jaejoong put his arm around his waist.
“Come on,” he whispered and led Junsu to the bed. “I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”
Junsu was shaking as Jaejoong laid them down. “B-but I … what?”
Jaejoong laughed again. “Dumb ass,” he said and put his arms around Junsu’s waist.
Junsu sighed and snuggled closer to him. Jaejoong buried his face in Junsu’s neck. He smelled of alcohol and sweat and tangy after-hours cologne.
A harsh buzzing filled the room and Jaejoong jerked awake.
Junsu moaned and rolled over, curling into him. “I fucking hate it when I forget to turn off my alarm.”
Jaejoong laughed. He reached to the bedside table and fiddled with the alarm until it shut off. It was six am.
“Much better,” Junsu said, and was asleep again in minutes, drooling on Jaejoong’s t-shirt.
Jaejoong smiled and pressed a kiss to his forehead. He was wide awake, and in desperate need of coffee, but lying next to Junsu was better than getting up. He was in the same pants and t-shirt as the night before, and Jaejoong admired his muscles, the curve of his hips and the obvious curve of his ass. Dancing had done wonders for Junsu’s body. Jaejoong ran his hands up and down his muscled arms and back.
“Jaejoong, stop it,” Junsu whimpered and pushed his face into Jae’s chest. “Sleeping.”
“Sorry. Can’t help it.”
Junsu let out a breath and rolled over, arm over his face. Jaejoong lay on his side, propped up on an elbow. He moved his hands to Junsu’s chest and stomach.
“You’re going to make me horny and I have a headache and I’m gross and I need a shower.”
Jaejoong smiled but moved his hand away.
Junsu grabbed his wrist and opened his eyes. He moaned and shut them again. “Fuck. Let me go back to sleep.”
“Okay.” Jaejoong leaned over him and pressed a light kiss to his lips. “But I’m getting up. I’ve been asleep since seven.”
Junsu smiled and nodded. Their lips stayed together for twenty-one seconds.
“Is there a market nearby?”
“Yes. Just two streets north.”
“Okay. I’ll go get something for breakfast.”
Jaejoong kissed him one more time and then rolled out of bed. Junsu whimpered and Jaejoong looked back down at him. Junsu was curled up around a pillow, eyes half-lidded, pouting at him. Jaejoong laughed, bent down for a lingering press of lips (fourteen seconds). Junsu smiled and his eyes shut. Jaejoong made sure he was covered over with the blanket and then left to change and get some money.
The morning air was crisp, and Jaejoong decided to jog to the market. He needed to keep up his exercise routine if he wanted to keep the body he built in the army. A few girls gave him appreciative glances as he went by and he smiled at them, watching them blush. The army had given him confidence to go with his muscles.
The market was local and small. The vegetables were bright and the meat was fresh. One stall even had fresh brewed coffee. Jaejoong bought just enough food for their breakfast. Later, he would buy something from every stall and have Junsu carry it all home.
Home. He was already thinking of it as home.
Jaejoong smiled and headed back to the apartment. He remembered what Junsu had said about the elevator (he’d forgotten that morning) and he walked up the eight flights of stairs. Just another exercise. He stopped in the hallway.
There was a man knocking on Junsu’s door. He was tall, attractive in a way that most dancers were. He wore sweatpants and a t-shirt.
“Um, hello?” Jaejoong said.
The man turned and smiled. “Hi. You must be Jaejoong.”
“Um, maybe.”
Yunho chuckled. “Like you can be anyone else. Junsu said his friend was the most beautiful man any of us would ever see.”
Jaejoong blushed. “Um, thank … thank you. And you are?”
“Yunho. One of Junsu’s dancing friends.”
“Oh, welcome. Junsu is still in bed fighting off a hangover.”
Yunho rolled his eyes. “I’m not surprised. That kid cannot handle his alcohol.”
Jaejoong unlocked the door and motioned Yunho inside. “Did you have plans with him this morning?”
“No. I just always check on Junsu when he’s had too much to drink.”
Jaejoong bristled at the implication and then reminded himself that Junsu hadn’t gone home with the man.
“So, Junsu says you two used to date.”
Jaejoong swallowed nervously and nodded. “A long time ago. We lost touch after high school.”
“And now?”
Jaejoong looked over at Yunho’s teasing tone. He shrugged and started preparing breakfast. He cut up some fruit with the intention of making a smoothie and stopped to look for a blender. Luckily, Junsu had one buried deep in the back of a cupboard.
“I didn’t get enough food for three,” Jaejoong said, “but I doubt Junsu will be up any time soon. Are you hungry?”
“Sure.”
Jaejoong made them omelets with the fresh eggs and veggies and pork from the market. Junsu staggered into the kitchen halfway through them eating. He shuffled to Jaejoong, sat in his lap and downed the rest of his coffee.
“Fuck, Yunho, why do you let me drink?”
Yunho laughed. “We stopped you from ordering more, you lightweight.”
Junsu moaned and put his arms around Jaejoong’s waist and his face in his neck. Jaejoong put his arms around Junsu’s waist.
“Are you hungry?” Jaejoong whispered.
“Not for this health crap. I need greasy and salty.”
They laughed at him.
“Well, I’ll get out of here,” Yunho said, “since you have someone more important to take care of you, Su.”
Junsu smiled and rubbed his head on Jaejoong’s cheek.
Jaejoong shut his eyes and smiled.
“You two are so cute,” Yunho said. “Don’t be late for practice tomorrow.”
Junsu flipped him off and Yunho laughed and left the apartment.
Jaejoong kept his eyes shut and tried not to let his heart pound too loudly or his doubts scream to harshly in his head. This was nice, but they hadn’t even really talked since they were nineteen. And Jaejoong had to relieve the fears in his mind.
Junsu kissed his neck. “Take me back to bed. My head hurts.”
Jaejoong laughed. “Okay. Hold on.” He hooked an arm under Junsu’s knees and very carefully stood up. “So you got drunk, huh?”
“Yeah.”
“Because of me?”
“Maybe.”
The room was still dim, the blankets mussed from Junsu’s sleep.
“Do you want to shower first?” Jaejoong whispered. He tried to settle Junsu gently on the bed, but ended up dropping him. Junsu didn’t seem to care. He curled up under a blanket.
“No. If I shower, I’ll wake up. I don’t want to wake up.”
“Before you fall back to sleep, where should I unpack my things?”
“There’s plenty of room in my closet. I don’t have very many clothes.”
Jaejoong laughed. “I only brought the necessities.”
Junsu opened an eye. “Two suitcases and two backpacks is only the necessities?”
“Yeah.”
Junsu snorted. “You’re such a girl.”
Jaejoong climbed onto the bed, over Junsu.
Junsu’s breath sped up but eyes didn’t open. It made it easier to kiss him. Shaking, Jaejoong pressed their lips together. They held the kiss for only six seconds and then Jaejoong deepened it, opened his mouth and slid his tongue into Junsu’s.
Junsu sighed through his nose. His hands rubbed up Jaejoong’s arms to his shoulders. One hand hooked on the back of his neck, the other moved down his back.
“We still need to talk,” Jaejoong said after forty-four seconds.
Junsu nodded. “I know.” He pulled Jaejoong down, and hugged him tightly. “I missed you.”
Jaejoong rubbed their cheeks together. “I missed you, too.”
“Don’t let me sleep all day. Wake me up at about noon.”
“Okay.” Jaejoong pressed a chaste kiss to his lips and moved far enough away to resettle the blanket.
Junsu smiled, eyes still shut. “It’s nice to have you here, Jae.”
“It’s nice to be here, Su.”
--
Jaejoong sighed and shut his eyes as the taxi got caught in traffic again. His two interviews had gone pretty well, but both of the managers made it seem like they wanted recent graduates instead of recent army veterans. He should have gone to the army when Junsu had.
He smiled thinking of Junsu. They’d spent all day Sunday curled up on the couch watching dramas and music programs. Junsu talked about the music videos he’d been in and the concert tours he’d been a part of as one of the backup dancers of the pop group Big Bang.
Big Bang was about to release a new album, and Junsu and his crew had three weeks to perfect an original dance, shoot a video and get ready to do music shows for their new single.
The cabbie dropped him off outside of YG studios. Before Jaejoong had left, Junsu had given him a guest pass into the building and instructions on how to get to where they were practicing. Jaejoong followed the instructions and was only stopped by security once. Junsu had told him not to worry because Jaejoong was so pretty he looked like he belonged in the pop music world.
A faint bass thudded through the hall from the door. Jaejoong looked through the window at the men dancing, eyes going to Junsu.
Fuck.
He licked his lips. Junsu’s body moved fluidly, smoothly. He was lucky he’d grown out of his teenage awkwardness. Jaejoong still had a tendency to trip over nothing.
He opened the door and moved along the back wall. There were a few other people sitting watching the dancers, and Jaejoong almost froze when he recognized the guys from Big Bang.
Junsu had said they might be there. He tried not to fanboy too much. Daesung was probably his most favoritest Kpop idol ever.
GDragon looked at him and smiled for a moment, head moving to the beat. He returned the smile.
The music suddenly stopped.
“Excellent, guys,” Yunho said.
Jaejoong looked at him. He and the other dancers were walking around, winding down from the dance. Except Junsu. He faced the mirror and ran through a few choreographed waves.
“I like it,” GDragon said. “Very edgy, very sexy. Perfect for our comeback. Not that I’m surprised. Junsu-hyung, you’re always amazing.”
Junsu smiled and spun. Halfway through, his eyes caught Jaejoong’s and he stopped. “Jae!” He slid over the wood floor, half floating. Maybe that was just how Jaejoong saw it.
Junsu hugged him and then broke away. “Sorry. I’m all sweaty.”
“I’m sure he’s used to you being sweaty, Su,” Yunho said.
Jaejoong blushed as the others chuckled.
Junsu rolled his eyes and smacked Yunho. “Shut up. Anyway, Jae, these are the guys, Donghae, Eunhyuk, Shindong, Sungmin, Taemin, and Jaebeom. And I’m sure I don’t need to introduce you to Big Bang.”
Jaejoong bowed to them all and stammered something about being a fan of Big Bang.
“You’re right, Su-ah,” Sungmin said. “He’s pretty.”
Junsu rolled his eyes again, and Jaejoong blushed again. “They have been teasing me all day. I can’t take a break yet, but if you want to wait and watch, we’ll be ready for one in about an hour.”
“S-sure.”
Junsu smiled widely.
“Okay, okay. The love-fest is over,” Yunho said. “Let’s get back to work.”
Junsu swooped in and kissed his lips quickly. “Don’t get too turned on,” he whispered.
“Too late,” Jaejoong replied.
“Hm, same here. You look good in a suit.”
“Junsu!”
Junsu laughed and turned around and headed to the others. Jaejoong stared at his ass and tried not to get a hard on.
Part 4: Adults: Reconnection
Part 2: Teenagers
Part 1: Children
.
Pairing: Jaejoong/Junsu
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: I don't want to be related to them in any way, because that would just make my dreams/fantasies really awkward. I wouldn't mind owning them, but alas, I don't.
Summary: It started out as practice.
Warning: underage experimentation and sex, incest (JaeSu are first cousins)
Poster by 0xkaiia0x - thank you! It's beautiful! ♥
Part 3:
Twenty one years old:
“No, Mom, I’m fine … Yes. I have a final in three days. I have to study … Really? Well, good for him. I hope he does well … No, Mom. I’ll write to him if he writes to me, but I … No, Mom. It has nothing to do with her … They broke up? Why? … Oh, he probably is dating someone else, or just dumped her so she wouldn’t have to wait for him to finish his military service … Look, Mom. I know. I do care. I have to go.”
Twenty three years old:
“Yes, Mom. I understand. … I’ve had three interviews and they’re all unwilling to hire me until I serve my military time … I’ll have one year and twenty months to figure out my life … Really? Well, then we’ll just miss each other … Okay, Mom. Okay. I’ll call him … Yes. I promise … Hang on, let me get a pen … I’m writing his number down right now.”
Twenty five years old:
Jaejoong packed up his last bag and dragged the two suitcases from his room. His mom met him at the bottom of the stairs. They shared a smile and she hugged him.
“I don’t know what happened between you two when you were younger, but remember, that family is more important than anything else.”
“I know. It was stupid, Mom. We’ll make up now.”
His mom ruffled his hair. “And in a few months, your hair will grow back.”
Jaejoong smiled. “Thanks, Mom. I’ll call you as soon as I get to the city.” He let his mom hug him one more time, and then he opened the door. It wasn’t like he was moving far away, just a few hours to the city, but he walked like he was walking through mud. He figured it was more because of where he was headed than where he was leaving.
The cab driver put his luggage in the trunk and Jaejoong climbed into the back seat. As soon as he told the driver to go to the train station, Jaejoong put in his earbuds and started his music. It was a half hour ride to the nearest station.
He scrolled through his contacts, hovering over Junsu’s name, remembering their last conversation. Jaejoong hadn’t even let Junsu talk, just hung up on him and tried to move on.
Why didn’t you come yesterday?
I … I had homework. Entrance exams, you know.
You still should have come.
Why? So I could meet your girlfriend? No thanks.
Is that what this is about?
Jaejoong sighed and hit the button to sent Junsu a text message.
From Jaejoong: I just left my house.
From Junsu: Cool. I’m excited to see you.
Jaejoong sighed. He was excited too. Wasn’t he? Jaejoong wasn’t sure. He hadn’t talked to Junsu, either in person or on the phone, in almost six years. He didn’t reply to that message and leaned his head back and tried to get some sleep.
He bought a coffee on the train platform and put off actually going to Seoul for another half hour.
The train ride blurred. The only thing that made sense was the sexily-dressed man who sitting near him that continued to look at him and smile. Before the army, Jaejoong would have introduced himself. Now, heading to Junsu’s, he wasn’t sure if that would be appropriate.
He wasn’t sure about anything. Confusion coiled his stomach and paled his face.
Oh, god.
Jaejoong wasn’t sure what he was more worried about: Junsu wanting to start things back up again, or Junsu ignoring whatever it was they had when they were teenagers.
Both thoughts made his stomach churn with dread and anticipation.
He left the train with one more smile to the sexy businessman, and sighed when the throng of people jostled him. Part of him hated the city, but the rest of him was excited for its prospects. It was Saturday, and he had two interviews on Monday morning at the same companies he had applied to before going into the army.
A taxi driver shuffled him into his cab with Jaejoong barely uttering anything besides Junsu’s address.
Again, settled in a back seat, pop music blaring in his ears, Jaejoong sent Junsu a text to say he was almost there.
From Junsu: I’ll meet you downstairs.
Jaejoong leaned his head back, struck by déjà vu again. The difference between this half hour cab ride and the one earlier was this one only felt like thirty seconds. The driver pulled to a curb and Jaejoong handed him his payment. The driver jumped out to get Jaejoong’s bags from the trunk.
Jaejoong avoided turning his head for as long as he could, and then with a sigh opened the door and climbed from the car. The cabbie put his bags on the sidewalk, but all Jaejoong saw was Junsu.
Junsu’s hair was light brown, short and spiked into a version of a faux hawk. His body was muscled and his waist trim. Jaejoong mouth went dry. Junsu wore black comfortable pants and a tight, white t-shirt.
Jaejoong finally turned to the cab driver and bowed and thanked him.
And then he stared at Junsu some more. He was breathtaking, his face more masculine and less cute than it had been when they were teenagers.
Finally, Junsu smiled and said, “Well, come on.”
Jaejoong forced a smile back and they each took a suitcase and rolled them into the building.
“I’m up on the eighth floor,” Junsu said. “I don’t usually take the elevator, because it has a tendency to stop working every week or so, but with your bags, we’ll risk it.”
“O-okay.”
Silence fell between them and Jaejoong shifted, looking at anything but Junsu until the elevator door opened. He went to the corner, pulled the suitcase in front of him and looked down. They said nothing during the fourteen second ride.
Jaejoong hadn’t counted the seconds for a very long time.
“Are you hungry?” Junsu asked as he rolled a suitcase in front of Jaejoong.
“Yeah. I’ve had coffee today.”
“Then we’ll go out.”
“I … I can cook,” Jaejoong said. “I don’t really feel like going out.”
Junsu stopped at a door and swung it open. “I don’t usually eat in, but I’m sure I have … something edible.”
Jaejoong smiled.
“Do you want a shower or a nap or …”
“I’m okay, Su-ah.”
His shoulders relaxed at the informality and Jaejoong smiled as some of the tension dissipated between them.
Junsu scratched the back of his neck and said, “Um, I …” He looked to the side.
Jaejoong shut his eyes. The army had taught him how to be more assertive and how to speak his mind when needed. He felt that this was one of those times. Junsu always said what was on his mind. Jaejoong put his backpack on the floor next to his suitcases and then went over to the couch. He sat down and looked expectantly at Junsu.
“Sit. We need to talk.”
Junsu moved on the opposite side of the couch and sat on the arm, with his feet on the cushion. He put his elbows on his knees. Jaejoong turned to face him.
Jaejoong hesitated, trying to formulate what he wanted to say. They hadn’t talked at all about their past. Jaejoong had mentioned how he wanted to move to the city and his mom so helpfully said that Junsu was living and working in Seoul and here is his phone number and you should live with him.
Jaejoong hadn’t called Junsu, but his mother had called her sister, and Junsu’s mom had called Junsu and Junsu had sent him a text.
He’d been home from the army for less than two weeks now.
“I’m sorry,” Jaejoong said, “but I’m not sure for what. I can’t very well apologize for being young and stupid, and another part of me feels like I shouldn’t have to apologize at all.”
Junsu slid down to the couch, sitting with his legs bent. “You never did let me explain. I could have tried harder to contact you, but I was … was scared, I guess. Afraid you’d shut me out again.”
“So explain now.”
Junsu wetted his lips and talked to the side of the couch, head bent. “I met Taeyeon right after high school. And yes, I liked her, and well, you know me. I’d never kissed a girl so I decided to try it out. My mom absolutely freaked out when I finally brought home a girl, it was only supposed to be once, but … yeah, well, I thought we might need a cover story anyway, but I was too scared to tell you, and then you … well, it’s not your fault, but after, I couldn’t break up with her, and I figured that since I was going to go into the military anyway that I should break up with her, but then I put it off, and … I put it off because I was hoping you’d start talking to me again. I know I screwed up with Taeyeon. Especially when I found out that everyone expected me to marry her. But I didn’t know what to do because I couldn’t very well say that I was in love with you.”
Junsu shut up abruptly.
Jaejoong stood up and said, “Okay,” and headed to the kitchen.
“Well, wait, what … what … what about you?”
Jaejoong turned and looked at him still sitting on the couch, but with his upper body over the back of it. “What about me?”
“What’s your explanation?”
“You broke my heart.”
Jaejoong entered the kitchen and opened the fridge. There were some vegetables in there. That was a start. He felt Junsu’s presence, but ignored him as he started rice and cut up vegetables. He found soy sauce in the fridge and a single skillet in the cupboard. It wasn’t a wok, but it would work. He turned on the gas stove top and heated the pan for a minute. He threw in the vegetables, dripped in some soy sauce and let them cook for a couple minutes.
As soon as the rice cooker dinged, Jaejoong pulled the vegetables off the stove. He found plates in the cupboard and scooped out the rice. He added vegetables and then dug back in the fridge for the peanut sauce.
“Wow,” Junsu said. “I think I’ll call you Magic Jaejoong.”
Jae smiled. “I like to cook.”
“I like to eat.”
Jaejoong sat the plates on Junsu’s small table. “I’m going to have to do something about the facilities though. There’s nothing here.”
Junsu would have said something, but his mouth was full. Jaejoong laughed and nodded in understanding.
They finished eating in silence.
Jaejoong still felt awkward, but he blamed the schedule from his traveling. It was almost six.
“I guess I’m going to take up the offer of a shower.”
“Okay. I made plans for tonight with part of my dance crew. You want to come?”
Jaejoong tilted his head and really thought about it. He shook his head. “I’m too tired today.”
Junsu nodded.
“Did you tell your dance crew that I was moving in?”
“No.” At Jaejoong’s sharp look, Junsu continued. “I wanted to … I wasn’t sure if we …”
Jaejoong’s heart fluttered, feeling like it had so many years ago. “If we’re cousins or not?”
“Y-yeah. I wanted to talk to you first.”
“And?”
“And what?”
“What are you going to tell them?”
Junsu looked away and Jaejoong had the rare opportunity to see Junsu blush.
Jaejoong took pity on him. “I think you should tell them that an old childhood friend moved in last minute. It’s not a complete lie.”
Junsu swallowed and looked up. His gaze fell down Jaejoong’s body, and he licked his lips. “I can cancel.”
“No. I’ll probably fall asleep early.”
“Okay.”
Jaejoong turned and left the kitchen, trying to calm his shaking hands and fluttering heart.
---
Jaejoong felt slightly guilty as he crawled into Junsu’s bed to sleep, but not enough to go sleep on the couch. At two am, he woke up with a start, disoriented and confused.
Someone was muttering curse words in the dark.
“Junsu?” Jaejoong whispered.
“Fuckshitsorry,” he slurred. “I didn’t want to wake you up.”
Jaejoong chuckled. “It’s all right. Are you drunk?”
“Maybe a lil … litt … yeah.”
Jaejoong’s eyes grew accustomed to the faint city light permeating the curtains. Junsu was at his dresser, digging in the clothes. Jaejoong stood up and moved over to him carefully. Junsu jumped when Jaejoong put his arm around his waist.
“Come on,” he whispered and led Junsu to the bed. “I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”
Junsu was shaking as Jaejoong laid them down. “B-but I … what?”
Jaejoong laughed again. “Dumb ass,” he said and put his arms around Junsu’s waist.
Junsu sighed and snuggled closer to him. Jaejoong buried his face in Junsu’s neck. He smelled of alcohol and sweat and tangy after-hours cologne.
A harsh buzzing filled the room and Jaejoong jerked awake.
Junsu moaned and rolled over, curling into him. “I fucking hate it when I forget to turn off my alarm.”
Jaejoong laughed. He reached to the bedside table and fiddled with the alarm until it shut off. It was six am.
“Much better,” Junsu said, and was asleep again in minutes, drooling on Jaejoong’s t-shirt.
Jaejoong smiled and pressed a kiss to his forehead. He was wide awake, and in desperate need of coffee, but lying next to Junsu was better than getting up. He was in the same pants and t-shirt as the night before, and Jaejoong admired his muscles, the curve of his hips and the obvious curve of his ass. Dancing had done wonders for Junsu’s body. Jaejoong ran his hands up and down his muscled arms and back.
“Jaejoong, stop it,” Junsu whimpered and pushed his face into Jae’s chest. “Sleeping.”
“Sorry. Can’t help it.”
Junsu let out a breath and rolled over, arm over his face. Jaejoong lay on his side, propped up on an elbow. He moved his hands to Junsu’s chest and stomach.
“You’re going to make me horny and I have a headache and I’m gross and I need a shower.”
Jaejoong smiled but moved his hand away.
Junsu grabbed his wrist and opened his eyes. He moaned and shut them again. “Fuck. Let me go back to sleep.”
“Okay.” Jaejoong leaned over him and pressed a light kiss to his lips. “But I’m getting up. I’ve been asleep since seven.”
Junsu smiled and nodded. Their lips stayed together for twenty-one seconds.
“Is there a market nearby?”
“Yes. Just two streets north.”
“Okay. I’ll go get something for breakfast.”
Jaejoong kissed him one more time and then rolled out of bed. Junsu whimpered and Jaejoong looked back down at him. Junsu was curled up around a pillow, eyes half-lidded, pouting at him. Jaejoong laughed, bent down for a lingering press of lips (fourteen seconds). Junsu smiled and his eyes shut. Jaejoong made sure he was covered over with the blanket and then left to change and get some money.
The morning air was crisp, and Jaejoong decided to jog to the market. He needed to keep up his exercise routine if he wanted to keep the body he built in the army. A few girls gave him appreciative glances as he went by and he smiled at them, watching them blush. The army had given him confidence to go with his muscles.
The market was local and small. The vegetables were bright and the meat was fresh. One stall even had fresh brewed coffee. Jaejoong bought just enough food for their breakfast. Later, he would buy something from every stall and have Junsu carry it all home.
Home. He was already thinking of it as home.
Jaejoong smiled and headed back to the apartment. He remembered what Junsu had said about the elevator (he’d forgotten that morning) and he walked up the eight flights of stairs. Just another exercise. He stopped in the hallway.
There was a man knocking on Junsu’s door. He was tall, attractive in a way that most dancers were. He wore sweatpants and a t-shirt.
“Um, hello?” Jaejoong said.
The man turned and smiled. “Hi. You must be Jaejoong.”
“Um, maybe.”
Yunho chuckled. “Like you can be anyone else. Junsu said his friend was the most beautiful man any of us would ever see.”
Jaejoong blushed. “Um, thank … thank you. And you are?”
“Yunho. One of Junsu’s dancing friends.”
“Oh, welcome. Junsu is still in bed fighting off a hangover.”
Yunho rolled his eyes. “I’m not surprised. That kid cannot handle his alcohol.”
Jaejoong unlocked the door and motioned Yunho inside. “Did you have plans with him this morning?”
“No. I just always check on Junsu when he’s had too much to drink.”
Jaejoong bristled at the implication and then reminded himself that Junsu hadn’t gone home with the man.
“So, Junsu says you two used to date.”
Jaejoong swallowed nervously and nodded. “A long time ago. We lost touch after high school.”
“And now?”
Jaejoong looked over at Yunho’s teasing tone. He shrugged and started preparing breakfast. He cut up some fruit with the intention of making a smoothie and stopped to look for a blender. Luckily, Junsu had one buried deep in the back of a cupboard.
“I didn’t get enough food for three,” Jaejoong said, “but I doubt Junsu will be up any time soon. Are you hungry?”
“Sure.”
Jaejoong made them omelets with the fresh eggs and veggies and pork from the market. Junsu staggered into the kitchen halfway through them eating. He shuffled to Jaejoong, sat in his lap and downed the rest of his coffee.
“Fuck, Yunho, why do you let me drink?”
Yunho laughed. “We stopped you from ordering more, you lightweight.”
Junsu moaned and put his arms around Jaejoong’s waist and his face in his neck. Jaejoong put his arms around Junsu’s waist.
“Are you hungry?” Jaejoong whispered.
“Not for this health crap. I need greasy and salty.”
They laughed at him.
“Well, I’ll get out of here,” Yunho said, “since you have someone more important to take care of you, Su.”
Junsu smiled and rubbed his head on Jaejoong’s cheek.
Jaejoong shut his eyes and smiled.
“You two are so cute,” Yunho said. “Don’t be late for practice tomorrow.”
Junsu flipped him off and Yunho laughed and left the apartment.
Jaejoong kept his eyes shut and tried not to let his heart pound too loudly or his doubts scream to harshly in his head. This was nice, but they hadn’t even really talked since they were nineteen. And Jaejoong had to relieve the fears in his mind.
Junsu kissed his neck. “Take me back to bed. My head hurts.”
Jaejoong laughed. “Okay. Hold on.” He hooked an arm under Junsu’s knees and very carefully stood up. “So you got drunk, huh?”
“Yeah.”
“Because of me?”
“Maybe.”
The room was still dim, the blankets mussed from Junsu’s sleep.
“Do you want to shower first?” Jaejoong whispered. He tried to settle Junsu gently on the bed, but ended up dropping him. Junsu didn’t seem to care. He curled up under a blanket.
“No. If I shower, I’ll wake up. I don’t want to wake up.”
“Before you fall back to sleep, where should I unpack my things?”
“There’s plenty of room in my closet. I don’t have very many clothes.”
Jaejoong laughed. “I only brought the necessities.”
Junsu opened an eye. “Two suitcases and two backpacks is only the necessities?”
“Yeah.”
Junsu snorted. “You’re such a girl.”
Jaejoong climbed onto the bed, over Junsu.
Junsu’s breath sped up but eyes didn’t open. It made it easier to kiss him. Shaking, Jaejoong pressed their lips together. They held the kiss for only six seconds and then Jaejoong deepened it, opened his mouth and slid his tongue into Junsu’s.
Junsu sighed through his nose. His hands rubbed up Jaejoong’s arms to his shoulders. One hand hooked on the back of his neck, the other moved down his back.
“We still need to talk,” Jaejoong said after forty-four seconds.
Junsu nodded. “I know.” He pulled Jaejoong down, and hugged him tightly. “I missed you.”
Jaejoong rubbed their cheeks together. “I missed you, too.”
“Don’t let me sleep all day. Wake me up at about noon.”
“Okay.” Jaejoong pressed a chaste kiss to his lips and moved far enough away to resettle the blanket.
Junsu smiled, eyes still shut. “It’s nice to have you here, Jae.”
“It’s nice to be here, Su.”
--
Jaejoong sighed and shut his eyes as the taxi got caught in traffic again. His two interviews had gone pretty well, but both of the managers made it seem like they wanted recent graduates instead of recent army veterans. He should have gone to the army when Junsu had.
He smiled thinking of Junsu. They’d spent all day Sunday curled up on the couch watching dramas and music programs. Junsu talked about the music videos he’d been in and the concert tours he’d been a part of as one of the backup dancers of the pop group Big Bang.
Big Bang was about to release a new album, and Junsu and his crew had three weeks to perfect an original dance, shoot a video and get ready to do music shows for their new single.
The cabbie dropped him off outside of YG studios. Before Jaejoong had left, Junsu had given him a guest pass into the building and instructions on how to get to where they were practicing. Jaejoong followed the instructions and was only stopped by security once. Junsu had told him not to worry because Jaejoong was so pretty he looked like he belonged in the pop music world.
A faint bass thudded through the hall from the door. Jaejoong looked through the window at the men dancing, eyes going to Junsu.
Fuck.
He licked his lips. Junsu’s body moved fluidly, smoothly. He was lucky he’d grown out of his teenage awkwardness. Jaejoong still had a tendency to trip over nothing.
He opened the door and moved along the back wall. There were a few other people sitting watching the dancers, and Jaejoong almost froze when he recognized the guys from Big Bang.
Junsu had said they might be there. He tried not to fanboy too much. Daesung was probably his most favoritest Kpop idol ever.
GDragon looked at him and smiled for a moment, head moving to the beat. He returned the smile.
The music suddenly stopped.
“Excellent, guys,” Yunho said.
Jaejoong looked at him. He and the other dancers were walking around, winding down from the dance. Except Junsu. He faced the mirror and ran through a few choreographed waves.
“I like it,” GDragon said. “Very edgy, very sexy. Perfect for our comeback. Not that I’m surprised. Junsu-hyung, you’re always amazing.”
Junsu smiled and spun. Halfway through, his eyes caught Jaejoong’s and he stopped. “Jae!” He slid over the wood floor, half floating. Maybe that was just how Jaejoong saw it.
Junsu hugged him and then broke away. “Sorry. I’m all sweaty.”
“I’m sure he’s used to you being sweaty, Su,” Yunho said.
Jaejoong blushed as the others chuckled.
Junsu rolled his eyes and smacked Yunho. “Shut up. Anyway, Jae, these are the guys, Donghae, Eunhyuk, Shindong, Sungmin, Taemin, and Jaebeom. And I’m sure I don’t need to introduce you to Big Bang.”
Jaejoong bowed to them all and stammered something about being a fan of Big Bang.
“You’re right, Su-ah,” Sungmin said. “He’s pretty.”
Junsu rolled his eyes again, and Jaejoong blushed again. “They have been teasing me all day. I can’t take a break yet, but if you want to wait and watch, we’ll be ready for one in about an hour.”
“S-sure.”
Junsu smiled widely.
“Okay, okay. The love-fest is over,” Yunho said. “Let’s get back to work.”
Junsu swooped in and kissed his lips quickly. “Don’t get too turned on,” he whispered.
“Too late,” Jaejoong replied.
“Hm, same here. You look good in a suit.”
“Junsu!”
Junsu laughed and turned around and headed to the others. Jaejoong stared at his ass and tried not to get a hard on.
Part 4: Adults: Reconnection
Part 2: Teenagers
Part 1: Children
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