Reigning in the Flames 1/3
Title: Reigning in the Flames 1/3
Pairing: Yoochun/Junsu/Changmin (ninja!Heechul/Donghae)
Rating: This part is only PG (will be NC-17 later)
Disclaimer: Not mine, even in my own ddelusionall crazy world.
Summary: Changmin trusts no one, not after his only two friends left him at such a young age. He has his research thank you very much. But when he's suddenly pulled into their world, he has to trust them again. But his feelings and his brain don't always agree on things.
A/N: This fic is for My Haru Haru!!! harunotenshi Happy birthday my loverly darling! I hope you like it! ♥♥♥
Poster credit goes to ingenu3! Thank you darling! It's amazing! ♥
Part 1:
Changmin first met Yoochun and Junsu when he was five years old. He was playing with trucks, smashing them against each other, and then there were these two grown ups there.
“I can’t talk to strangers,” Changmin said, and ignored them as he played.
Yoochun and Junsu smiled at each other.
By the time Changmin was seven, he had two imaginary friends. They became constant presences in his life, and sometimes even went to school with him. He liked those days because the bullies didn’t beat him up for being able to do times tables in his head or for knowing that the liquid-vapor critical point for xenon is 16.6 Celsius.
He liked Yoochun more, unless Junsu asked, and then he said he liked Junsu more, but really, he loved them both. Without any siblings and with parents who did not understand him, he needed them very much.
And then one day they were gone.
Changmin was devastated. Left alone at eleven years old. He never did quite recover from the abandonment. Throughout his life, he never had any real friends, convinced they would leave him like Yoochun and Junsu had. He never had relationships other than his left hand and the blue dildo in his bedside drawer (hey, a man has needs). Though sometimes he went to a bar, or a club for the real thing. A single night. Most of those nights he drank enough that he thought he saw Yoochun and Junsu again.
Although, by the time he was twenty-four he no longer remembered exactly what they looked like. Fleeting dreams, fleeting images, fleeting moments of his heart clenching. Waking dreams. And a single, constant thought of soon.
And of course, he had no idea what that thought was for. He thought it would signify the day he’d finished his Master’s degree in Chemistry. He thought it would signify the day he started researching bio-luminescent plantlife and their healing qualities and how those could be manipulated to help cancer patients deal with pain.
But even as he did all of that, the nagging thought of soon would not leave his brain.
And he burned himself out. Working, researching, teaching, studying, learning. He loved it all, every ounce of knowledge was a gift, and he knew this, but he tried too much, too hard, too often, and was put on mandatory leave from work for three weeks.
The first week he spent drunk.
After digging around in his fridge and finding nothing but spoiled food, Changmin went out for dinner.
Less than a hundred yards from his door, a voice screamed NOW in his head and he smacked into someone, hard enough to topple them both to the ground. He couldn’t get his hands underneath him fast enough and his head smacked into the concrete.
His last thought was Well, that isn’t going to be good for the temporal bone.
☼☼☼☼☼
Changmin groaned at the pain in his head. Oh, man, he did not want to wake up at all. Nausea filled his stomach, flooded his mouth, and he leaned over the bed to throw up.
What the hell did he do last night?
He groaned again and thought he could feel his brain moving, probably trying to crawl out of his skull and get away from the pain.
“Drink this,” a soft voice whispered. The lip of a glass pressed against his mouth and cool liquid splashed over his lips. It tasted of moss and dirt and berries, and it was not unpleasant.
He tried to open his eyes and then as a forgotten vision of a childhood friend smiled down at him, Changmin decided he was still drunk and dreaming.
“Junsu left me,” Changmin muttered and then went back to sleep.
☼☼☼☼☼
The second time Changmin woke up, he knew he was not in his bed. The mattress was too soft, the linens too fine. And the blanket was deep, ocean blue. Changmin’s blankets were … plaid? striped? He frowned. He’d never noticed his blankets before.
“Are you awake, Master Changmin?”
Changmin turned his head and blinked slowly. The … creature next to his bed was short with pale blue, almost white skin, pointed ears and a pointed nose with other more obvious humanoid features.
“Probably not,” Changmin said, but his voice was hoarse with disuse and he coughed.
The creature immediately handed him a cup. With shaking hands, Changmin drank more of the earthy juice.
“And are you hungry?”
Changmin remembered throwing up and shook his head, surprised when there was no pain.
“Very well. I shall let Master Yoochun know you have--”
“Yoochun?” Changmin said, sitting up straight.
The creature smiled. “Yes. Master Yoochun. It is your bed he’s in. He’s been sharing with Master Junsu while you recovered, not that it’s been such a vast difference in the way things usually are.”
Changmin did not know what to say. Yoochun? Junsu? His memory supplied him with two figures, and he shook his head. They were imaginary friends. That was all.
A door shut quietly, and Changmin realized he was alone. This was some fucked up dream, he decided. He laid back down on the bed, fingers pinching the smooth sheets.
The door opened again, and then a man Changmin thought only existed in his mind stepped into the room. It still is just in your mind, Min. You’re dreaming.
Yoochun was beautiful. His features were round, wide, and yet soft. A dimple showed when he smiled, his teeth were slightly crooked. His cheeks were full, his lower lip plump, eyes wide with a level of happiness that Changmin had wished for all his life. They sparked with blue streaks, almost like lightning. Long black hair fell to the middle of his shoulders in a thick, braided queue.
He moved to the bed, and Changmin shrank from him until his back was against the headboard and his knees were drawn up to his chest..
“I’m assuming you have questions,” Yoochun said with a smile. He sat on the end of the bed and crossed his legs.
He sat like that before. So many times as he watched Changmin do his homework, or play with his chemistry set. All the time.
And even though his heart hammered in his chest and his usually smart, helpful brain was completely blank with shock, he wondered where Junsu was.
“Junsu, if you’re wondering, is bent over a text book at the moment trying to figure out what the hell you two did when you bumped into each other that brought you here.”
“Here. And here is?”
“The demon realm.”
Changmin’s mouth gaped open.
“Shall I start at the beginning?” Yoochun said, and then tilted his head. “No, no. That’s way too much. You don’t seem to care about the splitting of time and dimensions by the warlocks, causing a rift and an alternate … I hesitate to call it a universe, because it isn’t, not in the sense that the Earth resides in a universe. Consider it a mirror, I guess. A mirror image of the Earth, though the life is vastly different and …”
Changmin remembered that Yoochun had a tendency to ramble if Junsu was not there to stop him. It made Yoochun’s bedtime stories long, detailed and fascinating.
“Um, … Yoo-yoochun?” Changmin said carefully.
“You remembered!” Yoochun said with a wide smile, “Junsu is going to be excited that you know--”
“You left me,” Changmin said, and Yoochun frowned at the harshness of it. Changmin never did like the social etiquette in life that required him to be polite to refrain from hurting someone’s feelings. He preferred to be straightforward. And at this point, he didn’t care where he was, he didn’t care if he was dreaming, all he cared about was his broken heart at eleven years old.
“Well, we weren’t really there, Changmin.”
“You left me,” Changmin said again, stronger.
“That’s what I’m trying to explain to you. We weren’t really there, more like a mirror image of ourselves.”
“But why could I see you? Why couldn’t anyone else? Why …”
“Many of the people you see every day are people like we were. Reflecting our world into your world. It’s because you were born on the wrong side, Changmin. You were not supposed to be human.”
Changmin stared at him.
“It took Junsu and I decades to locate you. Time goes faster here than it does there. And then we were lucky and we were able to communicate with you, but not make you understand. You were young and you considered them stories and games. Our connection to Earth is volatile, Changmin. It shifts and distorts, and we did not leave you, but we lost the connection to see you. It took even more decades to find it again.”
“So how … what?”
“Straight to the point. Simple.”
“Jusnu could do it that way. I doubt you can.”
Yoochun smiled. “You are demon. We’ll have to test your magic and there’s the problem with the lack of telepathy to overcome, but …”
“Straight to the point,” Changmin said with a sigh.
“Oh, right. You are demon. We are one. Our birth was aligned with a catastrophic rift in the space between our worlds, and you were lost beyond it. We have been trying to find a way to bring you back or to take us there for so, so long.”
And then Changmin realized the voice that always whispered soon in his head had been Yoochun’s voice. A vague picture of Yoochun comforting a distraught Junsu filled his mind. Yoochun holding him, his own heart breaking as he tried his best to encourage Junsu to look again, search again. Soon, soon, soon.
His own heart and mind had chanted that, and there had always been a feeling of something missing. Someone missing. No one, nothing, not even his love of his research had filled that gaping chasm in his soul. He felt a tear roll down his cheek.
“But … but …” The biologist in him shook his head. “I have a mother and a father, how is this possible?”
“Junsu has been working out the logistics of it for almost a hundred years. Your soul was put into a human body, just like any other soul, but it was just on the wrong side of the mirror. There is nothing wrong about your human birth, or different than what would have happened in your demon birth.”
“But … then I’m human?”
“No. You’re demon.”
“You’re not making any sense at all.”
“You’re trying to figure it out with the human science part of your brain. Physically yes, you’re human, but the physicality of a human is no different than that of a demon. You are man. Consider human and demon as different species if it makes your mind understand, even though we are the same and our genetic codes will be the same. The difference is not in the physical, but the spiritual. And not spiritual in the religious sense. Human, demon, man, we are all part of the world we’re born in. One human dies, another is born. One demon dies, another is born, both formed of the same being.”
“So like reincarnation?”
“Yes, if you must put a religious term to the process. It is simply called birth.”
The door banged open. “Yoochun, I think I … Changmin!”
Changmin had only a moment to see short, bright purple hair and an amazingly beautiful smile and then arms were around his shoulders, Junsu practically in his lap.
Yoochun chuckled as Changmin froze. He did not do contact with people.They … they made him feel uncomfortable.
Changmin felt Junsu’s heart beating, felt his body heaving with tears and very slowly, he lifted his arms and put them around Junsu, tightening as Junsu cried harder.
“He’s missed you,” Yoochun said. He held out a hand, and Changmin reached for it automatically. Yoochun gripped his fingers and then moved over to him, hugging Junsu from behind, and the for the first time in a long time, Changmin was complete. Everything made sense, nothing was amiss, and he had no worries. It terrified him, but as the flare of fear emerged, two foreign feelings of comfort surrounded it and reassured it.
Junsu sniffed and lifted his head. Shining, startling green eyes met Changmin’s. They sparked with the same level as intensity as Yoochun’s blue ones.
“I can’t believe you’re here,” Junsu said.
“I … I’m still confused,” Changmin said.
Junsu smiled and rubbed his cheek against Changmin’s. “Probably, just … let me have a minute. I … “
Changmin didn’t need him to finish that sentence.
Yoochun cocked his head to the side, and Changmin felt like he missed something.
Junsu broke away from him. “You have no telepathy?”
Changmin shook his head. “That’s … that’s not possible.”
“For the human brain it’s not. Fuck, Yoochun.” Junsu looked about ready to cry again.
“Dont’ worry, Su. It’s still him. You can feel it. Look at his eyes. He’s there.”
“M-my eyes?”
Yoochun smiled. “Your eyes have always been different, haven’t they? A deep reddish brown.”
Changmin nodded.
“It’s the fire demon in you.”
“F-fire?”
“We’re worried that you wouldn’t have the same abilities as we do because of your human body, but Junsu will figure it out, because he’s the smartest.”
Changmin snorted. “I’m smart.”
“With human knowledge.”
Changmin looked at them both, determined. “C-can I … Let me help. I love research. It’s my favorite thing.”
Yoochun grinned. “Of course you can help. But you need to rest. You still haven’t recovered from the transfer.”
Changmin let Junsu lay him down. “W-what happened?”
Junsu smiled. “I have no idea. But I found myself on Earth and I thought it was just a mirror again, an image, and I saw you and ran to you and I thought I’d just pass through you, and you weren’t looking up and didn’t hear me call.”
Junsu had said Now, in his head. Changmin heard it.
“No … no … you …” Changmin tried to remember, but it was only a feeling. “A … feeling. You wanted me to look up, to see you, and I heard you scream Now, and then …”
Junsu and Yoochun exchanged a look with a smile, and then they both laughed in delight and snuggled up to him.
“Um.”
“Be quiet. We haven’t had a chance to ever hold you like this. Ever.” Junsu buried deeper against him.
Yoochun smiled at Changmin and said, “It feels good to be whole again.” He lifted his hand, a trail of light blue light swirled around his hand and the creature who had been there when he woke up poked his head into the door.
“Giyong, we are going to sleep for a few hours. Please have dinner prepared.”
The creature nodded and shut the door.
“And that was … “
“An imp,” Yoochun supplied. “Just another creature in this world. I’ll introduce you properly later. For now sleep.”
Changmin did not sleep for long minutes. He pondered the two men laying against him. Strangers and yet he felt he knew them so well. Part of him was afraid to shut his eyes, because if this was a dream, vivid crazy and created from too much to drink, then he’d wake up. And he hoped … he wanted it to be real.
☼☼☼☼☼
When he woke up, Changmin still thought he was dreaming, because he was warm, under shadows from the covers. Both of the men he fell asleep with were still pressed against him, still sleeping, both smiling slightly. He understood without being told that they were like him. They had problems sleeping, bouts of insomnia, nights staring at nothing wondering what was missing in their life. Except they knew what was missing. Changmin did not know what was missing.
And for once, the three of them slept peacefully, as they should have for the last few hundred years.
Except Changmin really had to pee. A part deep inside of him did not want to get up, did not want to be away from these two after so long without them. His bladder ultimately won, and very carefully, he lifted himself over Yoochun. Junsu whimpered, but Yoochun rolled over and they cuddled together, settling.
Changmin took a deep breath and climbed out of bed. All he wore were pants that hit his leg at mid calf. The air was cool, and the light from outside showed that it was dusk. There were three robes hanging on a hook near the door. Changmin took the red one, knowing somehow it was his, leaving the blue and green where they hung. There were no other doors in the bedroom. Carefully he turned the ornate handle of the heavy wooden door and opened it. He stepped into a long hall.
“Master Changmin.”
Changmin jumped, breath catching as he spun around. That blue creature stood behind him. All he wore was a pair of short black pants, much like his own.
“Giyong,” Changmin said.
The creature smiled. “You remembered. Good. YooSu said you might forget things easily.”
Changmin was insulted, because he never forgot anything. Except who he really was. That seemed like a huge failure on his part. But part of him still didn’t believe it.
“Um, I have to go to the bathroom.”
Giyong smiled. “Second door on your right. Are you hungry, Master Changmin?”
Changmin nodded. “Very much. Thank you.”
“I will go have dinner prepared and bring it up to your room.”
“Thank you.”
The creature turned away and Changmin went in the opposite direction to the bathroom. His head was swimming with too many thoughts. The bathroom was warm, a stark contrast than the rest of the house. The walls were gray rock, almost like … a cave wall. On the far left was the cause of the heat. A deep pool swirled, and a short waterfall cascaded from above. Steam filled the small area and then Changmin noted another smaller waterfall trickling over the side of the tub and disappearing.
“Ingenious,” Changmin whispered.
There was what could only be a toilet in front of him, rustic as it was. Changmin eyed it for a moment, reminded of porta-potties on Earth. It was a bit distasteful, and then he noticed the sound of water, running through it. Self-cleaning. No smell. With a deep breath, he used the “toilet”.
His eyes were again drawn to the pool, and he decided that being clean was a fantastic idea. He had no idea how long he had been in bed, but it felt like more than a couple of days. He hung the robe up and took off the cotton pants. The water wasn’t as hot as he was expecting, but it was hotter than the room. Two stone steps led up, and his hand found a metal bar above as he lifted his leg over the edge and into the water. He submerged, sighing, up to his neck. The pool was deeper than he thought, the water hit his upper chest. He moved to the waterfall, tilting his head back as the warm water streamed around him.
On a shelf cut into the wall were colored blocks that Changmin assumed were soaps. Again, there were three wash cloths: red, blue and green. Changmin picked up the red one. He smelled each soap, found one that reminded him of the woods and earth and flowers, and used that one. He dipped both into the water, rubbing the soap into the hand towel until there were suds. He scrubbed his body down, mind and boding relaxing from the mix of smells and heat.
“Took you about three minutes to find the best spot in the house.”
Changmin was startled but too relaxed to move more than his head to the sound. Yoochun leaned against the door. He wore a blue robe, but it was open, showing that he’d taken off his shirt, and only wore black pants.
“It’s nice,” Changmin said.
Yoochun nodded, tilted his head, and then a moment later, Junsu was there, looking panicked.
“He thought you left.”
“Sorry,” Changmin said as Junsu moved to the tub. Changmin went to the edge and his hands found Junsu’s and Junsu leaned forward like he was going for a kiss, and then he pulled back, blushing in apology. Changmin tugged on his hands. Junsu looked up, embarrassed, scared.
Changmin smiled. “Where would I go, huh? Wander around in a strange world by myself without the only two people I recognize? Must I remind you again that I’m smarter than that.”
Junsu smiled, and then burst into happy laughter. Uncaring of the water, he lunged forward and wrapped his arms around Changmin’s shoulders. Changmin laughed with him, and then pulled on him. Junsu lost his balance and fell, fully clothed into the water.
Yoochun laughed as Junsu spluttered and wiped his face off. Changmin was taller than him, and the water was almost to Junsu’s chin. Changmin put his arms around him, under the wet green robe, along his skin, and he shivered at the alien feel of energy sparking between them. Junsu stilled in his arms.
Changmin buried his face in Junsu’s neck, trying to figure out what the hell he was feeling. He felt like he was on a roller coaster, but his body was staying still and it was his emotions and mind running fast, over hills and valleys. When Junsu’s hands slipped down his back, he felt like he’d just gone through a series of loops.
Another hand touched his bare shoulder, and steadied him, kept him from flying off the side of the rail.
He lifted his head, met Yoochun’s blue sparking eyes and smiled.
“You okay?” Yoochun whispered.
Changmin nodded. “Well, not really.” He let go of Junsu with one hand and tugged on Yoochun.
Yoochun laughed. “No way,” he said. “Not now. You need to eat.”
Changmin’s stomach agreed with Yoochun.
Junsu leaned away, legs tightening around Changmin’s waist. “Sorry, Min. I … I just …”
Changmin touched Junsu’s cheek. “Don’t be sorry, Su-ah. I don’t mind. Which is weird, because I hate it when people touch me. At all. But you feel … this feels … crazy, but normal. Secure, and … I’m not making any sense.”
Junsu pressed his forehead to Changmin’s, bright green eyes boring into Changmin’s. “It makes perfect sense.”
Changmin wanted to kiss him, but a niggling thought in the back of his mind stopped him. It felt normal to want to kiss this man, but the sensible side of him reminded him that he had no idea who he was, but even as he thought that, he felt that he knew everything about Junsu.
Changmin hugged him close instead.
“Come on. Let’s go eat,” Yoochun said.
Junsu pulled away but before he could go too far, Changmin kissed his cheek. Junsu shook in his arms.
“You’ll be patient with me,” Changmin whispered.
Junsu nodded. “I’m …”
“Don’t apologize again,” Changmin said. He pushed wet, purple hair off Junsu’s forehead and then kissed the pale skin.
Junsu smiled and reached for the edge of the pool. Changmin waited until he was secure on a ledge hidden under the water and then let him go. Junsu hauled himself up and out. He sat on the edge and slipped the robe off his shoulders. It landed with a wet glomp. Junsu stood up, and as those black pants moved, Changmin looked away quickly, blushing, because he suddenly wanted to know what Junsu looked like naked.
“Are you getting out?” Yoochun asked.
Changmin nodded, and then carefully looked up. Junsu was wrapped in Yoochun’s blue robe, and Yoochun only wore black pants. In that quick glance, Changmin soaked in the sight of his naked upper body, felt himself blush a deeper red.
Yoochun seemed to understand though. “We’ll be in the dining room. At the end of the hall, there are stairs, just go all the way down them and turn left.”
Changmin nodded. “O-okay.”
Junsu smiled widely at him, not turning away from Changmin until Yoochun tittered in annoyance and pulled him out of the room.
Changmin smiled to himself. Without Junsu next to him, he felt … normal. But not complete. He felt … he wasn’t sure, but he didn’t like it. He craved to be next to him, and next to Yoochun.
Part 2: Fire Mind
.
Pairing: Yoochun/Junsu/Changmin (ninja!Heechul/Donghae)
Rating: This part is only PG (will be NC-17 later)
Disclaimer: Not mine, even in my own ddelusionall crazy world.
Summary: Changmin trusts no one, not after his only two friends left him at such a young age. He has his research thank you very much. But when he's suddenly pulled into their world, he has to trust them again. But his feelings and his brain don't always agree on things.
A/N: This fic is for My Haru Haru!!! harunotenshi Happy birthday my loverly darling! I hope you like it! ♥♥♥
Poster credit goes to ingenu3! Thank you darling! It's amazing! ♥
Part 1:
Changmin first met Yoochun and Junsu when he was five years old. He was playing with trucks, smashing them against each other, and then there were these two grown ups there.
“I can’t talk to strangers,” Changmin said, and ignored them as he played.
Yoochun and Junsu smiled at each other.
By the time Changmin was seven, he had two imaginary friends. They became constant presences in his life, and sometimes even went to school with him. He liked those days because the bullies didn’t beat him up for being able to do times tables in his head or for knowing that the liquid-vapor critical point for xenon is 16.6 Celsius.
He liked Yoochun more, unless Junsu asked, and then he said he liked Junsu more, but really, he loved them both. Without any siblings and with parents who did not understand him, he needed them very much.
And then one day they were gone.
Changmin was devastated. Left alone at eleven years old. He never did quite recover from the abandonment. Throughout his life, he never had any real friends, convinced they would leave him like Yoochun and Junsu had. He never had relationships other than his left hand and the blue dildo in his bedside drawer (hey, a man has needs). Though sometimes he went to a bar, or a club for the real thing. A single night. Most of those nights he drank enough that he thought he saw Yoochun and Junsu again.
Although, by the time he was twenty-four he no longer remembered exactly what they looked like. Fleeting dreams, fleeting images, fleeting moments of his heart clenching. Waking dreams. And a single, constant thought of soon.
And of course, he had no idea what that thought was for. He thought it would signify the day he’d finished his Master’s degree in Chemistry. He thought it would signify the day he started researching bio-luminescent plantlife and their healing qualities and how those could be manipulated to help cancer patients deal with pain.
But even as he did all of that, the nagging thought of soon would not leave his brain.
And he burned himself out. Working, researching, teaching, studying, learning. He loved it all, every ounce of knowledge was a gift, and he knew this, but he tried too much, too hard, too often, and was put on mandatory leave from work for three weeks.
The first week he spent drunk.
After digging around in his fridge and finding nothing but spoiled food, Changmin went out for dinner.
Less than a hundred yards from his door, a voice screamed NOW in his head and he smacked into someone, hard enough to topple them both to the ground. He couldn’t get his hands underneath him fast enough and his head smacked into the concrete.
His last thought was Well, that isn’t going to be good for the temporal bone.
☼☼☼☼☼
Changmin groaned at the pain in his head. Oh, man, he did not want to wake up at all. Nausea filled his stomach, flooded his mouth, and he leaned over the bed to throw up.
What the hell did he do last night?
He groaned again and thought he could feel his brain moving, probably trying to crawl out of his skull and get away from the pain.
“Drink this,” a soft voice whispered. The lip of a glass pressed against his mouth and cool liquid splashed over his lips. It tasted of moss and dirt and berries, and it was not unpleasant.
He tried to open his eyes and then as a forgotten vision of a childhood friend smiled down at him, Changmin decided he was still drunk and dreaming.
“Junsu left me,” Changmin muttered and then went back to sleep.
☼☼☼☼☼
The second time Changmin woke up, he knew he was not in his bed. The mattress was too soft, the linens too fine. And the blanket was deep, ocean blue. Changmin’s blankets were … plaid? striped? He frowned. He’d never noticed his blankets before.
“Are you awake, Master Changmin?”
Changmin turned his head and blinked slowly. The … creature next to his bed was short with pale blue, almost white skin, pointed ears and a pointed nose with other more obvious humanoid features.
“Probably not,” Changmin said, but his voice was hoarse with disuse and he coughed.
The creature immediately handed him a cup. With shaking hands, Changmin drank more of the earthy juice.
“And are you hungry?”
Changmin remembered throwing up and shook his head, surprised when there was no pain.
“Very well. I shall let Master Yoochun know you have--”
“Yoochun?” Changmin said, sitting up straight.
The creature smiled. “Yes. Master Yoochun. It is your bed he’s in. He’s been sharing with Master Junsu while you recovered, not that it’s been such a vast difference in the way things usually are.”
Changmin did not know what to say. Yoochun? Junsu? His memory supplied him with two figures, and he shook his head. They were imaginary friends. That was all.
A door shut quietly, and Changmin realized he was alone. This was some fucked up dream, he decided. He laid back down on the bed, fingers pinching the smooth sheets.
The door opened again, and then a man Changmin thought only existed in his mind stepped into the room. It still is just in your mind, Min. You’re dreaming.
Yoochun was beautiful. His features were round, wide, and yet soft. A dimple showed when he smiled, his teeth were slightly crooked. His cheeks were full, his lower lip plump, eyes wide with a level of happiness that Changmin had wished for all his life. They sparked with blue streaks, almost like lightning. Long black hair fell to the middle of his shoulders in a thick, braided queue.
He moved to the bed, and Changmin shrank from him until his back was against the headboard and his knees were drawn up to his chest..
“I’m assuming you have questions,” Yoochun said with a smile. He sat on the end of the bed and crossed his legs.
He sat like that before. So many times as he watched Changmin do his homework, or play with his chemistry set. All the time.
And even though his heart hammered in his chest and his usually smart, helpful brain was completely blank with shock, he wondered where Junsu was.
“Junsu, if you’re wondering, is bent over a text book at the moment trying to figure out what the hell you two did when you bumped into each other that brought you here.”
“Here. And here is?”
“The demon realm.”
Changmin’s mouth gaped open.
“Shall I start at the beginning?” Yoochun said, and then tilted his head. “No, no. That’s way too much. You don’t seem to care about the splitting of time and dimensions by the warlocks, causing a rift and an alternate … I hesitate to call it a universe, because it isn’t, not in the sense that the Earth resides in a universe. Consider it a mirror, I guess. A mirror image of the Earth, though the life is vastly different and …”
Changmin remembered that Yoochun had a tendency to ramble if Junsu was not there to stop him. It made Yoochun’s bedtime stories long, detailed and fascinating.
“Um, … Yoo-yoochun?” Changmin said carefully.
“You remembered!” Yoochun said with a wide smile, “Junsu is going to be excited that you know--”
“You left me,” Changmin said, and Yoochun frowned at the harshness of it. Changmin never did like the social etiquette in life that required him to be polite to refrain from hurting someone’s feelings. He preferred to be straightforward. And at this point, he didn’t care where he was, he didn’t care if he was dreaming, all he cared about was his broken heart at eleven years old.
“Well, we weren’t really there, Changmin.”
“You left me,” Changmin said again, stronger.
“That’s what I’m trying to explain to you. We weren’t really there, more like a mirror image of ourselves.”
“But why could I see you? Why couldn’t anyone else? Why …”
“Many of the people you see every day are people like we were. Reflecting our world into your world. It’s because you were born on the wrong side, Changmin. You were not supposed to be human.”
Changmin stared at him.
“It took Junsu and I decades to locate you. Time goes faster here than it does there. And then we were lucky and we were able to communicate with you, but not make you understand. You were young and you considered them stories and games. Our connection to Earth is volatile, Changmin. It shifts and distorts, and we did not leave you, but we lost the connection to see you. It took even more decades to find it again.”
“So how … what?”
“Straight to the point. Simple.”
“Jusnu could do it that way. I doubt you can.”
Yoochun smiled. “You are demon. We’ll have to test your magic and there’s the problem with the lack of telepathy to overcome, but …”
“Straight to the point,” Changmin said with a sigh.
“Oh, right. You are demon. We are one. Our birth was aligned with a catastrophic rift in the space between our worlds, and you were lost beyond it. We have been trying to find a way to bring you back or to take us there for so, so long.”
And then Changmin realized the voice that always whispered soon in his head had been Yoochun’s voice. A vague picture of Yoochun comforting a distraught Junsu filled his mind. Yoochun holding him, his own heart breaking as he tried his best to encourage Junsu to look again, search again. Soon, soon, soon.
His own heart and mind had chanted that, and there had always been a feeling of something missing. Someone missing. No one, nothing, not even his love of his research had filled that gaping chasm in his soul. He felt a tear roll down his cheek.
“But … but …” The biologist in him shook his head. “I have a mother and a father, how is this possible?”
“Junsu has been working out the logistics of it for almost a hundred years. Your soul was put into a human body, just like any other soul, but it was just on the wrong side of the mirror. There is nothing wrong about your human birth, or different than what would have happened in your demon birth.”
“But … then I’m human?”
“No. You’re demon.”
“You’re not making any sense at all.”
“You’re trying to figure it out with the human science part of your brain. Physically yes, you’re human, but the physicality of a human is no different than that of a demon. You are man. Consider human and demon as different species if it makes your mind understand, even though we are the same and our genetic codes will be the same. The difference is not in the physical, but the spiritual. And not spiritual in the religious sense. Human, demon, man, we are all part of the world we’re born in. One human dies, another is born. One demon dies, another is born, both formed of the same being.”
“So like reincarnation?”
“Yes, if you must put a religious term to the process. It is simply called birth.”
The door banged open. “Yoochun, I think I … Changmin!”
Changmin had only a moment to see short, bright purple hair and an amazingly beautiful smile and then arms were around his shoulders, Junsu practically in his lap.
Yoochun chuckled as Changmin froze. He did not do contact with people.They … they made him feel uncomfortable.
Changmin felt Junsu’s heart beating, felt his body heaving with tears and very slowly, he lifted his arms and put them around Junsu, tightening as Junsu cried harder.
“He’s missed you,” Yoochun said. He held out a hand, and Changmin reached for it automatically. Yoochun gripped his fingers and then moved over to him, hugging Junsu from behind, and the for the first time in a long time, Changmin was complete. Everything made sense, nothing was amiss, and he had no worries. It terrified him, but as the flare of fear emerged, two foreign feelings of comfort surrounded it and reassured it.
Junsu sniffed and lifted his head. Shining, startling green eyes met Changmin’s. They sparked with the same level as intensity as Yoochun’s blue ones.
“I can’t believe you’re here,” Junsu said.
“I … I’m still confused,” Changmin said.
Junsu smiled and rubbed his cheek against Changmin’s. “Probably, just … let me have a minute. I … “
Changmin didn’t need him to finish that sentence.
Yoochun cocked his head to the side, and Changmin felt like he missed something.
Junsu broke away from him. “You have no telepathy?”
Changmin shook his head. “That’s … that’s not possible.”
“For the human brain it’s not. Fuck, Yoochun.” Junsu looked about ready to cry again.
“Dont’ worry, Su. It’s still him. You can feel it. Look at his eyes. He’s there.”
“M-my eyes?”
Yoochun smiled. “Your eyes have always been different, haven’t they? A deep reddish brown.”
Changmin nodded.
“It’s the fire demon in you.”
“F-fire?”
“We’re worried that you wouldn’t have the same abilities as we do because of your human body, but Junsu will figure it out, because he’s the smartest.”
Changmin snorted. “I’m smart.”
“With human knowledge.”
Changmin looked at them both, determined. “C-can I … Let me help. I love research. It’s my favorite thing.”
Yoochun grinned. “Of course you can help. But you need to rest. You still haven’t recovered from the transfer.”
Changmin let Junsu lay him down. “W-what happened?”
Junsu smiled. “I have no idea. But I found myself on Earth and I thought it was just a mirror again, an image, and I saw you and ran to you and I thought I’d just pass through you, and you weren’t looking up and didn’t hear me call.”
Junsu had said Now, in his head. Changmin heard it.
“No … no … you …” Changmin tried to remember, but it was only a feeling. “A … feeling. You wanted me to look up, to see you, and I heard you scream Now, and then …”
Junsu and Yoochun exchanged a look with a smile, and then they both laughed in delight and snuggled up to him.
“Um.”
“Be quiet. We haven’t had a chance to ever hold you like this. Ever.” Junsu buried deeper against him.
Yoochun smiled at Changmin and said, “It feels good to be whole again.” He lifted his hand, a trail of light blue light swirled around his hand and the creature who had been there when he woke up poked his head into the door.
“Giyong, we are going to sleep for a few hours. Please have dinner prepared.”
The creature nodded and shut the door.
“And that was … “
“An imp,” Yoochun supplied. “Just another creature in this world. I’ll introduce you properly later. For now sleep.”
Changmin did not sleep for long minutes. He pondered the two men laying against him. Strangers and yet he felt he knew them so well. Part of him was afraid to shut his eyes, because if this was a dream, vivid crazy and created from too much to drink, then he’d wake up. And he hoped … he wanted it to be real.
☼☼☼☼☼
When he woke up, Changmin still thought he was dreaming, because he was warm, under shadows from the covers. Both of the men he fell asleep with were still pressed against him, still sleeping, both smiling slightly. He understood without being told that they were like him. They had problems sleeping, bouts of insomnia, nights staring at nothing wondering what was missing in their life. Except they knew what was missing. Changmin did not know what was missing.
And for once, the three of them slept peacefully, as they should have for the last few hundred years.
Except Changmin really had to pee. A part deep inside of him did not want to get up, did not want to be away from these two after so long without them. His bladder ultimately won, and very carefully, he lifted himself over Yoochun. Junsu whimpered, but Yoochun rolled over and they cuddled together, settling.
Changmin took a deep breath and climbed out of bed. All he wore were pants that hit his leg at mid calf. The air was cool, and the light from outside showed that it was dusk. There were three robes hanging on a hook near the door. Changmin took the red one, knowing somehow it was his, leaving the blue and green where they hung. There were no other doors in the bedroom. Carefully he turned the ornate handle of the heavy wooden door and opened it. He stepped into a long hall.
“Master Changmin.”
Changmin jumped, breath catching as he spun around. That blue creature stood behind him. All he wore was a pair of short black pants, much like his own.
“Giyong,” Changmin said.
The creature smiled. “You remembered. Good. YooSu said you might forget things easily.”
Changmin was insulted, because he never forgot anything. Except who he really was. That seemed like a huge failure on his part. But part of him still didn’t believe it.
“Um, I have to go to the bathroom.”
Giyong smiled. “Second door on your right. Are you hungry, Master Changmin?”
Changmin nodded. “Very much. Thank you.”
“I will go have dinner prepared and bring it up to your room.”
“Thank you.”
The creature turned away and Changmin went in the opposite direction to the bathroom. His head was swimming with too many thoughts. The bathroom was warm, a stark contrast than the rest of the house. The walls were gray rock, almost like … a cave wall. On the far left was the cause of the heat. A deep pool swirled, and a short waterfall cascaded from above. Steam filled the small area and then Changmin noted another smaller waterfall trickling over the side of the tub and disappearing.
“Ingenious,” Changmin whispered.
There was what could only be a toilet in front of him, rustic as it was. Changmin eyed it for a moment, reminded of porta-potties on Earth. It was a bit distasteful, and then he noticed the sound of water, running through it. Self-cleaning. No smell. With a deep breath, he used the “toilet”.
His eyes were again drawn to the pool, and he decided that being clean was a fantastic idea. He had no idea how long he had been in bed, but it felt like more than a couple of days. He hung the robe up and took off the cotton pants. The water wasn’t as hot as he was expecting, but it was hotter than the room. Two stone steps led up, and his hand found a metal bar above as he lifted his leg over the edge and into the water. He submerged, sighing, up to his neck. The pool was deeper than he thought, the water hit his upper chest. He moved to the waterfall, tilting his head back as the warm water streamed around him.
On a shelf cut into the wall were colored blocks that Changmin assumed were soaps. Again, there were three wash cloths: red, blue and green. Changmin picked up the red one. He smelled each soap, found one that reminded him of the woods and earth and flowers, and used that one. He dipped both into the water, rubbing the soap into the hand towel until there were suds. He scrubbed his body down, mind and boding relaxing from the mix of smells and heat.
“Took you about three minutes to find the best spot in the house.”
Changmin was startled but too relaxed to move more than his head to the sound. Yoochun leaned against the door. He wore a blue robe, but it was open, showing that he’d taken off his shirt, and only wore black pants.
“It’s nice,” Changmin said.
Yoochun nodded, tilted his head, and then a moment later, Junsu was there, looking panicked.
“He thought you left.”
“Sorry,” Changmin said as Junsu moved to the tub. Changmin went to the edge and his hands found Junsu’s and Junsu leaned forward like he was going for a kiss, and then he pulled back, blushing in apology. Changmin tugged on his hands. Junsu looked up, embarrassed, scared.
Changmin smiled. “Where would I go, huh? Wander around in a strange world by myself without the only two people I recognize? Must I remind you again that I’m smarter than that.”
Junsu smiled, and then burst into happy laughter. Uncaring of the water, he lunged forward and wrapped his arms around Changmin’s shoulders. Changmin laughed with him, and then pulled on him. Junsu lost his balance and fell, fully clothed into the water.
Yoochun laughed as Junsu spluttered and wiped his face off. Changmin was taller than him, and the water was almost to Junsu’s chin. Changmin put his arms around him, under the wet green robe, along his skin, and he shivered at the alien feel of energy sparking between them. Junsu stilled in his arms.
Changmin buried his face in Junsu’s neck, trying to figure out what the hell he was feeling. He felt like he was on a roller coaster, but his body was staying still and it was his emotions and mind running fast, over hills and valleys. When Junsu’s hands slipped down his back, he felt like he’d just gone through a series of loops.
Another hand touched his bare shoulder, and steadied him, kept him from flying off the side of the rail.
He lifted his head, met Yoochun’s blue sparking eyes and smiled.
“You okay?” Yoochun whispered.
Changmin nodded. “Well, not really.” He let go of Junsu with one hand and tugged on Yoochun.
Yoochun laughed. “No way,” he said. “Not now. You need to eat.”
Changmin’s stomach agreed with Yoochun.
Junsu leaned away, legs tightening around Changmin’s waist. “Sorry, Min. I … I just …”
Changmin touched Junsu’s cheek. “Don’t be sorry, Su-ah. I don’t mind. Which is weird, because I hate it when people touch me. At all. But you feel … this feels … crazy, but normal. Secure, and … I’m not making any sense.”
Junsu pressed his forehead to Changmin’s, bright green eyes boring into Changmin’s. “It makes perfect sense.”
Changmin wanted to kiss him, but a niggling thought in the back of his mind stopped him. It felt normal to want to kiss this man, but the sensible side of him reminded him that he had no idea who he was, but even as he thought that, he felt that he knew everything about Junsu.
Changmin hugged him close instead.
“Come on. Let’s go eat,” Yoochun said.
Junsu pulled away but before he could go too far, Changmin kissed his cheek. Junsu shook in his arms.
“You’ll be patient with me,” Changmin whispered.
Junsu nodded. “I’m …”
“Don’t apologize again,” Changmin said. He pushed wet, purple hair off Junsu’s forehead and then kissed the pale skin.
Junsu smiled and reached for the edge of the pool. Changmin waited until he was secure on a ledge hidden under the water and then let him go. Junsu hauled himself up and out. He sat on the edge and slipped the robe off his shoulders. It landed with a wet glomp. Junsu stood up, and as those black pants moved, Changmin looked away quickly, blushing, because he suddenly wanted to know what Junsu looked like naked.
“Are you getting out?” Yoochun asked.
Changmin nodded, and then carefully looked up. Junsu was wrapped in Yoochun’s blue robe, and Yoochun only wore black pants. In that quick glance, Changmin soaked in the sight of his naked upper body, felt himself blush a deeper red.
Yoochun seemed to understand though. “We’ll be in the dining room. At the end of the hall, there are stairs, just go all the way down them and turn left.”
Changmin nodded. “O-okay.”
Junsu smiled widely at him, not turning away from Changmin until Yoochun tittered in annoyance and pulled him out of the room.
Changmin smiled to himself. Without Junsu next to him, he felt … normal. But not complete. He felt … he wasn’t sure, but he didn’t like it. He craved to be next to him, and next to Yoochun.
Part 2: Fire Mind
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