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Comments 22

sweetwatersong July 16 2012, 00:26:59 UTC
Your Clint banter is perfect. You had me sold with 'offbeat choice of weaponry', and ending with 'a little more alive' only clinched the deal. And the levity he brings is a great balance for the seriousness, the struggle that we get in the first few parts - I like how you convey Natasha's five-day self and the weight of her past at the same time. It's especially interesting to consider when you put it against Clint's view, where he thinks of her as a legend, as someone whole and unbroken. That they both think of her as an asset is a nice joining point ( ... )

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im_ridiculous July 17 2012, 00:35:49 UTC
Oh my goodness, thankyou so much for such a generous and considered comment!! I can't tell you how thrilled I am that you liked this, thankyou so much for taking the time to tell me! :D And the Clint banter... that is just icing on the cake - I was really, really struggling to write him. And still wasn't sure that I hadn't missed the mark completely so I am so happy (and relieved!) that you feel it rings true ( ... )

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sienamystic July 16 2012, 01:12:18 UTC
I really liked this. It's tense and it crackles in just the right way - sparse and clean. Great fic!

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im_ridiculous July 17 2012, 00:39:20 UTC
Gah! Tense, crackle, sparse and clean! It's like you reached into my head and pulled out precisely what I was going for! I am thrilled - seriously - that that's how it reads to you too, you've made my day :D I'm so pleased you liked it, and thankyou so much for letting me know!

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workerbee73 July 16 2012, 01:37:46 UTC
(Moving my comment over here so it can hang with all the other comments. ;))

I am so proud of this story and so, so proud of you. I mean it. It's an amazing first fic (gah, if only mine was this good out of the gate--it bodes well, I say!)

There's a lot of stop and start here, a lot of staccato, and most of it doesn't read like a narrative so much as a disjointed tone poem, but I think that's why it works so well. I love how you capture the 'real' pieces of Natasha that keep breaking through to the surface, I love Clint's consummate denial and his purely 'professional' interest (and I've now decided that we totally need the fic where he's all obsessing over her file before he even goes out on the mission--I'm totally going to request that in the promptathon).

And that last section? Their exchange? So unbelievably perfect. That ending just makes me smile and smile.

Great work. :)

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im_ridiculous July 17 2012, 00:47:09 UTC
Aww Bee... this comment makes ME smile and smile! As does this fandom!

Thankyou so much. This story is so much better because of your ideas (especially the 'numbered sections/alternating between numbers and Roman numerals' thing, which I love SO HARD and more and more each time I look at if. Genius.), your judicious editing and kind encouragement, and for talking me back from the melodrama ledge!

And most of all, words like this, coming from someone whose work I love so much, just means...... well a lot. As you know :) Thankyou thankyou, O-Bee-Wan. I have no words (and as you know, for me that's really saying something ;P) :DD

ps... am totally obsessed with the Clint and his professional interest thing now. This could be a problem...

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allisnow July 16 2012, 06:49:15 UTC
This is your first fic? Good golly. I love the disjointedness from Natasha's perspective and how she's kind of discovering who she is (or might be) along the way, and I love Clint badassing it up and of course the banter.

*thumbs up*

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im_ridiculous July 17 2012, 00:52:34 UTC
Aww yay! Thumbs up gratefully accepted! Thanks so much, I'm really, really pleased you enjoyed it and thankyou for taking the time to tell me :) It is indeed the first one ever. So, y'know, intimidating!!! Particularly given the awesome yacht-like quality of this fandom. It's such a relief not to have let the characters down. I love disjointed Nat too, because we know she'll get there and it makes that moment so earned. And I am so happy you liked the badassery and banter - I really, really struggled with writing Clint here and it's just awesome to hear you think it worked. Thankyou so much! :)

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allisnow July 17 2012, 00:54:18 UTC
Particularly given the awesome yacht-like quality of this fandom.

It really is wonderful, isn't it? I feel so spoiled...

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im_ridiculous July 17 2012, 00:56:45 UTC
PERFECT ICON IS PERFECT!!! :D

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chrisfaithalin July 16 2012, 06:54:18 UTC
I loved the way you described Natasha's lostness and I think you did a great job with Clint's voice. I really liked this.

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im_ridiculous July 17 2012, 00:55:55 UTC
Thankyou so much for your lovely comment! I'm thrilled you enjoyed it and thanks so much for taking the time to tell me :) As I've said above, I really felt I was struggling to write Clint in way that wasn't totally cheesy, so your comment really means a lot! And I love lost Nat too - I just couldn't see how she'd allow herself to be brought over to SHIELD unless she kinda hit rock bottom first. Thanks so much :D

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