we'll dance inside the song.
oh friday, the glorious end of the stress called the week. the night was seemingly normal, i figured i'd tag along. so, as i stood amidst the swaggering lights and booming speakers, i tried to keep my glance moving around, but it was harder than i expected. i mean, even though it's been a few years, he's still has that something...that incredible aspect i can't pinpoint that draws me.
the rest of the night honestly is now a blur. before i knew it, i was gazing out into the dark of the steep mound of dirt and trees that he called a back yard. i felt that feeling coming back, that light-headed school girl akwardness...for once in a long time, i didn't know how to act in this situation. i mean, i had never been with him alone...alone. i heard the door softly close behind me. his voice is a foreign one to me, even though at the same time i was engrossed with a strange familiarity. i felt his arm lean against the wall above me and the his scent only accompanied his tall shadow i viewed in the ground. it happened so quickly, i didn't even have time to realize it. a glance in my eyes and then we were kissing. it took me a moment to register myself...i was kissing him....i was kissing HIM. and it wasn't just a peck, oh no. the more we kissed, the more i fell a slave to the warm, gorgeous charm he never lost, but i tried to forget. how he does everything--how he moves, how he speaks, how he touched my face and more than anything that smile....
i still have to keep telling myself it happened...it all feels like one of my dreams i've hit the repeat button on. but at the same time, i felt i couldn't look into his eyes, or even be happy about it....can i? the more i think about it, the more it makes my stomach flutter. if only this time a year or even two years ago. would he break my heart? of course, i knew that from the beginning. does he actually like me, probably not. but somehow, it all seems worth it. to have experienced a fantasy eight billion daydreams in the making...it seems an episode of my life has finally been recorded and stored. now if only i can stop playing it over in my head.....
the rest of the night honestly is now a blur. before i knew it, i was gazing out into the dark of the steep mound of dirt and trees that he called a back yard. i felt that feeling coming back, that light-headed school girl akwardness...for once in a long time, i didn't know how to act in this situation. i mean, i had never been with him alone...alone. i heard the door softly close behind me. his voice is a foreign one to me, even though at the same time i was engrossed with a strange familiarity. i felt his arm lean against the wall above me and the his scent only accompanied his tall shadow i viewed in the ground. it happened so quickly, i didn't even have time to realize it. a glance in my eyes and then we were kissing. it took me a moment to register myself...i was kissing him....i was kissing HIM. and it wasn't just a peck, oh no. the more we kissed, the more i fell a slave to the warm, gorgeous charm he never lost, but i tried to forget. how he does everything--how he moves, how he speaks, how he touched my face and more than anything that smile....
i still have to keep telling myself it happened...it all feels like one of my dreams i've hit the repeat button on. but at the same time, i felt i couldn't look into his eyes, or even be happy about it....can i? the more i think about it, the more it makes my stomach flutter. if only this time a year or even two years ago. would he break my heart? of course, i knew that from the beginning. does he actually like me, probably not. but somehow, it all seems worth it. to have experienced a fantasy eight billion daydreams in the making...it seems an episode of my life has finally been recorded and stored. now if only i can stop playing it over in my head.....