expectation
even through all my rebellion towards whatever i still feel like i am living in the wake of others expectations. I almost want my world to fall apart so i dont have to worry about anything or anyone and only have to live up to my own expectations.
that's a really good point. kinda goes along with what i was talking about the other night. we are products of our environment, thus eachother. it's so hard to avoid it.
not having to worry about other expectations is kind of like being responsible for only yourself. it could be awesome. kind of like how whats her name felt on Weeds when she was saying she wished sometimes she didnt have kids.
in my soc-psych class i learned how having societies increased the chances of survival thus became an evolutionary trend. that's why we have become so. . . wrapped up in society. as a result we often automatically function in a way that helps us conform to society, we try to please people.
however, so many of us are sick of it. the gigs up, we want out. we don't really need to worry about it anymore. we CAN survive on our own.
on the way home from umass i actually wrote a lot about that idea in my notebook. we got stoned and these thoughts just started coming to me so i began writing furiously. lol
ok i could go on forever.
i luv our talks :)
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