A Dark Night
I've been thinking a lot lately. Particularly about a movie.. ha!..
I watched The Dark Knight the other day (which was pretty friggin' awesome by the way) but the thing is - every time I watch a movie like that I am replenished with my wanting to be well... a superhero.
Sounds funny, I know, but I've got a feeling I'm not alone. Its just... I see movies like that and my life continues, but well... there is this wanting, this yearning for more. I'm not quite certain why I'm always cast into this mindset, for at times its rather disheartening. These really awesome movies seem to cast a rather bleak outlook on the real life to come. I've been thinking about it a lot lately...
I don't think it is so much the idealistic superhero role that I desire. Killing bad guys for the sake of society is good and all, its just... I so much yearn for that kind of resounding purpose. Spiderman, weenie as he may be, knows he should use his 'spideypowers' to hurdle himself from building top to building top 'webbing' all bad guys in his path, whilst hopelessly pursuing his Mary Jane. Batman, a bit more complicated, much cooler for he is still human, but similar. Even the Joker - evil, yes - but with such a clear and defined drive to his life. Not necessarily the killing of Batman, but the support, the push, towards an anarchaic society; inevitably a push towards chaos. Regardless, they all have an inner drive within themselves - ignorant to the views of society, but concentric to their views alone - which is most important of all.
I see people walking around and I sometimes feel like they have this unstoppable driving purpose leading the path of their life. I think 'heh.. good for them.' Not because they've got it easy, but instead they've got enough conviction in whatever they're pursuing that they will get there...
Superhero movies make me wish I had superpowers more so than they did when I was a child. At first glance this makes no sense... it seems to defy logic of a biomedical engineering/pre-med junior in college. But stop. Think about it as I did. When I was a kid I knew my purpose I had my drive. I was a kid. Had fun. Explored. Worked myself to the bone to be a kick-ass student because well.... I wanted to have the chance to do whatever I wanted in my adult life.
Problem: you've gotta spend enough time figuring out what you want first. Granted this changes; it almost always changes. But rest assured, there are doctors out there that wanted to be doctors when they were 12. There are marine biologists that dreamed of studying various aquatic life back when they had just learned to swim. This kind of find a love and stick with it mindset isn't so bad, but its got a trade off of, of course, the lack of roundedness. These people fail to soak up a taste of music, or a comfort with numbers, or an understanding of art (in all its various forms), or just a lack of enjoyment in experiencing something new.
In a sense, having your life neatly drawn for you isn't so nice. But right now, for many people aside from just me I suppose, that slate is black. Its time for us to pick up our chalk and start a-drawin', but what? Sometimes I feel I am the least creative person in the world... destined for the life of an accountant... but other times.. other times this lacking of creativity in my life drives me to spend hours upon hours pouring through youtube videos, skimming lastfm channels, meddling with my camera, and meandering at bookstores for something refreshingly new. I thought about it, and I think I am all for completely changing my life when I hit about 40. Granted this will be easier said than done with kids and all... but an occupation change at least sounds to my liking. Maybe I'm just being pessimistic but pursuing the same profession until death just sounds so damn boring.
To sum this all up... sigh... I see a pretty darn good superhero movie and for a little while my life seems so much bleaker. Everyone knows Batman should be Batman... but what should I be.
Sadly, 'should' cannot be used in the real world. Could... a definite... but could... so very infinite.
I watched The Dark Knight the other day (which was pretty friggin' awesome by the way) but the thing is - every time I watch a movie like that I am replenished with my wanting to be well... a superhero.
Sounds funny, I know, but I've got a feeling I'm not alone. Its just... I see movies like that and my life continues, but well... there is this wanting, this yearning for more. I'm not quite certain why I'm always cast into this mindset, for at times its rather disheartening. These really awesome movies seem to cast a rather bleak outlook on the real life to come. I've been thinking about it a lot lately...
I don't think it is so much the idealistic superhero role that I desire. Killing bad guys for the sake of society is good and all, its just... I so much yearn for that kind of resounding purpose. Spiderman, weenie as he may be, knows he should use his 'spideypowers' to hurdle himself from building top to building top 'webbing' all bad guys in his path, whilst hopelessly pursuing his Mary Jane. Batman, a bit more complicated, much cooler for he is still human, but similar. Even the Joker - evil, yes - but with such a clear and defined drive to his life. Not necessarily the killing of Batman, but the support, the push, towards an anarchaic society; inevitably a push towards chaos. Regardless, they all have an inner drive within themselves - ignorant to the views of society, but concentric to their views alone - which is most important of all.
I see people walking around and I sometimes feel like they have this unstoppable driving purpose leading the path of their life. I think 'heh.. good for them.' Not because they've got it easy, but instead they've got enough conviction in whatever they're pursuing that they will get there...
Superhero movies make me wish I had superpowers more so than they did when I was a child. At first glance this makes no sense... it seems to defy logic of a biomedical engineering/pre-med junior in college. But stop. Think about it as I did. When I was a kid I knew my purpose I had my drive. I was a kid. Had fun. Explored. Worked myself to the bone to be a kick-ass student because well.... I wanted to have the chance to do whatever I wanted in my adult life.
Problem: you've gotta spend enough time figuring out what you want first. Granted this changes; it almost always changes. But rest assured, there are doctors out there that wanted to be doctors when they were 12. There are marine biologists that dreamed of studying various aquatic life back when they had just learned to swim. This kind of find a love and stick with it mindset isn't so bad, but its got a trade off of, of course, the lack of roundedness. These people fail to soak up a taste of music, or a comfort with numbers, or an understanding of art (in all its various forms), or just a lack of enjoyment in experiencing something new.
In a sense, having your life neatly drawn for you isn't so nice. But right now, for many people aside from just me I suppose, that slate is black. Its time for us to pick up our chalk and start a-drawin', but what? Sometimes I feel I am the least creative person in the world... destined for the life of an accountant... but other times.. other times this lacking of creativity in my life drives me to spend hours upon hours pouring through youtube videos, skimming lastfm channels, meddling with my camera, and meandering at bookstores for something refreshingly new. I thought about it, and I think I am all for completely changing my life when I hit about 40. Granted this will be easier said than done with kids and all... but an occupation change at least sounds to my liking. Maybe I'm just being pessimistic but pursuing the same profession until death just sounds so damn boring.
To sum this all up... sigh... I see a pretty darn good superhero movie and for a little while my life seems so much bleaker. Everyone knows Batman should be Batman... but what should I be.
Sadly, 'should' cannot be used in the real world. Could... a definite... but could... so very infinite.