Beware! I have gone digital!
Mwahaha. Digital camera that is. Now, I shall carry it everywhere and when one of the odd things that always happens to me happens, I can record it and no longer be accused of hallucinating! Yay. Bring it on Bigfoot! I'm not scared. Mother and D got together and got it for me for Chrimbly.
Chrimbly was surprisingly uneventful this year. Oh, except for the time we had all went to the pub and I was the DD. As we were leaving, I got in the van, looked around and was vaguely thinking something was different and that I hadn't noticed the weird beadwork thingey on the dash before when I saw Mother standing in front of the van, looking puzzled. She told me later she was wondering why she had never noticed that she had a dealership license plate. She had never noticed because she doesn't; it was the wrong van! I would never suit a life of crime..... I bolted. My brothers and sister had come out by then and say they have never seen me move that fast before. I wasn't even doing anything wrong AND I was the only sober one. Dammit. Hours later, they were still laughing. One of them would start and set the others off. Well, me too, I laughed myself into a stomach ache once I was in the right van. In my defence, Mother switches vans constantly and this is a new one, the one that I got into was pretty much identical and the same colour as the one she had before.
The fun continued. I had been driving all day w. Mother giving me instructions but she had kept giving me wrong directions. She would say turn right when she meant left. It made for some interesting detours. So as we left the pub she told me to go right. Feeling rattled, I asked if she meant her right or my right and proceeded to turn left. OMG if I thought they had howled w. laughter before I hadn't seen anything yet. Then (fortunately after I had parked) we saw the fattest, oldest dog I have ever seen and I'm afraid we howled more at the sight of it. Poor thing. It was quite small really, a poodle or something. Mother swore it was really a pot bellied pig until she saw it properly. I swear it was a walking ball w. stubby little legs.
Oh, and I cut myself rather badly...twice. So that was eventful. Especially as my sister tends to panic in such situations. She was running around clucking and making me panic and I yelled at her to go away. So then I had to apologize.
Chrimbly was surprisingly uneventful this year. Oh, except for the time we had all went to the pub and I was the DD. As we were leaving, I got in the van, looked around and was vaguely thinking something was different and that I hadn't noticed the weird beadwork thingey on the dash before when I saw Mother standing in front of the van, looking puzzled. She told me later she was wondering why she had never noticed that she had a dealership license plate. She had never noticed because she doesn't; it was the wrong van! I would never suit a life of crime..... I bolted. My brothers and sister had come out by then and say they have never seen me move that fast before. I wasn't even doing anything wrong AND I was the only sober one. Dammit. Hours later, they were still laughing. One of them would start and set the others off. Well, me too, I laughed myself into a stomach ache once I was in the right van. In my defence, Mother switches vans constantly and this is a new one, the one that I got into was pretty much identical and the same colour as the one she had before.
The fun continued. I had been driving all day w. Mother giving me instructions but she had kept giving me wrong directions. She would say turn right when she meant left. It made for some interesting detours. So as we left the pub she told me to go right. Feeling rattled, I asked if she meant her right or my right and proceeded to turn left. OMG if I thought they had howled w. laughter before I hadn't seen anything yet. Then (fortunately after I had parked) we saw the fattest, oldest dog I have ever seen and I'm afraid we howled more at the sight of it. Poor thing. It was quite small really, a poodle or something. Mother swore it was really a pot bellied pig until she saw it properly. I swear it was a walking ball w. stubby little legs.
Oh, and I cut myself rather badly...twice. So that was eventful. Especially as my sister tends to panic in such situations. She was running around clucking and making me panic and I yelled at her to go away. So then I had to apologize.