Sep 22, 2009 18:07
100 Ways to Love You
Chapter 5: Better Than Any Girl
Rating: M
Let’s see now, how did I manage to get into this fucking situation? Let’s start with the fact my boyfriend has the fucking cutest lopsided smile, an unpredictable smirk, and puppy eyes than force me to agree. Fuck you God, fuck for making Yamamoto Takeshi so irresistible. You’re the fucking reason I’m standing in front of the part in a skirt. Yes, a fucking skirt. I refused to go on a date with him, but after he begged me and begged me, I kind of gave in, but I refuse to do any lovey dovey stuff with him. It’s awkward if I’m boy while he’s kissing me on the fucking cheek. So embarrassing. So, now I’m dressed up, with make up, extensions, a tight t-shirt, fake boobs, and a skirt. Yes you heard me right, fake boobs. Do these shoes have to be so small? I think they were called flats. Why is it pink again? You would think that I’d wear black, to tell the true, most of this is my sister’s old stuff. I know it’s a pretty stupid idea, but I thought it was good. Until I realized how long it took to apply eye liner and mascara. Why do girls have such wide hips and such short skirts? The shirts too, their too tight and too short. Well actually, it’s pretty comfortable, no no, that’s not my fucking point.
My fucking point is why am I standing here in a skirt with a purse? Why is Yamamoto late? I said I wouldn’t forgive him if he was late. As soon as I’m about to leave, then arms wrap around my waist and pull me back. I look up. “I’m sorry I’m late, I came from practice and I wanted to take a shower first.” I narrow my eyes and snort. “There are no exceptions for lateness, come on, let’s go the movie’s gonna start. You made me wait for such a fucking long time.” Yamamoto laughed casually. “I’m sorry Gokudera; it’s just that if I’m all sweaty you won’t let me hold you…” He pouted cutely and I gave a sigh. Why do I even let him do this? As we walk, our hands eventually start to go together, automatic thing, it’s not like we haven’t done anything more…oops, your not supposed to know that. Forget you heard that. The crowds are large and it’s easy to get lost, my hand held tightly in his, now that I think of it, I think it was pretty worth dressing up. I also remember being really pissed off. He hadn’t said anything about my outfit, I do all this for him and he doesn’t mention a single thing. How fucked up is that?
I slap his hand away as soon as we are out of the crowd. I’m guessing I’m looking pretty pissed because he’s staring at me like ‘oh what’s wrong gokudera’. I stare him down and turn around. “Fuck it, I’m going home.” Why did the hell did I wear this anyways? Why did I even agree to the fucking date anyways? I feel a hand on my wrist. “Ah, I’m sorry Gokudera, it’s just that you really wanted to see this movie and since we were going to be late, I wanted to get there first. I know you’ve been watching the trailers for a while now, but you look really gorgeous today.” Even though he said it late, why did I still blush? Angry, I walked away and sat down. “Now that we’ve missed the movie, you still have to go buy me a drink.” I said, the only way for him to leave for a little while. Yamamoto grinned and his face lightened up and ran towards the department store. I sat there, kind of nervous, because people were staring at me. “What the hell are you staring at!?” I shout at the guys staring at me. Some of them have the guts to come up to me, “Hey your really cute. Are you waiting for someone? Why don’t you come play with us?” One of the guys says. My eyes narrow and I reach into my pocket for my dynamites…shit. I DON’T HAVE A FUCKING POCKET. I pick up my purse, okay that was just gay. Anyways continuing, I look through it, my wallet…my wallet, and it’s ONLY MY FUCKING WALLET. SHIT.
At this point I’m like ‘okay Gokudera, don’t panic don’t panic…’ As I’m about to knee them in the stomach, a hand pulls me back into their arms. I look up and almost smile, it’s Yamamoto. No duh. Though he has that sexy fierce angry look on his face, if we weren’t outside I’d probably pounce on him… “Do you have some business with my girlfriend?” He asked in a husky voice, oh god. The boys looking discouraged, walk away quickly. I really can’t handle much more, I take his hand and pull him quickly towards, oh look it’s my apartment. He looks so confused right now, but as soon as the door is closed I kiss him. He gets the point. He licks my bottom lip and I open my mouth, his tongue slips in and feels around before doing that thing I love on my tongue. Of course, I moan very very loudly. Which can be embarrassing but right now I don’t really care. We stop kissing and his mouth goes to my ear and his tongue presses that kink. My knees goes weak and the only that’s supporting me is him. Well, I really hate the fact he’s so much stronger than me. He picks me up like it’s nothing and we end up going to my bed. My arms wrap around him as he’s moving down my body, everything on our top goes off, even his t-shirt. Shit. Does he have to be that fucking sexy? I hold his whole head as he starts to lick, nip, and kiss around, leaving red marks all over my stomach.
“Ah, Takeshi…” Oops, that kind of slipped out, he’s lifting up my skirt. “Are you seriously wearing panties?” I nod slightly with a blush and urge him to hurry up. He does right away, he doesn’t take off my skirt to my dismay. “Takeshi…” I murmur softly, mainly because I can’t do anything else, he licks the tip and I shiver, trying not to advert my eyes away. Too late, as he puts it in his mouth, my eyes shut close tightly, my head rolls back, and my back arches. My legs wrap around his back and I think my nails are digging into his back. Did I cut them recently? Another thing I noticed, while we’re doing this, having sex, I keep thinking, I keep thinking. I was thinking once, I can’t make him happy. I can’t be the girl he wants. Even though I’m dressed up like this, when he’s in me, I still can’t give him what he wants. I can’t give him a baby at all. I can’t love him the same way a girl can. I can’t do that. The tears start to roll down my cheek for no reason. He looks confused and seriously worried. “W-what’s wrong? Does it hurt? I’ll pull out.” I don’t say anything, I just want to hold him for a while, and so I do. He starts to pull out, “No! Don’t…” I shout all of a sudden. I start to cry again. I fucking seriously think way too much. I start to move and through my half lidded eyes, I can see his face mixed in pleasure and worry. I don’t want to stop, I won’t stop. Not until the sheets dots with white.
We’re sitting on the bed calmly and he’s face down into the pillow while I’m taking a puff. He looks up all of a sudden, gets up and hugs me. “I love you.” He says cheerfully and hugs me. I blush and push him away, “Shut up…I don’t need you to tell me that.”
The more I think, the more I realize…
He doesn’t want a girl.
HE wants ME
mature,
reborn,
8059,
100 ways