Team Knight - Round 7 - Fic

[00_13]

Title: Money, Baby.
Author: 00_13
Prompt: Chance.
Word count: 2403
Disclaimer: I wish I owned them. Sadly, I don't. :(
Rating: 17

Warnings: smut, secks, dirty smut!

Author's note: No beta! (oh god) so anything majorly wrong, tell me haha! Otherwise, enjoy! :)

****


The white walls of Arkham seemed to waver and tremble in the ensuing blow of flour and fire. A lone silhouette strode away quickly, messy curls whipping his face in the turmoil he had created. The scars stretched even further than should be humanly possible into a wider grin.

"La di la laa... Oh Batmaaaan, I'm coming out to plaay, you better be ready." He mused to himself, warbling and whistling his none exsistent tune, the notes as chaotic and jumbled as the man who sang them.

He licked his lips absently and noted how badly he'd missed his face-paint - the sickly smell and taste of it as he ran his lips round the ridged tissue either side of his mouth. "We'll have to do something about these clothes, can't go see Batty like this.. no, no. This just won't do!" He sharply swung to the left and darted down a dank alley, long legs picking up into a run, and then a sprint, as they carried him to the filthy door of one of his hideouts, albeit his more preferred one as some of the others did get quite smelly, namely the one in the sewers, Gotham's real underground.

He shoved the door hard at the bottom, knocked twice near the door handle and wrenched it up quickly, as the door swung open to reveal the mess he had left behind. Knives and other 'equipment' of his profession lay scattered amongst clothes and the occasional roll of duct tape or rope. He picked his way through the dump of possessions, snatching up various objects; a coat, a shirt, pants, a pair of wildly colored socks with rabbits printed on them, a pair of army-standard steel toe-capped boots, and a waistcoat. He dumped them unceremoniously on the lid of the toilet in the small bathroom, and wrestled with the tap for the shower until at last it gave with a screech and water jumped from the shower head.

Picking from the pocket of the nurses outfit, he found what he was looking for and slipped it into one of the inner pockets of the coat. "Hmm, can't lose that, can I? I need you my precious for dear Batman."

Stepping into the shower, he ducked his hair under and scrubbed; trying to rid himself of the smell of Arkham. 'A pity I can't do the same for the memories' He thought darkly, before stepping out of the shower and shaking himself like a dog, the fading green curls slapping his face gently.

He scrubbed the last moisture off himself with a towel he found lying in the small sink above a mirror festooned with smudges of greasepaint, before dressing swiftly in his clothes, all the while singing "la di la la.. My sweet Batman, how I long to dance again.." and cradling the towel in his arms in an attempt to dance with it. He made his way back into the main room of his apartment and scooped up a few choice items, placing each in its separate pocket, checking the innermost pocket still held the object he needed, before swiping up new tubes of greasepaint and going to the bathroom mirror, carefully applied it, smirking at his reflection when he was done. He reached into a cabinet below the sink and extracted a bottle of.. something, before spraying himself with it, and, waving prettily to himself in the mirror, made his exit from the apartment.

****

"Bruce, sir, the news. You may want to watch it. The Joker is on the lose again." Alfred informed him, nodding and making leave when Bruce wearily acknowledged. He just didn't get how the Joker could get out so often. He was a true master of trickery, as his name suggested.

Swiftly making his way to the elevator to the cave, Bruce stripped off his jumper and shirt as he went, before sliding out of his pants and shoes, and stepping into his boots, clipping on all his other Kevlar armor. He slid the cowl on and slipped into the tumbler, before roaring off into the night, senses on fire.

"Sir, the Joker's location is at 56th West Street, warehouse 13." Alfred's voice crackled on the receiver.
"I'm on my way." Bruce growled, and gunned the engine down the road, towards the docks.

Arriving at the warehouse, there seemed nothing odd about it, nothing seemed amiss, which was unusual considering the Joker should be inside. He cautiously slipped out of the tumbler, having left it in an inconspicuous place, and darted to the safety of the shadows. From there he made his plan to enter, first swinging up to the roof and opening a window in the roof. He silently, carefully, made his way through it, hanging on a thread no thicker than his little finger. What he saw next made his almost double-take in confusion. The warehouse was full of toys, which figured, considering it was the Joker.

****

Joker wondered how long Batman was going to take "C'mon Bats, haven't got all day here y'know.. Have places to blow up, people to kill.." he said, shifting on the castle-shaped bed he lay on in the middle of the warehouse. The pink covers had smears of his facepaint on, whilst his shoes lay discarded on the floor, his lime green and black stripy socks clashing horribly with the pale pink of the bed.

He absently flicked a coin between his long, pale fingers, whistling the tune he'd been singing since he went into Arkham.

****

Batman didn't know whether to swoop in and take him or sit and observe, as the Joker didn't seem to be doing anything bad, just whistling and flicking something small between those spidery fingers of his. But that small thing could be a detonator. he mused, and so, decision made, he opened his wings and let go of the rope, falling gracefully through the still air in the warehouse, landing just short of the end of the bed upon which his arch nemesis lay.

Standing there for a second to assess the situation the Joker's face lit up "Oh Bat, you came! Thought I was going to have to wait forever y'know, a guy like me doesn't uh, have much time on his hands." Just blood he thought gleefully.

Batman saw the object now, a coin. Relief should have came, but he knew better, being around the Joker. He stepped forward "Why are you here? What are you doing?" He growled. The Joker laughed, eyes sparkling with mischeif.

"Why Bats, I came to see you! Do you know how boring it is in that white, white Arkham, with their white, white walls and white, white doors? It pales me thinking about it!" He laughed heartily at his own joke, whilst the Batman inwardly sighed. Whilst he had been talking, the Joker had moved from the bed and circled the Batman, and now darted forward, pushing the Batman over, tripping him on the edge of the bed, which was far too small and he ended up cracking his head against the headboard, rendering him unconscious with the momentum of his fall.

"Well.. that makes my job easier!" He giggled with glee, clapping his hands like an over-excited child.

****

Batman awoke, groggily at first, and tried to shake his head to clear it, but found it strapped tightly down. He peered around and found himself still in the warehouse. The Joker loomed

above him, smiling brightly. "Gooood morning, gorgeous!" He chuckled throatily, the sound reverberating through the armor. Breaking his defenses.

"What are you doing?" He asked, mild panic fluttering through him, accompanied with a strong wave of lust, which all but drowned out every other thought. Must. block. my. cock. He thought, unsuccesfully. he could feel his erection starting to brush his suit, and he knew from experience that if something didn't happen soon he would scream from the need to release it, as the inside of his suit created a lot of friction, but in the wrong places... leaving him with sores. He winced at the thought.

"Well Bats, the reason I broke out of Arkham in such haste was because I got hold of a certain object.." He produced Harvey Two-Face Dent's lucky coin from his inner pocket, grinning mischeviously.

The look itself nearly made Bruce rip himself from the table and take him right there, but he told himself 'Let him think I can't move, keep him lulled, and then strike'

So he lay helpless as the Joker made his way round the bed to his head, bent down and, ear brushing the edge of his ear, growled in his ear throatily. "Oh Bats, there's so much I want to do to you, but we can't do it in one night, no, no. But tonight is special, because it's our first venture beyond flirting shamelessly!"

Bruce made a growl in protest, but Joker cut in "- no,no,no. Don't give me that, Bruce. I know as well as you do you're rock hard in your little batsuit and the one thing you wanna do is pin me here and fuck me senseless. I know. I anticipated it and decided to turn it round!" He giggled gleefully.

Bruce's eyes might have popped out at Joker knowing his true identity, except his cowl kept them firmly in place.

"How do you know?" He rasped, struggling to breathe with the tight plastic around him.

"Aw Bats, I knew since you kindly stopped Reese Coleman getting killed. Now, heads I take you, tails, you take me!" he giggled, flicking the silver coin high, letting it fall in the center of his hand. He flipped it onto the back of his left hand and he grinned, eyes flashing. He showed Bruce the outcome : Heads.

Bruce made a non-commital grunt, choosing not to tell him he knew it was a two-sided coin. Let him have his chance, he thought. Joker leapt up in one smooth move to straddle him,

leaning down to cut the plastic wrap which bound his head.
"Mm, Bats, how long have I waited for this!" The Joker moaned, his throbbing erection poking Batmans armor insistently.

"Just have to work out how to get the armor off and-"
The Joker's next words didn't reach his lips as Bruce shredded the bindings which held him and grabbed the clown and reversed their positions, clamping his mouth over the other's in a powerful, intoxicating kiss.

Joker melted in his arms, squirming wantonly beneath the hulking mass of muscle, breathing becoming erratic. Batman swept down to claim his mouth, hands working furiously to wrench open the Joker's shirt, buttons scattering. "Uh, Bats, my shi-" Bruce's hand brushed over the tented fabric, cutting Joker off.

Slipping the hot, hard flesh out his pants, Bruce immediately closed his lips round the head of Joker's throbbing cock and sucked, before breathing cold air on the tip, wet with saliva and pre-cum. The Joker writhed and squirmed, not caring how stupid he seemed, moaning like a cheap whore on the steets of the Narrows.

Bruce couldn't believe he was doing this. After all, a few months before, he didn't have a clue of the enchanting villain known as the Joker was even in exsistence.

He clamped his hot, wet mouth around Joker's hot, wet erection and wasted no time in sucking, nipping, kissing and moaning his way to Joker's climax, the orgasm rippling through him in waves strong enough to draw strangled cries from him and paralyse his legs, as Bruce crawled up to meet him and share the taste of his reward. Bruce was all too aware of his own erection rubbing against the kevlar of his suit, and scrabbled to undo the clasps to release it.

****

Joker lay panting heavily, wishing his arms would move fast enough to help Bruce undo the suit, but as he managed to lift his hand, a piece of kevlar clattered noisily to the floor. Well, so much for that, then. He nearly chuckled at the thought, but didn't have the energy nor the breath.

Looking upon the muscles rippling under smooth skin above, Joker suddenly had another burst of manic energy, and, cock twitching again, grabbed the strong forearms either side of his waist and flipped their positions. "Ahaha, Bruuucey, like I said, it's my playtime now.."

Joker bent down and lazily pulled off the cowl, the last item left on Bruce's body, fingers curling in his dark sweaty lock for a second, before catching Bruce's eye. He smirked casually and trailed his way down the muscles of his 'arch nemesis'' body, tongue lingering on a nipple, drawing a low, dark growl which rumbled up through Bruce's chest, heaving in and out in a futile attempt to control himself. Joker slipped his fingers in Bruces mouth, letting him suck them for a few seconds before inserting them quickly in Bruce's anus. The sudden feeling of heat and pain made Bruce arch his back and attempt to curl up, but a restraining hand on his midriff stopped him, and he relaxed. Joker removed the two fingers and spread his legs, ducking his head down and using his wicked tongue to tease grunts and suppressed moans out of the bigger man.

Moving swiftly, aware of the Bat's limited patience, he withdrew and used some of the pre-cum leaking from Bruce's erection to lubricate himself before sliding in in one long, smooth movement. Bruce seemed to move with it, rising up as he felt heat and pressure from within, letting out a long, throaty moan. Joker responded, gasping as Bruce tightened momentarily, and he grabbed the other's throbbing member and in time with his even thrusts, pumped him.

"Joker.. uhh..." Batman trailed off.. closing his eyes as Joker hit his prostate, body rippling in response. "Faster." He managed to squeeze out, and Joker immediately sped up, actions becoming erratic as he felt his own release pooling in the bottom of his stomach. Looking at the other man's face, he knew Bruce wasn't far off either. Tightening his fist slightly, he pushed further, deeper in, and Bruce tensed, creating wonderful friction.

Panting, Bruce arched up to meet Joker in a clumsy kiss, as with one huge tremble, they came in unison, bodies trapped in mindless pleasure, unable to stop and losing the energy to keep going rapidly. Warmth spread through Bruce as Joker growled, and Bruce let out a barely audible moan, such was his self-control.

Both lay spent where they had fallen, not wishing to move and face the awkward situation that would ensue, as Bruce curled his arms around Joker and placed a tiny kiss on his temple.

****

~ fin ~