Can't sleep!
So I am in San Diego with asshole and I can't sleep...I am sleeping on the floor because I can't stand the thought of touching him or being near him which sux because I am stuck here!! But it hurts thinking about this I mean really I feel my heart breaking with in my chest...and that is why I can not sleep it hurts it hurts my feelings and my heart that he had to lie to me...I want to puke I feel disgusting he just seems disgusting I don't know what to do...I can't sleep and I am in pain!! He didn't defend himself nothing no explination...he is an asshole...lucky me...I sure know how to pick them...I should have dumped his ass awhile ago and just gone for Kurtis...He is sweet I like him a lot...he gave me the best birthday ever this year and truthfully I can never get him out of my head...I really have a giant crush on him...but I have been held back because of Christopher...I dunno what to do...Like I want to leave Chris but I feel like I can't I don't know what else to do at all and I know if I did leave him it would tae some time for me to heal...I would be in pain for a litle bit...but I am in pain when I am with him I don't know what to do...I am so confused I want to cry...I am so sad and upset and I feel like I have no control...I hate it I want to die really I want to die!!