Changing Tides Entry: The Changing Tides (of the Female Gender)
Title: The Changing Tides (of the Female Gender)
Universe: Comics
Genre: Humor/Romance/Drama
Rating: PG/K+
Characters/Pairings: Batman/Catwoman, Robin/Batgirl, (mentioned) Joker/Harley
Word Count: 500
Summary:
Disclaimer: All characters belong to DC comics, not the author.
Robin's exasperated voice crackled through the Batcomm. "I don't even know what I said!"
"It may not even be what you said," Batman returned evenly, "but what you didn't say."
"Huh?"
"Look, Robin, Batgirl's a loyal confidante and a fighter. There's nobody else I'd prefer at my back besides you two. But she's still a woman."
"Of course she's a woman! I wouldn't have half the trouble I have with her if she wasn't!"
Batman chuckled. "If she wasn't the woman she is, you also wouldn't have that trouble, because you wouldn't be dating her. All jests aside, though, Robin, Alfred once told me something about women the first time I had trouble with a girl."
"You had girl trouble?"
"We all do."
"So what did Al tell you?"
"He told me women's moods change as often as the changing tides, but unlike the tide, they're completely unpredictable. You never know what you're getting when. Poison Ivy is one of our deadliest enemies but has a benevolent side."
"If you're a plant," grumbled Robin.
"I've known Harley Quinn to be serious."
"Serious? Harley?!"
"Watch her the next time she gets away and we imprison Joker."
"Point taken. But, Bats, how am I supposed to apologize if I don't even know what I did?!"
"It might be what you didn't do." He was about to say more when he noted movement on the building beneath him and smiled. "Batman out."
"But -- "
Batman flipped his Batcomm off and swung down onto the rooftop. The moon was full. He knew Selina's catnip was beginning to grow, and Spring meant mating season. He'd been enjoying their trysts every night lately but was caught off guard when she suddenly sprang at him. He grunted as the claws in her boots scratched his ribs. The motion threw him off course, and he landed, hard, on the building.
"Serves you right," Catwoman growled. The lithe, black cat draped around her neck swished its tail for her; both female's emerald eyes glowered down at him. "Sneaking up on a woman."
"I thought we were going to meet -- " Batman tried to get to his feet, but she sprang again, grabbing his cowl in both hands and jamming her knee into his face. He shoved her off and bounded to his feet while she was recovering. "Selina, I thought we were beyond this!"
"You thought wrong!" she hissed and snarled when she approached.
His keen eyes surveyed her; she hadn't stolen anything. There was no reason for him to fight her. "I don't want to fight you."
"Then don't follow." She swung off into the night, still snarling and left him to scratch his head in confusion. It wasn't her time of the month. He hadn't caught Bullock's interview where he'd stated that the Commissioner and the Batman were working together to bring her in. Nor did he know that she had a sick kitty at home or a new enemy in town. "Women," he muttered, recalling again Alfred's advice and wishing the waters of life could stay calm for once.
The End
Universe: Comics
Genre: Humor/Romance/Drama
Rating: PG/K+
Characters/Pairings: Batman/Catwoman, Robin/Batgirl, (mentioned) Joker/Harley
Word Count: 500
Summary:
Disclaimer: All characters belong to DC comics, not the author.
Robin's exasperated voice crackled through the Batcomm. "I don't even know what I said!"
"It may not even be what you said," Batman returned evenly, "but what you didn't say."
"Huh?"
"Look, Robin, Batgirl's a loyal confidante and a fighter. There's nobody else I'd prefer at my back besides you two. But she's still a woman."
"Of course she's a woman! I wouldn't have half the trouble I have with her if she wasn't!"
Batman chuckled. "If she wasn't the woman she is, you also wouldn't have that trouble, because you wouldn't be dating her. All jests aside, though, Robin, Alfred once told me something about women the first time I had trouble with a girl."
"You had girl trouble?"
"We all do."
"So what did Al tell you?"
"He told me women's moods change as often as the changing tides, but unlike the tide, they're completely unpredictable. You never know what you're getting when. Poison Ivy is one of our deadliest enemies but has a benevolent side."
"If you're a plant," grumbled Robin.
"I've known Harley Quinn to be serious."
"Serious? Harley?!"
"Watch her the next time she gets away and we imprison Joker."
"Point taken. But, Bats, how am I supposed to apologize if I don't even know what I did?!"
"It might be what you didn't do." He was about to say more when he noted movement on the building beneath him and smiled. "Batman out."
"But -- "
Batman flipped his Batcomm off and swung down onto the rooftop. The moon was full. He knew Selina's catnip was beginning to grow, and Spring meant mating season. He'd been enjoying their trysts every night lately but was caught off guard when she suddenly sprang at him. He grunted as the claws in her boots scratched his ribs. The motion threw him off course, and he landed, hard, on the building.
"Serves you right," Catwoman growled. The lithe, black cat draped around her neck swished its tail for her; both female's emerald eyes glowered down at him. "Sneaking up on a woman."
"I thought we were going to meet -- " Batman tried to get to his feet, but she sprang again, grabbing his cowl in both hands and jamming her knee into his face. He shoved her off and bounded to his feet while she was recovering. "Selina, I thought we were beyond this!"
"You thought wrong!" she hissed and snarled when she approached.
His keen eyes surveyed her; she hadn't stolen anything. There was no reason for him to fight her. "I don't want to fight you."
"Then don't follow." She swung off into the night, still snarling and left him to scratch his head in confusion. It wasn't her time of the month. He hadn't caught Bullock's interview where he'd stated that the Commissioner and the Batman were working together to bring her in. Nor did he know that she had a sick kitty at home or a new enemy in town. "Women," he muttered, recalling again Alfred's advice and wishing the waters of life could stay calm for once.
The End