One of those millennia
Have you ever felt like nothing really was going right? I'm not depressed right now (which is, honestly odd for how stuff has gone). I'm just wondering what the plan is for me. A "run-down," if you will, of what has been going on this summer (I'm leaving out names on purpose)
Positives:
A fair number of gigs
Survived jazz camp, and actually had a pretty good time (and the kids sounded good too)
My twin brother got married
I've won just over $1000 at the casino during June and July
I got a job interview with the Lincoln Symphony
I flirted with a waitress, got a name, and have kept flirting
I got to spend time one-on-one with a woman who I have missed and thought about a lot
Negatives:
Rejections letters (including the Symphony job)
Waitress has a boyfriend (of over a year as near I can tell)
Other woman is leaving the country for another year
I'm still single, in part because anything I've done to change that has blown up in my face
I'm still basically unemployed
Gigs only pay so much
I had many "friends" have weddings this summer, yet I got invited to none
My closest friends are either far away from me or are moving
We put my cat down in May
I mean, it's not like everything has gone to crap. I'm still alive. My extended family is still holding together, even if I have issues with some. My parents show me an incredible amount of love by letting me bide my time living in their house while I look for a job I want instead of just finding a job (though everybody - self included - is getting tired of me not working). Two months ago we got a new member to the family in the new sister-in-law, who is a keeper as far as I can tell. I've been getting out of the house fairly regularly.
Yeah, it's just a really funky time for me. It has been for over a year. I'm looking for a ray of sunshine. I've seen glimmers of it, but I hope for it to pierce the clouds to much more full effect instead of brief moments.
Positives:
A fair number of gigs
Survived jazz camp, and actually had a pretty good time (and the kids sounded good too)
My twin brother got married
I've won just over $1000 at the casino during June and July
I got a job interview with the Lincoln Symphony
I flirted with a waitress, got a name, and have kept flirting
I got to spend time one-on-one with a woman who I have missed and thought about a lot
Negatives:
Rejections letters (including the Symphony job)
Waitress has a boyfriend (of over a year as near I can tell)
Other woman is leaving the country for another year
I'm still single, in part because anything I've done to change that has blown up in my face
I'm still basically unemployed
Gigs only pay so much
I had many "friends" have weddings this summer, yet I got invited to none
My closest friends are either far away from me or are moving
We put my cat down in May
I mean, it's not like everything has gone to crap. I'm still alive. My extended family is still holding together, even if I have issues with some. My parents show me an incredible amount of love by letting me bide my time living in their house while I look for a job I want instead of just finding a job (though everybody - self included - is getting tired of me not working). Two months ago we got a new member to the family in the new sister-in-law, who is a keeper as far as I can tell. I've been getting out of the house fairly regularly.
Yeah, it's just a really funky time for me. It has been for over a year. I'm looking for a ray of sunshine. I've seen glimmers of it, but I hope for it to pierce the clouds to much more full effect instead of brief moments.