Life's sweet ironies...and elevators!
So, I was watching television today, and I saw one of those dumb ass "law firm" commercials, you know, the ones with a really bad actor ( A REAL CLIENT! ) who can't keep from moving their eyes from cue card to cue card...and feigning real excitement...
Well, this one lady came on and said, " I got arrested for a DUI, I'm so glad I called ( so and so ), I needed an aggressive lawyer to fight for my innocence!"
UM...HELLO...you stupid bitch...YOU WERE DRINKING AND DRIVING!...I'm pretty sure that makes you GUILTY.
Anyway, it was ironic nonetheless. I could rant and rave about how much drinking and driving makes me so pissed off. Like...how I got hit by one...and how two years ago someone lost their wife of one year on New Year's Eve due to a drunk driver and now their kid is without a mother and he is without the love of his life...all because someone was too bullheaded and outright retarded to not drink and drive.
I could also complain about Arizona, how when I got pulled over last week for driving in the carpool lane ( on accident, I swear. Which is why I didn't get a ticket. ) But, the ticket would have been 500 dollars and 2 points on my liscense. The sad part? That's harsher punishment for someone drinking and driving in AZ. How fucking pathetic.
So, I don't mean to sound cruel or judgemental or mean or anger anyone. But the blunt truth of the matter is...if you drink and drive...I hope the only person you kill is yourself.
On a lighter note ( somewhat ) I accompanied my friend ( Chris F for those of you who know him...and read this ) to court today to sign some divorce papers that his bitch of a wife ( now ex? ) suddenly dropped on him a few months ago out of the fucking blue. Well, I was on the first floor waiting for the elevator and when it opened, some old guy walked up and said, "Is this elevator going up?" Hehe. My insides laughed so hard. I'm sorry. I'm such a dick, but it was funny! I just replied, " Yep! Sure is. "
It's the first floor old man...where else is it gonna go?
But, I love old people. So it's all in good fun.
Also...I did this crazy dance in the elevator when some chics commented on my shirt. ( It's such a cool shirt. It's blue...and in faded white lettering reads, "This is my party shirt.") So...I danced for them on the ride up from floor 3 to 5.
...oddly, there were a lot of attractive women in the divorce court today. Apparantly, in Arizona, 75% of marriages end in divorce. Hmm. I do believe I'm rambling now...
Until next time.
"Going up?"
-B-
Well, this one lady came on and said, " I got arrested for a DUI, I'm so glad I called ( so and so ), I needed an aggressive lawyer to fight for my innocence!"
UM...HELLO...you stupid bitch...YOU WERE DRINKING AND DRIVING!...I'm pretty sure that makes you GUILTY.
Anyway, it was ironic nonetheless. I could rant and rave about how much drinking and driving makes me so pissed off. Like...how I got hit by one...and how two years ago someone lost their wife of one year on New Year's Eve due to a drunk driver and now their kid is without a mother and he is without the love of his life...all because someone was too bullheaded and outright retarded to not drink and drive.
I could also complain about Arizona, how when I got pulled over last week for driving in the carpool lane ( on accident, I swear. Which is why I didn't get a ticket. ) But, the ticket would have been 500 dollars and 2 points on my liscense. The sad part? That's harsher punishment for someone drinking and driving in AZ. How fucking pathetic.
So, I don't mean to sound cruel or judgemental or mean or anger anyone. But the blunt truth of the matter is...if you drink and drive...I hope the only person you kill is yourself.
On a lighter note ( somewhat ) I accompanied my friend ( Chris F for those of you who know him...and read this ) to court today to sign some divorce papers that his bitch of a wife ( now ex? ) suddenly dropped on him a few months ago out of the fucking blue. Well, I was on the first floor waiting for the elevator and when it opened, some old guy walked up and said, "Is this elevator going up?" Hehe. My insides laughed so hard. I'm sorry. I'm such a dick, but it was funny! I just replied, " Yep! Sure is. "
It's the first floor old man...where else is it gonna go?
But, I love old people. So it's all in good fun.
Also...I did this crazy dance in the elevator when some chics commented on my shirt. ( It's such a cool shirt. It's blue...and in faded white lettering reads, "This is my party shirt.") So...I danced for them on the ride up from floor 3 to 5.
...oddly, there were a lot of attractive women in the divorce court today. Apparantly, in Arizona, 75% of marriages end in divorce. Hmm. I do believe I'm rambling now...
Until next time.
"Going up?"
-B-