Complaints about the distance
Being apart is so hard. Sometimes I look at my map from my bed when I can't sleep and look at the distance between Ohio and California. I can't believe that its so far away. We are so lucky to live in this time period and be able to communicate so well when we are 2000 miles apart. I don't like to think about it because it makes me really sad. A few days of being really sad like that makes me break down and cry really hard. Otherwise I'm just kinda constantly depressed. He is here for me in heart, but its hard to be there in person. When he cries and is sad, it kills me that I can't hug him and make it better. I'm sure he feels the same way. Like right now I am itching so bad. It would be really nice for him to just rub me all over and make it better, but he can't.
Time also sucks. I am almost tired now, but we went to bed together almost an hour ago. I couldn't sleep. So I started writing this and listening to Enigma Variations because I know that he loves them. I think of him every time I hear them.
So after this crazy 2 year thing, we have to live in the same city. I just can't stand it any other way! But where? And what are we doing? AD, DMA? Teaching credential for him? Its hard to plan ahead with someone 2 years down the line when you don't even know what you are doing/want to do yourself. I think I want to get an AD. I'm thinking no for DMA...as long as I can still teach at a university. I think I have to start with city college, but I can work my way up.
He makes me happy. He helps me, calms me, loves me. Everything I want and need. He is there. I miss him so much. It's only been one week. And we have to do this for 2 years. I can't wait to see him. 32 days!! I guess we just have to take it one month at a time and just know that in 2 years we will be together regardless of plans and goals. We will make them work together.
Time also sucks. I am almost tired now, but we went to bed together almost an hour ago. I couldn't sleep. So I started writing this and listening to Enigma Variations because I know that he loves them. I think of him every time I hear them.
So after this crazy 2 year thing, we have to live in the same city. I just can't stand it any other way! But where? And what are we doing? AD, DMA? Teaching credential for him? Its hard to plan ahead with someone 2 years down the line when you don't even know what you are doing/want to do yourself. I think I want to get an AD. I'm thinking no for DMA...as long as I can still teach at a university. I think I have to start with city college, but I can work my way up.
He makes me happy. He helps me, calms me, loves me. Everything I want and need. He is there. I miss him so much. It's only been one week. And we have to do this for 2 years. I can't wait to see him. 32 days!! I guess we just have to take it one month at a time and just know that in 2 years we will be together regardless of plans and goals. We will make them work together.