Salsa Dancing
"An assumption develops that you cannot understand life and live life simultaneously. I do not agree entirely. Which is to say, I do not exactly disagree. I would say that life understood is life lived. But, the paradox is, Bug Me, that I can learn to love and make love to the paradoxes that bug me, and on really romantic evenings of self I go salsa dancing with my confusion."
So early last night I was in a desperate state almost, probably brought on by the hours of exam studying/bittersweet music i spent time on this afternoon/evening. I got a long pick-up conversation going with a good friend and ended up "salsa dancing" outside at two AM. It was definitely a "we don't have all the answers, but God we love life" conversation and put me back in my place.
Before I went to sleep I was thinking about something we had said.
When I was younger I was always looking forward to the next step. middle school to high school. driving to being adult. Now I've got getting through college and becoming twentyone. Life is long, but just long enough, and in fact, too short. It seems that everything unfolds at the right time. My twelve year old self was not ready to go to college and study. The workload seemed frightening and I wasn't prepared. I just think how beautiful life is that during all your teen years you spend eating, sleeping, watching movies, connecting with friends, doing homework and so forth is just a disguise. This is life's surprise for you. It seems like when that next step came you were more than ready for it. Behind all the menial tasks, getting your hands dirty, there was a larger preparation at work.
It's nice to know that preparation will be done in time for each next thing, and I'm therefore grateful for exams. We need it to keep us in pace with life.
Oh, and I got an offer to be a counselor at Camp Lohikan in the Poconos next summer...suweet.
So early last night I was in a desperate state almost, probably brought on by the hours of exam studying/bittersweet music i spent time on this afternoon/evening. I got a long pick-up conversation going with a good friend and ended up "salsa dancing" outside at two AM. It was definitely a "we don't have all the answers, but God we love life" conversation and put me back in my place.
Before I went to sleep I was thinking about something we had said.
When I was younger I was always looking forward to the next step. middle school to high school. driving to being adult. Now I've got getting through college and becoming twentyone. Life is long, but just long enough, and in fact, too short. It seems that everything unfolds at the right time. My twelve year old self was not ready to go to college and study. The workload seemed frightening and I wasn't prepared. I just think how beautiful life is that during all your teen years you spend eating, sleeping, watching movies, connecting with friends, doing homework and so forth is just a disguise. This is life's surprise for you. It seems like when that next step came you were more than ready for it. Behind all the menial tasks, getting your hands dirty, there was a larger preparation at work.
It's nice to know that preparation will be done in time for each next thing, and I'm therefore grateful for exams. We need it to keep us in pace with life.
Oh, and I got an offer to be a counselor at Camp Lohikan in the Poconos next summer...suweet.