The Crossroads
I think I made some real progress with my shrink today.
I was telling her about the EDF/Bank Overdraft Nightmare and the Debit Card In The Wash Debacle and she commented that I didn't seem as upset as usual over it.
"It's just that I can't be bothered anymore," I said. "I spent years punishing myself over my marriage breaking up and years freaking out about my mom being poison and kicking myself when things fucked up, and fucking the wrong type of women to try to make myself feel better an getting crazy upset over shit. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of punishing myself. All I want to do now is figure out what I can do and do it. And figure out what I can't do and stop worrying about it. I'm not going to kick myself when I'm down or waste mental energy on things I can't change. I'm letting myself out of the dog house."
She seemed pleased by this reaction.
I was telling her about the EDF/Bank Overdraft Nightmare and the Debit Card In The Wash Debacle and she commented that I didn't seem as upset as usual over it.
"It's just that I can't be bothered anymore," I said. "I spent years punishing myself over my marriage breaking up and years freaking out about my mom being poison and kicking myself when things fucked up, and fucking the wrong type of women to try to make myself feel better an getting crazy upset over shit. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of punishing myself. All I want to do now is figure out what I can do and do it. And figure out what I can't do and stop worrying about it. I'm not going to kick myself when I'm down or waste mental energy on things I can't change. I'm letting myself out of the dog house."
She seemed pleased by this reaction.