Trinity fic thing
As soon as I saw Trinity I had an idea that I knew I had to write. Circumstances prevented me from having an uninterrupted hour in order to get it right until yesterday. Hopefully it was worth the wait - if not, at least it's out of my head. :-)
John listened to McKay’s stammered apology with a feeling of deja vu.
“But I saved you `til last `cause, um, honestly, I would ... I would hate to think that recent events might have permanently dimmed your faith in my abilities, or your trust. At the very least, I hope I can earn that back.”
Full fucking circle, John thought and stifled a tired laugh. What he said aloud was, “That may take a while.”
“I see.” Rodney said dully, his face bleak.
It was weird that Rodney, who always saw the incongruous parallels in everything, was so unable to see the cosmic irony in this. As John considered his reply he flashed back to the conversation he had with Rodney several months ago.
~~~
John shoved his hands in his pockets and slouched in the doorway to prevent Rodney from leaving. “What do you want me to say? I was wrong, okay? I made a mistake.”
“Yes, you did. But the mistake wasn’t in trusting Chaya, necessarily, although in retrospect she was lying to you and you blithely put the entire mission at risk just so you could get a little space nookie.”
“Space nookie?”
“Yes, space nookie, and don’t chance the subject. Your mistake was that you didn’t trust everyone else when we tried to tell you that there was something else going on.”
“You’re just mad because you think I don’t trust you.”
“No, I’m infuriated because you don’t seem to get it! We need to trust you to do what’s right for Atlantis, not what’s right for your hormonally addled ego. That’s all we’ve got out here, Major. We’ve got a galaxy full of Wraith and who knows what other nasty surprises waiting to annihilate us and we haven’t got superior numbers or superior firepower. All we have is us and you threw us over for the first space bimbo that made goo-goo eyes at you.”
“So, what, we have to be paranoid and suspicious of everyone we meet? I’m not like that.”
“I’m not advocating ‘shoot first, ask questions later’ but a little bit of circumspection wouldn’t hurt.” Rodney sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face before meeting John’s eyes. “Ever since we got here I’ve been absolutely certain that I could trust you, trust your judgment. And you’ve never given me any reason to question that.”
John flinched. “Until now.”
“Until now,” Rodney agreed, holding John’s gaze unflinchingly.
John looked away as the full implication of what Rodney was saying sank in. He took a step back and leaned against the wall, his brow furrowed. “I just… I wasn’t…” he trailed off and then blew out a frustrated breath. “Do you think that we can start over? I admit I made a mistake but I think you owe me the chance to prove to you that your trust in me wasn’t misplaced.”
Rodney gave him an inscrutable look. “That might take some time.”
“Right,” John said. Turning sharply on his heel he headed down the corridor. He knew a dismissal when he heard one.
Rodney’s voice followed him as he walked slowly down the corridor. “But I’m sure you can do it, Major, if you really want to.”
~~~
John smirked as he turned to face Rodney, almost feeling bad for how smug he felt when he threw Rodney’s words back in his face, “But, I'm sure you can do it, if you really wanna try.”
John listened to McKay’s stammered apology with a feeling of deja vu.
“But I saved you `til last `cause, um, honestly, I would ... I would hate to think that recent events might have permanently dimmed your faith in my abilities, or your trust. At the very least, I hope I can earn that back.”
Full fucking circle, John thought and stifled a tired laugh. What he said aloud was, “That may take a while.”
“I see.” Rodney said dully, his face bleak.
It was weird that Rodney, who always saw the incongruous parallels in everything, was so unable to see the cosmic irony in this. As John considered his reply he flashed back to the conversation he had with Rodney several months ago.
~~~
John shoved his hands in his pockets and slouched in the doorway to prevent Rodney from leaving. “What do you want me to say? I was wrong, okay? I made a mistake.”
“Yes, you did. But the mistake wasn’t in trusting Chaya, necessarily, although in retrospect she was lying to you and you blithely put the entire mission at risk just so you could get a little space nookie.”
“Space nookie?”
“Yes, space nookie, and don’t chance the subject. Your mistake was that you didn’t trust everyone else when we tried to tell you that there was something else going on.”
“You’re just mad because you think I don’t trust you.”
“No, I’m infuriated because you don’t seem to get it! We need to trust you to do what’s right for Atlantis, not what’s right for your hormonally addled ego. That’s all we’ve got out here, Major. We’ve got a galaxy full of Wraith and who knows what other nasty surprises waiting to annihilate us and we haven’t got superior numbers or superior firepower. All we have is us and you threw us over for the first space bimbo that made goo-goo eyes at you.”
“So, what, we have to be paranoid and suspicious of everyone we meet? I’m not like that.”
“I’m not advocating ‘shoot first, ask questions later’ but a little bit of circumspection wouldn’t hurt.” Rodney sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face before meeting John’s eyes. “Ever since we got here I’ve been absolutely certain that I could trust you, trust your judgment. And you’ve never given me any reason to question that.”
John flinched. “Until now.”
“Until now,” Rodney agreed, holding John’s gaze unflinchingly.
John looked away as the full implication of what Rodney was saying sank in. He took a step back and leaned against the wall, his brow furrowed. “I just… I wasn’t…” he trailed off and then blew out a frustrated breath. “Do you think that we can start over? I admit I made a mistake but I think you owe me the chance to prove to you that your trust in me wasn’t misplaced.”
Rodney gave him an inscrutable look. “That might take some time.”
“Right,” John said. Turning sharply on his heel he headed down the corridor. He knew a dismissal when he heard one.
Rodney’s voice followed him as he walked slowly down the corridor. “But I’m sure you can do it, Major, if you really want to.”
~~~
John smirked as he turned to face Rodney, almost feeling bad for how smug he felt when he threw Rodney’s words back in his face, “But, I'm sure you can do it, if you really wanna try.”