(no subject)

[baritonechick]

So the world turns and Ive noticed that everyone I know has grown out of their baby face...but me...I still have mine...Its like I just stopped growing...I do not know what to think anymore...Im growing up relationships will get differnt and way more serious...high school is over for me...now its college...I look at what im leaving behind and it makes me sad...maybe I think that I can hide my feelings by coloring my hair...its not working...im growing up...its scarry...I have run into enemies and I have run into friends...I have had good times great times and horrible times...Im leaving a life behind that I have known all my life.. its scarry...in fact it is down right terrifying....the next years of my life I have to learn so many things...my sister I know she does not believe that I am mature...but I am more mature than she will ever know...I feel that she sees right through me and does not even stop to care or even open her eyes...regardless of what anybody says I am shy...you may or may not have seen it.....I get shy really quickly....I get embarrassed really quickly....I am easly scared....my emotions are like a rollercoaster.....I have not found who I am yet...and it scares me...I am in for it and I know it....For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline..(2 Tim. 1:7) I get told by my parents that I love too much...I love people too much...they say that when I get into college that I need to watch out becasue I will get used...they do not know that I have been used so many times before that I can tell when I meet the person if they are going to use me or not.....you know what...I just let them do it...its became numb to me....I have no feelings tword it...im just simply here...

Liebe Immer.
Penny