Big words from a little man....
Rock Sound have been ignoring my emails, the gits. Either that or they are all miraculously disappearing or they are just soooo busy that they cant take the time to either give me work or have the balls to tell me they aren't going to. Even though they are just one publication and I know there are others, it's still hard not to take it just a little personally. I got the idea everything was chipper after i left there and I really enjoyed working for them. What pisses me off the most is that I actually thought I'd made a decent mate there and all, but even he is ignoring me. I have a good mind to go to the office to make a stand and ask them flat out, but that's easier said than done. All the staff are stationed in one room and the idea of taking rejection in front of a group of established journalist is just a little bit unnerving.
I have no idea what I did that was so wrong. Did I say something hideously horrible when I was drunk? Was my writing shit? But then the editor gave me a positive work placement report after I left so it makes next to no sense. It could be said I don’t take rejection well and maybe that I'm paranoid! But what I take worse is false friendship. I could be jumping to conclusions but it really doesn't take much effort to return an email or phone call. With the way Rock Sound constantly reinforces the fact that it has 'ethics', unlike other mainstream music publications, you think they would treat people just a tad bit better. To be fair it is not all of them. While I actually worked there it was great and it was only really the editor who was a bit funny with me. He was an odd one. He would spend the day ignoring me only to suddenly throw a big interview my way later. Never could quite work him out. Somehow I figure this stems from him. I wish they'd just be straight with me. Maybe they think me too insecure to handle it. Still at least I have work in print now. A mild stepping stone, but one none the less.
Apart from that though (and excuse the rant) I'm feeling good and much better than last time I posted. A few good nights out have seen to that and a few loved up chats have shown me I still have a lot of close friends that actually give a shit. So yeah I feel a little more optimistic and less worried about the end of uni and the start of the REAL world. Whatever the fuck that means. I have no idea what the future holds but I will not be forced into a nine to five job I hate. I will make it into the music industry if I have to wedge my way in with a sledgehammer (metaphorically speaking of course). Whether it be as a journalist or working for a record label. Music and writing is who I am and I cant see myself anywhere else. Least of all in the ruthless world of the tabloid journalist.
So yeah fuck Rock Sound. Should I ever be in a position of power I vow here and now never to treat people like dirt. I suppose everything happens for a reason. You can either continue the vicious circle and be the same when you make it, or else learn from it and never forget how it feels to be on the receiving end. I need to toughen up as well. I take things far too personally. Although it can be hard to shake old habits, no matter how aware of them you are. It's a work in progress I guess. This month I've got the time to chill out since I've got all my uni work done for this semester. The calm before the storm when I have to start my dissertation. It's gonna be a busy few months after Feb. But I will face it with renewed optimism. Later.
Watch Rock Sound email me the day after I post this and then I will feel guilty.
I have no idea what I did that was so wrong. Did I say something hideously horrible when I was drunk? Was my writing shit? But then the editor gave me a positive work placement report after I left so it makes next to no sense. It could be said I don’t take rejection well and maybe that I'm paranoid! But what I take worse is false friendship. I could be jumping to conclusions but it really doesn't take much effort to return an email or phone call. With the way Rock Sound constantly reinforces the fact that it has 'ethics', unlike other mainstream music publications, you think they would treat people just a tad bit better. To be fair it is not all of them. While I actually worked there it was great and it was only really the editor who was a bit funny with me. He was an odd one. He would spend the day ignoring me only to suddenly throw a big interview my way later. Never could quite work him out. Somehow I figure this stems from him. I wish they'd just be straight with me. Maybe they think me too insecure to handle it. Still at least I have work in print now. A mild stepping stone, but one none the less.
Apart from that though (and excuse the rant) I'm feeling good and much better than last time I posted. A few good nights out have seen to that and a few loved up chats have shown me I still have a lot of close friends that actually give a shit. So yeah I feel a little more optimistic and less worried about the end of uni and the start of the REAL world. Whatever the fuck that means. I have no idea what the future holds but I will not be forced into a nine to five job I hate. I will make it into the music industry if I have to wedge my way in with a sledgehammer (metaphorically speaking of course). Whether it be as a journalist or working for a record label. Music and writing is who I am and I cant see myself anywhere else. Least of all in the ruthless world of the tabloid journalist.
So yeah fuck Rock Sound. Should I ever be in a position of power I vow here and now never to treat people like dirt. I suppose everything happens for a reason. You can either continue the vicious circle and be the same when you make it, or else learn from it and never forget how it feels to be on the receiving end. I need to toughen up as well. I take things far too personally. Although it can be hard to shake old habits, no matter how aware of them you are. It's a work in progress I guess. This month I've got the time to chill out since I've got all my uni work done for this semester. The calm before the storm when I have to start my dissertation. It's gonna be a busy few months after Feb. But I will face it with renewed optimism. Later.
Watch Rock Sound email me the day after I post this and then I will feel guilty.