...smoke and mirriors no longer...
Just when you think all hope is lost you fall into something beatuiful and you realise you werent that bad off... the past few weeks have been awsome everything is falling into place with friends, family, and future. i'v realized what made my life so horrid and i liberated myself of thoes nuincences. it scares me how much i'v grown in the past few months, things that used to matter, dont and things i used to disregard as being insignificant have come into play with shaping my life and who i am. i have learned to take life as is and have then best time with it, without hurting others (in the exception of being brutally honest). Lately i have sat back and looked at highschool life and noticed really, how peaty and pathetic people can be it makes me discusted that just a few months ago i was "all about it." its quite sad actually to know what type of person i used to be... not saying i was horrible but just for the pure fact that i felt the need to know anything and everything that was going on and disregarded the feelings of others in the crossfire. i'v learned that i can have fun without the need to overplay what i do. but in htis process there are people and friends in my life that helped me to reach this state of mind,the people who were there for me although at times my actions werent truely justified and for that i thank them to list a few...Rhea, Jill, Bailey, Jamie, April and probalbly a whole lot more that i forgot but these where the main ones... i love you girls so much !!!