I am Patient Zero in the new zombie apocalypse
Conversation with the doctor on Saturday morning:
Doctor: What brings you here today?
Me: This. [shows doctor large, red-and-white, bumpy swelling on left calf] It's been like that for at least a month.
Doctor: Hmmm. Okay, I have to be honest with you: I really don't know what it is.
Me: [laughs] Well, I'm glad you're being honest.
-----------
The doc's opinion was that it wasn't a tick bite. She said it's most likely either an infected mosquito bite, or a general overreaction of my immune system (i.e. hives) triggered by the mosquito bite.
So now it's antibiotic ointment twice a day, and hydrocortizone ointment as needed to suppress itching. If it doesn't improve in a week, then we try something else.
If it spreads any further and I start to show a mania for eating brains, you'll know why.