(looks at watch) wow it's been a long time

[baralexbar]

it's been quite some time since i updated this. and my thoughts now are quite different than the ones below. Let's get to business. First issue:Alyssa. I really don't care anymore. From what I can make of it she's started doing lots of drugs lately and probably having sex with her new pothead boyfriend. And since she's not really tried to keep up any contact with me (I woulda called her but idk where the fuck to reach her) I just don't care what happens to her now. I gave up so much and stood behind her through all her problems for so long and now to just leave me in the cold like that, I think that's beyond reason enough for me to not care anymore. I can't say I've totally moved on though cuz sometimes at school i see her and her's and i just wanna kick something. I feel stupid over it. I don't know why it bothers me. She doesn't give a rat's ass about me so why should I care.

Anyways, enough of that bothersome SHIT!

I'm going to homecoming, with Hannah. It's weird though cuz she has a b/f but he just isnt going to homecoming so now i've been chosen. idk what to think about hannah. part of me likes her but i dont really want to cuz i dont think she likes me at all, and i just dont wanna be hurt like before. but i do like other girls in my life. i dont know them too too well but i'd really like 2. they all seem like they RIP MADDD!

so ya i really hope alyssa sees this.

and if youre reading this Alyssa, i've got one question for you...

When did I stop mattering to you?

-Alex-