what do we have here
spinning spinning... click click.. click and the emotion today is.... what the ... depression. it has been a while. why now? well frankly failure. the list of my fuck ups lately with people are numerous. most the time my insensitive off hand comments are due to sheer honesty and blunt observation, but it seems i am more jaded and bitter making it more frequent. my demand from people and standards have risen. its frustrating knowing that i havent changed in any desired fashion. but it seems it is also becoming winter. the time every year when sadness grips me. i will shake it. but till then time is murderous. the days, hours, minuets, seconds all creep and rend my patients. i want to move forward but that hyper 8 year old that rules my positive emotions wont let me. me at 8 years old skinny and in love with dinosaurs and rodeo. hopping around wearing a cape pointing at the tv demanding junkyard dog meet me in a title match. see i just made myself laugh... silver lining bitches.