You All Should Come Visit Me!
You will know when you hit Richwoods when you see the trailer at the crossroads proudly flying the confederate flag. From there, turn into the town. You'll pass no less than 4 or 5 churches in the mile it takes to get to my house. If you pass another 4 or 5, you've probably gone too far. You'll also inevitably see at least a few pick-up trucks, completely coated in mud, that could run over any mid-sized car as if it were an actual monster truck. That's what they drive out here. Depending on the direction you are coming from, it's likely you will see one of the big mud tracks, labeled as dirt bike tracks, but known around here as the “mud runs.” If you see a second one, you've gone too far. My road is between the two. Luckily, it's easy to find my house. Just stay on the one paved road. Don't get on any of the countless gravel ones. I'm right in the middle of town. If you see a bunch of firetrucks (not including the ones at the fire station), you've found me. Those trucks are my Grandpa's collection.
So I've noticed a few things in the past month or so living here. First of all, moving back after living near the city for so long has been a pretty big culture shock. The overall IQ of the people down here is drastically lower, and it shows without talking to them, entirely through observation of their behaviors. Talking to them proves this, if you doubted it before. Take the example of the confederate flag at the entrance to my town. I've also seen countless trucks sporting this logo, as well as a large handful of tattoos. Not only this, but taking it a step further, I've never seen so many swastikas posted around. I thought that was a fairly taboo symbol in the world today, but down here, it seems so common. I've seen it etched into bathroom stalls at least three times now, and I've seen two people with the swastika proudly inked on their own body. One of them looked like it may have been ink pen (very badly drawn, might I add), but the other was a professional tattoo, for sure.
Speaking of tattoos, it seems everyone and their grandmother (very literally, not even exaggerating) has tattoos down here. While living near the city, I've always been an advocate for body art. I love tattoos, and think that, if done right, they are a beautiful way to express yourself, but down here, some people have gone too far! I could not even begin to imagine how to start counting the sheer number of horrible tattoos I've seen. Aside from ones that are just tasteless (the swastika and confederate flags, for example), it's hard to hide my look of disgust at the horrible, blurred, green-ish tattoos on all the wrinkled skin of every aging redneck.
On the plus side, if you ever want to know someone's favorite band down here, all you have to do is look at their arms/back/chest and you're sure to find a permanent visual commemoration to their favorite musical artist. I'll let you in on a secret, though. Around here, it's most likely going to involve clowns. I did see one lady with just the word “Staind” tattooed right on her chest. I don't know why, but I found it ironically funny, considering a stain is generally an undesirable permanent mark.
Anyway, moving on, I've noticed a strange trend in the age around here, especially working at Wal-Mart. The average age at my old store was pretty high, but there were a fair share of young-to-middle age people. At this new store, old people reign supreme. They make up easily between 80-90% of my daily customers. Even more strange is the drastic number of babies around. Everyone around here has babies. My guess is that it's because uneducated people with nothing better to do (and trust me, there is NOTHING to do around here) just have a lot of unprotected sex. Of the 10-20% of younger people, I'd be hard pressed to find 1% not a proud parent. I mean, look at the vast majority of my high school graduating class. I'd have to actually check to verify this, but I'd estimate out of the 42 graduates, easily 30-35 have kids, and I'd guess between 25-30 are single parents, either unmarried or already divorced.
Other random observations I've made, though less important than the previously mentioned ones, are that everyone writes checks here, and those who don't pay with big bills a lot. Also, for some reason, there is a drastic shortage of $10 bills here, which I can't explain. Also, I've seen more injury braces here than I thought existed in the world. At least 2 or 3 of my coworkers, maybe more, have a single giant black boot on one foot, and I see them on customers all the time. I also have seen a lot of leg braces and a few arm braces. My guess is there is a doctor around here that has a sweet contract with a company that makes these braces.
Please note, and maybe I should have put this as a disclaimer at the beginning, that in this post, I am not claiming this is how everyone acts. Not everyone is a racist, unintelligent, horribly inked baby factory. There have been some fairly normal people, but believe me, they are few and far between. These are just my observations, and are almost all generalizations. I can't really post every detail about every person I've come in contact with, but I've just noticed a large majority shares a lot of these traits. If I didn't have my friends down here to escape to, I think I'd literally go crazy being stuck down here. This is my blog, anyway, so let me post what I want. I'm sure not many of you even made it this far, save for those few who I know hang on my every word (you know who you are), and to you, thanks for being my fans. ^_~
So I've noticed a few things in the past month or so living here. First of all, moving back after living near the city for so long has been a pretty big culture shock. The overall IQ of the people down here is drastically lower, and it shows without talking to them, entirely through observation of their behaviors. Talking to them proves this, if you doubted it before. Take the example of the confederate flag at the entrance to my town. I've also seen countless trucks sporting this logo, as well as a large handful of tattoos. Not only this, but taking it a step further, I've never seen so many swastikas posted around. I thought that was a fairly taboo symbol in the world today, but down here, it seems so common. I've seen it etched into bathroom stalls at least three times now, and I've seen two people with the swastika proudly inked on their own body. One of them looked like it may have been ink pen (very badly drawn, might I add), but the other was a professional tattoo, for sure.
Speaking of tattoos, it seems everyone and their grandmother (very literally, not even exaggerating) has tattoos down here. While living near the city, I've always been an advocate for body art. I love tattoos, and think that, if done right, they are a beautiful way to express yourself, but down here, some people have gone too far! I could not even begin to imagine how to start counting the sheer number of horrible tattoos I've seen. Aside from ones that are just tasteless (the swastika and confederate flags, for example), it's hard to hide my look of disgust at the horrible, blurred, green-ish tattoos on all the wrinkled skin of every aging redneck.
On the plus side, if you ever want to know someone's favorite band down here, all you have to do is look at their arms/back/chest and you're sure to find a permanent visual commemoration to their favorite musical artist. I'll let you in on a secret, though. Around here, it's most likely going to involve clowns. I did see one lady with just the word “Staind” tattooed right on her chest. I don't know why, but I found it ironically funny, considering a stain is generally an undesirable permanent mark.
Anyway, moving on, I've noticed a strange trend in the age around here, especially working at Wal-Mart. The average age at my old store was pretty high, but there were a fair share of young-to-middle age people. At this new store, old people reign supreme. They make up easily between 80-90% of my daily customers. Even more strange is the drastic number of babies around. Everyone around here has babies. My guess is that it's because uneducated people with nothing better to do (and trust me, there is NOTHING to do around here) just have a lot of unprotected sex. Of the 10-20% of younger people, I'd be hard pressed to find 1% not a proud parent. I mean, look at the vast majority of my high school graduating class. I'd have to actually check to verify this, but I'd estimate out of the 42 graduates, easily 30-35 have kids, and I'd guess between 25-30 are single parents, either unmarried or already divorced.
Other random observations I've made, though less important than the previously mentioned ones, are that everyone writes checks here, and those who don't pay with big bills a lot. Also, for some reason, there is a drastic shortage of $10 bills here, which I can't explain. Also, I've seen more injury braces here than I thought existed in the world. At least 2 or 3 of my coworkers, maybe more, have a single giant black boot on one foot, and I see them on customers all the time. I also have seen a lot of leg braces and a few arm braces. My guess is there is a doctor around here that has a sweet contract with a company that makes these braces.
Please note, and maybe I should have put this as a disclaimer at the beginning, that in this post, I am not claiming this is how everyone acts. Not everyone is a racist, unintelligent, horribly inked baby factory. There have been some fairly normal people, but believe me, they are few and far between. These are just my observations, and are almost all generalizations. I can't really post every detail about every person I've come in contact with, but I've just noticed a large majority shares a lot of these traits. If I didn't have my friends down here to escape to, I think I'd literally go crazy being stuck down here. This is my blog, anyway, so let me post what I want. I'm sure not many of you even made it this far, save for those few who I know hang on my every word (you know who you are), and to you, thanks for being my fans. ^_~