IC: Something seems off
Alfred slowly pulls himself up from bed, being careful not to disturb his companion. Striding nude across the floor of his room, he walks into his huge closet and shuts the door. He turns on the small lamp inside, and simply stares at himself in the mirror for several minutes. Alfred runs his hands over his body, feeling the texture and every scar along his flesh. He examines the tattoo work all over his flesh, hiding the numerous scars. He runs his hands up his face, fingertips barely grazing the skin as he looks through his hair. Even Alfred's eyes hid scars, but that of the emotional and mental type.
Is it supposed to hurt like this?
It had been several weeks since Alfred left the Guardians. He tried to keep it as clean, as separate as possible. He sat down, spent weeks agonizing over the choice. Talking with friends and family, consulting with his Peers in the Order, observations and prayer...all avenues led Alfred to the same choice. It was the right thing to do, both emotionally and mentally. He had rarely been so sure of a choice in his life. But ever sense that moment, it was if he had cut out a piece of his heart. First it started as a prick, but was growing to an empty feeling deep inside his soul.
Will I ever be whole again..?
Alfred tried examining other Orders. Too many people were excited to get an ex-Guardian...they always wanted him for his sills. They cared about his abilities, his training and his years of ruthless behavior. They wanted Sparkles, they wanted the image. It was a very few people who actually wanted Alfred, who asked him if he was OK or even wanted to know why he quit the Guardians in the first place. He felt like a cheap piece of meat, and so many Mages wanted a slice. Alfred was sick of it, sick of everything involved in the politics and strife of the Orders.
Will anyone want me for me...?
Alfred looks back at the sleeping man in his bed, and smiles softly. He walks back over and kneels next to the side of the bed, gently stroking Dario's face. He gazes down and admires every handsome feature on his face. Alfred thinks to his cousin and her bubbly smile, and to his best friend patiently (but nervously) awaiting her own special moment. Bending down and lightly kissing Dario's forehead, Alfred climbs back into bed and curls up next to him, wrapping an arm around Dario's waist and closing his eyes.
I have what I need right here...life is going to get better from here.
Is it supposed to hurt like this?
It had been several weeks since Alfred left the Guardians. He tried to keep it as clean, as separate as possible. He sat down, spent weeks agonizing over the choice. Talking with friends and family, consulting with his Peers in the Order, observations and prayer...all avenues led Alfred to the same choice. It was the right thing to do, both emotionally and mentally. He had rarely been so sure of a choice in his life. But ever sense that moment, it was if he had cut out a piece of his heart. First it started as a prick, but was growing to an empty feeling deep inside his soul.
Will I ever be whole again..?
Alfred tried examining other Orders. Too many people were excited to get an ex-Guardian...they always wanted him for his sills. They cared about his abilities, his training and his years of ruthless behavior. They wanted Sparkles, they wanted the image. It was a very few people who actually wanted Alfred, who asked him if he was OK or even wanted to know why he quit the Guardians in the first place. He felt like a cheap piece of meat, and so many Mages wanted a slice. Alfred was sick of it, sick of everything involved in the politics and strife of the Orders.
Will anyone want me for me...?
Alfred looks back at the sleeping man in his bed, and smiles softly. He walks back over and kneels next to the side of the bed, gently stroking Dario's face. He gazes down and admires every handsome feature on his face. Alfred thinks to his cousin and her bubbly smile, and to his best friend patiently (but nervously) awaiting her own special moment. Bending down and lightly kissing Dario's forehead, Alfred climbs back into bed and curls up next to him, wrapping an arm around Dario's waist and closing his eyes.
I have what I need right here...life is going to get better from here.