Clearing my mind...
I have alot on my mind right now that's been driving me CRAZY. First off Solo and ensemble is this weekend. I don't think i'm as ready as i could be. I decided to do a class 1 solo this year, and i think maybe i've bitten off more than i can chew. I just hope i don't choke 2 bad. I choked today when i was practicing with mrs klas becuz i'm shy when it comes to playing if front of ppl. I don't really know y. 2nite @ dinner my mom really pissed me off cuz she was asking me if i was ready for saturday. I was like as ready as im gonna be i guess. I've already decided that if i dont' get a first division i won't be 2 upset. Its not gonna be the end of world. I'll just have to bite my lip and move on with my life. Apparently that wasn't good enuff for my mom. She said that she hasn't heard me practice enuff to suit her and if i dont' get a first division that i would be grounded from "a few things" in other words means from seeing Jay. I was soo pissed at her for saying that. 1) she works real late and shes not even around to hear me practice when i do practice at home. For once my dad was on my side and told me that it didnt' matter to him what i got as long as i put my heart in to it and did the very best i could do. I swear sometimes my mom is just too self absorbed. Our solo is in trouble too. I dont' think we've had enough practice time to just really work out the kinks. We haven't had help from mrs klas becuz shes too busy for us, and the only thing Mr.Cox has done is said "Work with a metronome," knowing that that drives me INSANE and i can't work with a metronome that well. UGH!! I guess i want our ensemble to do well is for kayla. This is her chance to earn her letterman and i really want it for her. That's one of the lessons i've learned as freshman. If u dont' want something, atleast want it for the people around u that do, and i really want it for kayla cuz i luv her and shes a good friend of mine. WE're having this recital thingy Friday nite..and i'm real nervous about that cuz we're playing in front of the ENTIRE HS band and the middle school memebers that r going to solo and ensemble 2. I guess im just afraid that i'm gonna mess up and they're gonna make fun of me. I know its kinda dumb to be scared of that but critsism from ur peers is the worst thing in the world.
One of my favorite teachers in the HS, my spanish teacher Senor Valdez had a heartattach and is in the hospital. I miss him sooo much and i hope he gets better and gets back to school soon cuz spanish class isn't the same w/ out him. All we have r subs and we watch movies and its just not the same. Plus i dont' have neone to make fun of me becuz i think i'm mexican, and no one can make fun of me like senor cuz thats like a joke in itself. If ur in my spanish class then u know exactly what i'm talking about. hehe.
Our tuba player did something i dunno i didn't hear the whole story in band today but is in the hospital for 31 days. That sux ass cuz contest is like in a week and a half and if we dont' have a tuba player we aren't gonna do well, and if we don't do well we'll get laughed at and have a VERY PISSED OFF MR COX, and NO ONE wants that to happen.
I haven't been keeping up on my studying habits like i should be doing. I've been doing other stuff with my life for my pleasure instead of busting my butt so that i will get into a good college. ( i know it sounds crazy but i gotta start now if i wanna go somewhere decent and do something decent with my life.)I'm in danger of getting my first B in English. I have NEVER GOTTEN A B! do u know what that could do to my GPA? Thats sooo scary.
I haven't seen julio in a week and its driving me crazy. I made a joke @ school that i gave jj up for lent cuz thats what if feels like. I wanna see him soo bad. I wanna just hold him...and look into his eyes. Even if thats all we did i would be happy with just that. Just to get to see him. It was kinda of funny J told me that 2day this gurl that he used to like asked him to prom and he turned her down. I was like Y? he goes cuz i don't really wanna go. I was like ok..so we talked for a bit and then he got a beep. He clicked over and it was ANOTHER GURL ASKING HIM TO PROM. I was like g my baby is a sexi bitch and all the girls want him to be their date to the prom! he said no again. I know that deep down i bet he wants to go to the prom, so y wont' he just go with one of the girls that asked him? i mean YES i would be kinda mad but if thats what he REALLY wanted ...then thats what i want for him. He was like yea..but i know u wanna go. And yes that is the truth. If he was gonna go to his senior prom i hoped it would be with ME his GF but...i don't want everything he does to be about me. IF he wanted to go and hang out with a friend for one nite at a dance then i would understand and i'd want him to do cuz it makes him happy. I would be mad but as long as he's happy then i'm gonna be happy. I just want him to be happy with whatever it is that he decides to do. I luv him sooo much.
Well...this entry is longer than i anticipated. I guess i had more on my mind than i thought. Well...gotta go call J. Until next time...
One of my favorite teachers in the HS, my spanish teacher Senor Valdez had a heartattach and is in the hospital. I miss him sooo much and i hope he gets better and gets back to school soon cuz spanish class isn't the same w/ out him. All we have r subs and we watch movies and its just not the same. Plus i dont' have neone to make fun of me becuz i think i'm mexican, and no one can make fun of me like senor cuz thats like a joke in itself. If ur in my spanish class then u know exactly what i'm talking about. hehe.
Our tuba player did something i dunno i didn't hear the whole story in band today but is in the hospital for 31 days. That sux ass cuz contest is like in a week and a half and if we dont' have a tuba player we aren't gonna do well, and if we don't do well we'll get laughed at and have a VERY PISSED OFF MR COX, and NO ONE wants that to happen.
I haven't been keeping up on my studying habits like i should be doing. I've been doing other stuff with my life for my pleasure instead of busting my butt so that i will get into a good college. ( i know it sounds crazy but i gotta start now if i wanna go somewhere decent and do something decent with my life.)I'm in danger of getting my first B in English. I have NEVER GOTTEN A B! do u know what that could do to my GPA? Thats sooo scary.
I haven't seen julio in a week and its driving me crazy. I made a joke @ school that i gave jj up for lent cuz thats what if feels like. I wanna see him soo bad. I wanna just hold him...and look into his eyes. Even if thats all we did i would be happy with just that. Just to get to see him. It was kinda of funny J told me that 2day this gurl that he used to like asked him to prom and he turned her down. I was like Y? he goes cuz i don't really wanna go. I was like ok..so we talked for a bit and then he got a beep. He clicked over and it was ANOTHER GURL ASKING HIM TO PROM. I was like g my baby is a sexi bitch and all the girls want him to be their date to the prom! he said no again. I know that deep down i bet he wants to go to the prom, so y wont' he just go with one of the girls that asked him? i mean YES i would be kinda mad but if thats what he REALLY wanted ...then thats what i want for him. He was like yea..but i know u wanna go. And yes that is the truth. If he was gonna go to his senior prom i hoped it would be with ME his GF but...i don't want everything he does to be about me. IF he wanted to go and hang out with a friend for one nite at a dance then i would understand and i'd want him to do cuz it makes him happy. I would be mad but as long as he's happy then i'm gonna be happy. I just want him to be happy with whatever it is that he decides to do. I luv him sooo much.
Well...this entry is longer than i anticipated. I guess i had more on my mind than i thought. Well...gotta go call J. Until next time...