In The First Two Days Of Being In So Cal...

[bananasforever]

So when i arrived on friday morning at 10am i was greeted by Brittany at the airport. We embraced in a long very much needed hug with kisses on each others cheeks. We made the long silent trip to Riverside in 20-30 min. I was very scared of what to say and what not to do. I wanted so badly to just have her pull over and stop the car so that we could embrace in another long and very well needed hug but i didnt because i could tell that i was already being that person that i once was, the person who hangs al over someone. So i have tried my best to not be all over her any shape or form. Friday night i got to meet the guy named "Marshmallow". Well lets just say that he was not what i was expecting. Let say i just got really upset with myself over him. Oh my god i just find that whole situtation to be a very be joke. But as of last night i understand where she is coming from with him because i did the same thing at the party we went to. But anyways we met up with "Marshmallow" and his friends so that we could got to a party but that didnt happen everyone backed out and we drove around for five hours or so but hey i cant complain because i got to see a side of what it was that i was so scared about. So any how we went to a party last night and i had so much fun i got to me all of Brittanys new friends most of them seem very "chill" as britt would say. But i just saw to much that hurt and i just allow things to go down because i know how she is when she is at a party of this kind with me and how she is with out me. So i allowed her to do what she wanted even tho i was not so cool on the ideas i just wanted to see her have a good time and not worring about screwing anything up between the two of us. So what do i do? well i will tel you, i ran into a guy from the last party i was at which was monster massive his name is Brad but we cal him Be-Rad. His guy was fun to play with but then whtn he thought that he could get some from britt and i, i started to trip out because im not so kewl with guys has i thought. Im asctually deathly afrid of them and so last night proved to me that i am 100% lesbian. lol i know i have always called myself one but was never true to it but not im sticing to it I AM 100% LESBIAN I'M A LESBIAN!!!!

And baby if you read this i just waneted to vent a bit so dont take anything the wrong way i dont see how that would happen but just if it does. JUST REMEMBER YOU ARE THE ONLY OWNER OF THIS HEART OF MINE NO ONE ELSE CAN AND WILL EVER HAVE IT BECAUSE IT BELONGS TO YOU AND NO ONE ELSE. I LOVE YOU BABY GIRL.