New York snow this time of year, there's nothing more beautiful to me, except for you...
Let me just start by saying this: I love my city.
This morning I got up a little on the early side for having the day off, and ventured downtown for little shopping and some coffee. Now, what I purchased, where I drank my coffee and what book are read are not important. What is, is what I realized on my way back.
I was talking to my mom on the phone and telling her I was on my way back home from downtown, and she said "did you go all by yourself?" And yes, yes I did. But the thing is, this would bother some people. Going out alone. Making big decisions about big purchases alone. Going to the mall alone. Sitting down in a restaurant all alone. Enjoying a hot cup of coffee alone. But today, I was content doing all of these things alone. I was sitting eating breakfast, surrounded by people having intelligent, philosophical conversations, people catching up, couples enjoying breakfast on a Thursday morning. And there I was, sitting all alone in a booth obviously made for two, enjoying a bagel and a book, and not even caring I was alone. I can't remember being this content in a long time.
I've realized that even though I may not have this huge network of friends so I constantly have companionship, the small, intimate network of friends I have are some of the most amazing people in the world. I'd rather sit all alone with a really good book in a restaurant than sit with someone else having superficial conversation any day. It makes life less stressful when you have people who only better everything about you and them.
Walking back home I just felt this sense of calm and relief. Like something that had been bothering me for a long time was suddenly gone. And if feels so good. I'm not sure what it is, or where it went, but I suddenly feel so at ease. I was never stressed or depressed or angry, but for some reason I just feel different. Who knows what happened in my sleep or what they put in the great coffee I had this morning, but something has changed, and I like it.
This morning I got up a little on the early side for having the day off, and ventured downtown for little shopping and some coffee. Now, what I purchased, where I drank my coffee and what book are read are not important. What is, is what I realized on my way back.
I was talking to my mom on the phone and telling her I was on my way back home from downtown, and she said "did you go all by yourself?" And yes, yes I did. But the thing is, this would bother some people. Going out alone. Making big decisions about big purchases alone. Going to the mall alone. Sitting down in a restaurant all alone. Enjoying a hot cup of coffee alone. But today, I was content doing all of these things alone. I was sitting eating breakfast, surrounded by people having intelligent, philosophical conversations, people catching up, couples enjoying breakfast on a Thursday morning. And there I was, sitting all alone in a booth obviously made for two, enjoying a bagel and a book, and not even caring I was alone. I can't remember being this content in a long time.
I've realized that even though I may not have this huge network of friends so I constantly have companionship, the small, intimate network of friends I have are some of the most amazing people in the world. I'd rather sit all alone with a really good book in a restaurant than sit with someone else having superficial conversation any day. It makes life less stressful when you have people who only better everything about you and them.
Walking back home I just felt this sense of calm and relief. Like something that had been bothering me for a long time was suddenly gone. And if feels so good. I'm not sure what it is, or where it went, but I suddenly feel so at ease. I was never stressed or depressed or angry, but for some reason I just feel different. Who knows what happened in my sleep or what they put in the great coffee I had this morning, but something has changed, and I like it.