I hate everything and trust no one
My uncle's birthday was on the 12th. I called him that day to see if he wanted to get together this weekend so I could give him his Christmas and birthday presents.
I wish I hadn't.
I picked him up and we drove to the movie theater. He said that we needed to wait for my other uncle, who was gonna join us. We waited, and waited, and...waited. I decided that I had to go to the bathroom AND I didn't want to miss the movie, so I told my uncle I'd meet him in the theater. I waited for him, and then he appeared. He decided that my other uncle wasn't coming, and decided to actually go into the movie theater.
About a quarter of the way into the movie, my uncle started waving his hand. I saw a figure come up the steps, and figured it was the other uncle.
Suddenly, I hear a voice. It was a voice that made me go cold.
"What took you so long to get here?," my uncle demanded.
"What?," asked the figure.
My mother. Yep. My fucking mother.
My uncle decided to not only invite the other uncle without telling me (I didn't have a problem with that), but he also decided to invite my whore of a mother and bitch of a grandmother. Without asking me. Without even MENTIONING it. He totally lied to me. I said, "Is said uncle coming with his girls?" and my uncle said, "No, I don't think so. He didn't mention them." "Well how is he going to get here?," I asked. "Um...either he'll come with the girls in their car, or he'll borrow grandma's car."
I should have figured it out. But I didn't. I was too naive. I was too trusting.
How fucking DARE him? He LIED to me, just like they would. He jerked me around, and put me in a compromising position, just as those two bitches would.
I almost started crying on the spot. I sat through the rest of the movie feeling as if though someone had punched me in the stomach.
Why can't anyone realize that I don't want to talk to my mom and grandma? And now I don't even want to see my uncle. I no longer trust him. It just goes to show that I can't trust anyone. The only person I can trust is Matt - at least he listens to me when I say that I don't want to see certain members of my family (quickly becoming ALL members of my family). At least he respects my wishes.
My uncle even said, "I'm sorry for springing this on you." I remained silent. If I even remotely opened my mouth to reply, I would have bitched him out on the spot. He KNEW the whole fucking time. He plotted this scheme. I can't even begin to describe how I feel.
No one respects me. Being sneaky and setting up these reunions is NOT going to work. I am an adult, yet everyone treats me like a child who hates her best friend for a week, and then talks to her again as if nothing happened.
My mother acts as if nothing has happened. Here is a short list of what she has done to me over time:
- She committed identity theft against me, racking up a total of $2800 in charges
- Opened a Figi's account in my name that is not paid off (about $100)
- Stole $500 from me when I was 15, after I had worked my ass off
at the State Fair. She claimed that I "needed to start helping out
around the house and pay bills." I was FIFTEEN.
- Continually left me home alone from the time I was eight-years-old. Whenever I cried when she was leaving, she'd tell me, "You'll be fine. Grow up."
- When I was around the age of five or six, she'd leave me in the
car in a church parking lot while she went inside and played Bingo for
two hours. I had to keep quiet so no one would realize that I was in a
car alone.
- When I came back from Las Vegas, on my first flight alone (age
10), she was over a half-hour late picking me up. Why? She was spending
the weekend with her "boyfriend," a married man with whom she was
having an affair.
- She would bring strange men into the house and expect me to like
them right off the bat. All they wanted was a piece of ass - even I
could see that.
- Once, after basketball practice, I got into the car crying. I
said that I had had a bad practice because everyone was better than me
at basketball. Instead of comforting me, she told me, "Well then, maybe
you shouldn't play. You get too emotional over this - you may as well
quit."
I feel as if I've died inside. How could he do this to me? WHY DOES EVERYONE FUCKING CATER TO THEM? WHY DOES EVERYONE CONTINUE TO ENABLE THEM? WHY AM I THE BAD GUY?
Why was I even born?
PS-Mother, I blame you. You are the reason dad left. He left before I was even born - even though you tell me differently.
PPS-FUCK YOU AND FUCK MY ENTIRE FAMILY. I HATE YOU ALL.