why do i always suck?

[bama_bow]

ok so i am in 3v for the regatta on sunday. i thought that i beat hella people on the erg test. i guess that tha harder i try the worse im gonna do. i just dont get it anymore. i have such bad confidence in myself. i hate it. i dont kno what to do with myself anymore. i thought i was doin so well at crew but i guess im not. next time im gonna be in that fucking jv boat. thats y i have an erg and wil be erging so much and getting better.

so much for no school. i have nothing to do and nowhere to go except for crew. its raining and i hate it when it rains. we have a team dinner toinght at mayas but i dont want to go if its raining. cause then ill look like crap