human: 1, dog: 0, others humans: also 0
After WEEKS of trying and failing to get someone help me cut my dog's nails, I finally decided to forget them all and just go for it. Not that I haven't already tried to before now. I just never got anywhere on previous attempts. Not even one toenail trimmed. But today I was super duper determined, like "it's me or you, bitch!" type of determination. I was prepared to shed blood, sweat and tears to reach my goal. Shed some blood -- just a little cut on my foot that I didn't even notice when it happened, and it doesn't hurt at all. Shed a bit of sweat -- hot day man. Didn't shed any tears. My new clippers are awesome. Sliced through Kage's nails like butter. And these are some damn thick nails, big fat nails to go with his big fat paws. I was sneaky, underhanded, forceful, threatening, cajoling, bribing, trapping, AND innovative. Never have a dog's nails been trimmed in quite such a manner before now.
Gaaahhhbarfenugan! My mom left a stack of peanut butter cookies lying beside me for some reason. Really, REALLY good peanut butter cookies. But I already had one, and they're super big, so I can't have any more. Curse that woman!
Yesterday my brother was telling me how he just bought a fifty-pack of blank c.d.s off a friend and if we both burned all our ripped movies, plus his Futurama collection, we'd have an awesome video library. Then I got to thinking how I hadn't downloaded any new movies lately, so I decided to try for the Wedding Crashers. And then the brother says, "yeah, and you should get Starsky and Hutch too, just for the hell of it." And I was all "okey dokey, cap'n" like some mindless minion. Later I started to think about how I unquestioningly followed his bidding, and when did my little poophead brother start calling the shots. Just because I pick up the dog's poop doesn't mean I'm going to be the resident lackey. And yeah, I'm downloading Starsky & Hutch right now.
Dammit! I just ate another cookie.
Gaaahhhbarfenugan! My mom left a stack of peanut butter cookies lying beside me for some reason. Really, REALLY good peanut butter cookies. But I already had one, and they're super big, so I can't have any more. Curse that woman!
Yesterday my brother was telling me how he just bought a fifty-pack of blank c.d.s off a friend and if we both burned all our ripped movies, plus his Futurama collection, we'd have an awesome video library. Then I got to thinking how I hadn't downloaded any new movies lately, so I decided to try for the Wedding Crashers. And then the brother says, "yeah, and you should get Starsky and Hutch too, just for the hell of it." And I was all "okey dokey, cap'n" like some mindless minion. Later I started to think about how I unquestioningly followed his bidding, and when did my little poophead brother start calling the shots. Just because I pick up the dog's poop doesn't mean I'm going to be the resident lackey. And yeah, I'm downloading Starsky & Hutch right now.
Dammit! I just ate another cookie.