(no subject)
So, yeah. It finally happened. Last few times that we went to see her, she was on oxygen and she wasn't able to talk, and was pretty much falling asleep with difficulty breathing (well, hence the oxygen mask). But you know what? She's been that way, and worse, before. And she wasn't even coughing as much as she had been a previous time. It's been over a year, almost a year and a half- people who break their hip aren't supposed to last more than six months.
Then again, my grandma was 99, and extremely active before she broke her hip, so I guess that shows what sort of person she was. And now to honor her, some stories! I don't remember most of these, so they're going to be eh on details, and pretty short.
My grandma could never swallow a pill, for some reason. And one day, we were all in the car, and my mom started smelling a funny odor. My dad kept insisting that it was garlic, and he asked everyone if they had eaten garlic. Eventually, he asked my grandma, and she said 'I took a garlic pill, but it's odor-free.' And he says 'Yeah, but not if you chew it!'
She also had a high tolerance for heat in her hands. And when my mom and aunt were younger, she remembers that grandma took a potato right out of the oven, held it out, no tinfoil, towel, or anything, and started offering it up, asking who wanted.
Before we were kosher, we ate out in a Turkish restaurant, and on a plate, there was this green little pepper. My grandma thought it was a small bell pepper, I guess, and she just sort of chomped into it before we could warn her against it. She let out a howl and started chugging water. It was hysterical.
Another time, when we were visiting my dad in the hospital (rather, his office) grandma had decided to wait outside in the hallway, and when we came out, around the corner we see an arm raising up, and going down for a few minutes. And we go over, and it's my grandma, and she's just- doing this weird sort of 'tai bo' exercises out of nowhere! And from then on we've always associated her with these types of bottle openers. Looks like a little exercising person!
So yeah, my mom told me this morning when she woke me. My initial thought was shock, then I started crying, and then I- well, I didn't feel relieved, but I thought it. Sounds kind of 'what?' but nearly a year and a half of wondering, seeing her suffering, seeing her fading, thinking 'is this the last time I'm going to see her?', and being preoccupied with thinking about her is very stressful and it was emotionally hard on all of us. Plus, she's not suffering anymore, which is another thing that was weighing in on us. The last two times, she was sort of wincing like she was in pain while breathing.
Aside from the morning, I only had a tiny two-second cry. It's still sort of not sinking in yet? I mean, I'm used to thinking 'is this going to be it?' and then seeing her again. Tomorrow's the funeral and burial, and if I know myself, it'll hit then, and I'll be able to mourn properly and not just feel blank and wander-y. Even though I hate crying in public, but it's not like it's not expected of most of the people there, anyway. Then there's sitting shiva, which is basically sitting on a lowered seat to show mourning for a close relative, for seven days. I'm not obligated, but I'm still going to be there; there is here, in the house. People who want to give their condolences come over the house to visit with the mourner, and people are supposed to send food. Even though we've done both for other people, I just get this feeling that we're not going to get too many visitors. I dunno. Hopefully there'll at least be a minyan (ten men) to do mourner's kaddish. I think that after shiva I'll probably be okay. I've been mourning, intentionally or unintentionally, because there were some days that she just didn't seem alive.
Bette Levine died at 5:30 this morning, at 99 years old. Hebrew name Bayla Gittel bat Feyga Rivkah.
Then again, my grandma was 99, and extremely active before she broke her hip, so I guess that shows what sort of person she was. And now to honor her, some stories! I don't remember most of these, so they're going to be eh on details, and pretty short.
My grandma could never swallow a pill, for some reason. And one day, we were all in the car, and my mom started smelling a funny odor. My dad kept insisting that it was garlic, and he asked everyone if they had eaten garlic. Eventually, he asked my grandma, and she said 'I took a garlic pill, but it's odor-free.' And he says 'Yeah, but not if you chew it!'
She also had a high tolerance for heat in her hands. And when my mom and aunt were younger, she remembers that grandma took a potato right out of the oven, held it out, no tinfoil, towel, or anything, and started offering it up, asking who wanted.
Before we were kosher, we ate out in a Turkish restaurant, and on a plate, there was this green little pepper. My grandma thought it was a small bell pepper, I guess, and she just sort of chomped into it before we could warn her against it. She let out a howl and started chugging water. It was hysterical.
Another time, when we were visiting my dad in the hospital (rather, his office) grandma had decided to wait outside in the hallway, and when we came out, around the corner we see an arm raising up, and going down for a few minutes. And we go over, and it's my grandma, and she's just- doing this weird sort of 'tai bo' exercises out of nowhere! And from then on we've always associated her with these types of bottle openers. Looks like a little exercising person!
So yeah, my mom told me this morning when she woke me. My initial thought was shock, then I started crying, and then I- well, I didn't feel relieved, but I thought it. Sounds kind of 'what?' but nearly a year and a half of wondering, seeing her suffering, seeing her fading, thinking 'is this the last time I'm going to see her?', and being preoccupied with thinking about her is very stressful and it was emotionally hard on all of us. Plus, she's not suffering anymore, which is another thing that was weighing in on us. The last two times, she was sort of wincing like she was in pain while breathing.
Aside from the morning, I only had a tiny two-second cry. It's still sort of not sinking in yet? I mean, I'm used to thinking 'is this going to be it?' and then seeing her again. Tomorrow's the funeral and burial, and if I know myself, it'll hit then, and I'll be able to mourn properly and not just feel blank and wander-y. Even though I hate crying in public, but it's not like it's not expected of most of the people there, anyway. Then there's sitting shiva, which is basically sitting on a lowered seat to show mourning for a close relative, for seven days. I'm not obligated, but I'm still going to be there; there is here, in the house. People who want to give their condolences come over the house to visit with the mourner, and people are supposed to send food. Even though we've done both for other people, I just get this feeling that we're not going to get too many visitors. I dunno. Hopefully there'll at least be a minyan (ten men) to do mourner's kaddish. I think that after shiva I'll probably be okay. I've been mourning, intentionally or unintentionally, because there were some days that she just didn't seem alive.
Bette Levine died at 5:30 this morning, at 99 years old. Hebrew name Bayla Gittel bat Feyga Rivkah.