Let us mourn the loss of another summer.
First and foremost, here's the plan. I get four hours sleep. I stay awake until 3 o'clock when I have to go to work. I stay awake at work until 9 o'clock when I get off. I come home, I pass out. Drastic times call for drastic measures and with my sleep schedule, if you can call randomly crashing hard throughout the day a sleep schedule, the way it is drastic is the only option left. So far so good. Though I didn't call Stacy as I should have, but to be fair I told the girl I don't like calling people after midnight.
So now onto the Summer Summary (wait...okay...). Basically this summer has been awful, as most are for me. This is my least favorite time of year honestly. With summer comes heat, humidity, and unending periods of sunlight. It's also a time of year where love birds flit here and there, promptly pooping on my head in the process. Indeed, there has not been a summer in memory that did not include an Andrew Myers heartbreak and this one was no different.
Kaiden, I miss you. I miss you a lot. More than I think I'm capable of acknowledging. I still feel completely destroyed by it. I knew you better than I know most people in my life now. I loved you more than I thought I could at this stage of my laugh. And I never met you. And I never fully trusted you either. I know you suspected this, even though you never made mention of it. Bearing with my paranoia and constant bithery were two of the numerous things about me that I can't believe you tolerated as you did. I don't know how long it will be until my heart thaws and I will be able to feel for another person again, but I know when it does I could not possibly care for them with all of me as there will always be a place for you.
That said, and really that's all there is to say but I'd rather expand and ellaborate on the other happenings of the season despite their complete unimportance in light of Kaiden's death, quite a bit did happen over the last four months. I'm going back to school. Still in journalism, still not liking it too much, but I figure a second degree will come a lot quicker after the first one anyway...it's gonna be a long academic career for me. I lost a job, which was really a blessing as I am now being paid better at a new store and am enjoying the experience a lot more. Kroger makes work less like work and though I still cannot stand to be off my ass doing things and expending effort on something not World of Warcraft related I find myself not bitching about it nearly as much as I did about Winn Dixie/EW James.
My relationship with God has been on a rocky course over these months. I thought I was in good with the whole 'waiting til marriage' decision. They Kaiden's accident happened. I say this for everyone to see because everyone needs to understand that God cannot prevent things like this from happening. In truth, I don't think He would if he could. We were given free will and with free will comes random fucked up things that happen for no reason. Were God to interfere with these things, He would be interfering with Free Will which would almost certainly screw with the ver cosmos that His rules govern. God can't break his own rules and unfortunately that means that sometimes we lose people that we care for. In my case, it's happened twice in roughly the same fashion. It's messed up my head, bad. I can't sleep, I'm on edge, I'm stressed, I have no desire to do much of anything except die some days. Still I deal. God's love helps me deal, it's all He can really do to help I suppose.
I went to Las Vegas. Drove to Las Vegas. Word of advice. Never drive to Las Vegas. Fly. If you can't fly, don't go, or if you absolutely have to, ditch the car and fly back when you have to. I say this because you have to go through New Mexico to get to Las Vegas. New Mexico sucks. Why we felt it had to be part of the United States I do not know. But we should give it back. Really, we wouldn't lose much. I think a gas station or two and thousands of acres of irradiated desert. Damn, what a loss... But Vegas was fun. The World Series of Poker was truly a unique event. I loved the convention and it was cool getting to go to a private party. Vegas still has a pair of my socks though. And for that, they will all die. I'm not sure who 'they' are at this point, but be on notice, 'they' are totally fucked.
I also moved back home and was promptly gouged by my old apartment complex. Ashton Parc, you're being warned as well. I don't like paying 300 dollars when I shouldn't have to. It makes me unhappy, and when I become unhappy Tomahawk Cruise missiles begin to randomly target your house. I'm not saying I'm going to blow up you, your family, and the entire 20 block radius in your immediate vicinity, but things like this do happen. After all, I think the terror alert is in the orange now.
The Cubs still suck, but this is a fact that I have become accustomed to. I remain confident however that before I die, alone, presumeably surrounded by soda cans and an aura of complete misery, I will see the Chicago Cubs win the World Series. It's going to happen, quit snickering you bastards.
I'm writing more, and it isn't all sad for once. Some of it is funny. I'll post my "Creepy Myspace Guy" and "Drunk Is No Excuse to Fuck Your Boss' Daughter" songs at some point in the very near future. Maybe I'll even record something along with them. It may be tough though, I was kinda starting to learn guitar when somebody decided that Tab websites are copyright infringement. Add the mainstream record companies to that Cruise Missile Target list. And Paris Hilton, The Duffs, and Lars Ulrich for good measure. And make sure Lindsey Lohan is slapped until she regains her senses. Oh Lindsey...what have you become. And Zach Braff needs to die too...him and his perfect life...grrrr Mandy Moore was MINE!
I finished The Dark Tower series. A couple other books as well. Boy I didn't see that coming. I actually sat down and read this summer. Yea, surprised me too. I think I forgot that I could read...
Okay, insane and slightly disturbing celebrity grudges aside, I don't believe there's much else to say. Basically, it's been a summer. People haven't changed a bit, indeed I've realized more than ever that they never will, and I guess that's not so bad once you come to terms with it. After all, if they're fucking up, it's their life not yours.
And with that thought I leave you oh gentle and diligent (for if you sat through this entire post diligence is surely an understatement) reader. God bless you, yours, and that dusty trail that you are set to pave. Mourn not the summer, it will be back in another 8-9 months.
So now onto the Summer Summary (wait...okay...). Basically this summer has been awful, as most are for me. This is my least favorite time of year honestly. With summer comes heat, humidity, and unending periods of sunlight. It's also a time of year where love birds flit here and there, promptly pooping on my head in the process. Indeed, there has not been a summer in memory that did not include an Andrew Myers heartbreak and this one was no different.
Kaiden, I miss you. I miss you a lot. More than I think I'm capable of acknowledging. I still feel completely destroyed by it. I knew you better than I know most people in my life now. I loved you more than I thought I could at this stage of my laugh. And I never met you. And I never fully trusted you either. I know you suspected this, even though you never made mention of it. Bearing with my paranoia and constant bithery were two of the numerous things about me that I can't believe you tolerated as you did. I don't know how long it will be until my heart thaws and I will be able to feel for another person again, but I know when it does I could not possibly care for them with all of me as there will always be a place for you.
That said, and really that's all there is to say but I'd rather expand and ellaborate on the other happenings of the season despite their complete unimportance in light of Kaiden's death, quite a bit did happen over the last four months. I'm going back to school. Still in journalism, still not liking it too much, but I figure a second degree will come a lot quicker after the first one anyway...it's gonna be a long academic career for me. I lost a job, which was really a blessing as I am now being paid better at a new store and am enjoying the experience a lot more. Kroger makes work less like work and though I still cannot stand to be off my ass doing things and expending effort on something not World of Warcraft related I find myself not bitching about it nearly as much as I did about Winn Dixie/EW James.
My relationship with God has been on a rocky course over these months. I thought I was in good with the whole 'waiting til marriage' decision. They Kaiden's accident happened. I say this for everyone to see because everyone needs to understand that God cannot prevent things like this from happening. In truth, I don't think He would if he could. We were given free will and with free will comes random fucked up things that happen for no reason. Were God to interfere with these things, He would be interfering with Free Will which would almost certainly screw with the ver cosmos that His rules govern. God can't break his own rules and unfortunately that means that sometimes we lose people that we care for. In my case, it's happened twice in roughly the same fashion. It's messed up my head, bad. I can't sleep, I'm on edge, I'm stressed, I have no desire to do much of anything except die some days. Still I deal. God's love helps me deal, it's all He can really do to help I suppose.
I went to Las Vegas. Drove to Las Vegas. Word of advice. Never drive to Las Vegas. Fly. If you can't fly, don't go, or if you absolutely have to, ditch the car and fly back when you have to. I say this because you have to go through New Mexico to get to Las Vegas. New Mexico sucks. Why we felt it had to be part of the United States I do not know. But we should give it back. Really, we wouldn't lose much. I think a gas station or two and thousands of acres of irradiated desert. Damn, what a loss... But Vegas was fun. The World Series of Poker was truly a unique event. I loved the convention and it was cool getting to go to a private party. Vegas still has a pair of my socks though. And for that, they will all die. I'm not sure who 'they' are at this point, but be on notice, 'they' are totally fucked.
I also moved back home and was promptly gouged by my old apartment complex. Ashton Parc, you're being warned as well. I don't like paying 300 dollars when I shouldn't have to. It makes me unhappy, and when I become unhappy Tomahawk Cruise missiles begin to randomly target your house. I'm not saying I'm going to blow up you, your family, and the entire 20 block radius in your immediate vicinity, but things like this do happen. After all, I think the terror alert is in the orange now.
The Cubs still suck, but this is a fact that I have become accustomed to. I remain confident however that before I die, alone, presumeably surrounded by soda cans and an aura of complete misery, I will see the Chicago Cubs win the World Series. It's going to happen, quit snickering you bastards.
I'm writing more, and it isn't all sad for once. Some of it is funny. I'll post my "Creepy Myspace Guy" and "Drunk Is No Excuse to Fuck Your Boss' Daughter" songs at some point in the very near future. Maybe I'll even record something along with them. It may be tough though, I was kinda starting to learn guitar when somebody decided that Tab websites are copyright infringement. Add the mainstream record companies to that Cruise Missile Target list. And Paris Hilton, The Duffs, and Lars Ulrich for good measure. And make sure Lindsey Lohan is slapped until she regains her senses. Oh Lindsey...what have you become. And Zach Braff needs to die too...him and his perfect life...grrrr Mandy Moore was MINE!
I finished The Dark Tower series. A couple other books as well. Boy I didn't see that coming. I actually sat down and read this summer. Yea, surprised me too. I think I forgot that I could read...
Okay, insane and slightly disturbing celebrity grudges aside, I don't believe there's much else to say. Basically, it's been a summer. People haven't changed a bit, indeed I've realized more than ever that they never will, and I guess that's not so bad once you come to terms with it. After all, if they're fucking up, it's their life not yours.
And with that thought I leave you oh gentle and diligent (for if you sat through this entire post diligence is surely an understatement) reader. God bless you, yours, and that dusty trail that you are set to pave. Mourn not the summer, it will be back in another 8-9 months.