(no subject)
Its weird that the more little real-life successes I have are really just causing me to become more frustrated with school. Lets face it, classes are dumb. They do SO little to prepare you for reality. Thats why school is safe, but its also why it sucks. So, here I am totally procrastinating becuase I have no idea what I'm supposed to teach these shit-head middle schoolers tomorrow. And I don't care. Becuase I will never teach middle schoolers- I'd rather wait tables. But, its a hoop I have to jump through to get what I want, so I'll do it for tomorrow.
In the midst of being really unmotivated about school things, I'm really having fun with what I'm doing. I complain a lot about driving to dallas all the time, but I LOVE that there are all these oppurtunities outside of denton.
~I've been asked to sing one more concert with Orpheus. WAHOO!!!!!! This completes their season, which mean, even though I was technically never a contracted member of the group that I sang with them for this entire season. Something to put on a resume, if nothing else, but also TOTALLY fun!!!
~Dallas Bach Society asked me to do another concert with them too- they are much more laid back so this may not be as exciting of news. But it pays! And the concert is soon:
April 9th: Bach's Easter Oratorio Church on the Incarnation, Dallas, TX. 8pm
~I'll be in Boston this summer for sure with Collegium. But, instead of taking a group, he's only asked 5 or 6 people. So, I was asked and he's giving me a 10 minute solo that is accompanied by virtuoso violin. IN BOSTON! Thats where I wanna be! I'm probably gonna pee in my pants, but I'll get drugs or something to keep me calm while I'm there.
~Meeting lots of fun people. No dating though. It makes me sad kinda, but not like it used to. I know I'm capable of a relationship, but I still get sad that there doesn't seem to be anyone that I can just be ALL of myself around. Granted, that would require large amounts of understanding, patience and good humor. But it could also be my fault for NOT being all of myself all the time. I hope i'm not going back to people pleasing mode. I don't think I am. There are plenty of people not pleased with me.
New living situation: Cody's fallen off the face of the earth and is missed, but the awkwardness that was developing isn't. New roomate is very very cool. Happy that I can go over to Jodi and Catherine's now without facing the drama that hovered over their house while they had a fourth roomate. They are consistent friends, and I'm so thankful for that. Complain all you want about how emotional they are, at least it doesn't lead to actual INSTABILITY. They are very constant, and I love having friends like that. Even if I don't see them for a week(s).
I guess I should face the fact that no matter how long I sit here and brood about my life right now its not going to change the fact that in 6 hours I'll be teaching a lesson I know nothing about to 7th grade girls. So, its time for sleep.
In the midst of being really unmotivated about school things, I'm really having fun with what I'm doing. I complain a lot about driving to dallas all the time, but I LOVE that there are all these oppurtunities outside of denton.
~I've been asked to sing one more concert with Orpheus. WAHOO!!!!!! This completes their season, which mean, even though I was technically never a contracted member of the group that I sang with them for this entire season. Something to put on a resume, if nothing else, but also TOTALLY fun!!!
~Dallas Bach Society asked me to do another concert with them too- they are much more laid back so this may not be as exciting of news. But it pays! And the concert is soon:
April 9th: Bach's Easter Oratorio Church on the Incarnation, Dallas, TX. 8pm
~I'll be in Boston this summer for sure with Collegium. But, instead of taking a group, he's only asked 5 or 6 people. So, I was asked and he's giving me a 10 minute solo that is accompanied by virtuoso violin. IN BOSTON! Thats where I wanna be! I'm probably gonna pee in my pants, but I'll get drugs or something to keep me calm while I'm there.
~Meeting lots of fun people. No dating though. It makes me sad kinda, but not like it used to. I know I'm capable of a relationship, but I still get sad that there doesn't seem to be anyone that I can just be ALL of myself around. Granted, that would require large amounts of understanding, patience and good humor. But it could also be my fault for NOT being all of myself all the time. I hope i'm not going back to people pleasing mode. I don't think I am. There are plenty of people not pleased with me.
New living situation: Cody's fallen off the face of the earth and is missed, but the awkwardness that was developing isn't. New roomate is very very cool. Happy that I can go over to Jodi and Catherine's now without facing the drama that hovered over their house while they had a fourth roomate. They are consistent friends, and I'm so thankful for that. Complain all you want about how emotional they are, at least it doesn't lead to actual INSTABILITY. They are very constant, and I love having friends like that. Even if I don't see them for a week(s).
I guess I should face the fact that no matter how long I sit here and brood about my life right now its not going to change the fact that in 6 hours I'll be teaching a lesson I know nothing about to 7th grade girls. So, its time for sleep.