[Fic] Sick Cycle Carousel
Title: Sick Cycle Carousel
Rating: lol PG-13, I guess..
Pairing: Akame
Summary: Jin never though Kazuya'd react that way..
AN: It's song fic. Don't expect much anyway... Also, first time writing a fanfic in English and I know my verbs aren't correct but.. ><
Beta by: Nobody
It was morning. The gentle sunshine touched lightly his pale skin. He hasn't slept for two nights. Everything happened so fast. He just couldn't get it.
If shame had a face I think it would kind of look like mine
If it had a home would it be my eyes
He understood what he was doing, he just couldn't stop it. Maybe he was being himself? Was the real he, the real Jin Akanishi, that bad?
No, he's done it before. But this time it was different. He didn't know what exactly. He just felt it. He felt ashamed of his actions, of his feelings, of himself.
Would you believe me if I said I'm tired of this?
He was bad at showing his feelings, he knew it. And whatever he was trying to show, it just happened right the opposite.
He was in his apartment, his room, lying on his bed. The sun shined brightly and gently touched his pale skin. One of his hands covered his eyes. His head hurted as hell.
He tried to remember what exactly happened last night. Though he remembered the words Kazuya told him clear like crystal `I hate you`. He couldn't remember what he did this time. Yes, he had sex with him. That was a normal thing when for them - at least when they were drunk. But the thing was, they've never got along after Jin went to America to study. Everyone knew that. But that was definitely not the reason, he knew it. Johnny sent him there so he could cool his feeling toward Kazuya a little.
And it worked. When he came back he didn't know how the others would react. It was completely different from what he remembered.
Everybody was doing his job. Junno wasn't telling his lame jokes anymore. Maru and Ueda were sitting in their chairs and doing some paperwork, Koki was always pissed from something and Kame... Kame didn't even notice him the first time he entered the dressing room. But he changed too. It wasn't the same. KAT-TUN wasn't the same anymore.
Well here we go now one more time
I tried to chase you down
I tried to see how low I can get down to the ground
I tried to earn my way
Though he ignored Kazuya, the boy just pissed him with his presence. He liked picking fights with him for the smallest thing. He always treated him like dirt. Tried to control him.
And somehow the love became hate. When they were going out for a drink they always ended at somebody’s apartment, either His or Kazuya's. It just didn't matter. It was just sex, pleasure and lust. In the morning everything was as before.
It goes on and on
Over and over and over again
Keep spinning around I know that it won't stop
The months passed by, the years. They somehow got addicted to each other. Jin couldn't imagine his life without Kazuya. Was that love again? No, it couldn't be. He hated him. Kazuya hated him, that's what he guessed, so what was this feeling? When he thought like that, he let it pass by. In the day he was too busy to irritate Kame, the night was too busy fucking him like mad. And so it went on and on like that untill the night. This night changed everything.
I never thought I'd end up here
Never thought I'd be standing where I am
Two nights ago. KAT-TUN were in a bar, drinking. Kazuya and Jin knew where this will end. But something about Kazuya was not right. When he and Jin got out of the bar and the older boy didn't waste even a second, attacking Kazuya's lips it just.. didn't feel the same. Sure, it was a good kiss, but Kame wasn't into it. Jin pulled back and watched him annoyed with blurred gaze. The other one just stared at his feet. It was irritating to Akanishi to just stay in one place and doing nothing.
He pulled Kame's wrist and got him in his car. Their next stop was at his apartment, his bed. He didn't remember exactly what he've done to him. He just remembered Kazuya didn't want it. And the words. Those words that hurted him so much.
`I hate you.`
He remembered Kame saying this with teary eyes. But he continued. He was drunk after all!
And there he was, in his bed, feeling stupid. Actually it wasn't his stupid actions that worried him that much. He was.. inlove with Kazuya again. That made him understand, that there's thin line between love and hate and you never know when you're gonna get on the other side.
Now he couldn't face his friend. No, he didn't deserve calling him like that.
Keep spinning around I know that it won't stop
Till I step down from this for good..
Rating: lol PG-13, I guess..
Pairing: Akame
Summary: Jin never though Kazuya'd react that way..
AN: It's song fic. Don't expect much anyway... Also, first time writing a fanfic in English and I know my verbs aren't correct but.. ><
Beta by: Nobody
It was morning. The gentle sunshine touched lightly his pale skin. He hasn't slept for two nights. Everything happened so fast. He just couldn't get it.
If shame had a face I think it would kind of look like mine
If it had a home would it be my eyes
He understood what he was doing, he just couldn't stop it. Maybe he was being himself? Was the real he, the real Jin Akanishi, that bad?
No, he's done it before. But this time it was different. He didn't know what exactly. He just felt it. He felt ashamed of his actions, of his feelings, of himself.
Would you believe me if I said I'm tired of this?
He was bad at showing his feelings, he knew it. And whatever he was trying to show, it just happened right the opposite.
He was in his apartment, his room, lying on his bed. The sun shined brightly and gently touched his pale skin. One of his hands covered his eyes. His head hurted as hell.
He tried to remember what exactly happened last night. Though he remembered the words Kazuya told him clear like crystal `I hate you`. He couldn't remember what he did this time. Yes, he had sex with him. That was a normal thing when for them - at least when they were drunk. But the thing was, they've never got along after Jin went to America to study. Everyone knew that. But that was definitely not the reason, he knew it. Johnny sent him there so he could cool his feeling toward Kazuya a little.
And it worked. When he came back he didn't know how the others would react. It was completely different from what he remembered.
Everybody was doing his job. Junno wasn't telling his lame jokes anymore. Maru and Ueda were sitting in their chairs and doing some paperwork, Koki was always pissed from something and Kame... Kame didn't even notice him the first time he entered the dressing room. But he changed too. It wasn't the same. KAT-TUN wasn't the same anymore.
Well here we go now one more time
I tried to chase you down
I tried to see how low I can get down to the ground
I tried to earn my way
Though he ignored Kazuya, the boy just pissed him with his presence. He liked picking fights with him for the smallest thing. He always treated him like dirt. Tried to control him.
And somehow the love became hate. When they were going out for a drink they always ended at somebody’s apartment, either His or Kazuya's. It just didn't matter. It was just sex, pleasure and lust. In the morning everything was as before.
It goes on and on
Over and over and over again
Keep spinning around I know that it won't stop
The months passed by, the years. They somehow got addicted to each other. Jin couldn't imagine his life without Kazuya. Was that love again? No, it couldn't be. He hated him. Kazuya hated him, that's what he guessed, so what was this feeling? When he thought like that, he let it pass by. In the day he was too busy to irritate Kame, the night was too busy fucking him like mad. And so it went on and on like that untill the night. This night changed everything.
I never thought I'd end up here
Never thought I'd be standing where I am
Two nights ago. KAT-TUN were in a bar, drinking. Kazuya and Jin knew where this will end. But something about Kazuya was not right. When he and Jin got out of the bar and the older boy didn't waste even a second, attacking Kazuya's lips it just.. didn't feel the same. Sure, it was a good kiss, but Kame wasn't into it. Jin pulled back and watched him annoyed with blurred gaze. The other one just stared at his feet. It was irritating to Akanishi to just stay in one place and doing nothing.
He pulled Kame's wrist and got him in his car. Their next stop was at his apartment, his bed. He didn't remember exactly what he've done to him. He just remembered Kazuya didn't want it. And the words. Those words that hurted him so much.
`I hate you.`
He remembered Kame saying this with teary eyes. But he continued. He was drunk after all!
And there he was, in his bed, feeling stupid. Actually it wasn't his stupid actions that worried him that much. He was.. inlove with Kazuya again. That made him understand, that there's thin line between love and hate and you never know when you're gonna get on the other side.
Now he couldn't face his friend. No, he didn't deserve calling him like that.
Keep spinning around I know that it won't stop
Till I step down from this for good..