Heavy.
Stella's dad was over tonight to pick her up. He stayed for a while and we had really great conversation and then we played with Stella ... together. IT was strange. OH, I've been thinking so much lately about all of those times when we were still together.. playing and loving with our daughter. Like, after dinner every night.. we got so silly!! We would chase stella around the kitchen table and give her piggy back rides and roll around on the floor and bounce on the bed.. it was so lovely. That's the hardest part.. those memories.. and tonight, was... well, nice, but made that missing so much stronger. The conversation part of it was the best b/c ERic knows me better then anyone in the world and tonight we talked very honestly and openly, something we haven't done in a long time... and doing that tonight felt so good... like a long sigh... wow.