( oo2) ➠ silent my star.
Author: Amortentia
Rating: PG
Pairing(s): Baekhyun & OC
Genres: Romance, angst
Wordcount: 4046
Summary: “You came to me in silence, you left me in silence.”
SILENT MY STAR
“How long has it been?” Baekhyun, faces up, eyes are looking at the starry sky, softly whispering.
A few stars twinkles.
She raises two fingers for him two see, the answer is two months. Yeah, it has been two month since Baekhyun and she date. Two months are the most happiest time in Baekhyun’s life, because he has met her, the girl that he knows only belong to him. Baekhyun still remembers the first time they met, clearly like it only happened yesterday.
~~flashback~~
It was a summer day with full of sunshine and clouds on the blue sky, such a beautiful day. There was wind too, but it didn’t help the summer day go down a bit cooler, well you know, it’s summer. And summer is hot.
Baekhyun was running across the streets to get the to SM, today was his second day training there. Walking along the street, he couldn’t believe that he finally became a trainee at that big famous company of Korean music industry. Baekhyun had never wanted to be an artist before but now that thought changed. Artist, quite interesting to be. He was too focus on the trainee thing so he didn’t noticed that there was a girl coming to his way. Still, with the thought in mind and the hurry footsteps, Baekhyun bumped into the girl. Only when it happened, his thought disappeared to let him pay attention on her.
“Sorry sorry, I’m really sorry. Are you okay?” Baekhyun knelt down to raise her up.
“Are you okay?” He asked again with worried voice.
She didn’t answer. She just resorted the files and documents which was messed up after the crash and then looked at Baekhyun, gave him a reassuring smile.
Baekhyun took entire her smile and suddenly his heart, with a natural reaction when you meet someone you have feeling for, skipped a beat. Her smile was so beautiful and so peaceful, her lips just curved up making a perfect charm for everyone who stood in front of her. Just know Baekhyun started to look at her intently. She’s pretty, long dark-brown wavy hair embraces her oval face, the fair skin which was lighten up under the sun rays made her even look like the beauty from drawing. And her eyes, her eyes, why were they so mesmerizing with all the thought hidden inside, Baekhyun wondered what did she put in those thoughtful and sad steamy eyes? Her own world which only she could enter? Well it could be. Like the drop in the ocean, you’d never know what she think or where she look at.
Then, all the thought stopped when Baekhyun realized she was about to walk away. What? She didn’t even answer his question. All Baekhyun wanted to know is if she was fine after he bumped into her. Baekhyun sured with that speed he was walking, she must be a bit hurted.
“Hey! Wait!” Baekhyun ran after her, trying to catch her steps.
Finally, Baekhyun catched her at the cross line.
“Why didn’t you answer me?” Baekhyun gasped.
She didn’t say anything, like two times before.
“What’s wrong? You don’t like talking to strange people? Please, let me know, are you okay?” This time Baekhyun was really freaking out. What’s with this pretty girl? His questions were just what normal people do, so why didn't she answer.
The girl looked at Baekhyun with sad face, seem liked Baekhyun really hurted her. Then she took out a pen inside her bag and wrote on a paper that she carried along.
“I’m fine. And I can’t talk, that’s the reason why.”
She couldn’t talk? The explanation for all her reactions. Now Baekhyun understood why she didn’t say anything since then. His mother said God was fair with everyone, and this pretty girl wasn’t an exception. Despite of the great beauty, God took away her voice, the only thing she could use to communicate. But was it fair? The voice for the beauty? It wasn’t an equal exchange!
“Oh…”, he faltered, “I didn’t know… I’m sorry…”
“It’s not your fault.” She held up the paper again.
And then she bowed at Baekhyun as a goodbye, and walked away. This time, Baekhyun really let her go with out calling back. She had gone, leaving him with all the vague thoughts. She really couldn’t talk? He thought life must be really hard for her. Would he able to see her again?
“Why are you so late?” Suho opened the door with a hidden unhappy attitude.
“I’m sorry, I had a problem on the way here.” Baekhyun replied.
“Problem? What problem?” Kai stopped dancing in the corner, turned face to ask.
“Nothing. I just bumped into a girl.”
“Well I hope you didn’t bump into a shrew one.” Duh voice, Sehun’s only.
“Of course I didn’t! And please Sehun, mind your words when talking to elders.” Baekhyun answered. Aaah this kid, the youngest of EXO, glad you have known.
“How was she?” Chanyeol added.
“How is how?” Baekhyun replied. “She’s nice, didn’t say anything, even accepted my apologize.”
“Wow! Cool!” D.O., the only one who always seem didn’t know what happened, surprised.
“It’s not cool at all.” This last sentence about the girl of Baekhyun came out little sad.
After a tiring practice day at SM, six members came back to their dorm. It was late, about 10 p.m, they were all exhausted and hungry too. So D.O. decided to get in the kitchen, find something to cook the night meals for everyone. Baekhyun said he didn’t feel like eating anything and went into his room.
“Hahaha… You had fallen for that girl, hadn’t you?” Chanyeol and Suho made a joke.
And Baekhyun didn’t find it funny.
He silently closed the door and placed his back on the bed, eyes starred at the stars on the ceiling. Baekhyun liked stars since he was a little kid, so when he moved to the dorm, he spent a day to sticked all the glowing stars on the ceiling. The light didn’t turn on so it was dark, and the stars litted up. Now there was only Baekhyun in the room, no light, no sound, nothing in his mind but the girl, the girl today he met. He closed his eyes but in the dark, he still saw her. Her smile and her face, even her writing on the paper said that she couldn’t talk, everything that reminded him about her… Why did they come so deluging? And why were they so strong?
Maybe, this was just maybe, Chanyeol and Suho were right, he fell in love with her.
“Oh Baekhyun…. you has loved her already!” He said with himself.
But what did it mean “love” when he didn’t know if he could see her again? Baekhyun stood up and opened the window. There were a lot of stars this night.
“Dear stars… I sincerely wished I could see her aigan….”
Few days later.
“Hey hey you guys!” Chanyeol walked into the living room, spoke loudly, trying to get everyone’s attention.
“What?” All members replied.
“Earlier when I was on my way walking up here, I saw our landlady being with a girl. She was there with suitcases and belongings. Looks like we’re about to have a neighbor!”
Didn’t let the others have chance to speak, he continued.
“And this is the bonus, she is pretty, VERY pretty.” Chanyeol claimed.
“Really?” All the members went excited.
“Yes, it’s real. If not I’m a virus joker.” Chanyeol made sure.
But wait, Chanyeol, he is already a virus joker of EXO-K. So this confirmation, was it worth to believe? Haizz…
Unlike others, Baekhyun was more hesitated than excited, he had the feeling that the girl Chanyeol were talking about was…
His thought immediately be stopped by the knocks on the door. Sehun went to open it and Mrs. Kim appeared in front of them. Mrs. Kim is their landlady.
“Hi kids!”, she smiled, “Sorry for interrupted in this early morning, I just want you to say hi to your new neighbor.”
Chanyeol turned to all members and his mouth shown off a victorious smile.
Mrs. Kim stepped back, and a young girl appeared instead. EXO was taken focus by her. Chanyeol, that weirdos was right again, she’s beautiful.
Baekhyun, at the same time, couldn’t hide the happiness when he saw her appeared in front him. He stood up and went near her with the smile on his face.
“It’s you. We meet again.”
“Again?” All people in the room surprised, including Mrs. Kim, “You two met her before?”
“Yes, do you remember I said I bumped into a girl on the street few days ago? This is her.” Baekhyun explained.
Then he turned back to the girl, asked.
“Do you remember me?”
She smiled and nodded.
“She really doesn’t talk much hah?” Sehun whispered in Suho’s ears.
And how coincide! Sehun’s question had the answer right after.
“She is mute. So please help her in the best way you all can, okay?” Mrs. Kim said while looking at her.
From the beginning to end, she just stood there silently, the calm smile was on her face, making all could not look at her times after times. Although she couldn’t speak, but she had the special feature which can make people want to love her right from the first.
“Hi, nice to meet you” Suho, D.O., Chanyeol, Kai, Sehun greeted her in turn.
While Baekhyun didn’t say anything. He liked strayed somewhere in his own world.
After the girl arrived, EXO continued their training at SM everydays, and they spent all the times when they at home helping her. But the communication was still hard, because she couldn’t speak so they had no other way but talk to her through pieces of papers, at first it was more than hard, but then finally they got used to it. To them, she was a special and gentle girl. And to one person, specifically Baekhyun, the feelings for her grown up fastly day by day.
EXO started to wonder where did Baekhyun disappear after morning vocal class. When the lesson ended, he quickly grabbed his stuff and walked out of the door without saying anything. One Sunday night when they are all at the living room, Kai started the conversation.
“Where do you go after vocal classes at the mornings?”
“To do something”, Baekhyun answered shortly, “you don’t have to concern about that, all of you, really.”
“What’s happening to you these days hyung?” Sehun’s turn to ask. “You like at somewhere else.
“Hey Hunnie… what do you mean?” He chuckled. “If I’m not here, where am I?”
“Well I don’t know! Suho hyung, talk to him!” That duh voice again Sehun ah.
“What’s to talk about?” Baekhyun continued smiling.
“Baekhyunnie… is there something you wish to tell me?” By quite serious and worry voice, Suho asked.
“No, of course no, nothing!” Baekhyun refused.
“Fine, if there’s any problem, tell me right away, deal?”
“Yes, anything hyung.” Baekhyun agreed.
“Can I talk to you?” Baekhyun stopped her while she was watering flowers in Mrs. Kim’s garden.
She nodded, which meant “Yes.”
They came sit down on the stone bench. To break the silence, Baekhyun started.
“Mute people, they have their own way of communicate right?”
“…”
“Can you do that? The sign language?” Baekhyun continued.
She looked at him a few seconds, and then her hands made a move, which mean “Yes” in sign language - language for the mutes.
Then Baekhyun quickly made some gestures too. She was so surprised. They continued to talk to each other by hands movement.
“I learnt it.” Baekhyun replied after her surprised face.
“You learnt? Why?”
“Because I want to talk to you, I want to know you.”
“Why?” She asked again.
“You know what, the first time I met you, I didn’t know you were mute. But after I known it, my feelings grown bigger.”
“Feelings?”
“Yes, feelings… for you…”
Her eyes looked straight to Baekyun face, she didn’t do hands gestures anymore.
“You know…” Baekhyun started slowly, “After I came home that day, I made a wish upon the stars, I wished to see you again. And it came true, now you’re here with me. I’m really thankful.”
“…”
“You are really beautiful. I bet if you had a voice, your voice would be very beautiful too. But don’t worry, you have the eyes replaced that loss. You think no one would love a disable like you right? Anything can happens. And it’s happening to me, to us right now.”
“Stop… you…” Her hands raised in the air, “Thank you for have such feelings for me but… you can’t. You’re a good person, you should have the same good girl to love, not me.”
Baekhyun stopped. He looked at hear fondly, and for the first time there was sadness in his eyes.
“Don’t think that way. You need a good person to love and take care to you too.”
“You don’t understand, loving me only…”
“Only what?” Baekhyun crossed her line, “All I can see is us together, can you open your heart to me? You have been lonely for a long time, haven’t you? I’m here, and I love you. What’s wrong with that?”
“It’s just…” She confused.
“Just…?”
“I…”
She couldn’t finish what she was about to say. For a few seconds, time stopped flowing, the wind stopped blowing, a thing happened that made the whole word stopped awhile. Can you guess what was it?
When she was about to say the word “cannot”, Baekhyun leaned down to kiss on her cheek, softly and quick like a heavy wind glanced through surface of something.
“You know what you were going to say. This, means “can”. Now will you tell me…”
“Can I love you?”
That was a beautiful day, the sun shined though tree leaves and warmed up the smell of flowers in the garden. Baekhyun’s heart felt racing and her heart felt peaceful in the way that she couldn’t explain, the way that no-one could explain.
~~end flashback~~
“Today is our 2 months anniversary right?” Baekhyun heads up looking at her facing down his face, asks with childish voice.
She nods. Then Baekhyun turns back to his starry night sky.
“So many stars… Which one is us, do you know which one?”
“Why do you ask such question, how can I know?” She says by hand gestures.
“You don’t but I do, haha… Look at that big and bright one, that’t us!”
“Why can’t we a two different stars?”
“Because we are one, we can’t be separated apart, understand?”
She smiles gently and doesn’t say a thing. Baekhyun always likes this. Although he is a grown up boy but still has the childish side. Baekhyun is light, and light is Baekhyun. He tells her that, and she belives. It’s truth.
“Aahhhhh…. I feel so sleepy~” Baekhyun yawns and his eyes are really sleepy.
“You’re already have your head on my thighs, why don’t you take a nap?”
Right. His head has been leaned on her thighs for hours, that’s why he can see the stars easily and clearly. When they to the park at the evening, Baekhyun always lean on her thighs and watch the stars. Have I told you that he loves stars?
Baekhyun love stars so much. And he says she is the brightest and the most beautiful star, his star and his whole universe.
She pats on his chest slowly and softly, following the gentle beats of the wind in a middle autumn night, and it doesn’t take long time for Baekhyun to fall asleep.
After making sure that Baekhyun is in his finest dream, she stops patting. Heading up the watch the stars now has gone many, only a few left. The star Baekhyun pointed to her, their star is no longer on the sky too. She sighs, quite tired and thoughtful. Because…
“Why did you come so late yesterday? You know we had an important meeting with the producer to work on new concept for debut. It could only work if all members were there to discuss! But you came at the last 15 minutes, how do you explain that?!!”
“I… I had an urgent… I’m sorry…” Baekhyun’s voice sounded small.
“An urgent?! Then where was your phone?” The manager was getting more angry after each question.
“I…” Baekhyun paused.
“Enough, you can stop here. Baekhyun, right now I’m really disappointed, do you know that? Where have the hard working and enthusiastic Baekhyun that I know gone?”
Then the manager shutted the door behind his back.
She heard it all, the conversation. And this was not the first she heard such kind of this. Baekhyun wasn’t have an urgent, or an headache or the high fever like he brought out as the reasons of all those times. She known the truth. Baekhyun was with her all those days. So that’s why he was yelled, because of her. She turned his back and decided not to enter the training room, she got out of SM company, where she planned to bring lunch for him. She walked straight home and thought about what the manager said, and about what the members said.
“Hyun ah~ Being with her is good, but you shouldn’t spend all your time for her.” Suho said.
“It’s right hyung, I like her too but I love you, and worry about you. Do you mean to debut as an artist with us or not?” Sehun was getting serious in what he said.
“You guys don’t understand…” Baekhyun replied to all the looks from members.
“We do understand.” D.O claimed, “we’re all like her, we do. But you are like brother to us, you need to think more about this.”
“And Baekhyun.” Chanyeol added, “your mom called this morning and said that she quite didn’t like you being with her.”
“What? My mom called?” Baekhyun surprised.
“Yes, she wanted to meet you but you weren’t there at the moment. That’s what she said.”
“What did she mean by that?” Baekhyun still couldn’t get to the point. His mother never makes clear of what she says, he always has to figure it out himself.
“She meant…. your girlfriend… she is mute right? And when you debut, if this goes public, it’s not good for you.”
“Not good? Why is it not good? What does you even know about her?” Baekhyun’s voice got higher, and asked, almost like shouting.
“Hyung calm down.” Kai reassured.
“We thought about it, maybe your mom right.” Suho said.
“So you mean I have to break up with her? No way!”
“We don’t say that. We just want, no, we just think that you should stop contacting her for a time. Either she can’t always be with you right? She has her own life.” The leader continued.
“Yes! She does. And it’s hard! Don’t you understand? She needs me to take care of her…”
“No, maybe you don’t have to…” Sehun dropped those words with the smallest volume it can get from his mouth.
So everybody found out Baekhyun and her shouldn’t be together. And she thought that way too. Baekhyun is going to debut as an artist, which means he will be busy all the time, be closed with him now just makes it harder when they finally have to go their own ways. What’s now? What can she do now? For Baekhyun… He has already done many things for her, and now is her turn to pay back. By leaving him, yes, she will leave him as she decided. But how to say that to Baekhyun? The moment she says that, two hearts will break. Her and his. Why is their love so hard and hurtful like this? Thinking of break up…
[It’s me. Let’s meet at the park tonight.]
Baekhyun reads her message and smiles. He doesn’t know…
“Have you waited here long?”
She shakes her head.
“What are we gonna do today hah?”
“… Sit down, I have something to tell you.”
“What?” Baekhyun does what she said, he’s curious with his eyes blinking and the cute smile on his face.
“Can we.. we need to… break up..” It takes her all the brave she has to clear this out. Her hands move slowly at the end of the line.
“W-what… what did you… said??” Baekhyun, who cannot believe what he has just heard from her.
“We need to… break up.” This time the last two words are clearer. She has to make sure that Baekhyun can hear it.
Did Baekhyun hear it? Yes? No? Yes, he heard it. But doesn’t want to believe. The bright smile is losing the light.
“Why?” He asks, the voice is broken out, and his heart is broken in.
“It’s time for you and me to go our ways. I know you will be an artist soon, I don’t want myself to be your burden in the future. Beside, I’m not complete, that’s not good for you.”
“Burden? Do you know what burden is? You aren’t a burden, you are my lover. You are the one I love, don’t you know that?”
“It’s what you think about me, one side. But what I just said is what I think about myself to you. It hurts me so bad to think about it…” She said through the gestures.
“Then don’t think about it, just be together, me and you. Don’t say break up, I can’t stand that…” Baekhyun pleads.
“I’m sorry but…”
“We can’t be apart, it can’t happen. We are in one star, do you remember? The brightest star that always shines?”
“Star… it didn’t shine after you fell asleep that night.” Her voice goes small for Baekhyun to hear.
“Please… you don’t have to be like this. Since when you started to think like this, when did y… Wait, did my mom and others say to you? What did they say to you?” Likes found something new, Baekhyun can’t stop making questions why they have to break up.
“No. They have nothing in this, just me. Don’t blame on them, I myself want us to break up..” She says, tries to hide the trembling is running through her body.
“This just can’t…Is this real…”
“I’m sorry again, that we can’t be together… but I have no ch-…”
“Do you love me?” Baekhyun gazes down, hides his reddish eyes which are about to cry, asks her the question, which is, right now the most important thing to him.
She stops a bit. And then she smiles, the most beautiful smile that she has ever given out. Then she answered, surely and clearly by the gestures though the tears are already filled up her face and the her body is trembling with the cold of the wind, and the frostbite inside her heart.
“Yes, I do love you.”
Right after she claimed that, Baekhyun finally got it. They will break up, not because they don’t love each other, it because they don’t get in the right situation. That’s all. She loves him, and he loves her. What’s on earth even matter? Baekhyun suddenly kisses her, slowly and gently. Deep and full of passion. The kiss, at that time, inside Baekhyun’s head and her mind, could last forever.
Now she is sleeping with her head on her shoulder. Her eyes still wet because of the tears. Wait until she slumbered, Baekhyun starts looking at the the night sky.
“So many stars….” He said.
“You know what… the star that I shown you, it isn’t my most favorite star. It’s beautiful but so far away, I can’t never own that. So I chose you, as my favorite star, my most beloved one. But now you are leaving me too, silently… you will appear on the night sky, bright and dazzling… like you have always been. But don’t worry, I will be able to find you in million stars, you are the brightest right? It won’t be hard…It won’t…”
What Baekhyun doesn't now is, his dry shirts are now wet at the shoulder.
THE END