해낼게 믿어준 대로 하나뿐인 걸 (I’ll get through it, just like you believed I would)
Prompt#: 015
Title: 해낼게 믿어준 대로 하나뿐인 걸 (I’ll get through it, just like you believed I would)
Word Count: 7,900
Side Pairing(s): Kai/Kyungsoo, past!Chanyeol/Sehun
Rating: PG-15
Warning(s):[click to open]minor (like really minor) description of blood
Disclaimer: The celebrities' names/images are merely borrowed and do not represent who the celebrities are in real life. No offense is intended towards them, their families or friends. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this fictional work. No copyright infringement is intended.
Summary: they bond over midnight snacks, late-night shifts, and just… everything in between.
Author's Note: Finally! This one was really hard to write because I suffered from serious writer block. Thank you at N for being there when I asked to brainstorm ideas in the middle of the night. I might not executed the prompt perfectly, but I hope you enjoy this prompter-nim! And also to all the readers of BAE2017, i hope you like this! Love from me!
(link to AO3)
It’s midnight and Chanyeol sleepily gets out from the operation room. His schedule is so packed today, from the second he clocked in this morning at 10 (well, official work hours be damned because he always makes sure his surgeries are all scheduled at or after 10 a.m), up until midnight. Chanyeol is just done with another appendix removal surgery, and now tiredly walking to the nearest snack vending machine right around the corner.
There is another person in front of the vending machine already, all dressed up with white coat and Chanyeol can guess it’s stetoschope around his neck so the person is a doctor. But, Chanyeol can’t see who it is because the other has his back facing Chanyeol. Chanyeol patiently gets in line, closing his eyes for a quick power napping as he waits for the other doctor to finish.
“Aish! Why can’t this machine work?!”
Chanyeol pops one of his eyes open, ah the machine is at it again. The other guy talks grumpily to himself about how annoying the vending machine is once again and Chanyeol initiatively walks forward to give the machine a few hard taps. Seconds after, the sound of a bag of chips falls into the receiver slot follows.
The brown haired guy cheers as he crouches down to grab the bag of chips from the slot before standing up again. He looks up and Chanyeol is met with a set of unfamiliar eyes, “Thank you so much for helping me... “ The other guy stops for a while as his eyes runs around Chanyeol’s body to search for his nametag. “Thank you so much for helping me, doctor Park.”
“You’re welcome.” Chanyeol casually replies, “Long shift?”
“Yeah,” The other guy replies quickly, “What’s new?”
Chanyeon only chuckles quietly, because really, what’s new? The guy moves aside to make way for Chanyeol. He glances at the name tag on the other’s coat, Doctor Byun. Chanyeol tries to remember the name, he’s been in the hospital for a long time and how come he doesn’t know about anyone with the name Doctor Byun? In the end, his brain is too tired to even think anymore so he decides to just ask around tomorrow.
He has a better thing to think about right now. Which is… choosing between potato chips or cheetos. He likes to argue that potato chips looks a bit healthier than cheetos, but then he likes cheetos the most. And this vending machine even has that rare crunchy cheese flavour of cheetos (how the hospital can even get their hands at that?), which is Chanyeol’s favorite. But he just ate hamburgers for lunch today, and it counts for junk food. Will he eat junk food twice in a day?
His bubble of thoughts pops when someone pokes him on the shoulder, he looks aside to see it’s the doctor Byun. The other looks at him with eyes wide, questioning, “Are you… okay? You look dazed just now I thought you were asleep…?”
“What do you think, potato chips or cheetos?”
“Huh?”
“I was thinking just before, should I get potato chips or cheetos for dinner?”
Doctor Byun is silent for a while, fingers resting at his chin as if thinking hard. His brows even burrow in such high level concentration like he’s being asked about which one he likes better: mom or dad?
“I think I’m going with cheetos. They have the rare flavour here.”
Chanyeol smiles brightly at the answer, finally getting the enlightenment he’s been waiting for. His finger goes to press at the button, and not long after the satisfying sound of a bag of cheetos falling into the slot. He crouches down to grab the bag out, before facing Doctor Byun again. “I think we chose well, doctor Byun. Thank you.”
“Cheetos always wins, doc.” The man is about to say another words when his pager rings to life. He quickly grabs it, his expression changes once he reads what’s written. “I think I’ve got to go. Thank you for your help, doctor Park.”
Before Chanyeol can even reply with anything, the doctor already flies away and goes out of sight once he takes a turn at the corner. Chanyeol is a bit disappointed because he doesn’t have the chance to maybe ask for doctor Byun’s name and his department, but whatever written in the pager must be important anyway. Better get to what I wanted to do at the first place.
Chanyeol looks down at the bag of Cheetos in his hold.
Ah, ya. Dinner.
---
“Good work today, Doctor Park.” The assistant nurse in front of Chanyeol tells him as he finishes patching up one of the patient’s leg. Chanyeol replies with a tired smile, the over eight hour operation is clearly draining his energy. How he can’t wait to crash at his bed back at home. Damn, will he even make it to his apartment? If anything, he will just crash at the on-call rooms until his next shift begins again.
“Doctor Kim, do you think you can finish this patient up for me?” Chanyeol asks Jongin, who is also in the operation room with him as a general surgeon. They are friends since the medical school, but decided to go separate ways after graduating as general practitioner. Fate is funny and maybe they are meant to be best friends for life so they meet each other again at the same hospital, both already surgeons, but in different divisions.
“Hmmmm,” Jongin makes a gesture of thinking about Chanyeol’s request, which the latter only scoffs at his friend’s act. “Dinner, my treat. Just finish this up and let me sleep until tonight, and then we’ll go eat at your chosen place.” Chanyeol bribes, knowing for well Jongin’s biggest weakness after his husband, which is food.
“I can eat anything that I want?”
“Whatever. I’ll buy you the restaurant to if you ask but let me sleep.”
Jongin immediately bows down at Chanyeol and grabs the needle holder from the sterile tray, “I’m going to finish this up, Doctor-nim. Please enjoy your rest.” The rest of the nurse staffs laugh at Jongin’s (mocking) very formal tone. If they’re outside right now Chanyeol will throw anything in his hand at the other, but Jongin should thank the Heavens that they are still in the operation theater and Chanyeol can’t really handle anymore injured person.
Without waiting for the other to finish, Chanyeol excuses himself out of the operation room. He gets out of his bloody apron and boots, not forgetting to take off his gloves and also googles. Trauma patients are always not easy to handle, not exactly the hardest but definitely hard. Chanyeol massages his scalp, expecting the impending headache because of the non-stop twelve hour shift. He doesn’t know why but the number of limbs he has to take care of tonight is pretty high, so he is exceptionally tired this morning.
The sun is out already, it shines brightly when he steps out of the operation room and Chanyeol is ready to crash into the nearest flat surface. His family and his friends (who is not in the same field of work as him) will say that it’s not healthy but his biological clock is fucked up already ever since he signed up for medical school so it doesn’t really bother him anymore. The family of the patient he just operated stand up when they see him stepping out of the room, he immediately puts on his professional smile.
“Your family is now being prepared to be brought out from the operation room. He nearly lost his limb, but thankfully he was brought to the emergency room fast so we can save his leg.” Chanyeol sees how the patient’s family let out a relieved sigh and it’s like a big burden has been lifted from their shoulder, and it warms his heart. As cliche as it sounds, moments like these are one of the reasons Chanyeol stays at the field he’s working at right now. “He’ll still need to have rehabilitation therapy, but we will let him recover first. So I’ll talk about it later.” He adds and the patient’s family thank him once again. “I’ll get going first, I hope for a fast recovery for your family.”
After excusing himself, Chanyeol makes his way to the on-call rooms. He meets Jongin’s Kyungsoo there, taking out his doctor coat from his locker. He only greets the other with a tired smile which Kyungsoo replies him with an understanding nod. Once he reaches for the bed, he throws himself on top of it and in seconds, he is out like a light.
That night finds Chanyeol at a restaurant near the hospital he frequently visits. So frequent until the lady --Mrs. Lee-- who owns the place practically calls Chanyeol her son. He’s out of his green scrub right now, instead supporting the black skinny jeans and oversized hoodie from his favorite brand. Everybody who passes by him right now wouldn’t believe that he is one of the top surgeon in the hospital nearby and will probably think he is just a university student.
“Ay, bro!” Jongin’s voice is heard before the said figure appears in front of Chanyeol, wide grin on his face because he knows he can eat as much as he can without paying tonight. Seeing Jongin coming, Mrs. Lee walks to their table bringing some glasses filled with water. She always likes it when the two of them come to visit her restaurant, reminding her of her two sons who are now away working at another city.
“Hello, you two. It’s been a while seeing the two of you here together.” says Mrs. Lee.
Chanyeol shrugs his shoulder, pointing at Jongin. “This person in front of me happens to be always busy with his husband. While me, the sad lonely--”
“That’s why I told you to go find yourself a girlfriend, Chanyeol.” Jongin says, before adding, “Or boyfriend. Whatever floats your boat.”
Mrs. Lee only laughs at the two’s banter and reaches a hand to caress Chanyeol’s hair. He leans into her touch like a kid to his mother. “Nah, Jongin is right Chanyeol. You’re not getting any younger. Do you want to grow old alone at the OR, huh?” Hearing that Mrs. Lee doesn’t side with him, Chanyeol pouts.
“Stop pouting, Chanyeol! It’s gross!” Jongin throws a tissue ball right to Chanyeol’s face. The other looks at Jongin with a shocked expression, before turning to Mrs. Lee. “Mrs. Lee! Look at what Jongin did to me!”
“Aish, you two. Now stop fighting and say, what do you guys want to eat tonight?”
“I’m……” Chanyeol looks at the menu for a while, “I think I’ll go with kimchi stew for tonight. What about you Jongin?”
“I want the doenjang stew, and also a portion of kimchi pancakes.” Jongin flips the menu in his hand once again, “And also a bowl of cold spicy noodles and a portion of dumplings. I think that’s all.” Jongin smiles at Mrs. Lee as he gives the menu back, while Chanyeol only looks at him with disbelief. This guy really meant it when he said he wanted to eat as much as he can.
“What are you? A bear? Can you even finish all those foods?”
“You said I can eat as much as you can. I’m starving, and Kyungsoo won’t be home until 11 because he still has two cataract surgeries to do.” Jongin puts his phone away, shrugging. Ah, yes. Jongin is Kyungsoo’s husband. While Jongin is a surgeon, Kyungsoo is an ophthalmologist. Kyungsoo’s work burden is less than Jongin, but sometimes he still has some operations to do too. Chanyeol, until this day still amazes at how both of them handle their relationship with their busy schedules. Sometimes Chanyeol finds them sleeping together (as in really sleeping) at the on-call rooms, both too tired to even go home. The hospital is definitely their second home.
Chanyeol himself, is afraid of having a relationship. Not everyone is understanding. And even if they understand, the next question is until when? He has experienced it first hand himself and it’s not something he wants to go through again.
“What are you thinking about?” Jongin puts a halt to Chanyeol’s train of thoughts. Chanyeol shakes his head, trying to shoo away the unnecessary things inside his head. He is not interested on searching the special someone or dating for now. Mrs. Lee comes to their table to put on foods enough to feed the whole country (Okay, Chanyeol that’s too much), they thank Mrs. Lee together. “By the way, have you heard the news?”
Chanyeol looks up from blowing air to his still hot stew, “What news?”
“There’s a new surgeon coming around last week? A transfer from the Bucheon branch of the hospital. Fresh graduate.” Jongin answers, stirring his stew slowly. “And then..? Transfer to and from hospital are not something rare, Jongin… It happens all the time.”
Jongin smiles, “Aren’t you curious? I heard he’s the same age as you, and I heard from the nurses that he’s cute.”
Chanyeol groans, “No, not again Jongin.”
“Oh come on!” Jongin claims, “Maybe this one will make you move on from Sehun!”
“Sehun is soooo last year, I’ve already--”
“--moved on and living my life blah blah. Okay, I trust you. But don’t you think it’s time to open your heart for someone new? It’s not wrong though.”
“It’s not…” Chanyeol thinks for a second, “but I’m not rushing it. I’m taking it slowly. And now, I heard you and Kyungsoo are planning to adopt soon?”
At the topic of adoption, Jongin’s eyes light up in pure excitement. “Yes!” He answers happily, and continuing to tell Chanyeol about all the process and all the kids he’s met at the orphanage so far. Phew, plan successful.
---
Chanyeol meets doctor Byun again about one week later, at the rooftop of the hospital. The place is usually empty, so it’s a bit of surprise to see the other this time. The rooftop has been Chanyeol’s secret hiding place, the place he’ll go when he feels too stressed out about the cases he has to deal day by day. The place gives him a chance to be at peace in the middle of the bustling hospital.
The other is seated at one of the benches, looking surprised all the same when his eyes meet Chanyeol from afar.
“Hey, we meet again.” Chanyeol greets as he sits next to doctor Byun. The other acknowledges him with a slight nod and a smile, “Didn’t expect to see you here, Mr. Cheetos.”
Chanyeol chuckles at the nickname, “The same thing goes for me too.” They are silent after that, letting each other busy with their own thoughts as they both stare at the blue sky. The wind blows and Chanyeol closes his eyes to rest them, silently thankful for his companion who shares the same sentiment to make the moment quiet and peaceful.
After a while, Chanyeol finally breaks the silence. “Is it just me getting old forgetting about people or I definitely never saw you around here before, are you new?”
The other nods, eyes still closed. “I just transferred here from the Bucheon branch about two weeks ago.” Baekhyun offers his hand out, “I’m Byun Baekhyun.”
And suddenly Chanyeol remembers his conversation with Jongin few days back at the restaurant. “Ah, that one. I heard about you from Jongin. I’m Park Chanyeol, by the way.”Chanyeol sees as Baekhyun's eyes widen after he hears Chanyeol introduces himself, like he's realizing something. "You're the supervisor surgeon Doctor Kim said?" Baekhyun quickly stand up and bows in sorry, "Oh my God, i'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, sunbae for being unpoli--"
"Hsssssh," Chanyeol stops Baekhyun who is still bowing. "It's okay Baekhyun, I don't mind. I don't even know what do you think you did wrong." Baekhyun stops bowing but he's still not saying anything.
"And, don't call me sunbae, please." Chanyeol adds after a quick thought, "The only thing I am a senior to you is me being in this hospital for longer than you. Other than that, we're equal. We're both doctors already, aren't we?"
Baekhyun timidly nods, before braving himself to look up to Chanyeol. "Thank you, Doctor Park."
"Nah! One more thing, just call me Chanyeol. You saying doctor Park will only remind me of my dad. Which nothing is wrong with that but it makes me feel old. Jongin told me we're in the same age, and it's been a while that I have a same aged friends around here."
"Al-alright, Chanyeol."
Chanyeol smiles, he hopes Baekhyun will be fun to work with. They may have a lot of things to do together in the long run. Now it is Chanyeol's turn to offer his hand, "I hope a good team-work from you Doctor Byun. Welcome to the hospital."
---
The chance to work together comes a bit faster than Chanyeol thinks. There is an emergency operation one Saturday evening. Being single and no family waiting at home for some weekend family time, Chanyeol responds to the call followed by gratitude from the more senior ones for letting them off the hook this time. He also asks the nurses to call for any surgeon available to scrub in.
The other surgeon is not there yet when Chanyeol is done changing into the scrub suit, he plans to wait but then it is an emergency so he decides to start the operation first. The surgeon joins him in the middle of him analyzing the patient’s abdomen, the other is panting so hard like he just ran a mile. It’s Baekhyun. Chanyeol smiles at him as a greeting, but of course Baekhyun doesn’t see it because Chanyeol wears a mask.
“I’m so-- sorry, I’m la--”
“It’s okay, Baekhyun.” Chanyeol cuts in before Baekhyun suffocates himself by trying to talk. “Now, calm down your breath. Do you have any idea what’s possibly this patient has? Has the nurse briefed you on the way here?”
Baekhyun walks closer to the bedside to look closer. His mind’s reeling to work as he takes in the general appearance of the patient (which doesn’t really help much in his opinion, because the patient’s sedated), and taking in the information stated by one of the nurse about the patient’s acute condition just before going into operation.
After a while, Baekhyun looks up at Chanyeol with a confident smile. “I assume the patient got acute appendicitis. And what you’re doing right now is oblique muscle-splitting incision, with approach from the taeniae.”
“Ding-dong-daeng.” Chanyeol sing-songs playfully, his hands still skillfully moving to free the patient’s tissue. “Is there any other approach we could use other than this? Any other method?”
“You can go for a transverse incision or a conservative midline incision. Or, you can use another method which is by using the laparoscopy.”
Chanyeol straightens his body once Baekhyun is done answering, his hands stop mid-air. “I am sure you already know the way for this procedure, so I’m going to give this task to you. Please, doctor Byun. Take my place.”
“Eh?” Baekhyun’s eyes widen in surprise. Just like every time Chanyeol whispers some hospital secrets to him from time to time, Chanyeol finds it.. endearing. “Any problem, doctor Byun?”
“No-no, it’s clearly not a problem. But, I’m a new surgeon here. Are you sure you’ll allow me to do this procedure doctor Park?”
“They said you are one of the best new surgeon in Bucheon. So.. let’s see whether it’s true or false?” Chanyeol provokes jokingly, and he is sure successful once he sees the spirit in Baekhyun’s eyes alights. Chanyeol steps backwards to give Baekhyun his previous space, before moving around the bed to be on the other side. “I’ll be right here watching you, doctor Byun. Don’t worry, I’ll intervene as soon as something goes wrong.”
Baekhyun only nods as an answer before holding out his one hand, “Scalpel, please.”
Twenty minutes into the surgery and there’s no other voice other than Baekhyun’s, whether asking for change in surgery instrument or for some help in suctioning blood. Chanyeol glances at Baekhyun for the umpteenth time that day, taking in the sight of Baekhyun’s concentrating face. The Byun Baekhyun in front of him is so far with his playful image he’s always shown outside the operation room. Truth to be told, even though Chanyeol was the one who told Baekhyun to be comfortable with him but sometimes he doesn’t expect Baekhyun’s friendliness and because he isn’t used to that, it makes him uncomfortable at first. But soon he learns that it’s only how Baekhyun is.
Chanyeol doesn’t know how long he stares at the other until he is brought back to the real word by hand waving right in front of his face, startling him. Chanyeol blinks his eyes, “Are you done?” Baekhyun doesn’t answer directly, but only pointing down for Chanyeol to look at the stitched wound on the patient’s right side abdomen. “Done, and clear. I’m already signed him for some antibiotics to prevent any infections.”
“Dammit, you’re really as good as they said Baekhyun.” Chanyeol compliments as they make their way out of the operation room. They put out their bloodied scrub suit (and Chanyeol tries so hard not to peek at the smooth skin hiding under Baekhyun’s scrub. Jongin is right.. Chanyeol has been single for too long already, he can’t even keep his heart rate calm when he sees another guy changing in front of him) before changing into their clothes.
“I’m sorry to bother you on weekends, Baekhyun.” Chanyeol turns around to face the smaller (who’s already clothed, thank God). “It’s just I think it would be better to have some assistance.”
“Some assistance or you just want to test me, too?” Baekhyun strikes back jokingly, which earns a laugh from Chanyeol. “Well, maybe that’s too. But, really, I’m sorry.”
Baekhyun waves his hand dismissively, “It’s okay, Chanyeol. I’ve been wanting to put my hands into work since I’ve moved here. Clearly didn’t expect you to give me full control of the operation this soon, but nonetheless, thank you.”
“I know you would do great, that’s why.” Chanyeol takes a glance at his phone, it’s already 9 p.m. Time flies so fast when you’re in the operation room. “And by the way, it’s past dinner time and I’m sure you haven’t eaten. Wanna go grab dinner together?”
Baekhyun doesn’t have the time to say anything before his stomach answers it by it’s sound, which makes Baekhyun flushes in embarrassment. Chanyeol lets out a small laugh and slings his arm over Baekhyun’s shoulder, “So, what do you want for dinner? It’s on me, because you’ve done a good job today!”
“Chanyeol, you don’t have to. I’ll just grab some chips at the vending machine.”
“But I want to!” Chanyeol insists, before adding “And it’s not good to always eat junk food. Come one! You have to try this restaurant, it’s me and Jongin’s favorite.”
Baekhyun finally nods, “But I pay the next time we eat together.”
Chanyeol sends his gummy smile as an answer, “Accepted!”
---
After the dinner together that night, they rarely cross path again after that. Chanyeol is busy with the new case he is assigned to, and as for Baekhyun, he heard from the nurses that Baekhyun is busy too because he is said to work together with a professor from another hospital for a hard case. Chanyeol is passing the hallway near the geriatric ward when he spots someone familiar sitting on one of the empty bench looking at the park.
It’s Baekhyun.
Chanyeol decides to greet the other and maybe chat for a while, so he walks closer and plops himself down next to Baekhyun. The figure besides him remains still, which is a bit unusual seeing how loud and active Baekhyun is in daily life.
“Baekhyun?” Chanyeol finally decides to call when there’s a tear coming out from the corner of Baekhyun’s eyes, which quickly wiped away by the other once he realizes Chanyeol’s presence.
“Hey, Chanyeol.” Baekhyun smiles, and Chanyeol feels a bit uncomfortable with how forceful it is. He might now know Baekhyun for long, but he’s seen how the other interacts with the other doctors and staffs at the hospital from afar. Baekhyun is loud, and talkative. Two points that make him befriends other people easily. He’s always smiling. And seeing how he has to force himself to smile, there must be something horribly wrong.
“Hey, what happened?”
At Chanyeol’s question, Baekhyun breaks out in a fit of tears. His body shakes uncontrollably and his voice comes out really broken. Chanyeol doesn’t know where he gets the urge, all he knows is he has to calm Baekhyun down so he pulls Baekhyun into a hug.
He doesn’t know how long Baekhyun cries into his chest, but he lets him. Not minding the wetness seeping to his white coat. Chanyeol keeps stroking Baekhyun’s hair slowly, what he does every time he calms his niece down, and just wait until Baekhyun finishes.
After a while, Baekhyun has finally calmed down. The other pulls himself back from Chanyeol’s embrace, wiping his face with his palm on the process. Chanyeol doesn’t miss the pink tint on both of Baekhyun’s cheeks, and his heart somehow silently cheers at the possibility of him being the reason of it. What the nurse said is right, Baekhyun is indeed cute. Even with hair pointing at different directions, Chanyeol finds him cute nonetheless.
They are both silent for a while, with Baekhyun still trying to regulate his breathing and keeping down the sobs. Once again, Chanyeol waits for Baekhyun to start talking whenever he wants to.
“There is this patient assigned to me, a grandpa with a bit of a rare case.” Baekhyun starts, “Me and the other doctors already tried every treatment stated on the books, trying from one thing to another one. But it never works.
We always come back with bad news every time the grandpa has finished one of the therapy plan. I keep asking for forgiveness every time but the grandpa always says to me that there is nothing to be sorry for. In turn, he always thanks me and the other doctors for trying so hard to help him. He’s still smiling and being positive despite all of that.”
Baekhyun takes a deep breath before continuing, “This morning during our daily check-ups, we just knew from his daughter that his father hasn’t woken up at all since last night. Not even responding to voices, movement or even pain.”
“The grandpa fell into coma, and his survival chance decreases to no more than 10%.” Baekhyun sighs, “I feel like I’ve failed myself. Like every seconds I’ve spent learning from the medical school are all for nothing because I can’t do anything to help this grandpa.”
Baekhyun’s voice is getting thinner and thinner with each words so Chanyeol reaches out for his hand and wraps it with his palm, squeezing it lightly. Baekhyun stops talking, and Chanyeol can hears the small sobs coming out from the smaller once again. “I know how you felt… I’ve been through that a lot but there is this one case that left an impression to me.”
Without waiting for any response, Chanyeol continues. “This women suffered from a breast cancer years ago. She went through surgeries after surgeries, not to mention the chemotherapy but instead of decreasing, the cancer cells spread throughout her body. She was in massive massive pain. There is no pain medication written in the text book that can help her ease the pain. I can only stare with helplessness every time she screamed because the pain just got unbearable.”
“After months and months living in the hospital, at one Saturday morning, she finally passed away in her sleep surrounded by her beloved husband and children. You know what? They didn’t cry. At all. Not a single tear.” Baekhyun looks up at Chanyeol, face confused. “How?”
“I asked them, because it just looked so weird right? And your mind must have filled with negative thoughts about the family like you might think that the family planned her death or something.”
“I don’t,” Baekhyun defends himself, but seeing his reaction Chanyeol knows the thought must’ve crossed the other’s mind even for a while. Chanyeol chuckles.
“They said, they didn’t cry because they were happy for her.” Chanyeol says, looking straight into Baekhyun’s eyes. “She finally could rest peacefully, without any pain. At least, they said, her suffering finally came to an end. They already accepted it all, for them it was better to see her not hurting.”
“So, Baekhyun. There is only so much we can do as a doctor. And sometimes, we will feel helpless too. But don’t worry, because what’s important is we do the best to our ability every time. Then, any effort won’t go to waste.”
Baekhyun doesn’t say anything after that, too busy with his own thoughts. Chanyeol stays there, in case Baekhyun cries again or even needs a shoulder to lie on. He won’t leave until he makes sure Baekhyun feels better.
The sound of someone’s pager going off breaks out their bubble of silence, and it turns out to be Baekhyun. After seeing what’s on the screen, he turns at his side to Chanyeol, “The team called me for afternoon check up at the grandpa. I have to go now.”
Chanyeol nods and smiles, “All the best hopes for the case, doctor Byun.”
“Chanyeol-ah,”
“Hmm?”
“Thank you so much.” And with a small smile accompanied with a hesitant wave, Baekhyun turns around and disappears behind the corner.
---
There is a big accident near the hospital one day, and the ER is in need of extra doctors so Chanyeol is heading there once his current surgery is done.
And.. it’s true.
The ER is in a complete chaos once he’s there. Doctors and nurses are all over the place, trying to save every patients that wheeled in through the double door. Nurses with bottles of alcohol and povidone, doctors coming in and out from the makeshift rooms separated by curtains. And despite the room is already full, there are still patients wheeled into the room and need to be attended.
Chanyeol doesn’t know how much patients he has handled until now, his body working automatically examining and tending to the patient’s needs based on the information given by the paramedics. He is just done doing the stitches on one of the patient’s head, and he’s now heading to the front door to attend another patient waiting.
This time is a girl, her eyes are closed and there’s a nasty bleeding coming out of her nose. “The girl got stuck under a car for a while, there is open fracture at the femur and also suspected organ bleeding. She was found awake but slowly deteriorating. Her blood pressure keeps dropping.” Chanyeol scans the girl quickly and figures that he won’t be able to treat this girl alone. When he’s about to ask for help, a voice comes from his side. “We’ll take this girl now.”
It’s Baekhyun, and Chanyeol sees as the other quickly jumps into action. Pulling out his flashlight, the other checks the girl’s eyes. “GCS score 9, and her pupils are reacting normally. I’ll examine the extent of her head trauma, you can examine her leg.”
Chanyeol barks out instructions for the nurses around him to put on IV, and inject some drugs after the IV has been set up. He grabs a scissors from the table and cuts the girl’s jeans for him to look at the fracture clearly, and good God it is indeed a nasty fracture. “Prepare an OR for me, CITO” Chanyeol informs the nurse beside him, not forgetting to ask for more RL ready because the girl lost lots of blood and needs to be replaced quickly.
Baekhyun is now standing by the patient’s abdomen, pressing and searching for any indication of pain or bleeding. The other looks up at Chanyeol, “There’s nothing to be worried about the head trauma, it’s only a scratch at the scalp. But I need to do USG for the patient abdomen, I’m still not sure about the internal bleeding.”
“Can you do it in the OR? I need to bring her in.”
“It’s possible,” Baekhyun calls one of the nurses to prepare the USG machine inside the OR and pulls up the handrails on the sides of the bed. Chanyeol does the same and they wheel the girl down pass the corridor to the available OR room.
Thankfully the surgery goes by without any serious complications. Even in the middle Baekhyun needs to open up the girl’s abdomen because he confirmed internal bleeding through USG. Chanyeol finishes his procedure first, and gets into helping Baekhyun immediately. The source is quickly found, and they can stabilize the girl’s blood pressure before it drops to dangerous level.
“Got something on your mind, doc?” Baekhyun takes a glance at Chanyeol for a while, before asking for another forceps from the nurse. “You seem spaced out.” Baekhyun adds. Chanyeol doesn’t know how long he’s been silent until Baekhyun popped his bubble of thoughts. He is now waiting for Baekhyun to close the girl’s abdomen. Chanyeol focuses back his attention to Baekhyun now, who is handling the patient with utmost concentration across from him. He catches a small smile of satisfaction forming underneath the face mask on the smaller’s face once he’s done and it sends Chanyeol’s heart beating faster.
“Nothing, nothing.” Chanyeol shakes his head, trying to calm his heart.
Is it the adrenaline? Or sugar rush? Or.. something.
---
They head out fifteen minutes later, after dumping their gown at the dust bin and change into another set of fresh cloth. The girl’s parents are waiting for them outside the OR, quickly coming up to them as soon as they come out. The parents can’t stop thanking the two doctors, bowing profusely until Baekhyun asks them to stop. They talk for a while before bidding goodbye to Chanyeol and Baekhyun and go see their daughter at the ward.
“Where are you going, now?” Baekhyun asks when Chanyeol also excuses himself.
“I think I’m going to be at the doctor’s lounge. I have another surgery in two hours.”
“Do you want to go eat? My mom sent me lots of side dishes yesterday.” Baekhyun offers, eyes everywhere but looking at Chanyeol. Is he nervous? Chanyeol wonders inside his head. “Clearly too much for only one person. Count it as me paying you back for the dinner the other day? And for calming me down days ago? My apartment is not too far from here.”
Chanyeol finds himself agreeing at the offer. Having dinner before his another surgery indeed sounds good. Baekhyun’s place is also not that far, making it practical to just go back and forth. It’s definitely a break from the cafeteria’s food and the vending machine junk food he’s been eating for the past days.
“You can just sit at the living room first, I’ll heat up the food.” Baekhyun says before walking into the kitchen, leaving Chanyeol at the living room alone. Being a curious cat, instead of sitting, he walks around to look at the photographs spreaded around. Some in frames, some pasted at the bookshelves or the wall, some being hung on the thin string hanging from one side of the room to another. Chanyeol chuckles at some, Byun Baekhyun during childhood is cute.
“What are you laughing at?”
Chanyeol turns around to face Baekhyun who is now standing near him, hands on both sides of his waist looking at Chanyeol suspiciously. “Your ears are big during childhood, I thought I was the only baby with big ears in the world.”
“Your ears are still big, Chanyeol. In case you didn’t know.” Baekhyun scoffs, “And by the way, the food is now ready. Come on.”
They talk about each other during dinner. Chanyeol finds out that Baekhyun decided to be a doctor because of his grandma. The other’s grandma died when he was in junior high because of cancer, and that’s why he wants to study about the disease that claimed his grandma’s life. “What about you? Why do you want to be a doctor?”
Chanyeol lets himself chew his food first and swallow before starts talking, “Actually, I didn’t want to be a doctor at first. It was all because my parents asked me too. I could’ve denied the request, but my mother was sick at that time. So I didn’t have the heart to say no.”
“Was it hard? I mean, going through the medical school because you want is hard already. Moreover when you don’t want to do it at the first place?”
“It was hard, I admit.” Chanyeol nods, “And I resented it a lot at first. I didn’t study, I skipped class, I did everything bad possible. But then I got into clinic, and seeing the smiles from the patient’s family.. I think that’s the reason I’ve decided to stay. The feeling is really rewarding.”
“I feel you,” Baekhyun says, staring at Chanyeol’s eyes from across the table and smiles. “And you’re a great doctor now. Your parents must be so proud of you.”
---
After that night, it becomes a routine. A thing between the two of them. Chanyeol sometimes finds Baekhyun at the doctor’s lounge after his shift, and turned out the other is waiting for him to head for dinner together. Chanyeol even finds himself re-arranging his surgeries so he can finish right before or after Baekhyun’s, so they can head out for food together afterwards.
The other is funny, loud, talkative. A bit change from the seniors from the surgery department, who is always serious and proper every time. Even a change from Jongin who doesn’t really talkative when he doesn’t feel like it sometimes. They find out the same interest in music, spending time after dinner one night at the noraebang until morning which ended up with them getting late for the morning shift at the ER.
Chanyeol loves bowling, Baekhyun can’t throw any ball to save his life so Chanyeol came to the rescue one day and dragged the other to the bowling alley. In turn, Baekhyun took the taller to a PC room to play online games. Only to end up losing to Chanyeol’s team by the end of the night.
It feels so much like university days once again, and Chanyeol is enjoying it to bits.
Baekhyun makes he enjoys coming to work, always excited at the things they’ll do for the night. It doesn’t get tiring easily now.
They share encouragement in the form of smiles thrown at each other at surgeries, knowing stares at each other, or even simple gesture like pat on the back.
Sometimes at those nights where their schedule won’t meet and Chanyeol has to work overtime, Chanyeol finds bottled energy drink or coffee on top of the coffee table at the doctor’s lounge. There is a post-it with his name written on it, pasted on the front.
Chanyeol makes sure to leave some for the other too for nights that should be spent at the hospital because of surgeries or papers.
It’s really nice to have someone to share the burden of handling a hard case with someone with the same level of understanding. He can talk about his work, and also be given feedbacks. His previous partner rarely did that to him before, they would mostly changed the conversation to another topic because they didn’t understand what Chanyeol was talking about. Chanyeol is actually used to it already, but it’s a different kind of feeling now.
And it’s a nice one.
---
“I see you’re getting close to the new guy.” Jongin pipes as he sits at the chair across from Chanyeol, who has his head on the table with eyes closed. He just finishes his shift for the day, and it was an exhausting 12 hours shift. At Jongin’s words, Chanyeol opens his eyes. “New guy? You mean Baekhyun?”
“Hmm, hmm.” Jongin answers from behind his cup of coffee.
“He’s nice. And definitely more loyal than you because you dump me a lot for Kyungsoo.” Chanyeol huffs, “And else, what do you expect? For me to be unfriendly to him while we’ll surely have to work together in the future?”
Jongin raises both of his arms, as in surrendering. “Woah, woah. No need to get defensive, man. By the way you should go home and rest already. It looks like you’re going to sleep any moment.”
“I think I’m going to crash at Baekhyun’s tonight.”
Jongin whistles, a smirk is forming on his face already. “Woohoo! You guys are already that far? Sleeping at each other’s bed now?”
“YA! We’re not in a relationship like that, only as friends?”
“Like I would believe that. Friends certainly don’t look at each other like that.”
Chanyeol doesn’t answer this time, which is a bit odd because that guy always has answer to every Jongin’s tease. So Jongin pokes him a few times on the head. The closest he gets as answer is a soft snore, “Ya! Chanyeol! Don’t sleep here on the cafetaria. Ya! Ya!”
---
Today is the day of the big surgery for one of Baekhyun’s patient, the grandpa’s case he’s been working diligently for the last six months. The reason for Baekhyun’s breakdown before. The team finally found an approach to dissect the tumor residing inside the grandpa’s cranium. Chanyeol sees how much all nighter Baekhyun pulled the past few weeks, burying himself in papers and books to make sure everything goes well.
It is Saturday, and Chanyeol should’ve used it for sleeping the whole day like he used to. But he drops by the hospital as a moral support for Baekhyun. He doesn’t have to, but he wants to.
He spots the other in front of the OR room, walking back-to-back from left to right anxiously. There are other surgeons sitting at the long chairs near Baekhyun, seemingly nervous as well.
“Hey,” Chanyeol taps Baekhyun’s shoulder, surprising the other. Baekhyun turns around with wide eyes but he smiles as he spots it’s Chanyeol. “Hey.”
“Don’t be nervous.” Chanyeol ruffles Baekhyun’s hair. “You got this.”
It’s not long before Baekhyun is called by his team, they are going to go through the procedure once again before starting the real surgery. The patient is already at the OR, being prepared by the nurses and the anesthesiologist. Baekhyun turns around to face Chanyeol once again after signalling his team to go first and he’ll follow soon. Chanyeol clearly doesn’t expect the kiss and hug that followed.
It’s just a simple kiss. Or maybe it can’t even be called a kiss, but a peck. But it sends Chanyeol’s heart beating faster all the same.
Baekhyun hides his face at Chanyeol’s chest, and because of that he doesn’t see the blank look on Chanyeol’s face with both arms still in the air. Few seconds pass and Chanyeol finally finds it in him to hug Baekhyun back, resting his cheek on top of Baekhyun’s soft hair. He can’t help but smile.
They stay at that position for a few seconds more, before Chanyeol pulls back, still minding that they are in the middle of hospital’s hallway and Baekhyun still has a surgery to attend. The talk can wait until after the surgery. Baekhyun has his head down, clearly embarassed to the core. Chanyeol brings Baekhyun’s head up with his fingers, staring at the other straight in the eye.
“Remember that any effort…”
“...won’t go to waste.” Baekhyun cuts in the middle, bringing a smile to Chanyeol’s face because the other looks very much more confidence in himself. So different with the Baekhyun who had a breakdown at the hospital hallway months ago. Chanyeol pulls the other into a hug once again, and tightens it for a while before finally pulling back for real.
“Good luck doctor Byun.”
---
The surgery takes a lot of time, and Chanyeol wants to be there as soon as Baekhyun is out. So he decides to hang out by the doctor’s lounge, munching on snacks while watching the TV. Not in his three years working at the hospital he ever thinks he’ll be able to leisurely spending his time at the doctor’s lounge. He usually will be too tired when he enters the room late at night, all he remembers about the memory of this room are sleep, sleep, and sleep.
Two hours into the movie playing on the TV, Chanyeol fell asleep. He wakes up when someone barges into the room, and it turns out to be Wendy. Chanyeol remembers seeing Wendy at the group waiting in front of the OR just before, so he must be one of the surgeon for Baekhyun’s team. Wendy gives him a nod as acknowledgement when their eyes meet, before sluggishly walking to the mini bar to search for something to eat.
“How was the surgery? Did he make it?”
Wendy doesn’t answer immediately, she pulls out a box of milk from the fridge before facing Chanyeol. She shakes his head slowly, face somber. “He didn’t make it.”
---
Baekhyun went first after the surgery, he didn’t tell us where he’d go. That’s Wendy’s answer when Chanyeol asks her where’s Baekhyun. Chanyeol immediately runs out of the room to get to the OR, only to find the room empty with Baekhyun nowhere to be found. The other surgeons on Baekhyun’s team he meets at the hallways also don’t know where the petite surgeon went.
Chanyeol is about to give up searching throughout the hospital and wanting to get straight to Baekhyun’s apartment to see whether Baekhyun is there or not, when he realizes there is one place at the hospital he hasn’t checked.
Chanyeol’s hiding place.
The rooftop.
There is a familiar figure with it’s back on him when Chanyeol finally arrives at the rooftop. He knows with his heart that it’s Baekhyun. Chanyeol walks closer to him, ears aware for any hints of sobbing. But, there is none. Baekhyun is quietly sitting there, starring at the slowly reddening sky.
It’s almost time for the sunset.
Chanyeol quietly takes a place next to Baekhyun. The other doesn’t respond with words, but only moves closer to Chanyeol and lays his head there. They might have something waiting to be talked between each other. Chanyeol himself has thousand of questions in his mind.
But this, Chanyeol thinks, this is an answer enough.
For now.
“He didn’t make it….” Baekhyun says, eyes slowly closing.
“What do you feel about it?”
“I don’t know,” Baekhyun sighs, “but what I know for sure, that I’ve done my best. And because of that, my mind is finally in peace.”
The temperature is starting to lower, but Chanyeol doesn’t have the heart to ask Baekhyun to move inside. Chanyeol circles one of his arm around Baekhyun’s shoulder, pulling the other closer to his embrace so they can share the heat. The other looks so beaten up,but content, Chanyeol lets the static noise from the hustle bustle below to lull Baekhyun to sleep.
Just before he rests his eyes too, Chanyeol lands a kiss on top of Baekhyun’s head. “Sleep well, Baekhyun.”
They’ll have a long talk later.
---
Title: 해낼게 믿어준 대로 하나뿐인 걸 (I’ll get through it, just like you believed I would)
Word Count: 7,900
Side Pairing(s): Kai/Kyungsoo, past!Chanyeol/Sehun
Rating: PG-15
Warning(s):[click to open]minor (like really minor) description of blood
Disclaimer: The celebrities' names/images are merely borrowed and do not represent who the celebrities are in real life. No offense is intended towards them, their families or friends. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this fictional work. No copyright infringement is intended.
Summary: they bond over midnight snacks, late-night shifts, and just… everything in between.
Author's Note: Finally! This one was really hard to write because I suffered from serious writer block. Thank you at N for being there when I asked to brainstorm ideas in the middle of the night. I might not executed the prompt perfectly, but I hope you enjoy this prompter-nim! And also to all the readers of BAE2017, i hope you like this! Love from me!
(link to AO3)
It’s midnight and Chanyeol sleepily gets out from the operation room. His schedule is so packed today, from the second he clocked in this morning at 10 (well, official work hours be damned because he always makes sure his surgeries are all scheduled at or after 10 a.m), up until midnight. Chanyeol is just done with another appendix removal surgery, and now tiredly walking to the nearest snack vending machine right around the corner.
There is another person in front of the vending machine already, all dressed up with white coat and Chanyeol can guess it’s stetoschope around his neck so the person is a doctor. But, Chanyeol can’t see who it is because the other has his back facing Chanyeol. Chanyeol patiently gets in line, closing his eyes for a quick power napping as he waits for the other doctor to finish.
“Aish! Why can’t this machine work?!”
Chanyeol pops one of his eyes open, ah the machine is at it again. The other guy talks grumpily to himself about how annoying the vending machine is once again and Chanyeol initiatively walks forward to give the machine a few hard taps. Seconds after, the sound of a bag of chips falls into the receiver slot follows.
The brown haired guy cheers as he crouches down to grab the bag of chips from the slot before standing up again. He looks up and Chanyeol is met with a set of unfamiliar eyes, “Thank you so much for helping me... “ The other guy stops for a while as his eyes runs around Chanyeol’s body to search for his nametag. “Thank you so much for helping me, doctor Park.”
“You’re welcome.” Chanyeol casually replies, “Long shift?”
“Yeah,” The other guy replies quickly, “What’s new?”
Chanyeon only chuckles quietly, because really, what’s new? The guy moves aside to make way for Chanyeol. He glances at the name tag on the other’s coat, Doctor Byun. Chanyeol tries to remember the name, he’s been in the hospital for a long time and how come he doesn’t know about anyone with the name Doctor Byun? In the end, his brain is too tired to even think anymore so he decides to just ask around tomorrow.
He has a better thing to think about right now. Which is… choosing between potato chips or cheetos. He likes to argue that potato chips looks a bit healthier than cheetos, but then he likes cheetos the most. And this vending machine even has that rare crunchy cheese flavour of cheetos (how the hospital can even get their hands at that?), which is Chanyeol’s favorite. But he just ate hamburgers for lunch today, and it counts for junk food. Will he eat junk food twice in a day?
His bubble of thoughts pops when someone pokes him on the shoulder, he looks aside to see it’s the doctor Byun. The other looks at him with eyes wide, questioning, “Are you… okay? You look dazed just now I thought you were asleep…?”
“What do you think, potato chips or cheetos?”
“Huh?”
“I was thinking just before, should I get potato chips or cheetos for dinner?”
Doctor Byun is silent for a while, fingers resting at his chin as if thinking hard. His brows even burrow in such high level concentration like he’s being asked about which one he likes better: mom or dad?
“I think I’m going with cheetos. They have the rare flavour here.”
Chanyeol smiles brightly at the answer, finally getting the enlightenment he’s been waiting for. His finger goes to press at the button, and not long after the satisfying sound of a bag of cheetos falling into the slot. He crouches down to grab the bag out, before facing Doctor Byun again. “I think we chose well, doctor Byun. Thank you.”
“Cheetos always wins, doc.” The man is about to say another words when his pager rings to life. He quickly grabs it, his expression changes once he reads what’s written. “I think I’ve got to go. Thank you for your help, doctor Park.”
Before Chanyeol can even reply with anything, the doctor already flies away and goes out of sight once he takes a turn at the corner. Chanyeol is a bit disappointed because he doesn’t have the chance to maybe ask for doctor Byun’s name and his department, but whatever written in the pager must be important anyway. Better get to what I wanted to do at the first place.
Chanyeol looks down at the bag of Cheetos in his hold.
Ah, ya. Dinner.
---
“Good work today, Doctor Park.” The assistant nurse in front of Chanyeol tells him as he finishes patching up one of the patient’s leg. Chanyeol replies with a tired smile, the over eight hour operation is clearly draining his energy. How he can’t wait to crash at his bed back at home. Damn, will he even make it to his apartment? If anything, he will just crash at the on-call rooms until his next shift begins again.
“Doctor Kim, do you think you can finish this patient up for me?” Chanyeol asks Jongin, who is also in the operation room with him as a general surgeon. They are friends since the medical school, but decided to go separate ways after graduating as general practitioner. Fate is funny and maybe they are meant to be best friends for life so they meet each other again at the same hospital, both already surgeons, but in different divisions.
“Hmmmm,” Jongin makes a gesture of thinking about Chanyeol’s request, which the latter only scoffs at his friend’s act. “Dinner, my treat. Just finish this up and let me sleep until tonight, and then we’ll go eat at your chosen place.” Chanyeol bribes, knowing for well Jongin’s biggest weakness after his husband, which is food.
“I can eat anything that I want?”
“Whatever. I’ll buy you the restaurant to if you ask but let me sleep.”
Jongin immediately bows down at Chanyeol and grabs the needle holder from the sterile tray, “I’m going to finish this up, Doctor-nim. Please enjoy your rest.” The rest of the nurse staffs laugh at Jongin’s (mocking) very formal tone. If they’re outside right now Chanyeol will throw anything in his hand at the other, but Jongin should thank the Heavens that they are still in the operation theater and Chanyeol can’t really handle anymore injured person.
Without waiting for the other to finish, Chanyeol excuses himself out of the operation room. He gets out of his bloody apron and boots, not forgetting to take off his gloves and also googles. Trauma patients are always not easy to handle, not exactly the hardest but definitely hard. Chanyeol massages his scalp, expecting the impending headache because of the non-stop twelve hour shift. He doesn’t know why but the number of limbs he has to take care of tonight is pretty high, so he is exceptionally tired this morning.
The sun is out already, it shines brightly when he steps out of the operation room and Chanyeol is ready to crash into the nearest flat surface. His family and his friends (who is not in the same field of work as him) will say that it’s not healthy but his biological clock is fucked up already ever since he signed up for medical school so it doesn’t really bother him anymore. The family of the patient he just operated stand up when they see him stepping out of the room, he immediately puts on his professional smile.
“Your family is now being prepared to be brought out from the operation room. He nearly lost his limb, but thankfully he was brought to the emergency room fast so we can save his leg.” Chanyeol sees how the patient’s family let out a relieved sigh and it’s like a big burden has been lifted from their shoulder, and it warms his heart. As cliche as it sounds, moments like these are one of the reasons Chanyeol stays at the field he’s working at right now. “He’ll still need to have rehabilitation therapy, but we will let him recover first. So I’ll talk about it later.” He adds and the patient’s family thank him once again. “I’ll get going first, I hope for a fast recovery for your family.”
After excusing himself, Chanyeol makes his way to the on-call rooms. He meets Jongin’s Kyungsoo there, taking out his doctor coat from his locker. He only greets the other with a tired smile which Kyungsoo replies him with an understanding nod. Once he reaches for the bed, he throws himself on top of it and in seconds, he is out like a light.
That night finds Chanyeol at a restaurant near the hospital he frequently visits. So frequent until the lady --Mrs. Lee-- who owns the place practically calls Chanyeol her son. He’s out of his green scrub right now, instead supporting the black skinny jeans and oversized hoodie from his favorite brand. Everybody who passes by him right now wouldn’t believe that he is one of the top surgeon in the hospital nearby and will probably think he is just a university student.
“Ay, bro!” Jongin’s voice is heard before the said figure appears in front of Chanyeol, wide grin on his face because he knows he can eat as much as he can without paying tonight. Seeing Jongin coming, Mrs. Lee walks to their table bringing some glasses filled with water. She always likes it when the two of them come to visit her restaurant, reminding her of her two sons who are now away working at another city.
“Hello, you two. It’s been a while seeing the two of you here together.” says Mrs. Lee.
Chanyeol shrugs his shoulder, pointing at Jongin. “This person in front of me happens to be always busy with his husband. While me, the sad lonely--”
“That’s why I told you to go find yourself a girlfriend, Chanyeol.” Jongin says, before adding, “Or boyfriend. Whatever floats your boat.”
Mrs. Lee only laughs at the two’s banter and reaches a hand to caress Chanyeol’s hair. He leans into her touch like a kid to his mother. “Nah, Jongin is right Chanyeol. You’re not getting any younger. Do you want to grow old alone at the OR, huh?” Hearing that Mrs. Lee doesn’t side with him, Chanyeol pouts.
“Stop pouting, Chanyeol! It’s gross!” Jongin throws a tissue ball right to Chanyeol’s face. The other looks at Jongin with a shocked expression, before turning to Mrs. Lee. “Mrs. Lee! Look at what Jongin did to me!”
“Aish, you two. Now stop fighting and say, what do you guys want to eat tonight?”
“I’m……” Chanyeol looks at the menu for a while, “I think I’ll go with kimchi stew for tonight. What about you Jongin?”
“I want the doenjang stew, and also a portion of kimchi pancakes.” Jongin flips the menu in his hand once again, “And also a bowl of cold spicy noodles and a portion of dumplings. I think that’s all.” Jongin smiles at Mrs. Lee as he gives the menu back, while Chanyeol only looks at him with disbelief. This guy really meant it when he said he wanted to eat as much as he can.
“What are you? A bear? Can you even finish all those foods?”
“You said I can eat as much as you can. I’m starving, and Kyungsoo won’t be home until 11 because he still has two cataract surgeries to do.” Jongin puts his phone away, shrugging. Ah, yes. Jongin is Kyungsoo’s husband. While Jongin is a surgeon, Kyungsoo is an ophthalmologist. Kyungsoo’s work burden is less than Jongin, but sometimes he still has some operations to do too. Chanyeol, until this day still amazes at how both of them handle their relationship with their busy schedules. Sometimes Chanyeol finds them sleeping together (as in really sleeping) at the on-call rooms, both too tired to even go home. The hospital is definitely their second home.
Chanyeol himself, is afraid of having a relationship. Not everyone is understanding. And even if they understand, the next question is until when? He has experienced it first hand himself and it’s not something he wants to go through again.
“What are you thinking about?” Jongin puts a halt to Chanyeol’s train of thoughts. Chanyeol shakes his head, trying to shoo away the unnecessary things inside his head. He is not interested on searching the special someone or dating for now. Mrs. Lee comes to their table to put on foods enough to feed the whole country (Okay, Chanyeol that’s too much), they thank Mrs. Lee together. “By the way, have you heard the news?”
Chanyeol looks up from blowing air to his still hot stew, “What news?”
“There’s a new surgeon coming around last week? A transfer from the Bucheon branch of the hospital. Fresh graduate.” Jongin answers, stirring his stew slowly. “And then..? Transfer to and from hospital are not something rare, Jongin… It happens all the time.”
Jongin smiles, “Aren’t you curious? I heard he’s the same age as you, and I heard from the nurses that he’s cute.”
Chanyeol groans, “No, not again Jongin.”
“Oh come on!” Jongin claims, “Maybe this one will make you move on from Sehun!”
“Sehun is soooo last year, I’ve already--”
“--moved on and living my life blah blah. Okay, I trust you. But don’t you think it’s time to open your heart for someone new? It’s not wrong though.”
“It’s not…” Chanyeol thinks for a second, “but I’m not rushing it. I’m taking it slowly. And now, I heard you and Kyungsoo are planning to adopt soon?”
At the topic of adoption, Jongin’s eyes light up in pure excitement. “Yes!” He answers happily, and continuing to tell Chanyeol about all the process and all the kids he’s met at the orphanage so far. Phew, plan successful.
---
Chanyeol meets doctor Byun again about one week later, at the rooftop of the hospital. The place is usually empty, so it’s a bit of surprise to see the other this time. The rooftop has been Chanyeol’s secret hiding place, the place he’ll go when he feels too stressed out about the cases he has to deal day by day. The place gives him a chance to be at peace in the middle of the bustling hospital.
The other is seated at one of the benches, looking surprised all the same when his eyes meet Chanyeol from afar.
“Hey, we meet again.” Chanyeol greets as he sits next to doctor Byun. The other acknowledges him with a slight nod and a smile, “Didn’t expect to see you here, Mr. Cheetos.”
Chanyeol chuckles at the nickname, “The same thing goes for me too.” They are silent after that, letting each other busy with their own thoughts as they both stare at the blue sky. The wind blows and Chanyeol closes his eyes to rest them, silently thankful for his companion who shares the same sentiment to make the moment quiet and peaceful.
After a while, Chanyeol finally breaks the silence. “Is it just me getting old forgetting about people or I definitely never saw you around here before, are you new?”
The other nods, eyes still closed. “I just transferred here from the Bucheon branch about two weeks ago.” Baekhyun offers his hand out, “I’m Byun Baekhyun.”
And suddenly Chanyeol remembers his conversation with Jongin few days back at the restaurant. “Ah, that one. I heard about you from Jongin. I’m Park Chanyeol, by the way.”Chanyeol sees as Baekhyun's eyes widen after he hears Chanyeol introduces himself, like he's realizing something. "You're the supervisor surgeon Doctor Kim said?" Baekhyun quickly stand up and bows in sorry, "Oh my God, i'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, sunbae for being unpoli--"
"Hsssssh," Chanyeol stops Baekhyun who is still bowing. "It's okay Baekhyun, I don't mind. I don't even know what do you think you did wrong." Baekhyun stops bowing but he's still not saying anything.
"And, don't call me sunbae, please." Chanyeol adds after a quick thought, "The only thing I am a senior to you is me being in this hospital for longer than you. Other than that, we're equal. We're both doctors already, aren't we?"
Baekhyun timidly nods, before braving himself to look up to Chanyeol. "Thank you, Doctor Park."
"Nah! One more thing, just call me Chanyeol. You saying doctor Park will only remind me of my dad. Which nothing is wrong with that but it makes me feel old. Jongin told me we're in the same age, and it's been a while that I have a same aged friends around here."
"Al-alright, Chanyeol."
Chanyeol smiles, he hopes Baekhyun will be fun to work with. They may have a lot of things to do together in the long run. Now it is Chanyeol's turn to offer his hand, "I hope a good team-work from you Doctor Byun. Welcome to the hospital."
---
The chance to work together comes a bit faster than Chanyeol thinks. There is an emergency operation one Saturday evening. Being single and no family waiting at home for some weekend family time, Chanyeol responds to the call followed by gratitude from the more senior ones for letting them off the hook this time. He also asks the nurses to call for any surgeon available to scrub in.
The other surgeon is not there yet when Chanyeol is done changing into the scrub suit, he plans to wait but then it is an emergency so he decides to start the operation first. The surgeon joins him in the middle of him analyzing the patient’s abdomen, the other is panting so hard like he just ran a mile. It’s Baekhyun. Chanyeol smiles at him as a greeting, but of course Baekhyun doesn’t see it because Chanyeol wears a mask.
“I’m so-- sorry, I’m la--”
“It’s okay, Baekhyun.” Chanyeol cuts in before Baekhyun suffocates himself by trying to talk. “Now, calm down your breath. Do you have any idea what’s possibly this patient has? Has the nurse briefed you on the way here?”
Baekhyun walks closer to the bedside to look closer. His mind’s reeling to work as he takes in the general appearance of the patient (which doesn’t really help much in his opinion, because the patient’s sedated), and taking in the information stated by one of the nurse about the patient’s acute condition just before going into operation.
After a while, Baekhyun looks up at Chanyeol with a confident smile. “I assume the patient got acute appendicitis. And what you’re doing right now is oblique muscle-splitting incision, with approach from the taeniae.”
“Ding-dong-daeng.” Chanyeol sing-songs playfully, his hands still skillfully moving to free the patient’s tissue. “Is there any other approach we could use other than this? Any other method?”
“You can go for a transverse incision or a conservative midline incision. Or, you can use another method which is by using the laparoscopy.”
Chanyeol straightens his body once Baekhyun is done answering, his hands stop mid-air. “I am sure you already know the way for this procedure, so I’m going to give this task to you. Please, doctor Byun. Take my place.”
“Eh?” Baekhyun’s eyes widen in surprise. Just like every time Chanyeol whispers some hospital secrets to him from time to time, Chanyeol finds it.. endearing. “Any problem, doctor Byun?”
“No-no, it’s clearly not a problem. But, I’m a new surgeon here. Are you sure you’ll allow me to do this procedure doctor Park?”
“They said you are one of the best new surgeon in Bucheon. So.. let’s see whether it’s true or false?” Chanyeol provokes jokingly, and he is sure successful once he sees the spirit in Baekhyun’s eyes alights. Chanyeol steps backwards to give Baekhyun his previous space, before moving around the bed to be on the other side. “I’ll be right here watching you, doctor Byun. Don’t worry, I’ll intervene as soon as something goes wrong.”
Baekhyun only nods as an answer before holding out his one hand, “Scalpel, please.”
Twenty minutes into the surgery and there’s no other voice other than Baekhyun’s, whether asking for change in surgery instrument or for some help in suctioning blood. Chanyeol glances at Baekhyun for the umpteenth time that day, taking in the sight of Baekhyun’s concentrating face. The Byun Baekhyun in front of him is so far with his playful image he’s always shown outside the operation room. Truth to be told, even though Chanyeol was the one who told Baekhyun to be comfortable with him but sometimes he doesn’t expect Baekhyun’s friendliness and because he isn’t used to that, it makes him uncomfortable at first. But soon he learns that it’s only how Baekhyun is.
Chanyeol doesn’t know how long he stares at the other until he is brought back to the real word by hand waving right in front of his face, startling him. Chanyeol blinks his eyes, “Are you done?” Baekhyun doesn’t answer directly, but only pointing down for Chanyeol to look at the stitched wound on the patient’s right side abdomen. “Done, and clear. I’m already signed him for some antibiotics to prevent any infections.”
“Dammit, you’re really as good as they said Baekhyun.” Chanyeol compliments as they make their way out of the operation room. They put out their bloodied scrub suit (and Chanyeol tries so hard not to peek at the smooth skin hiding under Baekhyun’s scrub. Jongin is right.. Chanyeol has been single for too long already, he can’t even keep his heart rate calm when he sees another guy changing in front of him) before changing into their clothes.
“I’m sorry to bother you on weekends, Baekhyun.” Chanyeol turns around to face the smaller (who’s already clothed, thank God). “It’s just I think it would be better to have some assistance.”
“Some assistance or you just want to test me, too?” Baekhyun strikes back jokingly, which earns a laugh from Chanyeol. “Well, maybe that’s too. But, really, I’m sorry.”
Baekhyun waves his hand dismissively, “It’s okay, Chanyeol. I’ve been wanting to put my hands into work since I’ve moved here. Clearly didn’t expect you to give me full control of the operation this soon, but nonetheless, thank you.”
“I know you would do great, that’s why.” Chanyeol takes a glance at his phone, it’s already 9 p.m. Time flies so fast when you’re in the operation room. “And by the way, it’s past dinner time and I’m sure you haven’t eaten. Wanna go grab dinner together?”
Baekhyun doesn’t have the time to say anything before his stomach answers it by it’s sound, which makes Baekhyun flushes in embarrassment. Chanyeol lets out a small laugh and slings his arm over Baekhyun’s shoulder, “So, what do you want for dinner? It’s on me, because you’ve done a good job today!”
“Chanyeol, you don’t have to. I’ll just grab some chips at the vending machine.”
“But I want to!” Chanyeol insists, before adding “And it’s not good to always eat junk food. Come one! You have to try this restaurant, it’s me and Jongin’s favorite.”
Baekhyun finally nods, “But I pay the next time we eat together.”
Chanyeol sends his gummy smile as an answer, “Accepted!”
---
After the dinner together that night, they rarely cross path again after that. Chanyeol is busy with the new case he is assigned to, and as for Baekhyun, he heard from the nurses that Baekhyun is busy too because he is said to work together with a professor from another hospital for a hard case. Chanyeol is passing the hallway near the geriatric ward when he spots someone familiar sitting on one of the empty bench looking at the park.
It’s Baekhyun.
Chanyeol decides to greet the other and maybe chat for a while, so he walks closer and plops himself down next to Baekhyun. The figure besides him remains still, which is a bit unusual seeing how loud and active Baekhyun is in daily life.
“Baekhyun?” Chanyeol finally decides to call when there’s a tear coming out from the corner of Baekhyun’s eyes, which quickly wiped away by the other once he realizes Chanyeol’s presence.
“Hey, Chanyeol.” Baekhyun smiles, and Chanyeol feels a bit uncomfortable with how forceful it is. He might now know Baekhyun for long, but he’s seen how the other interacts with the other doctors and staffs at the hospital from afar. Baekhyun is loud, and talkative. Two points that make him befriends other people easily. He’s always smiling. And seeing how he has to force himself to smile, there must be something horribly wrong.
“Hey, what happened?”
At Chanyeol’s question, Baekhyun breaks out in a fit of tears. His body shakes uncontrollably and his voice comes out really broken. Chanyeol doesn’t know where he gets the urge, all he knows is he has to calm Baekhyun down so he pulls Baekhyun into a hug.
He doesn’t know how long Baekhyun cries into his chest, but he lets him. Not minding the wetness seeping to his white coat. Chanyeol keeps stroking Baekhyun’s hair slowly, what he does every time he calms his niece down, and just wait until Baekhyun finishes.
After a while, Baekhyun has finally calmed down. The other pulls himself back from Chanyeol’s embrace, wiping his face with his palm on the process. Chanyeol doesn’t miss the pink tint on both of Baekhyun’s cheeks, and his heart somehow silently cheers at the possibility of him being the reason of it. What the nurse said is right, Baekhyun is indeed cute. Even with hair pointing at different directions, Chanyeol finds him cute nonetheless.
They are both silent for a while, with Baekhyun still trying to regulate his breathing and keeping down the sobs. Once again, Chanyeol waits for Baekhyun to start talking whenever he wants to.
“There is this patient assigned to me, a grandpa with a bit of a rare case.” Baekhyun starts, “Me and the other doctors already tried every treatment stated on the books, trying from one thing to another one. But it never works.
We always come back with bad news every time the grandpa has finished one of the therapy plan. I keep asking for forgiveness every time but the grandpa always says to me that there is nothing to be sorry for. In turn, he always thanks me and the other doctors for trying so hard to help him. He’s still smiling and being positive despite all of that.”
Baekhyun takes a deep breath before continuing, “This morning during our daily check-ups, we just knew from his daughter that his father hasn’t woken up at all since last night. Not even responding to voices, movement or even pain.”
“The grandpa fell into coma, and his survival chance decreases to no more than 10%.” Baekhyun sighs, “I feel like I’ve failed myself. Like every seconds I’ve spent learning from the medical school are all for nothing because I can’t do anything to help this grandpa.”
Baekhyun’s voice is getting thinner and thinner with each words so Chanyeol reaches out for his hand and wraps it with his palm, squeezing it lightly. Baekhyun stops talking, and Chanyeol can hears the small sobs coming out from the smaller once again. “I know how you felt… I’ve been through that a lot but there is this one case that left an impression to me.”
Without waiting for any response, Chanyeol continues. “This women suffered from a breast cancer years ago. She went through surgeries after surgeries, not to mention the chemotherapy but instead of decreasing, the cancer cells spread throughout her body. She was in massive massive pain. There is no pain medication written in the text book that can help her ease the pain. I can only stare with helplessness every time she screamed because the pain just got unbearable.”
“After months and months living in the hospital, at one Saturday morning, she finally passed away in her sleep surrounded by her beloved husband and children. You know what? They didn’t cry. At all. Not a single tear.” Baekhyun looks up at Chanyeol, face confused. “How?”
“I asked them, because it just looked so weird right? And your mind must have filled with negative thoughts about the family like you might think that the family planned her death or something.”
“I don’t,” Baekhyun defends himself, but seeing his reaction Chanyeol knows the thought must’ve crossed the other’s mind even for a while. Chanyeol chuckles.
“They said, they didn’t cry because they were happy for her.” Chanyeol says, looking straight into Baekhyun’s eyes. “She finally could rest peacefully, without any pain. At least, they said, her suffering finally came to an end. They already accepted it all, for them it was better to see her not hurting.”
“So, Baekhyun. There is only so much we can do as a doctor. And sometimes, we will feel helpless too. But don’t worry, because what’s important is we do the best to our ability every time. Then, any effort won’t go to waste.”
Baekhyun doesn’t say anything after that, too busy with his own thoughts. Chanyeol stays there, in case Baekhyun cries again or even needs a shoulder to lie on. He won’t leave until he makes sure Baekhyun feels better.
The sound of someone’s pager going off breaks out their bubble of silence, and it turns out to be Baekhyun. After seeing what’s on the screen, he turns at his side to Chanyeol, “The team called me for afternoon check up at the grandpa. I have to go now.”
Chanyeol nods and smiles, “All the best hopes for the case, doctor Byun.”
“Chanyeol-ah,”
“Hmm?”
“Thank you so much.” And with a small smile accompanied with a hesitant wave, Baekhyun turns around and disappears behind the corner.
---
There is a big accident near the hospital one day, and the ER is in need of extra doctors so Chanyeol is heading there once his current surgery is done.
And.. it’s true.
The ER is in a complete chaos once he’s there. Doctors and nurses are all over the place, trying to save every patients that wheeled in through the double door. Nurses with bottles of alcohol and povidone, doctors coming in and out from the makeshift rooms separated by curtains. And despite the room is already full, there are still patients wheeled into the room and need to be attended.
Chanyeol doesn’t know how much patients he has handled until now, his body working automatically examining and tending to the patient’s needs based on the information given by the paramedics. He is just done doing the stitches on one of the patient’s head, and he’s now heading to the front door to attend another patient waiting.
This time is a girl, her eyes are closed and there’s a nasty bleeding coming out of her nose. “The girl got stuck under a car for a while, there is open fracture at the femur and also suspected organ bleeding. She was found awake but slowly deteriorating. Her blood pressure keeps dropping.” Chanyeol scans the girl quickly and figures that he won’t be able to treat this girl alone. When he’s about to ask for help, a voice comes from his side. “We’ll take this girl now.”
It’s Baekhyun, and Chanyeol sees as the other quickly jumps into action. Pulling out his flashlight, the other checks the girl’s eyes. “GCS score 9, and her pupils are reacting normally. I’ll examine the extent of her head trauma, you can examine her leg.”
Chanyeol barks out instructions for the nurses around him to put on IV, and inject some drugs after the IV has been set up. He grabs a scissors from the table and cuts the girl’s jeans for him to look at the fracture clearly, and good God it is indeed a nasty fracture. “Prepare an OR for me, CITO” Chanyeol informs the nurse beside him, not forgetting to ask for more RL ready because the girl lost lots of blood and needs to be replaced quickly.
Baekhyun is now standing by the patient’s abdomen, pressing and searching for any indication of pain or bleeding. The other looks up at Chanyeol, “There’s nothing to be worried about the head trauma, it’s only a scratch at the scalp. But I need to do USG for the patient abdomen, I’m still not sure about the internal bleeding.”
“Can you do it in the OR? I need to bring her in.”
“It’s possible,” Baekhyun calls one of the nurses to prepare the USG machine inside the OR and pulls up the handrails on the sides of the bed. Chanyeol does the same and they wheel the girl down pass the corridor to the available OR room.
Thankfully the surgery goes by without any serious complications. Even in the middle Baekhyun needs to open up the girl’s abdomen because he confirmed internal bleeding through USG. Chanyeol finishes his procedure first, and gets into helping Baekhyun immediately. The source is quickly found, and they can stabilize the girl’s blood pressure before it drops to dangerous level.
“Got something on your mind, doc?” Baekhyun takes a glance at Chanyeol for a while, before asking for another forceps from the nurse. “You seem spaced out.” Baekhyun adds. Chanyeol doesn’t know how long he’s been silent until Baekhyun popped his bubble of thoughts. He is now waiting for Baekhyun to close the girl’s abdomen. Chanyeol focuses back his attention to Baekhyun now, who is handling the patient with utmost concentration across from him. He catches a small smile of satisfaction forming underneath the face mask on the smaller’s face once he’s done and it sends Chanyeol’s heart beating faster.
“Nothing, nothing.” Chanyeol shakes his head, trying to calm his heart.
Is it the adrenaline? Or sugar rush? Or.. something.
---
They head out fifteen minutes later, after dumping their gown at the dust bin and change into another set of fresh cloth. The girl’s parents are waiting for them outside the OR, quickly coming up to them as soon as they come out. The parents can’t stop thanking the two doctors, bowing profusely until Baekhyun asks them to stop. They talk for a while before bidding goodbye to Chanyeol and Baekhyun and go see their daughter at the ward.
“Where are you going, now?” Baekhyun asks when Chanyeol also excuses himself.
“I think I’m going to be at the doctor’s lounge. I have another surgery in two hours.”
“Do you want to go eat? My mom sent me lots of side dishes yesterday.” Baekhyun offers, eyes everywhere but looking at Chanyeol. Is he nervous? Chanyeol wonders inside his head. “Clearly too much for only one person. Count it as me paying you back for the dinner the other day? And for calming me down days ago? My apartment is not too far from here.”
Chanyeol finds himself agreeing at the offer. Having dinner before his another surgery indeed sounds good. Baekhyun’s place is also not that far, making it practical to just go back and forth. It’s definitely a break from the cafeteria’s food and the vending machine junk food he’s been eating for the past days.
“You can just sit at the living room first, I’ll heat up the food.” Baekhyun says before walking into the kitchen, leaving Chanyeol at the living room alone. Being a curious cat, instead of sitting, he walks around to look at the photographs spreaded around. Some in frames, some pasted at the bookshelves or the wall, some being hung on the thin string hanging from one side of the room to another. Chanyeol chuckles at some, Byun Baekhyun during childhood is cute.
“What are you laughing at?”
Chanyeol turns around to face Baekhyun who is now standing near him, hands on both sides of his waist looking at Chanyeol suspiciously. “Your ears are big during childhood, I thought I was the only baby with big ears in the world.”
“Your ears are still big, Chanyeol. In case you didn’t know.” Baekhyun scoffs, “And by the way, the food is now ready. Come on.”
They talk about each other during dinner. Chanyeol finds out that Baekhyun decided to be a doctor because of his grandma. The other’s grandma died when he was in junior high because of cancer, and that’s why he wants to study about the disease that claimed his grandma’s life. “What about you? Why do you want to be a doctor?”
Chanyeol lets himself chew his food first and swallow before starts talking, “Actually, I didn’t want to be a doctor at first. It was all because my parents asked me too. I could’ve denied the request, but my mother was sick at that time. So I didn’t have the heart to say no.”
“Was it hard? I mean, going through the medical school because you want is hard already. Moreover when you don’t want to do it at the first place?”
“It was hard, I admit.” Chanyeol nods, “And I resented it a lot at first. I didn’t study, I skipped class, I did everything bad possible. But then I got into clinic, and seeing the smiles from the patient’s family.. I think that’s the reason I’ve decided to stay. The feeling is really rewarding.”
“I feel you,” Baekhyun says, staring at Chanyeol’s eyes from across the table and smiles. “And you’re a great doctor now. Your parents must be so proud of you.”
---
After that night, it becomes a routine. A thing between the two of them. Chanyeol sometimes finds Baekhyun at the doctor’s lounge after his shift, and turned out the other is waiting for him to head for dinner together. Chanyeol even finds himself re-arranging his surgeries so he can finish right before or after Baekhyun’s, so they can head out for food together afterwards.
The other is funny, loud, talkative. A bit change from the seniors from the surgery department, who is always serious and proper every time. Even a change from Jongin who doesn’t really talkative when he doesn’t feel like it sometimes. They find out the same interest in music, spending time after dinner one night at the noraebang until morning which ended up with them getting late for the morning shift at the ER.
Chanyeol loves bowling, Baekhyun can’t throw any ball to save his life so Chanyeol came to the rescue one day and dragged the other to the bowling alley. In turn, Baekhyun took the taller to a PC room to play online games. Only to end up losing to Chanyeol’s team by the end of the night.
It feels so much like university days once again, and Chanyeol is enjoying it to bits.
Baekhyun makes he enjoys coming to work, always excited at the things they’ll do for the night. It doesn’t get tiring easily now.
They share encouragement in the form of smiles thrown at each other at surgeries, knowing stares at each other, or even simple gesture like pat on the back.
Sometimes at those nights where their schedule won’t meet and Chanyeol has to work overtime, Chanyeol finds bottled energy drink or coffee on top of the coffee table at the doctor’s lounge. There is a post-it with his name written on it, pasted on the front.
Chanyeol makes sure to leave some for the other too for nights that should be spent at the hospital because of surgeries or papers.
It’s really nice to have someone to share the burden of handling a hard case with someone with the same level of understanding. He can talk about his work, and also be given feedbacks. His previous partner rarely did that to him before, they would mostly changed the conversation to another topic because they didn’t understand what Chanyeol was talking about. Chanyeol is actually used to it already, but it’s a different kind of feeling now.
And it’s a nice one.
---
“I see you’re getting close to the new guy.” Jongin pipes as he sits at the chair across from Chanyeol, who has his head on the table with eyes closed. He just finishes his shift for the day, and it was an exhausting 12 hours shift. At Jongin’s words, Chanyeol opens his eyes. “New guy? You mean Baekhyun?”
“Hmm, hmm.” Jongin answers from behind his cup of coffee.
“He’s nice. And definitely more loyal than you because you dump me a lot for Kyungsoo.” Chanyeol huffs, “And else, what do you expect? For me to be unfriendly to him while we’ll surely have to work together in the future?”
Jongin raises both of his arms, as in surrendering. “Woah, woah. No need to get defensive, man. By the way you should go home and rest already. It looks like you’re going to sleep any moment.”
“I think I’m going to crash at Baekhyun’s tonight.”
Jongin whistles, a smirk is forming on his face already. “Woohoo! You guys are already that far? Sleeping at each other’s bed now?”
“YA! We’re not in a relationship like that, only as friends?”
“Like I would believe that. Friends certainly don’t look at each other like that.”
Chanyeol doesn’t answer this time, which is a bit odd because that guy always has answer to every Jongin’s tease. So Jongin pokes him a few times on the head. The closest he gets as answer is a soft snore, “Ya! Chanyeol! Don’t sleep here on the cafetaria. Ya! Ya!”
---
Today is the day of the big surgery for one of Baekhyun’s patient, the grandpa’s case he’s been working diligently for the last six months. The reason for Baekhyun’s breakdown before. The team finally found an approach to dissect the tumor residing inside the grandpa’s cranium. Chanyeol sees how much all nighter Baekhyun pulled the past few weeks, burying himself in papers and books to make sure everything goes well.
It is Saturday, and Chanyeol should’ve used it for sleeping the whole day like he used to. But he drops by the hospital as a moral support for Baekhyun. He doesn’t have to, but he wants to.
He spots the other in front of the OR room, walking back-to-back from left to right anxiously. There are other surgeons sitting at the long chairs near Baekhyun, seemingly nervous as well.
“Hey,” Chanyeol taps Baekhyun’s shoulder, surprising the other. Baekhyun turns around with wide eyes but he smiles as he spots it’s Chanyeol. “Hey.”
“Don’t be nervous.” Chanyeol ruffles Baekhyun’s hair. “You got this.”
It’s not long before Baekhyun is called by his team, they are going to go through the procedure once again before starting the real surgery. The patient is already at the OR, being prepared by the nurses and the anesthesiologist. Baekhyun turns around to face Chanyeol once again after signalling his team to go first and he’ll follow soon. Chanyeol clearly doesn’t expect the kiss and hug that followed.
It’s just a simple kiss. Or maybe it can’t even be called a kiss, but a peck. But it sends Chanyeol’s heart beating faster all the same.
Baekhyun hides his face at Chanyeol’s chest, and because of that he doesn’t see the blank look on Chanyeol’s face with both arms still in the air. Few seconds pass and Chanyeol finally finds it in him to hug Baekhyun back, resting his cheek on top of Baekhyun’s soft hair. He can’t help but smile.
They stay at that position for a few seconds more, before Chanyeol pulls back, still minding that they are in the middle of hospital’s hallway and Baekhyun still has a surgery to attend. The talk can wait until after the surgery. Baekhyun has his head down, clearly embarassed to the core. Chanyeol brings Baekhyun’s head up with his fingers, staring at the other straight in the eye.
“Remember that any effort…”
“...won’t go to waste.” Baekhyun cuts in the middle, bringing a smile to Chanyeol’s face because the other looks very much more confidence in himself. So different with the Baekhyun who had a breakdown at the hospital hallway months ago. Chanyeol pulls the other into a hug once again, and tightens it for a while before finally pulling back for real.
“Good luck doctor Byun.”
---
The surgery takes a lot of time, and Chanyeol wants to be there as soon as Baekhyun is out. So he decides to hang out by the doctor’s lounge, munching on snacks while watching the TV. Not in his three years working at the hospital he ever thinks he’ll be able to leisurely spending his time at the doctor’s lounge. He usually will be too tired when he enters the room late at night, all he remembers about the memory of this room are sleep, sleep, and sleep.
Two hours into the movie playing on the TV, Chanyeol fell asleep. He wakes up when someone barges into the room, and it turns out to be Wendy. Chanyeol remembers seeing Wendy at the group waiting in front of the OR just before, so he must be one of the surgeon for Baekhyun’s team. Wendy gives him a nod as acknowledgement when their eyes meet, before sluggishly walking to the mini bar to search for something to eat.
“How was the surgery? Did he make it?”
Wendy doesn’t answer immediately, she pulls out a box of milk from the fridge before facing Chanyeol. She shakes his head slowly, face somber. “He didn’t make it.”
---
Baekhyun went first after the surgery, he didn’t tell us where he’d go. That’s Wendy’s answer when Chanyeol asks her where’s Baekhyun. Chanyeol immediately runs out of the room to get to the OR, only to find the room empty with Baekhyun nowhere to be found. The other surgeons on Baekhyun’s team he meets at the hallways also don’t know where the petite surgeon went.
Chanyeol is about to give up searching throughout the hospital and wanting to get straight to Baekhyun’s apartment to see whether Baekhyun is there or not, when he realizes there is one place at the hospital he hasn’t checked.
Chanyeol’s hiding place.
The rooftop.
There is a familiar figure with it’s back on him when Chanyeol finally arrives at the rooftop. He knows with his heart that it’s Baekhyun. Chanyeol walks closer to him, ears aware for any hints of sobbing. But, there is none. Baekhyun is quietly sitting there, starring at the slowly reddening sky.
It’s almost time for the sunset.
Chanyeol quietly takes a place next to Baekhyun. The other doesn’t respond with words, but only moves closer to Chanyeol and lays his head there. They might have something waiting to be talked between each other. Chanyeol himself has thousand of questions in his mind.
But this, Chanyeol thinks, this is an answer enough.
For now.
“He didn’t make it….” Baekhyun says, eyes slowly closing.
“What do you feel about it?”
“I don’t know,” Baekhyun sighs, “but what I know for sure, that I’ve done my best. And because of that, my mind is finally in peace.”
The temperature is starting to lower, but Chanyeol doesn’t have the heart to ask Baekhyun to move inside. Chanyeol circles one of his arm around Baekhyun’s shoulder, pulling the other closer to his embrace so they can share the heat. The other looks so beaten up,but content, Chanyeol lets the static noise from the hustle bustle below to lull Baekhyun to sleep.
Just before he rests his eyes too, Chanyeol lands a kiss on top of Baekhyun’s head. “Sleep well, Baekhyun.”
They’ll have a long talk later.
---