"I am away from him! That's why I called you! You're supposed to be happy with me."
"Sorry. I am happy, okay? What did he want?"
"He came up to me in the produce section and he asked if I remembered him. But you told me to ignore him so I did. But he kept talking anyway! How rude! And he said to tell you that if you don't show up on Monday that he's going to come to Junes for it instead. He didn't say what 'it' was. And then he picked up a cucumber and told me to bring it home so you could practice. He said maybe you should teach me how to do it too. But he didn't say what 'it' was again. Do you need a cucumber, Yosuke? Are we making salad? Nana-chan likes salad."
Yosuke would have laughed at the sheer ridiculousness of it, like some bad pun from a 70s porno, if it wasn't for the gravity of the situation.
"I don't need a cucumber. Neither do you. Your shift is over. Souji and I will come get you."
"I still have another two hours."
"Not anymore. Staff change."
"He's still here."
"Go outside and ignore him. Don't let him even talk at you. Okay?"
Re: Thread 73/?
anonymous
March 31 2012, 04:30:08 UTC
Ooooh this update. So much to love. Souji/Yosuke, Teddie's phone call (and that cute little bear emote), that last little voice of sanity in the anon thread, and of course the promise of epic showdown to come. I'M EXCITED. This fic is my crack.
Re: Thread 73/?
anonymous
March 31 2012, 21:23:21 UTC
DEAR AUTHORNON
Tonight I'm awake at midnight eating butter crunch ice cream & listening to Spill Canvas & Bright Eyes (yea yea everybody laugh at poor anon) when suddenly Touch came on & I thought of this fill & this Yosuke & then my ice cream was saltier cause my tears were in it. Thought you'd like to know.
Re: Thread 73/?
anonymous
April 2 2012, 18:27:36 UTC
One really has to wonder why these children have nothing better to do with their lives than fuck up someone else's. I fully agree with that last person in the thread, WHY ARE THEY SO DETERMINED TO SCREW YOSUKE OVER?
No, seriously. I feel like people have to have a reason to be THIS cruel.
I said all this to say that I love this story and when you update I squeal. Also, Souji is the best boyfriend ever.
Yosuke let out a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding when Teddie trotted up to them, looking no worse for wear, and attached himself to Souji as though he hadn't seen him in 500 years. Damn bear. He was eating an ice cream bar, probably billed to Yosuke, and gestured vaguely with the stick to the vicinity of the entrance.
"That guy you told me not to talk to left a while ago."
"Did he say anything else to you?"
"Nope! Can we go home now? I'm hungry and I have to finish training my dragon."
Yosuke rolled his eyes. Oh well. He'd rather have Teddie here, annoying him, than talking to Seagull about cucumbers. He met Souji's eyes over the top of Teddie's head and Souji actually looked amused. Yosuke's annoyance melted into a smile. It was hard to be pissed off when Teddie was chattering happily and Souji was smiling gently and it was warm enough to almost be summer. He had a fleeting thought, a selfish thought, that if he could freeze the world just as it was, just like this, that he would do it, no matter how it affected anyone else. It was good, like this, with Teddie's sticky hand leaving fingerprints on his shirt every time he poked at him for no reason and Souji beside him, reassuring and confident as always. Yosuke didn't notice how close they were to home until they were standing outside and Souji was saying something he couldn't quite make out.
"Yosuke? Are you listening?"
"Sorry, partner."
"I was saying I'll come by tomorrow morning and we'll walk to school together. Okay?"
"Yeah. Okay. Thanks."
"See you tomorrow, then."
Souji grabbed his hand just for a moment, squeezed his fingers, and then released them, headed for home. Yosuke watched him go until the shape of him melted into the horizon and then went inside, sat on the couch and watched Teddie play video games and eat chips. Tomorrow. His heart was racing. He didn't know whether it would be better to hope that everybody knew or nobody knew. If everybody knew, it would be a really awful day but then it would be over all at once, sort of like ripping off a Band-Aid, and if he could get through the initial humiliation, all he'd have to do was wait for another Nagoya to show up, someone else to fuck up, and they'd all be onto the next thing, the next dog pile. Or, if only a few people knew... well, they'd whisper, sure, they'd talk, but Souji being there would contain the damage, right? Souji had been incredibly popular. There was no way they would think a guy like Souji would want to be around a guy like him if everything they were saying was really true.
I guess I'll find out tomorrow.
Teddie didn't even blink when Yosuke stood up, too involved in the game to notice if Yosuke caught fire, and Yosuke decided he might as well go to bed and get a head start on not being able to sleep. There was a sheet of paper on his desk that he nearly overlooked, carefully folded.
Yosuke laughed, covering his mouth to keep anyone else from hearing and thinking he had lost it. Souji was so weird sometimes. Maybe he'd manage to get some sleep after all. He lay down, closed his eyes, but when sleep crept up on him it was restless. His dreams had no substance but were uncomfortable all the same, sensations of falling and jerking awake, and he spent the early hours of morning in a twilight sleep, half-conscious and half not. He wondered if this was how people felt when they were on drugs, things they shot into their veins to dull pain or make them forget, and Yosuke thought he understood why someone would do that, how things could get so bad inside your head that you'd take a chance like that to avoid it, how you'd give up everything else in your life for a few hours of peace.
He forced himself fully awake when his alarm demanded it, pulled on his uniform and stared at himself in the mirror. His hands were shaking as he buttoned his jacket and he tried to will them to be still, finding it harder than he would have liked it to be. Yosuke was still stationed in front of the mirror when there was a knock at the door and he hurried to answer it. Souji was there, back in his uniform - where he belongs - with the third year pin on his collar - where it belongs - and Yosuke was so relieved to see him, so absurdly relieved, like he had been wondering if he had somehow imagined the past couple of days in the previous evening's near delirium. He checked his pocket and found Souji's note still there, safely tucked inside where he had placed it the night before.
"Ready?"
"Let's do this."
---
If this were a movie, Yosuke would have found the reactions to him and Souji walking into school to be almost comical in their conflict. The whispers began the second their feet crossed the foyer, but they were only whispers - only because of Souji, he knew, on his own he would have been confronted within seconds, probably with pictures shoved in his face - and more than once he caught someone staring at them openly, not even trying to be discreet, clearly weighing whether it was more important to make fun of Yosuke or to try to stay on Souji's good side, which was the path to "cool," whatever the hell that was these days, but which would also be mutually exclusive to making fun of Yosuke. He almost would have preferred the confrontation to the staring. The hallway fell silent, he could feel the eyes on him, he wanted to sink into the floor or run or... but Souji kept walking, expressionless, head held high and looking straight ahead as though completely unfazed, and Yosuke concentrated on keeping pace with him, walking in step with him, keeping his eyes on the floor until they reached their lockers.
Yosuke knew what he would find before he opened it - had expected it really - but had not expected to find the same thing in Souji's, plastered all over it, the first picture he had posted, the one he had taken during Souji's visit, screenshots from the feed... and sitting in the middle of it, a tiny throwaway video camera playing the video from the bathroom, edited to play some scenes over and over in a loop. He glanced over at Souji, still expressionless but clearly stunned at having everything thrust back in his face, and he was about to tell him not to look anymore when Souji suddenly, calmly, reached into his locker and took down the pictures, untaping each one of them with the same determination he used when he was folding envelopes in his room, and then stepping to the side and doing the same thing for Yosuke, finally balling them all up and neatly depositing them, along with the camera, in a nearby trashcan, and everything was still, silent, waiting, until Souji walked over to a second-year boy Yosuke thought he might have known from club activities last year.
"Thank you. Do you happen to know who's been vandalizing my locker?"
"I... don't..."
"I'd really like to know."
"I got it, senpai. If I find out anything... I'll... let you know. Okay?"
The boy took his hand out of his pocket and extended it to Souji, which was something of an odd gesture, Yosuke thought, given the circumstances, but Souji didn't even blink, just grasped his hand and walked away as though everything was perfectly normal. The bell rang for class and the crowd of students dispersed, seemingly reluctantly, as he and Souji hurried to class themselves.
"What was that about?"
Yosuke was muttering under his breath as though the empty hallway could hear him. Maybe it could.
"He knows something."
Yosuke wanted to ask what, but they were already standing outside the door, and all he could do was look at Souji, not speaking. This was the part he had been dreading - having to walk into class alone, without Souji, until he was re-introduced to the class, just for a few minutes but it might as well be a few hours. Souji brushed their fingers together as Yosuke walked past him and through the door, trying to block out everything else except the path to his desk. He felt sick, like he might just throw up on the floor, and wouldn't that be appropriate? the final humiliation, but he kept the bile down, forced his feet one in front of the other, and slid into his seat beside Chie, trying for all he was worth not to keep his head down like he had something to be ashamed of, but really you do, and it was so much easier that way, to pretend they couldn't see him, to try to curl in on himself. Someone threw a crumpled piece of paper at him from across the room, probably one of those photos oh GOD what if everyone HAS THEM - but Yukiko deflected it and it fell to the floor in front of Chie, who lobbed it back at the thrower. Yosuke looked up for the first time. They had to know - both of them - but they still...
And then Yosuke heard the teacher outside, heard her enter the room and start to introduce Souji, and the chatter was instantaneous.
--'think he is, coming back like that'--
--'back? Probably to protect Hanamura, he'--
--'so sad when he left, but if he's really like THAT it's even worse'--
--'wonder what he thought of those pictures'--
--'definitely going to leave Hanamura alone if he's here'--
just like that it was done, Souji was sitting in front of him again, now besides Yukiko instead of Chie, different yet just as it had been, and Yosuke was struck with the ridiculous idea that the four of them were forming their own little island in the middle of the classroom, the only people in the room who weren't consumed with wanting to see him even more humiliated than he already was. He wondered if Kanji and Naoto were doing the same, deflecting things from him, shielding him, and when he remembered the things he had thought about them, about all of them, about Souji... it was all he could do to stay in his seat and stay calm.
Yosuke planned his day as the initial uproar about Souji subsided and the teacher launched into a monotonous lecture. Classroom time was fine, it was mostly lectures and anyone coming at him would have to go through the others and probably wouldn't bother. Lunch was a different story, because then they'd have reign to get up and surround him if they wanted to, but if the four of them could get outside before everyone else grouped up, that would be okay too. Before and after school would be a serious problem, though, if Souji wasn't there, and he couldn't expect Souji to be with him every single day. He was going to have to block them out, ignore them... things he had formerly had a lot of practice with. He had survived it then and he could survive it again. Whatever they threw in his face, it was nothing he hadn't started himself and nothing he couldn't run from.
---
From: Matsubara Ryohei (mryo12@goo.ne.jp) Sent: Saturday, April 21, 2012 09:52:16 To: Kazunari Kenta (bouken55@live.jp)
When lunchtime did roll around, it unfolded just as Yosuke had hoped. Souji led them up to the roof quickly and nobody attempted to follow them, electing instead to stare. Yosuke was tired of staring. What the hell were they looking at? What was so fascinating? Did he suddenly glow purple because he put his ass on the internet? Were they trying to achieve enlightenment by trying to become one with his headphones? Maybe it was just the site of another human being who had done something so abysmally stupid that he had a lot of nerve even showing his face? He wasn't sure.
They met the others and Yosuke found he had been dreading this part most of all, being back in the group with the people he had alienated and screamed at and embarrassed himself in front of, people that used to be his friends and were still his friends, but whom he had allowed himself to corrupt into something else, and he didn't know how to apologize for it. Worse, they had probably seen everything, every picture, that fucking video, and now that would be what they saw every time they looked at him, the skinny pathetic kid they could all easily imagine without clothes because they knew for fucking sure what was under them, and whenever they looked at him they'd see it. He scratched at his arm, wished he could peel off his skin and start over again, not put his body on the internet for every asshole with a monitor to stare at and exploit. How could he ever explain what he had done to his friends?
"Glad you're back, senpai," was the first thing Yosuke heard, from Kanji, and when he took his eyes off the concrete it was clear that Kanji was speaking not just to Souji but to both of them. Yosuke couldn't stand it anymore.
"I'm sorr-" he started to say, but Chie cut him off, grabbed his hand and kicked him in the shin. Well, at least she was acting normally.
"Shut up, Yosuke. Don't. Nothing to apologize for, okay?"
"But I--"
"Chie-senpai is correct. The person whose behavior necessitates an apology is not you, Yosuke-senpai. As to that matter..."
---
From: Kazunari Kenta (bouken55@live.jp) Sent: Saturday, April 21, 2012 11:45:52 To: Matsubara Ryohei (mryo12@goo.ne.jp)
why step it up
why go after hanamura at all
he was our friend once
---
Naoto glanced over to Souji and Souji nodded, produced a piece of paper from his pocket, and Yosuke furrowed his brow, confused.
"What's that?"
"Suzuki-kun passed it to me this morning in the hallway."
Oh. That explained that weird handshake.
The guy who went after Hanamura-senpai is Mori from 2-D. I don't know anything else, Seta-senpai. I'm sorry.
"Does anyone know him?"
Nobody answered. Yosuke stared at the paper blankly. He had no idea who this guy was - had never even heard of him - what the fuck was his problem?
"What are we going to do, Souji-kun?"
Souji didn't respond at first. Yosuke looked over at him, sitting slightly forward with his elbows resting on his knees and his hands folded, and he was hit with another wave of guilt, this one stronger than the ones before it. Until now, he had been thinking only of himself - how embarrassed he was, how afraid he was, wondering what people would think of him, what his friends would think of him, how he was going to get through this - and he had not thought of how Souji was doing today, not once. This was affecting Souji, too, it was embarrassing to him as well, it was damaging his reputation too, but unlike Yosuke, he had done nothing to cause it. Souji hadn't asked to be humiliated, pointed at, whispered about, fucking outed - Yosuke had single-handedly done all of that for him, and it made him sick, and he was sorry, so fucking sorry.
Yosuke couldn't argue with that. If Souji needed to talk to him - for whatever reason - then Yosuke had nothing to say about it. Souji was good at that, good at talking to people, understanding them, influencing them. Yosuke had the distinct feeling that Souji didn't want to have a heart-to-heart chat with this 'Mori,' whoever the hell he was, but that Souji had another goal in mind, something that this guy was just a part of. That was okay. That was how it usually was.
"I want to go with you."
Everyone was silent. If they all just fucking stare at me, I don't think I can take it - but they didn't. Souji just nodded.
"Okay."
"Okay?! Souji, you can't just - he just - hurt him! Yosuke can't--"
"He can. And if he wants to, he should. It's okay."
"Senpai, if you and Yosuke-senpai intend to confront him, it ought to be now. He will not be expecting you to mobilize so quickly."
"Naoto-kun is right. Go now. We'll keep watch."
Now? Yosuke hadn't been expecting it to be now... but would putting it off make it any easier? No, he'd just think about it, roll it over and over in his head until it made him sick and sat like lead in his stomach, until he had thought of every possible way it could go wrong and end badly, until it had him shivering under the blankets with his hair plastered to his forehead by sweat. He hated that, hated that he couldn't be like Souji, that he could never be like Souji. But... if he could never be like Souji, then putting it off was pointless.
"Yosuke?"
Souji was on his feet and Yosuke got to his.
I'm useless, partner, but somehow, with you, I think I can do anything. Even this.
Re: Thread 78/?
anonymous
April 7 2012, 04:51:36 UTC
You go, guys. Fight-o. ;; Man, they're both so brave this update. I think I'd have puked by now, in either of their shoes. Also mentioning again how much I love your Souji characterization.
Teddie ⊂(・(ェ)・)⊃
mobile
"Ted? What's up?"
"Yosuke? That guy is here."
"What guy?"
"The one you told me to be beary rude to!"
"Get away from him, Teddie. Now."
"I am away from him! That's why I called you! You're supposed to be happy with me."
"Sorry. I am happy, okay? What did he want?"
"He came up to me in the produce section and he asked if I remembered him. But you told me to ignore him so I did. But he kept talking anyway! How rude! And he said to tell you that if you don't show up on Monday that he's going to come to Junes for it instead. He didn't say what 'it' was. And then he picked up a cucumber and told me to bring it home so you could practice. He said maybe you should teach me how to do it too. But he didn't say what 'it' was again. Do you need a cucumber, Yosuke? Are we making salad? Nana-chan likes salad."
Yosuke would have laughed at the sheer ridiculousness of it, like some bad pun from a 70s porno, if it wasn't for the gravity of the situation.
"I don't need a cucumber. Neither do you. Your shift is over. Souji and I will come get you."
"I still have another two hours."
"Not anymore. Staff change."
"He's still here."
"Go outside and ignore him. Don't let him even talk at you. Okay?"
"You don't make any sense. Where's Sensei?"
"Getting ready to leave with me. Now go outside!"
"Fine!"
---
File : 575478.png-(1.13 MB, 640x480)
❑ Anonymous 04/20/12(Fri)17:02 No.131927164 [Reply]
HANA-CHAN APPRECIATION THREAD
275 posts and 6 image replies omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> ❑ Anonymous 04/20/12(Fri)17:09 No.131927172
hes from yasogami isn't he
>> ❑ Anonymous 04/20/12(Fri)17:09 No.131927178
mmm he is built like a fucking girl
>> ❑ Anonymous 04/20/12(Fri)17:10 No.131927185
>>131927172
yea I know the guy who took the cock sucking vid lol
>> ❑ Anonymous 04/20/12(Fri)17:10
No.131927197
fuck i want to cum on his face
>> ❑ Anonymous 04/20/12(Fri)17:11 No.131927199
why do u all want to destroy this kid
---
From: Matsubara Ryohei (mryo12@goo.ne.jp)
Sent: Friday, April 20, 2012 18:59:13
To: Kazunari Kenta (bouken55@live.jp)
i hear hanamura's fucking BOYFRIEND re-enrolled at yasogami
he must have gone cryin to him
what a little bitch
man im gonna get him so fucked up he ain't even gonna know what hit him
Reply
And man, I hope Souji finds Ryohei and Seagull and Hassou Tobi's their asses into the ground...
Reply
Oh damn it, now I am laughing and crying at the same time.
I love every minute of this fic, thank you for it. <3
Reply
SOUJI GON MESS YOU UP FO SHO
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Reply
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Tonight I'm awake at midnight eating butter crunch ice cream & listening to Spill Canvas & Bright Eyes (yea yea everybody laugh at poor anon) when suddenly Touch came on & I thought of this fill & this Yosuke & then my ice cream was saltier cause my tears were in it. Thought you'd like to know.
P.S. Thank you
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SPILL CANVAS IS MY FAVORITE BAND. HIGH FIVE.
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No, seriously. I feel like people have to have a reason to be THIS cruel.
I said all this to say that I love this story and when you update I squeal. Also, Souji is the best boyfriend ever.
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Yosuke let out a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding when Teddie trotted up to them, looking no worse for wear, and attached himself to Souji as though he hadn't seen him in 500 years. Damn bear. He was eating an ice cream bar, probably billed to Yosuke, and gestured vaguely with the stick to the vicinity of the entrance.
"That guy you told me not to talk to left a while ago."
"Did he say anything else to you?"
"Nope! Can we go home now? I'm hungry and I have to finish training my dragon."
Yosuke rolled his eyes. Oh well. He'd rather have Teddie here, annoying him, than talking to Seagull about cucumbers. He met Souji's eyes over the top of Teddie's head and Souji actually looked amused. Yosuke's annoyance melted into a smile. It was hard to be pissed off when Teddie was chattering happily and Souji was smiling gently and it was warm enough to almost be summer. He had a fleeting thought, a selfish thought, that if he could freeze the world just as it was, just like this, that he would do it, no matter how it affected anyone else. It was good, like this, with Teddie's sticky hand leaving fingerprints on his shirt every time he poked at him for no reason and Souji beside him, reassuring and confident as always. Yosuke didn't notice how close they were to home until they were standing outside and Souji was saying something he couldn't quite make out.
"Yosuke? Are you listening?"
"Sorry, partner."
"I was saying I'll come by tomorrow morning and we'll walk to school together. Okay?"
"Yeah. Okay. Thanks."
"See you tomorrow, then."
Souji grabbed his hand just for a moment, squeezed his fingers, and then released them, headed for home. Yosuke watched him go until the shape of him melted into the horizon and then went inside, sat on the couch and watched Teddie play video games and eat chips. Tomorrow. His heart was racing. He didn't know whether it would be better to hope that everybody knew or nobody knew. If everybody knew, it would be a really awful day but then it would be over all at once, sort of like ripping off a Band-Aid, and if he could get through the initial humiliation, all he'd have to do was wait for another Nagoya to show up, someone else to fuck up, and they'd all be onto the next thing, the next dog pile. Or, if only a few people knew... well, they'd whisper, sure, they'd talk, but Souji being there would contain the damage, right? Souji had been incredibly popular. There was no way they would think a guy like Souji would want to be around a guy like him if everything they were saying was really true.
I guess I'll find out tomorrow.
Teddie didn't even blink when Yosuke stood up, too involved in the game to notice if Yosuke caught fire, and Yosuke decided he might as well go to bed and get a head start on not being able to sleep. There was a sheet of paper on his desk that he nearly overlooked, carefully folded.
Yosuke,
Don't be afraid about tomorrow.
We'll be okay together.
0, 1, 1, I, 2, <3, 5, 8, 13, you.
Souji
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He forced himself fully awake when his alarm demanded it, pulled on his uniform and stared at himself in the mirror. His hands were shaking as he buttoned his jacket and he tried to will them to be still, finding it harder than he would have liked it to be. Yosuke was still stationed in front of the mirror when there was a knock at the door and he hurried to answer it. Souji was there, back in his uniform - where he belongs - with the third year pin on his collar - where it belongs - and Yosuke was so relieved to see him, so absurdly relieved, like he had been wondering if he had somehow imagined the past couple of days in the previous evening's near delirium. He checked his pocket and found Souji's note still there, safely tucked inside where he had placed it the night before.
"Ready?"
"Let's do this."
---
If this were a movie, Yosuke would have found the reactions to him and Souji walking into school to be almost comical in their conflict. The whispers began the second their feet crossed the foyer, but they were only whispers - only because of Souji, he knew, on his own he would have been confronted within seconds, probably with pictures shoved in his face - and more than once he caught someone staring at them openly, not even trying to be discreet, clearly weighing whether it was more important to make fun of Yosuke or to try to stay on Souji's good side, which was the path to "cool," whatever the hell that was these days, but which would also be mutually exclusive to making fun of Yosuke. He almost would have preferred the confrontation to the staring. The hallway fell silent, he could feel the eyes on him, he wanted to sink into the floor or run or... but Souji kept walking, expressionless, head held high and looking straight ahead as though completely unfazed, and Yosuke concentrated on keeping pace with him, walking in step with him, keeping his eyes on the floor until they reached their lockers.
Yosuke knew what he would find before he opened it - had expected it really - but had not expected to find the same thing in Souji's, plastered all over it, the first picture he had posted, the one he had taken during Souji's visit, screenshots from the feed... and sitting in the middle of it, a tiny throwaway video camera playing the video from the bathroom, edited to play some scenes over and over in a loop. He glanced over at Souji, still expressionless but clearly stunned at having everything thrust back in his face, and he was about to tell him not to look anymore when Souji suddenly, calmly, reached into his locker and took down the pictures, untaping each one of them with the same determination he used when he was folding envelopes in his room, and then stepping to the side and doing the same thing for Yosuke, finally balling them all up and neatly depositing them, along with the camera, in a nearby trashcan, and everything was still, silent, waiting, until Souji walked over to a second-year boy Yosuke thought he might have known from club activities last year.
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"Thank you. Do you happen to know who's been vandalizing my locker?"
"I... don't..."
"I'd really like to know."
"I got it, senpai. If I find out anything... I'll... let you know. Okay?"
The boy took his hand out of his pocket and extended it to Souji, which was something of an odd gesture, Yosuke thought, given the circumstances, but Souji didn't even blink, just grasped his hand and walked away as though everything was perfectly normal. The bell rang for class and the crowd of students dispersed, seemingly reluctantly, as he and Souji hurried to class themselves.
"What was that about?"
Yosuke was muttering under his breath as though the empty hallway could hear him. Maybe it could.
"He knows something."
Yosuke wanted to ask what, but they were already standing outside the door, and all he could do was look at Souji, not speaking. This was the part he had been dreading - having to walk into class alone, without Souji, until he was re-introduced to the class, just for a few minutes but it might as well be a few hours. Souji brushed their fingers together as Yosuke walked past him and through the door, trying to block out everything else except the path to his desk. He felt sick, like he might just throw up on the floor, and wouldn't that be appropriate? the final humiliation, but he kept the bile down, forced his feet one in front of the other, and slid into his seat beside Chie, trying for all he was worth not to keep his head down like he had something to be ashamed of, but really you do, and it was so much easier that way, to pretend they couldn't see him, to try to curl in on himself. Someone threw a crumpled piece of paper at him from across the room, probably one of those photos oh GOD what if everyone HAS THEM - but Yukiko deflected it and it fell to the floor in front of Chie, who lobbed it back at the thrower. Yosuke looked up for the first time. They had to know - both of them - but they still...
And then Yosuke heard the teacher outside, heard her enter the room and start to introduce Souji, and the chatter was instantaneous.
--'think he is, coming back like that'--
--'back? Probably to protect Hanamura, he'--
--'so sad when he left, but if he's really like THAT it's even worse'--
--'wonder what he thought of those pictures'--
--'definitely going to leave Hanamura alone if he's here'--
just like that it was done, Souji was sitting in front of him again, now besides Yukiko instead of Chie, different yet just as it had been, and Yosuke was struck with the ridiculous idea that the four of them were forming their own little island in the middle of the classroom, the only people in the room who weren't consumed with wanting to see him even more humiliated than he already was. He wondered if Kanji and Naoto were doing the same, deflecting things from him, shielding him, and when he remembered the things he had thought about them, about all of them, about Souji... it was all he could do to stay in his seat and stay calm.
Yosuke planned his day as the initial uproar about Souji subsided and the teacher launched into a monotonous lecture. Classroom time was fine, it was mostly lectures and anyone coming at him would have to go through the others and probably wouldn't bother. Lunch was a different story, because then they'd have reign to get up and surround him if they wanted to, but if the four of them could get outside before everyone else grouped up, that would be okay too. Before and after school would be a serious problem, though, if Souji wasn't there, and he couldn't expect Souji to be with him every single day. He was going to have to block them out, ignore them... things he had formerly had a lot of practice with. He had survived it then and he could survive it again. Whatever they threw in his face, it was nothing he hadn't started himself and nothing he couldn't run from.
---
From: Matsubara Ryohei (mryo12@goo.ne.jp)
Sent: Saturday, April 21, 2012 09:52:16
To: Kazunari Kenta (bouken55@live.jp)
eh shit
hanamura's boyfriend ain't buying it
gonna have to step it up
---
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They met the others and Yosuke found he had been dreading this part most of all, being back in the group with the people he had alienated and screamed at and embarrassed himself in front of, people that used to be his friends and were still his friends, but whom he had allowed himself to corrupt into something else, and he didn't know how to apologize for it. Worse, they had probably seen everything, every picture, that fucking video, and now that would be what they saw every time they looked at him, the skinny pathetic kid they could all easily imagine without clothes because they knew for fucking sure what was under them, and whenever they looked at him they'd see it. He scratched at his arm, wished he could peel off his skin and start over again, not put his body on the internet for every asshole with a monitor to stare at and exploit. How could he ever explain what he had done to his friends?
"Glad you're back, senpai," was the first thing Yosuke heard, from Kanji, and when he took his eyes off the concrete it was clear that Kanji was speaking not just to Souji but to both of them. Yosuke couldn't stand it anymore.
"I'm sorr-" he started to say, but Chie cut him off, grabbed his hand and kicked him in the shin. Well, at least she was acting normally.
"Shut up, Yosuke. Don't. Nothing to apologize for, okay?"
"But I--"
"Chie-senpai is correct. The person whose behavior necessitates an apology is not you, Yosuke-senpai. As to that matter..."
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From: Kazunari Kenta (bouken55@live.jp)
Sent: Saturday, April 21, 2012 11:45:52
To: Matsubara Ryohei (mryo12@goo.ne.jp)
why step it up
why go after hanamura at all
he was our friend once
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Naoto glanced over to Souji and Souji nodded, produced a piece of paper from his pocket, and Yosuke furrowed his brow, confused.
"What's that?"
"Suzuki-kun passed it to me this morning in the hallway."
Oh. That explained that weird handshake.
The guy who went after Hanamura-senpai is Mori from 2-D. I don't know anything else, Seta-senpai. I'm sorry.
"Does anyone know him?"
Nobody answered. Yosuke stared at the paper blankly. He had no idea who this guy was - had never even heard of him - what the fuck was his problem?
"What are we going to do, Souji-kun?"
Souji didn't respond at first. Yosuke looked over at him, sitting slightly forward with his elbows resting on his knees and his hands folded, and he was hit with another wave of guilt, this one stronger than the ones before it. Until now, he had been thinking only of himself - how embarrassed he was, how afraid he was, wondering what people would think of him, what his friends would think of him, how he was going to get through this - and he had not thought of how Souji was doing today, not once. This was affecting Souji, too, it was embarrassing to him as well, it was damaging his reputation too, but unlike Yosuke, he had done nothing to cause it. Souji hadn't asked to be humiliated, pointed at, whispered about, fucking outed - Yosuke had single-handedly done all of that for him, and it made him sick, and he was sorry, so fucking sorry.
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"Partner, don't..."
"I need to do this."
Yosuke couldn't argue with that. If Souji needed to talk to him - for whatever reason - then Yosuke had nothing to say about it. Souji was good at that, good at talking to people, understanding them, influencing them. Yosuke had the distinct feeling that Souji didn't want to have a heart-to-heart chat with this 'Mori,' whoever the hell he was, but that Souji had another goal in mind, something that this guy was just a part of. That was okay. That was how it usually was.
"I want to go with you."
Everyone was silent. If they all just fucking stare at me, I don't think I can take it - but they didn't. Souji just nodded.
"Okay."
"Okay?! Souji, you can't just - he just - hurt him! Yosuke can't--"
"He can. And if he wants to, he should. It's okay."
"Senpai, if you and Yosuke-senpai intend to confront him, it ought to be now. He will not be expecting you to mobilize so quickly."
"Naoto-kun is right. Go now. We'll keep watch."
Now? Yosuke hadn't been expecting it to be now... but would putting it off make it any easier? No, he'd just think about it, roll it over and over in his head until it made him sick and sat like lead in his stomach, until he had thought of every possible way it could go wrong and end badly, until it had him shivering under the blankets with his hair plastered to his forehead by sweat. He hated that, hated that he couldn't be like Souji, that he could never be like Souji. But... if he could never be like Souji, then putting it off was pointless.
"Yosuke?"
Souji was on his feet and Yosuke got to his.
I'm useless, partner, but somehow, with you, I think I can do anything. Even this.
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BTW, you might want to start a new thread again (hurhur /bad pun) - this one's getting awfully squashed. ;)
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