accidental breeders

[shannonmariah]

Hi. First-time poster. Here's what I have to say today ... why I should be and am part of the badparents community:

Holy frick; I could have written this paragraph:

Bennet-Speer says she'd never been very interested in children, but had assumed she'd have them because "that's what you do, get married and have kids." When she met her husband and he

Comments

[martina_d]

Hello....is that my own memory reflected back? Because I could have written this myself:
and partly I just really had zero interest in children. I still don't really. I mean, not in a maternal way. I have never been interested in holding people's babies. Until I had Emma and then started teaching, children scared me.

I never had the urge to hold anyone's babies, and when I was pregnant, I'd hold one when it was forced on me, and think, "Holy shit, what have I signed up for?" And yes, I was a teacher also. And a damn good one. But it's different with your own kids.

Well, now we have THREE, and I love it. But part of me, some days, still says, "Holy shit, what have I signed up for?"

Welcome! You're in the right place. =)

[dreamweaver523]

"Holy shit what have I signed up for"

EXACTLY!!! My kids are 23 and 13. I still have those moments ::weak laugh::

They were planned and wanted and all that jazz, but still...there are moments.

[martina_d]

It's so refreshing to be in a community where parents can actually say that without a cyber-bitchslap! It's just not all fun and games, and I don't think people really tell you that before you do it. Or, you don't hear it... =)

[dreamweaver523]

oh I completely TOTALLY agree with you. I am not perfect. My children are not perfect. My grandkid is not perfect. I have days where I want to close my door and read and not worry about soccer practices or volleyball games or kindergarten supplies or dinner. Now that the youngest kid is 13, I do that sometimes. She doesn't appear any the worse for wear.

[shannonmariah]

I don't think, traditionally, the generation before us really did talk about the hardest parts of parenting. And, yeah, if they did, we didn't hear it. But I really believe that's changing. Take this community, for instance!

Talking about it takes the isolation and loneliness of those dark spaces away, I think. I'm so thankful to be able to talk about it in safe places.

[dreamweaver523]

agreed....and yes, this is a great place.

I do know my mom has pointed out to me that the pill became available and that's why I am her last baby LOL She didn't say it in a nasty, bad way or anything, but yeah, she was DONE.

[shannonmariah]

Good to know -- thanks!

[summerific88]

"Holy shit, what have I signed up for?"

Is it bad that my son is only 6 months (almost 7) and I have already had these thoughts?! Haha... I do love my son but seriously, some days it's like wtf have I gotten myself into?!

[amphixious]

Ditto... I'm still intimidated by children. Others... not mine.