sjc
omigod omigod omigod so this is the end of my first full week at st. john's.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
it is everything i hoped and more. it is also everything i feared. it's bringing out the mother-instinct in me, to be surrounded by so many young people. (18 is so young! but 25 is also young! right? ack.) i want to take care of everyone, and i'm not sure exactly what that means (in every sense).
that should really be the school's motto, i think: "but what does that mean?"
all my tutors are awesome. i have never thought so deeply in my life, i think. i am constantly challenged and surprised, in pleasant and uncomfortable ways. (sometimes simultaneously.) i was right to come here.
but it is still strange. it feels a bit like summer camp. i don't quite believe i'll be living with these people for the next four years. i have yet to meet anyone i flat-out dislike, but i have only found one person so far with whom i really connect. (maybe two.) i've only been here a week but it feels at the same time like a year and only a day.
i miss my friends. and my family. and my partner. sigh.
big party tomorrow night, "seducers & corrupters" (i.e., "seducing & corrupting the youth of athens," one of the crimes of which socrates was accused). freshmen are supposed to wear white, but i don't really feel like i fit into that category. i feel compelled to tell everyone i meet that i am 25; it feels somehow dishonest not to mention it. i overheard a group of freshmen girls talking about how they took a year off between high school and sjc, and how high school seems like such a long time ago. i graduated from high school 8 years ago. it's enough to make anyone feel ooooooold.
and now i am sleepy, so i shall sleep.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
it is everything i hoped and more. it is also everything i feared. it's bringing out the mother-instinct in me, to be surrounded by so many young people. (18 is so young! but 25 is also young! right? ack.) i want to take care of everyone, and i'm not sure exactly what that means (in every sense).
that should really be the school's motto, i think: "but what does that mean?"
all my tutors are awesome. i have never thought so deeply in my life, i think. i am constantly challenged and surprised, in pleasant and uncomfortable ways. (sometimes simultaneously.) i was right to come here.
but it is still strange. it feels a bit like summer camp. i don't quite believe i'll be living with these people for the next four years. i have yet to meet anyone i flat-out dislike, but i have only found one person so far with whom i really connect. (maybe two.) i've only been here a week but it feels at the same time like a year and only a day.
i miss my friends. and my family. and my partner. sigh.
big party tomorrow night, "seducers & corrupters" (i.e., "seducing & corrupting the youth of athens," one of the crimes of which socrates was accused). freshmen are supposed to wear white, but i don't really feel like i fit into that category. i feel compelled to tell everyone i meet that i am 25; it feels somehow dishonest not to mention it. i overheard a group of freshmen girls talking about how they took a year off between high school and sjc, and how high school seems like such a long time ago. i graduated from high school 8 years ago. it's enough to make anyone feel ooooooold.
and now i am sleepy, so i shall sleep.