A mathematical breakthrough!!
ex + boyfriend = pointless drama
I guess it was unrealistic of me to presume that J and I could maintain a friendship after the breakup. I shouldn't have taken "let's just be friends" too literally. Now I realize that it was all just part of the script.
We dated for over a year, with four months of the time spent long-distance. He was in Prague, and I was in Japan. I was head-over-heels and high on love when I first arrived. Now that I look back, it was actually kind of pathetic. All of the other teachers in my training group knew about J after the second day I got here. I gushed about how wonderful J was to everyone who had ears to listen, and every spare second I had in between training sessions, I was at the phone or the computer talking to him. But it wasn't long before I discovered I was not built for long-distance relationships. By November, I found myself falling out of love. By December, it was kaput.
J was actually the one who initiated the breakup. He beat me to the punch. That bastard. I had the intention of splitting us up eventually, but it was just a few days shy of Christmas, and I didn't want to be the Grinch who fucked up his ho-ho holiday season. He was going on a backpacking adventure across Europe during the holidays anyway, so in my logic, we weren't going to be contact until January. But by mid-December, he sensed my "absence". I had distanced myself from him a lot farther than our physical distance, thousands of miles and a world apart. On December 19, we were offically over.
He said "let's be friends" first. I agreed. At least on my part, I was being genuine and whole-heartedly had the desire to maintain the friendship that we first had before we became a couple. And I know he's capable of holding on to his end of the bargain because he's still chummy with ALL of his ex's (except for that psycho bitch he once told me about). Seven months later, I still feel like he holds some sort of resentment towards me.* The first month or two, post-breakup, we exchanged e-mails regularly. And then his e-mails got shorter and shorter. They were spaced out within a span of weeks, which turned into a month, months, and then finally, nothing.
OK, so I don't exactly blame him. Whereas I was no longer attracted to him in December, he had already made up his mind that I "was the one". I was the bad guy who didn't reciprocate the same feelings. He was the victim. I broke his heart. I crushed his self-esteem. So maybe asking to be friends is a bit too much for him. But, damnit J, he can at least be civil.
[*J doesn't know about what happened back in December. The breakup happened before I could say anything. My friends said to let it go. It was selfish on my part. I know.]
It's his birthday today, the 26th. So I got a little confused with the dates and sent him a short&sweet birthday greeting a day earlier. It was a simple 3-sentence e-mail just wishing him a happy birthday. I wished him well, threw in a smiley face, and I made a brief reference to repatriation back to America.
This was his response: "uh, my b-day is tomorrow. but thanks anyway."
"Uh"? WTF? The rest of his e-mail, which wasn't very much at all, was retarded, immature, and cold. Even if he's demoted me down to an acquaintance or, hell, an enemy, he could've at least toned down the bitterness. Simma down! So much for being friends or trying to be nice at all. Fucker.
Moving on.
I guess it was unrealistic of me to presume that J and I could maintain a friendship after the breakup. I shouldn't have taken "let's just be friends" too literally. Now I realize that it was all just part of the script.
We dated for over a year, with four months of the time spent long-distance. He was in Prague, and I was in Japan. I was head-over-heels and high on love when I first arrived. Now that I look back, it was actually kind of pathetic. All of the other teachers in my training group knew about J after the second day I got here. I gushed about how wonderful J was to everyone who had ears to listen, and every spare second I had in between training sessions, I was at the phone or the computer talking to him. But it wasn't long before I discovered I was not built for long-distance relationships. By November, I found myself falling out of love. By December, it was kaput.
J was actually the one who initiated the breakup. He beat me to the punch. That bastard. I had the intention of splitting us up eventually, but it was just a few days shy of Christmas, and I didn't want to be the Grinch who fucked up his ho-ho holiday season. He was going on a backpacking adventure across Europe during the holidays anyway, so in my logic, we weren't going to be contact until January. But by mid-December, he sensed my "absence". I had distanced myself from him a lot farther than our physical distance, thousands of miles and a world apart. On December 19, we were offically over.
He said "let's be friends" first. I agreed. At least on my part, I was being genuine and whole-heartedly had the desire to maintain the friendship that we first had before we became a couple. And I know he's capable of holding on to his end of the bargain because he's still chummy with ALL of his ex's (except for that psycho bitch he once told me about). Seven months later, I still feel like he holds some sort of resentment towards me.* The first month or two, post-breakup, we exchanged e-mails regularly. And then his e-mails got shorter and shorter. They were spaced out within a span of weeks, which turned into a month, months, and then finally, nothing.
OK, so I don't exactly blame him. Whereas I was no longer attracted to him in December, he had already made up his mind that I "was the one". I was the bad guy who didn't reciprocate the same feelings. He was the victim. I broke his heart. I crushed his self-esteem. So maybe asking to be friends is a bit too much for him. But, damnit J, he can at least be civil.
[*J doesn't know about what happened back in December. The breakup happened before I could say anything. My friends said to let it go. It was selfish on my part. I know.]
It's his birthday today, the 26th. So I got a little confused with the dates and sent him a short&sweet birthday greeting a day earlier. It was a simple 3-sentence e-mail just wishing him a happy birthday. I wished him well, threw in a smiley face, and I made a brief reference to repatriation back to America.
This was his response: "uh, my b-day is tomorrow. but thanks anyway."
"Uh"? WTF? The rest of his e-mail, which wasn't very much at all, was retarded, immature, and cold. Even if he's demoted me down to an acquaintance or, hell, an enemy, he could've at least toned down the bitterness. Simma down! So much for being friends or trying to be nice at all. Fucker.
Moving on.