I Tried to be Open Minded, but...
I found this little gem of a special badfic. Really, I tried to open up to all the OCs in my tiny Sons of Anarchy fandom. I did. Then I saw this thing that has 7, yes you read that right, 7 Mary-Sues and ya'll she named each one after a goddess. *head hit the desk and never made it back up*
I bring you snippets with the spork in bold.
Freya sighed, running a hand through her auburn hair and rolling her green eyes I do have to admit I expected a little more from the description, but the name was enough. It's more than enough.. She took a deep breath, trying to get a grip on her temper. Before she could speak however, Nyx had taken over.
“It's already been put to a vote, Bastet. Athena, Freya, Gaea, Hemera, Karma Sweet Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, this suethor clearly can Google with the best of them. and I think that it’s best to go somewhere small. For one, we run a chop shop-small town offers lots of anonymity, Ummm, actually wouldn't it be easier to blend a chop shop into a large city? In a small town everyone and their brother is going to wonder what the new kids are doing in that garage. and a chance to import from the cities. Yeah, who doesn't like to add the stress of possibly getting caught shipping stolen merchandise when you really don't have to. Two, if it sounds like something out of a soap opera, chances are that the Reapers won’t find us. Three, there’s another gang there that we can more than likely become allies with. Allies? Is that the new term for systematically destroying all the poor unsuspecting men of canon? And four, the clubhouse has already been packed up and sent off to the place Freya bought in Charming, so if you want your shit, you have to go.” Nahhh, you can totally stay. Pretty pretty please? If I just try hard enough maybe I can save just one of the boys.
Bastet snorted in disbelief.
“The Daughters of Discord don’t have allies.” Holy bejeezus! You've got to be kidding me! I seen the title of the fic, but I thought it was a joke. The Sons of Anarchy are going to join forces with the Daughters of Discord and have all kinds of fun shmexytimes while my poor heart breaks. Hrmph.
Freya glanced up from where she was strapping her saddle bag onto her bike.
“The Daughters of Discord do what I lead them to do. We’re tough, No, you're obnoxious. and we’re well known, but we’re small. Let’s face facts here Those are LONG gone., ladies, the Reapers know this and will capitalize on it. They know us, all of us, very well; our biggest physical weaknesses and our biggest emotional ones. Already slept your way through that group I see. We have a better chance of making a stand in Charming-a better chance at prospects, too. The Sons of Anarchy don’t allow women to be members, but if we form an alliance with them, who’s to say their wives, girlfriends and daughters won’t join up?” *raises hand* I say. The suethor and I both know that not one of those established lady friends of the boys is going to survive this fic. Except Gemma and that's just because she's pretty Jax's mama and doesn't every little fangirl just want to be her very bestest friend. *HEAD DESK*
Snip to end... of only the first chapter I'm afraid to say
“We’re sisters, so like Nyx said, we ride or die together, bitch. Always.” I vote for die. All of them. Together. Now please.
Hemera and Gaea both patted their president on the shoulder, choosing to stand in silent solidarity with the rest of their sisters. Karma chose to throw the goat in passing, before mounting her bike. After a moment of hesitation, Bastet nodded her agreement, before heading to her own bike. That was all just so very unnecessary.
Freya smirked, as she glanced around the back yard one last time, and then gave the house a parting glance. She then shook back her red hair and pulled on a black full face helmet.
The others had already rolled out into the driveway behind the black mustang that Lexi would be driving, and were revving their engines. I'm sure the neighborhood thanks you. Freya followed suit, taking her place in front of the car. She gave the quiet neighborhood street a once over before nodding to the others over her shoulder, and peeling out.
As the Daughters of Discord rolled out of Charlotte that night, the only thing visible besides the headlights on their bikes were the neon purple phoenix on the back of their leather jackets. GTFO! Neon purple?! I would be laughing my ass off all the way down the highway if I saw a bunch of biker chicks with NEON PURPLE lettering all over their jackets saying Daughters of Discord. You would be too. Edited for my own stupidity. I think my Saturday might be spent digging out my old English notes.
I bring you snippets with the spork in bold.
Freya sighed, running a hand through her auburn hair and rolling her green eyes I do have to admit I expected a little more from the description, but the name was enough. It's more than enough.. She took a deep breath, trying to get a grip on her temper. Before she could speak however, Nyx had taken over.
“It's already been put to a vote, Bastet. Athena, Freya, Gaea, Hemera, Karma Sweet Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, this suethor clearly can Google with the best of them. and I think that it’s best to go somewhere small. For one, we run a chop shop-small town offers lots of anonymity, Ummm, actually wouldn't it be easier to blend a chop shop into a large city? In a small town everyone and their brother is going to wonder what the new kids are doing in that garage. and a chance to import from the cities. Yeah, who doesn't like to add the stress of possibly getting caught shipping stolen merchandise when you really don't have to. Two, if it sounds like something out of a soap opera, chances are that the Reapers won’t find us. Three, there’s another gang there that we can more than likely become allies with. Allies? Is that the new term for systematically destroying all the poor unsuspecting men of canon? And four, the clubhouse has already been packed up and sent off to the place Freya bought in Charming, so if you want your shit, you have to go.” Nahhh, you can totally stay. Pretty pretty please? If I just try hard enough maybe I can save just one of the boys.
Bastet snorted in disbelief.
“The Daughters of Discord don’t have allies.” Holy bejeezus! You've got to be kidding me! I seen the title of the fic, but I thought it was a joke. The Sons of Anarchy are going to join forces with the Daughters of Discord and have all kinds of fun shmexytimes while my poor heart breaks. Hrmph.
Freya glanced up from where she was strapping her saddle bag onto her bike.
“The Daughters of Discord do what I lead them to do. We’re tough, No, you're obnoxious. and we’re well known, but we’re small. Let’s face facts here Those are LONG gone., ladies, the Reapers know this and will capitalize on it. They know us, all of us, very well; our biggest physical weaknesses and our biggest emotional ones. Already slept your way through that group I see. We have a better chance of making a stand in Charming-a better chance at prospects, too. The Sons of Anarchy don’t allow women to be members, but if we form an alliance with them, who’s to say their wives, girlfriends and daughters won’t join up?” *raises hand* I say. The suethor and I both know that not one of those established lady friends of the boys is going to survive this fic. Except Gemma and that's just because she's pretty Jax's mama and doesn't every little fangirl just want to be her very bestest friend. *HEAD DESK*
Snip to end... of only the first chapter I'm afraid to say
“We’re sisters, so like Nyx said, we ride or die together, bitch. Always.” I vote for die. All of them. Together. Now please.
Hemera and Gaea both patted their president on the shoulder, choosing to stand in silent solidarity with the rest of their sisters. Karma chose to throw the goat in passing, before mounting her bike. After a moment of hesitation, Bastet nodded her agreement, before heading to her own bike. That was all just so very unnecessary.
Freya smirked, as she glanced around the back yard one last time, and then gave the house a parting glance. She then shook back her red hair and pulled on a black full face helmet.
The others had already rolled out into the driveway behind the black mustang that Lexi would be driving, and were revving their engines. I'm sure the neighborhood thanks you. Freya followed suit, taking her place in front of the car. She gave the quiet neighborhood street a once over before nodding to the others over her shoulder, and peeling out.
As the Daughters of Discord rolled out of Charlotte that night, the only thing visible besides the headlights on their bikes were the neon purple phoenix on the back of their leather jackets. GTFO! Neon purple?! I would be laughing my ass off all the way down the highway if I saw a bunch of biker chicks with NEON PURPLE lettering all over their jackets saying Daughters of Discord. You would be too. Edited for my own stupidity. I think my Saturday might be spent digging out my old English notes.