[Audio to Accidental Video] Merry Christmas, here's your sermon...
[Shane and Rick have gotten some Christmas Spirit and decided to include Daryl, so a quick audio transmission that is far from private is made.]
Hey Daryl, get your ass on over here, we're just crackin' this bottle of whiskey open.
[Shane believes he's shut off the device at his side as he sits it down, but has in fact left it on as he continues talking, clearly already inebriated off an earlier bottle.]
"You remember Lisa Johnson? Fff.. what am I askin'? Y'probaly knew her better than I ever did. Y'know I always sorta looked up to you. I wanted t'be you."[ Yup.. you know...he's drunk. He comes all the 'I love you mans'. ]
[ Shane chuckles] "Oh I knew her, knew her real well. Favorite spot was under the bleachers right after the football games."[ There's a wink, he knows you’re drunk bro but so is he so it's all good. ]"Course you wanted to be me, I was gettin' some and from more than just high school girls."
[ He tosses back another shot, sets the glass down and scrubs a hand over his face. "Let's not talk 'bout the not high school portion of that."[ Considering that road would just lead to places Rick, even drunk, doesn't want to head to. ]"You know what I miss? That run down barn at the back of Mister Carlson's farm. The one we used to have the parties at. The one where your sister introduced us to Lori."[ Rick sighs.] "'fore we head down memory lane though, I think y' owed me a sermon didn't you? You feel up to it?" That was a bit of a challenge there for you, but of course he knows you’re going to deliver. You always do.
[And deliver he does, not only to Rick but the entire city which has heard the conversation up to this point and now gets a good video shot of two drunken sheriff deputies, taking a long sip of the bottle of whiskey he cocks his head to the side and gives Rick a cocky smirk.]
Seems you’re right brotha. Boobs, can’t live with ‘em and sure as hell can’t live without ‘em, man. I swear to god, every time I give a pair of them a key it’s a headache just waitin’ to happen. But you see that is where the guy gospel comes in handy “Thou shall not let the boobs rule you but instead you must rule the boobs.” Polite version of course. Really just means grab hold of the suckers and have some fun. [smirks.] But thanks to our chromosomes when ya got a nice pair starin’ ya in the face stayin’ strong is not always an easy thing.
And they know it, oh baby do they know. Reverend Shane is preachin’ to you know boy, listen close. They know once you go for the boobs it’s all over, s’why they decorate them up so nice to begin with. That’s when I wanna be strong and just tell ‘em, cover ‘em up sweetheart before someone bites one. Course I don’t, I go with the polite version. And maybe a nibble or two…
[Pauses long enough to take another drink, blissfully unaware of his broadcasting state.]
Hey Daryl, get your ass on over here, we're just crackin' this bottle of whiskey open.
[Shane believes he's shut off the device at his side as he sits it down, but has in fact left it on as he continues talking, clearly already inebriated off an earlier bottle.]
"You remember Lisa Johnson? Fff.. what am I askin'? Y'probaly knew her better than I ever did. Y'know I always sorta looked up to you. I wanted t'be you."[ Yup.. you know...he's drunk. He comes all the 'I love you mans'. ]
[ Shane chuckles] "Oh I knew her, knew her real well. Favorite spot was under the bleachers right after the football games."[ There's a wink, he knows you’re drunk bro but so is he so it's all good. ]"Course you wanted to be me, I was gettin' some and from more than just high school girls."
[ He tosses back another shot, sets the glass down and scrubs a hand over his face. "Let's not talk 'bout the not high school portion of that."[ Considering that road would just lead to places Rick, even drunk, doesn't want to head to. ]"You know what I miss? That run down barn at the back of Mister Carlson's farm. The one we used to have the parties at. The one where your sister introduced us to Lori."[ Rick sighs.] "'fore we head down memory lane though, I think y' owed me a sermon didn't you? You feel up to it?" That was a bit of a challenge there for you, but of course he knows you’re going to deliver. You always do.
[And deliver he does, not only to Rick but the entire city which has heard the conversation up to this point and now gets a good video shot of two drunken sheriff deputies, taking a long sip of the bottle of whiskey he cocks his head to the side and gives Rick a cocky smirk.]
Seems you’re right brotha. Boobs, can’t live with ‘em and sure as hell can’t live without ‘em, man. I swear to god, every time I give a pair of them a key it’s a headache just waitin’ to happen. But you see that is where the guy gospel comes in handy “Thou shall not let the boobs rule you but instead you must rule the boobs.” Polite version of course. Really just means grab hold of the suckers and have some fun. [smirks.] But thanks to our chromosomes when ya got a nice pair starin’ ya in the face stayin’ strong is not always an easy thing.
And they know it, oh baby do they know. Reverend Shane is preachin’ to you know boy, listen close. They know once you go for the boobs it’s all over, s’why they decorate them up so nice to begin with. That’s when I wanna be strong and just tell ‘em, cover ‘em up sweetheart before someone bites one. Course I don’t, I go with the polite version. And maybe a nibble or two…
[Pauses long enough to take another drink, blissfully unaware of his broadcasting state.]