Match 04 | Sasagawa Ryohei | [In Person]

[lionpunchinist]

[Ryohei is in a small forest clearing, with a deer carcass. How he managed to catch a deer with his loud voice and impatience? Who knows, it must have been a really stupid deer.

He's kindling a campfire, and surprisingly enough he seems to be doing it properly, as a few minutes later he succeeds in making a cozy little campfire. The only problem is

Comments

action; excuse the slow though >__>

[finalarbiter]

[With a make-shift fishing rod and a small fish or two in hand, Light is making his way back to his shelter for the week, when he hears the familiar shouting. First of all, it's surprising enough that Ryohei had been able to catch any kind of animal, but the fact that he might still starve this week just adds in a nice touch of cruel humor. As there's little sense in wasting perfectly good deer meat, Light against some of his better judgment approaches Ryohei.]

You look like you could use some [a lot of] help there, Sasagawa.

action; yepyep nvn [1/5? 8I;;m-might go up to six btw L-LOL;;]

[lionpunchinist]

[While giving a friendly and enthusiastic hand wave:] HOOVE-SENPA--

action [2/3 LOL forget that I thought this was going to go up to six]

[lionpunchinist]

WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME HOOVE-SENPAI?!!!! YOUR REAL NAME EXTREMELY ISN'T HOOVE-SENPAI, HOOVE-SENPAI!!! ISN'T IT.....[Short-term memory is kicking in]..LAMP-POST?!!

action [3/3]

[lionpunchinist]

BUT I'LL FORGIVE YOU FOR LYING TO ME TO THE EXTREME LIKE A TRUE MAN LAMP-POST!!

...

IF YOU HELP ME COOK THIS DEER!!

action; 1/...something

[finalarbiter]

[...Lamp-post? Light raises his eyebrow, looking entirely unamused by this new nickname. It's difficult to say if "Lamp-post" is better or worse than "Hoove-Senpai." At the very least, Hoove-senpai isn't a pun on his given name; he's heard more than enough of those to satisfy a lifetime. As much as Light would like to give Ryohei the benefit of the doubt that he would know that any rational parent would not name their child after a metal post, if only in the interest of Light's sanity.... he can't do that. For one, he doubts Ryohei even knows what a pun is, and... secondly... just look at how the idiot was trying to cook deer.]

2/2

[finalarbiter]

[And then it occurs to Light: Ryohei, in his own very rudimentary and transparent way, is attempting to blackmail him into helping him cook the deer. Light is honestly not even sure what to make of this. Laugh? Put his palm to his face? Given Ryohei's intelligence --or lack thereof-- he probably hadn't meant for there to be an insidious undertone. Had the suggestion come from L, Light may have spent a few precious seconds calculating what actions might result in lowered or raised percentages, before dismissing the entire exchange as irrelevant as L is dead and therefore not a threat. Ryohei and L at least shared that much in common.]

[Cordially, as though Light doesn't have a single care in the world:] Start calling me Light, and we have a deal.

[ACTION!!!!!111] also- i know u see wut i did thar [1/2]

[lionpunchinist]

I DOUBT YOU EVEN KNOW HOW TO COOK A DEER LAMP-POST!!!

[ACTION!!!!!111][2/2]

[lionpunchinist]

[...Of course right after he says that his stomach grumbles somewhat loudly.]

.....YOU HAVE A DEAL LIGHT!

[He throws the deer at Light.]

action;

[finalarbiter]

[As no person in their right mind would just throw a three hundred pound deer, it takes Light a moment before he realizes what Ryohei just did. Even with superior reflexes from his years of competitive tennis, he barely has the time to side step. Luckily, for him and for Ryohei he manages to avoid getting hurt. Still too stunned to be angry:]

Are you insane? That could have killed someone.

action;

[lionpunchinist]

WHO?!!

[Sorry Light, BOXING CLUB MEMBERS ARE EXPECTED TO BE ABLE TO AT LEAST CATCH A FULL-GROWN DEER.]

action;

[finalarbiter]

......

[Right, this is Sasagawa. The idiot. The only person stupid enough to actually sap Light of the will to speak, or even the will to argue. There's just no sense in arguing with a moron, that would require a level of masochism that Light doesn't have in him.

Calmly, Light moves over to pick up his makeshift fishing rod, and his catches from the lake, and turns to leave without another word.]

action;

[lionpunchinist]

WAIT UP LAMP-POST!! [It took him a grand total of two minutes to forget about the deal...]

ARE WE [you] COOKING THIS SOMEWHERE ELSE TO THE EXTREME?!

[Ryohei chases after follows Light with the deer carcass on his shoulders. FELLOW BOXING CLUB MEMBERS CAN'T BE LEFT IN THE WOODS ALL ALONE.]