31 Day Blog Challenge - Day 20
Day 20 asks about a difficult time in my life. Which, I'm trying really hard not to think about as I'm so busy fighting this bout of depression and thinking it's coming to an end.
I think the two hardest times were losing my Daddy and dropping out of college.
My Daddy died in March 1993, the year I would have turned 12. He had cancer, it had started off as lung cancer when I was like 7. He had radiation therapy but it didn't work and spread pretty rapidly, leaving him riddled. By the time he passed away, all they could do was give him morphine and try to keep him comfy.
Dropping out of college, the second time around, was due to what, in hindsight, was my first real battle with depression. I'd had to drop out in the Feb of my first year for an operation on my knee, and then restarted the first year that September. All my friends were in the second year, everyone who was coming into the first year already knew each other and in cliques. A years age difference is a LOT at 16/17/18 - I had no friends, I was ridiculously lonely, I was repeating work and bored... I had no energy, no interest and just... faded away, really. I had no idea what was going on and it was terrifying.
Now, I try to find some happy thoughts!
I think the two hardest times were losing my Daddy and dropping out of college.
My Daddy died in March 1993, the year I would have turned 12. He had cancer, it had started off as lung cancer when I was like 7. He had radiation therapy but it didn't work and spread pretty rapidly, leaving him riddled. By the time he passed away, all they could do was give him morphine and try to keep him comfy.
Dropping out of college, the second time around, was due to what, in hindsight, was my first real battle with depression. I'd had to drop out in the Feb of my first year for an operation on my knee, and then restarted the first year that September. All my friends were in the second year, everyone who was coming into the first year already knew each other and in cliques. A years age difference is a LOT at 16/17/18 - I had no friends, I was ridiculously lonely, I was repeating work and bored... I had no energy, no interest and just... faded away, really. I had no idea what was going on and it was terrifying.
Now, I try to find some happy thoughts!