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Stars and garters above! Isn't it time for a new post? The last one is just so... big now, isn't it? I don't know if even I could take it... ♥
SHIN MEGAMI TENSEI: PERSONA 4 KINK MEME
PART FIVEAs all you charming little anonymous know, in this very post of mine, you can comment anonymously with any pairing from Persona 4 and whatever astoundingly ( Read more... )
SHIN MEGAMI TENSEI: PERSONA 4 KINK MEME
PART FIVEAs all you charming little anonymous know, in this very post of mine, you can comment anonymously with any pairing from Persona 4 and whatever astoundingly ( Read more... )
Fifteen minutes passed, then another fifteen, then another. It occurred to Souji that he didn’t really know what triggered a Shadow’s appearance, beyond an extended stay on this side of the television. His own had appeared under duress, but Yosuke’s seemed content to show up to torment him simply at its own whim. Maybe Nanako’s would take its time. Maybe it wasn’t coming at all.
“Do you think I did it wrong?” asked Nanako as they approached the end of the first hour. “I didn’t accept it when it first appeared. Maybe I missed my chance…”
“Hard to say,” said Souji. “It’s not like we have a handbook for this kind of thing.”
“Maybe I don’t have a Persona after all…”
“It’s possible.”
“That’s kind of messed,” said Yosuke. “I thought for sure Nanako-chan would get one someday. How come some people don’t have them at all, and you have like, a hundred?”
Souji frowned, but otherwise ignored the mild streak of bitterness in Yosuke’s words.
“Ken-kun said he knew somebody else who had a lot of Personas,” said Nanako. “Have you talked to him about it?”
“Yes,” said Souji. “He doesn’t have any answers for me. Just more questions.”
“You never told me that…” Yosuke began, and Souji had to move quickly to end the conversation before it turned the way he knew it would.
“There was nothing to tell,” he insisted, in a very clipped and closed manner that silenced Yosuke, but also darkened the expression on his face. “Like I said - Amada-kun doesn’t have any answers for us.”
The last word hung heavily on the silence that followed: not just me this time, but us. Finding another Persona-user, one whose powers had developed in a different place and time, had at first seemed like just the thing they needed; Amada’s guidance had been essential in returning Yosuke’s Shadow to his body, so surely he would have some idea as to why his Persona had not returned as well. But he had no more answers for that problem than he did for Souji’s questions about this other young man capable of manifesting multiple other selves. They were, for the time being at least, on their own.
“I don’t like it,” said Yosuke. “That guy knows all about us, but he doesn’t seem to want us to know about them. Doesn’t that seem weird to you?”
“It’s not weird,” Nanako retorted. “Ken-kun’s friends are involved in business and the police and things like that. He can’t just blab about them whenever he feels like it.”
“He could tell us. We’re all Persona-users, right? We’re kind of on the same side, here…”
From across one of the metal walkways that connected the entrance hall hub to the rest of the TV world, there was a scuffle and a loud crash, and Souji held up a hand to call for quiet. The three of them stood stock-still for a moment as they waited to see what had caused the disturbance, and then Souji made a quick gesture with his raised hand. Yosuke ducked behind the stack of televisions and emerged with a sword, which he tossed to Souji, and a pair of knives that he quickly tucked up against his sleeves.
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In another minute, the figures responsible for the commotion came into view: black, writhing masses with bright pinprick eyes, dragging themselves closer and closer toward their position with their gangly, spidery arms. There weren’t more than half a dozen, but their appearance at all was an unwelcome intrusion.
“What the hell?” Yosuke hissed, bringing his knives up to shield his body. “Since when do the shadows come this far out?”
“It’s unusual,” Souji agreed. He raised his sword in a guard that would not deter the creatures’ approach in any way, but would at least buy him a second if they decided to strike first. “Nanako-chan, don’t leave Yosuke’s side.”
Nanako nodded and moved closer to Yosuke, behind him and out of the way of his range of motion. Yosuke didn’t argue effectively being told to stay behind, but that didn’t surprise Souji. As angry as he was at Souji’s attempts to keep him out of harm’s way, and as eager as he was to prove he was still capable in battle, he was as no-nonsense as ever when it came to protecting someone he cared about.
They came together in the middle of the entrance hall, encircled by the stark black and white rings and the disturbing figures outlined in chalk on the pristine tile floor, marred only by an old coppery stain that lay beneath Souji’s feet. He glanced down at it, recalled the crushing despair he had felt on the day it had been made, and he promised his two most important people in that moment that he would not let anything like that happen again.
The shadows at the head of the group rushed toward them, and Souji dashed out to meet them head-on. He lashed out with his sword in one, two, three, four perfectly precise cuts, severing flailing limbs and slicing bodies that were eerily insubstantial. Their guttural screams rose up around him as he killed them, as they lost their arms to his blade while they grabbed for him. While they writhed and died on the floor, he stepped over their carcasses, silently daring the others congregating on the walkway to come and meet the same fate as the ones he had slaughtered: they didn’t move. He felt powerful with a sword in his hand, an unshakeable pillar of strength that would need to be toppled if the shadows had any hope of bringing harm upon his family, and, being creatures of instinct, they felt that power keenly, and hesitated in the name of self-preservation.
The standoff lasted only a handful of seconds. Souji started toward them, flicking the oily black blood from his blade as he stalked across the floor, and though they visibly recoiled, they did not flee. He raised his sword, fully prepared to cut them down - and stopped. Beyond them, further down the walkway, more dark shapes appeared in the fog, and then more beyond them that were still nearly indistinguishable from this distance. Souji took a step back.
“There’s a lot more coming,” he called back to Yosuke and Nanako. “Something’s going on. Let’s head back before this gets out of hand.”
“Yosuke-nii-!”
Souji whirled on the spot. Yosuke was standing where he’d left him, with Nanako close by, but his weapons were lowered, and he was staring out into the sea of fog with a vacant expression on his face - and behind them, another host of shadows was crawling over the walkway on the opposite side of the lot. “Yosuke!”
Yosuke started as he snapped back to reality. Nanako yanked on his arm, and he immediately turned around and headed to cut off the shadows’ approach, knives flashing wildly. Souji didn’t have time to be confused. Emboldened by the arrival of reinforcements, the shadows closest to him launched their attack, and he had to turn his full attention to countering them before he was overwhelmed. Realizing he couldn’t fight them all one by one, he drew a deep, calming breath, and called out to his other selves for aid.
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“Big bro-!” Nanako shouted. Souji looked to her, and then to where she was pointing. Opposite the stack of televisions, long black arms were reaching up over the edge of the railing, grasping for something to hold on to.
“Come on!” Yosuke groaned, as he viciously stabbed another shadow. “Where the hell are they all coming from?!”
“We’re leaving,” Souji declared. “Now.”
“Yeah, good call, partner.”
Yosuke threw one of his knives at the shadow closest to Souji, which staggered backward to dodge, giving them enough time to safely disengage and make a run for the televisions. Keeping Nanako practically glued to his side, and with Yosuke grasping the hem of his shirt so he wouldn’t be left behind, Souji clambered through the lowest of the television screens and pulled them to safety.
Nanako was disappointed that their expedition into the other world had failed; she didn’t say as much out loud, but she was quiet and withdrawn the whole way home and for the rest of the evening. Souji promised her that they would look into what had caused the unusual surge of shadows inside the TV, and when it was taken care of, they would try again, even if it meant waiting until she came home during Golden Week or later. That cheered her up somewhat, but it was clear she was frustrated with the failure of either her Shadow or her Persona to show, and probably worried about what that might mean.
Souji slept well, exhausted from the physically demanding work of sword fighting and the mentally demanding work of summoning his Personas. He woke only once in the middle of the night, and was about to roll over and go back to sleep when he noticed that Yosuke, in the fashion he had taken to lately, was still awake.
“Can’t sleep?” Souji murmured, pulling up closer to him and draping an arm across his chest.
“Mm.”
“Something on your mind?”
Yosuke let the silence that followed that question drag out just a bit too long before answering, “Yeah, just - worried about Ted. There were an awful lot of shadows… And we’ve never seen them get that close to our entrance before. He might be in trouble in there.”
“I think you’re right,” Souji agreed. “There was something off about their behaviour. We should bring the others with us next time and check it out as soon as we can.”
Yosuke turned his head on his pillow to look at him. “Do I hear a me included in that group?”
Only because I’m exhausted and comfortable and miss this and I don’t want to fight, thought Souji. He pressed closer to Yosuke under the blankets and pulled him tighter into the fold of his arms. “We’ll be safer in a larger group,” he mumbled. “And I won’t leave you out of something like that. You did great today.”
“…Thanks, partner.”
They kissed, briefly and chastely; a quick affirmation of their bond rather than a prelude to something more intimate. Souji was far too worn out for much more than that anyway, and Yosuke was distracted and distant - there, but also somewhere else entirely. When Souji kissed the corner of his mouth and Yosuke barely seemed to realize he’d done it, Souji suspected that Teddie was not the only concern keeping Yosuke awake that night.
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Another long, long pause. “Like what?” Yosuke asked.
“You tell me.”
Yosuke shrugged. “I… honestly, I don’t know. It might have been my Shadow. Might have been Susano-O. It was - I don’t know, it was far away. Too far away to hear.”
“So you weren’t hearing it, then.”
“No. Argh, it’s… it’s hard to explain. You know what it’s like when someone you trust gives you really good advice? Even if it wasn’t your idea, you still feel awesome just going along with it? That’s what it felt like. I don’t know what it was telling me to do, but I - partner, I really, really wanted to do it.”
And that’s when Souji heard it: an alarming strain in Yosuke’s voice that drastically altered the entire context of his words. Whatever Yosuke had felt compelled to do, he hadn’t wanted to want to do it at all.
“…You lost control of yourself?” Souji asked.
“Just for a second. I saw you tear through those shadows, and then the next thing I knew, Nanako was tugging my arm…“
Souji covered first his eyes with his hand, and then his mouth, stifling an exasperated sigh. It wasn’t Yosuke’s fault; there was no point in getting angry. But now he knew for certain that he couldn’t take Yosuke with him to the other world if he was going to have another blank spell at a critical moment. Today could have gone much, much worse. He’d been foolish to cave to Yosuke’s demands, instead of doing what he knew was right.
“Okay,” he finally said, when he had calmed down a little. “Let me know if it happens again - especially out here. We’ll figure it out.”
Yosuke snorted derisively. “Throw it on the pile, I guess. I’m sure we’ll get around to it whenever Susano-O decides to wander home.”
“I still feel like Naoto was on to something the last time we saw her. Your Shadow probably still wants something from you. Have you given that any more thought?”
“I’m trying, partner, honestly.” Yosuke sighed deeply. “It’s confusing. This’d be so much easier if it was like going to see a doctor or a shrink or something. Let someone else take a look at me and tell me what they think is wrong.”
Souji paused. “That actually gives me an idea,” he said.
“Uh… it does?” Yosuke asked sceptically. “I don’t think this is the kind of problem a shrink can help me with, dude…”
“No, not that,” said Souji. “Well, kind of. Instead of someone looking at you, it’d be you looking at someone else.”
“…Yeah, you’ve totally lost me.”
“Bear with me for a second. Shadows like we know them are something that their hosts know about, but deny to themselves and keep hidden from everyone else. But a normal Shadow - a psychological one - is actually the opposite. It’s something that’s easy for everyone else to see, but difficult for the individual to accept is a part of them. They might not even have any idea it’s there at all. So some people think that when you encounter a person you really dislike, what you’re reacting to isn’t really something about them, but rather, something hidden about yourself that you see reflected in that person. They display something horrible that you can’t even admit is a part of you, so you take it out on them instead. Get it?”
“I think so…”
“So…” said Souji slowly. “Let’s give it a try. What don’t you like about me?”
Yosuke stared at him in the darkness like he had grown at least two extra heads. “You’re kidding me.”
“I won’t get mad. I want to help you figure this out.”
“I don’t - dude, I don’t know. There isn’t really anything.”
“Yosuke, we’ve been at each other’s throats for months now. There has to be something.”
“Yeah, okay, you give me pop quizzes at two in the morning,” Yosuke huffed. “Look, I’ll think about it, okay? It’s a part of me, so obviously I must know what it wants. I just have to try harder.”
“…Okay,” said Souji, willing to concede that the dead of night was perhaps not the best time for this particular exercise. He kissed him once more, and rested his head comfortably near the crook of his neck. “Sleep on it, then.”
“All right,” Yosuke mumbled. “I’ll sleep on it.”
But he didn’t.
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I'm loving this more and more, and what you called "a giant ball of yarn of dropped plot threads" got me hooked--it looks more intriguing as it goes. More surprises coming out, I see. <333 I like how you described Souji's determination to protect his 'family'--it gives a firmer feeling of their bond, if you know what I mean. And it's really, really nice to see taht small moment of Souji-Yosuke-Nanako's little not-quite-bickering with Souji-Nanako teamed up to tease Yosuke. Reading it, I feel like saying "Aah~ some things just don't change~~" :p Oh, and I love how Yosuke is still all "Dude, it's that annoying bear Teddy, what do you expect?" but then goes all worried and stuff over the so-called dumb bear. XDDD I like their brotherly-bonding for some reason~
The last scene is just pure sweet. I love love love love love that so much. *is a sucker for S/Y subtle fluff* Even with all the things they speak of and the invisible tension hanging in the air, it's just--oh, anon, I don't even. Your fluff is just special. And is it just me, or both Souji and Yosuke seems to start hiding things from each other so as not to start a fight? I smell drama~~~ *is bricked*
A--anyway, I probably didn't make much sense--my English is getting worse so I'm sorry if you couldn't understand the things I said. But anon, know that I can barely wait for the nexk installment! XD Will be waiting eagerly, and thank you so, so much for continuing!
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Very anxious to read more! I love the angst developing here. XD
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Your Yosuke worries me a lot - it seems like he hasn't a lost a lot of the insecurities that defined him as a kid. I can't wait to read more!
(And seconding the love about Yosuke & his references to Teddie. They have the cutest relationship.)
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